Harbaugh-Manning Family Cage Match
December 6th, 2017 at 10:22 AM ^
I could see Archie being a bit of a scrapper.
The Harbaugh would all go full crazy in a fight. It's not even a competition.
Edit: This guy would have a tough time taking me down, let along Jim MF Harbaugh...
Besides, they are lovers not fighters...
December 6th, 2017 at 10:22 AM ^
joanie and jackie could probably take eli / peyton
December 6th, 2017 at 10:26 AM ^
You'll get there.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:50 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 8:27 PM ^
he wanted to be on a different team and wouldn't fight for Team Manning
December 6th, 2017 at 10:11 AM ^
I might give the edge to Archie if he is going up against Jack but there is noooooo way peyton and Eli could take Jim and John!
December 6th, 2017 at 10:14 AM ^
Peyton and Eli couldn't take Jim or John.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:19 AM ^
and just look at him. No contest - Harbaughs FTW!
December 6th, 2017 at 11:53 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 10:53 AM ^
Peyton would be JUST ABOUT to win, and Charles Woodson would come out of nowhere and take it away from him.
To soon?
December 6th, 2017 at 10:59 AM ^
But if you tried this joke at VolGoBlog, you'd be negged to Canada, or something.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:17 AM ^
I think Jack takes Archie easily. Jack is younger than his years, and Archie would be too busy watching over Peyton and Eli to notice the ass-kicking headed his way.
John surprisingly takes on Peyton* and after he pins Peyton punches Peyton in the taint, saying "don't EVER put that shit on anyone's face other than Phil Fulmer's or that Papa John asshole's face again!"**
Jim would end up dominating Eli too. At first with a couple of slaps upside the head, but ultimately with Eli turtling and Harbaugh imposing a fourth-degree wet willie on Eli.
Make this happen.
*You'd think that Jim would pair up with Peyton, but John wins a coin toss and chooses Peyton - the douchiest of Mannings - to pummel.
**Since Fulmer and Schnatter would welcome it, it's not sexual assault. Instead, it's simply what they collectively call "alone time".
December 6th, 2017 at 10:18 AM ^
This is entirely too detailed. And it's friggen' AWESOME!!!
December 6th, 2017 at 10:22 AM ^
Let's get the ADs involved. Warde would totally kick Fulmer's wrinkly old ass. If we get Ole Miss involved, then Ross Bjork is going down like the singer Bjork.
December 6th, 2017 at 11:52 AM ^
The U-M team could dominate but he'd still vote them #4.
December 6th, 2017 at 11:01 AM ^
One good punch to the neck and he'd be a cripple for life. Too harsh?
December 6th, 2017 at 11:42 AM ^
and not a taint, because no one could ever decide if Bob Guccione was more of a d*ck or more of an a**hole:
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=taint
December 6th, 2017 at 10:13 AM ^
as the type of guy who would try to punch Jack in the face.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:16 AM ^
Doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who knows how to throw a punch.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:17 AM ^
just figured he would want to brag about "beating up a Harbaugh" and then praying he didn't have to say which one it was.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:18 AM ^
Maybe. Also, I believe he shoud've punched McAdoo.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:21 AM ^
argue with that logic, you lose your consecutive games started streak because your coach is an idiot. He most definitely should have punched him, if not for that, then for McAdoo's general appearance. Quit trying to be Belichek, you look obnoxious wearing an ill-fitting suit with a whole jar of pomade on your head.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:25 AM ^
Right? Apparently he has no one in his life to talk him out of really bad ideas. My wife and daughter would've never let me look like that or bench Eli.
December 6th, 2017 at 12:26 PM ^
Then it'd turn out it was his gay son James who Eli suckerpunched before Eli got beat unconscious by him.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:17 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 10:19 AM ^
Maybe if he leads with that giant forehead until everyone else breaks their hands.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:17 AM ^
I can't stand Boomer, though I will say, I haven't listened since Craig Carton got hauled off to jail.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:18 AM ^
would try to jump in, but nobody in the match would know who he was, so the ref would toss him out.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:18 AM ^
Sadly, it would be the Mannings who would win. Peyton would launch one single headbutt, and take out the entire Harbaugh clan...
December 6th, 2017 at 10:20 AM ^
That. Is. Magnificent.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:53 AM ^
The long-lost Manning brother Dan would need to be accounted for...
December 6th, 2017 at 11:02 AM ^
I see it playing out Hancock style. Jim walks up to Peyton and says in a calm voice "when they gave Charles Woodson the 1997 Heisman, I can understand you feeling some kind of way about that. And we're gonna do this thing, but if any Manning so much as breathes on Jack I will put your head up both Eli's and Archie's ass - at the same time." Eli pushes Jack out of his way.
And we know what happens next:
December 6th, 2017 at 11:10 AM ^
You're putting a lot of thought into this today. I, for one, appreciate it.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:19 AM ^
is Peyton still using HGH?
December 6th, 2017 at 10:19 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 10:22 AM ^
Welp. That's gonna be stuck in my head all day. Thanks.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:19 AM ^
I don't see any way in hell how the Manning's could win this fight. No way...
December 6th, 2017 at 10:25 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 10:28 AM ^
Not if there are any female trainers in the building.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:39 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 10:47 AM ^
Someone do Lord Schembechler's work and find a link to this. +100 MGoFakePoints reward.
December 6th, 2017 at 10:48 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 11:10 AM ^
December 6th, 2017 at 12:12 PM ^
And by "executive search committee" you mean Phat Phil Fulmer...