August 31st, 2017 at 12:21 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 12:32 PM ^
Come on, the elevator on the left works just fine, at least most of the time. However, when it gets close to reaching its maximum load, it sometimes stops between floors, says it's having problems with its cables and motor, and quits being an elevator entirely for a year or two.
Also, attractive undergrad girls are strongly advised not to take the elevator on the left. It's a bit...grabby...
August 31st, 2017 at 12:36 PM ^
shaft.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:09 PM ^
it goes to 0.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:35 PM ^
syfy not too long ago. Predictably, it was not good.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:53 PM ^
But it had a HUGE, SHOCKING twist ending. The twist was...you were revealed as a dipshit for believing M. Night Shamlsfnanknsdfklnnngsdhbhh would ever again make a movie as good as "The Sixth Sense"...
August 31st, 2017 at 2:23 PM ^
Even then, Sixth Sense was a ripoff of Jacob's Ladder, which was a much deeper movie, IMO.
August 31st, 2017 at 3:46 PM ^
God I loved that movie. But it made me horrified to try LSD. Until I tried LSD. And then I loved LSD. And now me and my flashbacks remember LSD fondly...
August 31st, 2017 at 12:40 PM ^
Lead to the "circle of trust."
August 31st, 2017 at 4:48 PM ^
Sent from MGoBlog HD for iPhone & iPad
August 31st, 2017 at 6:44 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 2:10 PM ^
Just asked the google, no answer. Please share a link or a story. New one to me.
August 31st, 2017 at 3:05 PM ^
there are heavy rumors that his "condition" in FL was a co-ed and infered rumor was wife forcing choice between job and continued marriage
August 31st, 2017 at 6:33 PM ^
definitely taken the one on the left.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:36 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 1:32 PM ^
used car dealership.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:38 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 1:00 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 12:54 PM ^
The Bunny Ranch?
August 31st, 2017 at 12:48 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 3:15 PM ^
Take the one on the left down. Take the one on the right up.
August 31st, 2017 at 3:44 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 12:24 PM ^
I'm guessing the elevator on the right requires some sort of physical challenge or test of character to enter, then goes to your floor with an enthusiasm (and speed) unknown to mankind.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:31 PM ^
Whereas the one on the left is full of cold pizza.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:42 PM ^
The elevator on the right shouldn't be an elevator at all. It should be an escalator that is perpetually out of service, forcing everyone at FS1 to earn every step.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:57 PM ^
Opens to a flight of stairs. Real men walk, they dont ride some candy-ass elevator to where they need to go.
August 31st, 2017 at 2:26 PM ^
Yes, and it's timed. If you don't do it 1% faster than you did the day before, a chute drops you back down to the lower floor to do it again.
August 31st, 2017 at 3:01 PM ^
So basically real life Chutes and Ladders. I like it. And it will probably fire a few footballs your way to make things even more interesting.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:33 PM ^
accelerates to 25 gs.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:25 PM ^
Urban doesn't have a very good stank face
August 31st, 2017 at 12:26 PM ^
He is one smug sonofabitch. A very punchable face.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:32 PM ^
It's anatomically impossible to have a stank face without a chin.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:27 PM ^
August 31st, 2017 at 12:34 PM ^
His face is on the stairs. He doesn't even rate an escalator. Franklin and Ferentz got the escalators.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:38 PM ^
and it should be painted pink.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:34 PM ^
That would be the rusty fire escape out back. Leads directly to the dumpster filled alley also known as east lansing.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:52 PM ^
watch out though, because those dumpsters are all on fire
August 31st, 2017 at 12:34 PM ^
To the basement...and you can only access it from floors 3-9.
August 31st, 2017 at 12:34 PM ^
Mork will need it after this year.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:05 PM ^
Missing the swirling scraps of paper and Quality Dairy cups.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:32 PM ^
It's missing the passed-out MSU undergrad at the foot of the stairs, lying in a pool of his own urine and/or vomit...
August 31st, 2017 at 1:35 PM ^
minus the urine a few nights in South Quad in 1979 to 1980.
August 31st, 2017 at 1:43 PM ^
You can't really dust for urine or vomit - it could be someone else's urine or vomit.
#RememberStumpyJoe