OT:The bisexual Buckeye...a call for removal.
Seems that some Ohioans are a little alarmed that their beloved Buckeye has both male and bisexual characteristics and has urged a letter writing campaign to have it removed.
SO WHAT ABOUT CARNATIONS?
Something in the "Just Ask" column (Page A3, May 29) disturbed me. According to the column, "the Ohio buckeye, Aesculus glabra, bears flowers with both male and female organs on the same tree. It is a monoecious species."
I couldn't believe this, so I did some research and, sure enough, a science website (forestry.about.com) states that "the Ohio buckeye is polygamo-monoecious, bearing both bisexual and male flowers."
The buckeye is our state tree and most of us gladly wear the nickname, "buckeyes." But it is shameful and unacceptable that a bisexual tree should represent us! We are flaunting the Holy Bible!
I urge everyone to contact their state representative and demand legislation removing the buckeye as our state tree and condemning the use of the term "buckeye" as a nickname for residents of Ohio.
Does anyone know if carnations are bisexual?
http://www.thecourier.com/opinion/2012/Jun/06/ar_let_060612.asp?d=060612,2012,Jun,06&c=let
is about as ridiculous as it gets...
yes, they showed it during breaks at a number of UM football games last fall.
I hate to bring up religion, but nothing pisses off Sweet Baby Jesus more than a damned bisexual ass hermaphrodidic lilly ass tree. That's just science. Can't argue with science.
I posted more so that I could upvote this. Tremendous.
More like 100% chance it was meant as a joke. Even if someone took every other part of the article seriously, the "carnations" line at the end should have been a tip off.
Seems like he signed his real name for his joke and he also loves supporting research at GWU:
http://www.gwu.edu/~ccps/new_endorsers.html
Real men cry.
Ohio's licentious idol tree will earn them a one way pass to Beelzebub's flea circus for the damned.
Step 1. Search Google News for anything with "Ohio" in the article
Step 2. Post it on mgoblog with some sweeping generalizations, and somehow tie to Tressel and/or Pryor
Step 3. PROFIT!
3. ???
4. PROFIT!
It has wood jokes written all over it.
the wrong tree.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that you both need to stick to your day jobs...
hammocks for a living leafs me with a lot of free time.
#madeintheshade
Leaf jokes mikght be going against the grain. Then again, we have to branch out or we'll end up board.
article is a plant.
I figured you all wood branch out, but you should really just stick to your roots.
and get out of here!
go with the phloem.
This guy can't be serious.
Tee shirt - Buckeyes are bisexual.
Go back to Alabama
you mean to tell me a shirt like that wouldn't go over very well in Ann Arbor!?!?!?!?!?
/shocked
Hermaphroditic? This is beyond absurd but somehow entertaining because I know a few Buckeye fans that would be really bothered by this. Will they have to drop the "our nuts won't crack" cheer? "Our ambiguous sexual organs won't, oh nevermind".
Reproduction and Early Growth
Flowering and Fruiting- Ohio buckeye is polygamo-monoecious, bearing both bisexual and male flowers. The pale greenish-yellow flowers appear after the leaves in the spring from March to May and are borne in upright branched clusters. Only those near the base of the branches of a cluster are perfect and fertile; the others are staminate (4,11). The fruit is a leathery capsule containing one, two, or three seeds. The ripe seed is dark chocolate to chestnut brown, smooth and shiny, with a large, light-colored hilum so that it resembles an eye. 'The cotyledons are very thick and fleshy and contain no endosperm.
In the section titled "Competition", the trees "prosper in dense stands"....Sounds like "The Horseshoe" to me.
I always had a feeling some Buckeye fans only had one nut in their leathery capsule! This is just too much fun.
The Buckeye itself contains high levels of tannic acid, which could cause gastroenteritis if ingested in high doses, probably a lot like swallowing Skoal.
You don't know how appropriate this is. I'd say half the guys I work with rub snuff or chew tobacco. Their idea of recycling is using old pop cans/bottles as spittoons.
I didn't know either until just now; "bisexual" is the right word. The meaning we normally think of--attracted to both males and females--is just one definition. It can also mean "having both male and female sex organs." Yay internet.
and my wife had saved the article from the local newspaper.
Funny stuff overall.
BTW the walleye aren;'t really biting, but we did manage to reel this bad boy in!
Bad boy? He looks fine to me. Did he come with the fish too, or did you catch the fish separately?
The Buckeyes CAN go fuck themselves.
^ Pretty sure that's all we should take from this article. Well done.
tosu Carnations?
Yes.
tosu Pink Carnations.
It wood be enough to make Stanford's tree green with envy.
I have no idea if carnations are bixsexual, but a green carnation worn as boutonnière can be a signal of homosexuality (via wikipedia).
Although, to be honest, I can't imagine that many Buckeyes are in the habit of wearing dinner jackets.
Bisexual trees are NOT really bisexual. They are just confused, or seeking attention. These trees should learn to get a life and stop flouting their sexuality all over town! Noone wants to see two bisexual trees holding branches or embracing in public! God obviously thinks that bisexuality and homosexuality is a sin, that's why you NEVER see things like lesbian Seagulls. These trees should either start to read the Bible or be turned into Bibles!
(If you haven't figured it out by now, this is sarcasm...)
This guy attributes the same factual integrity to the Bible as he does to about.com.