Has anyone intentionally toned down their fanhood in order to improve their well being/mental health?
Sorry in advance for what I'm sure is one of the more laughably depressing threads we've had after a loss, but it's a serious question. Mods if this is just too much, kill it. I was talking with a guy yesterday who intentionally stopped being a sports fan because it was too much stress and too distressing for him. I'm a generally happy person, but after a loss like that I can be depressed for days, and to be perfectly honest I feel like it might just be healthier for me to tune out a little bit. Much as I love Michigan and football, the fact that one of the biggest causes of distress in my life is sports is just not healthy.
Thoughts? Talk me off the ledge?
October 13th, 2013 at 1:35 PM ^
I still watch the games, comment here every now and then, but I have also been detached for the past four years or so. I have got to where I feel, if they win, great; if they lose, I 'm not surprised, and not all that disappointed. I hope to re-gain the fanatic nature of my fandom one day, but I just cannot afford to right now.
October 13th, 2013 at 1:37 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:38 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:42 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:40 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:39 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:40 PM ^
I've never had to do that. I just have a magical ability to move on from things like this. Tough to watch, and it's furiating, but I'm not all butt hurt about it today. I'm as big of a fan as anybody I know, but if the team doesn't do well it won't ruin my day/week/life.
October 13th, 2013 at 1:42 PM ^
I need to dial it back, too.
October 13th, 2013 at 1:47 PM ^
Since leaving 3rds(where I could blog and MS Paint) and becoming dad my Michigan rage has taken a hit. I hung on every play of the 90s-RR era but the last few years I've toned it back and now have a 7-3 shift that keeps me from obsessing every second of my day about it. There is no doubt I was in a funk after last night. My mind ran wild with how far away we are and how I thought we were so close before the season. Does Hoke have any idea how to managed a team in crunch time(No time outs before the play clock, spiking a ball on a dead clock ect)? Is Hoke really in charge of anything? But I recover faster. I already feel better today.
October 13th, 2013 at 1:47 PM ^
Yes. Well, I never thought of it as a mental health issue or anything, but if Michigan isn't good, I become less interested in the sport overall (though still interested in Michigan). During our long basketball drought I pretty much ignored the NCAA Tournament - it wasn't interesting to me when Michigan wasn't in it. The two bowl-less years, I likewise didn't watch much.
I'll still watch Michigan no matter what - my interest in them doesn't change. I might not devour every scrap of information about them if they aren't playing well, though.
October 13th, 2013 at 1:48 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:48 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:48 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 1:49 PM ^
I'm a way too competitive person. I was 3 sport athlete in high school, and am the youngest of 4 in a family of athletes (all my siblings were amazing athletes, including the oldest who got a full ride to ND in basketball and was a captain there). My dad promoted an atmosphere of competition between us, so I've been programmed not to accept losing. Now as an adult, this has somehow transformed into me being "that guy" who screams and curses at the tv, paces, pounds tables/couch cushions, and slams doors all due to Michigan sports.
But now I'm a new father (to a 6 week old little girl), so I'm slowly trying to numb myself to tough part of being a sports fan. So while I am not trying to completely detach myself from loving sports, I am making a move to at least acting like an adult and not an immature little kid throwing a tantrum when things don't go U of M's way. With a baby around who's going to learn from my actions, I know how I react to these games is absolutely unacceptable. Last night was really tough to keep completely composed after that disgrace as a game, but one step at a time.
October 13th, 2013 at 1:53 PM ^
games that Michigan is clearly outmatched (Alabama) i can sit back, watch and hope that they put up a fight. the loss doesn't bother as much if any. Games like yesterday when they should have and had chances to win are the games that crush my spirits.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:01 PM ^
Squandering two whole OT periods on the most useless play in the book on that particular night. Telegraphing runs on each and every single first down. Delay of game and using the timeout for no reason two plays later. Inexplicably, and consistently, rushing 3 on 3rd and longs. Sometimes 3 men worked but usually it resulted in a conversion.
Did I mention we like to run left?
Still using the NFL punting formation. Abandoning the pass, the only way we were moving the ball, in OT. RUN THE TWO MINUTE DRILL IF YOU HAVE TO! UNLESS THROWS TO THE FLAT ARE TOO PEDESTRIAN FOR YOU?
Until Borges is fired, I will not watch another down of this team. This game was too much idiocy for me and I need my Saturdays for important things, like learning very difficult biochemistry-related material. Funk also deserves to be fired. Reading about the game is OK - I can do that on my own time and get the picture just as accurately that way.
I never thought I'd see the day where the Cleveland Browns would give me more hope than the Michigan Wolverines as to the direction of the program, building a roster, and general competence. But it has come to that. They can win with Brandon Weeden at QB, and I'm looking forward to beating up the Steelers this year.
In conclusion: No one is forcing you to run power with a green OL. Short throws do not compromise one's manhood.
October 13th, 2013 at 1:55 PM ^
I was ticked off after the game for all the obvious reasons, but then I went out and had a good night and a good morning after having a mini-epiphany. Which is...the long run of success for Michigan from 1970-2000 or so not only spoiled us in the obvious way of having high expectations...but convinced us that Michigan winning was part of OUR identity as people. This is dangerous.
I don't think there's anything wrong with believing that your fandom for a team associates you with certain traditions or ideals. In Michigan's case this would mean celebrating the communal atmosphere in Ann Arbor and at the stadium, placing importance on academics and character and involvement in the community, respecting the players/coaches of the past, even taking pride in certain aspects of the way the team plays the game (defense that stops the run, etc.).
But, and here's the thing...you can celebrate all those things if the team goes 6-6 just as well as you can if it goes 12-0. And where a lot of us have kind of gone wrong I think is in having decided that the 12-0, the winning, is the most important part of the ideals/traditions/etc. Which is, ironically, a losing game. No one can be perpetually successful — and those that come the closest often do so by making sacrifices that a lot of us would be uncomfortable with. Alabama breaks its word to high school kids and bullies weaker players into acceting "medical hardship" rulings. Ohio looks the other way on, well, everything. All sorts of programs let their players drop out or fake their way into graduating despite being borderline illiterate.
Of course, even cutting corners like this doesn't guarantee winning. Look at Notre Dame, whose coach, in my opinion, humiliates himself and his institution on national television on a weekly basis — and still doesn't win. Look at USC. Look at what happened to Penn State!
While far, far, far from perfect, Michigan _generally_ walks the walk as far as maintaining a set of central values. That's a good thing. And in the long-term it's the best way to "sustainably" have a program that people want to associate themselves with. But it also probably means having teams that are slightly thinner on talent than OSU or Alabama, or having a coach who represents the program well but occasionally bones up a few decisions. Bill O'Brien and Urban Meyer look great right now, for example. But there's also a good chance that two years from now Bill O'Brien is coaching the Buccaneers and Urban Meyer has decided during the third quarter of a game against Purdue to retire, unretire, and then take the head coach job at Texas.
So, you know, point is — winning is nice. And it's fine to have high ambitions, hold yourself to high standards, want to win the Big Ten every year. But if that's the ONLY thing you care about, you might be fine for a while, but you are eventually going to end up pissed-off and let down.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:58 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 4:10 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:10 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:33 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:18 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:34 PM ^
I agree with every word.
I can recall being upset for DAYS after losing to MSU or especially OSU.
Then one day it hit me. My life does not change one iota regardless if Michigan loses or wins.
Those players dont know me and dont give a rats ass about the fans. (nor should they)
Its just a game played by a bunch of kids against another bunch of kids. Simple as that.
I will continue to watch. I still love my Michigan football.
But after the game, win or lose, life marches on.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:21 PM ^
In the past I'd never have even considered watching the games on tape delay on TiVo. This year I will watch at least three games that way. Honestly watching the penn state game on tivo yesterday was much more tolerable than it would've been watching in real time.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:26 PM ^
I guess I would be in the camp with those who are saying that it does get a little easier to process and store as you get older. I am not really that old, of course - 35 - but I am much better about muting my frustration and finding ways to express it that don't involve, for example, shouting at a television that never did anything other than what its innerds allow it do - broadcast a game. I found that the more I was able to do this through the years, the quality of my own fandom - as I see it anyway - improved, or at least became a bit more three-dimensional and not tied to the score per se. Having a wife and two kids helps keep me distracted too.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:26 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:30 PM ^
I dont let it affect me afterwards as much as it used to but during games its very frustrating to watch.
What I have done is stop spending money on Michigan football because this AD and staff is so frustrating. I've gone from season tix to ticket packs to single game to none this year. I dont like the AD and this coaching staff is book smart, not street smart. Maybe they can game plan excellently and maybe they know football very well, but once the game starts they either got it right or didn't. Whats that quote, something like the best plans fall apart once the first shot is fired? I wouldn't go to battle with Borges.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:33 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:36 PM ^
I am still a hardcore Michigan fan...but a VERY rational one with a multi-season view point...hopefully this will be a season of improvement and preparation for bigger things. We will lose a few in the season...but hopefully win a bowl game to give the off-season a good taste. Go Blue.
2014 is the year? ... and 2015 too?
October 13th, 2013 at 2:38 PM ^
I'm in the same place right now. That game was just a bummer on so many levels, and right now I just have too much going on in my life to get this upset about something I can't control. I have to take the next couple weeks off from watching, and I might just take a break from the season, at least until things look up.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:43 PM ^
and it was one of the most enjoyable games I've attended in recent years. Then came the Akron-UConn stumbles and the MN mediocrity. Doubt replaced hope as to how this team would fare going forward. It was almost as if all the near-misses and underwhelming play (especially on offense) would soon lead to a major disaster. Well, they did. One of the more interesting aspects of this season has been to watch how the coaches have adapted their offensive and defensive strategies to their available personnel. In that regard, I read with interest TTB's assertion that the coaches "had lost confidence" in Devin Gardner's passing. That was apparently the reason why we saw so many fruitless running attempts in OT. Well, put this one behind us and await the Hoosiers. I look for a better effort this Saturday, but I harbor no illusions about the team or the season. I'll take seven or eight wins and say given the O-line problems, an erratic QB and a young but improving defense, that'll be about right.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:47 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:49 PM ^
My name is Maize MN. I'm a MGobaseball-basketball-hockey-football-softball-holic, win or lose. And not the least bit apologetic about it. I'd root for the checkers team if we had one. GO BLUE!
October 13th, 2013 at 2:49 PM ^
I have high blood pressure as a result from these games.
Tone down my fanhood? Yeah not gonna happen.
Record book I made
I've been calling all around town this week to stores and drove all the way across town this morning to pick this up-
October 13th, 2013 at 2:57 PM ^
...are my hero. I wanna be like you when I grow up. EDIT: Seriously, if I send you the money, can you get me one of the Jello kits? I don't think we'll have them in MN.
October 13th, 2013 at 3:02 PM ^
- I skipped my Sophomore homecoming with my girlfriend to watch Michigan at state (2011 game unfortunately). I was dumped a week later. That kind of played a part in it.
- I'm skipping my Senior homecoming Saturday to watch Michigan vs indiana (please be a better result)
- I follow the same game week, eve of game and gameday rituals.
- My HS yearbook will be featuring me and my room in the personalites section. I do not like the attention but I would like to spread pictures of the room around. Not me. No man is more important than the team.
You don't want to be like me.
October 13th, 2013 at 3:18 PM ^
I am you, In the future. (minus the prom thing)
October 13th, 2013 at 4:07 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:54 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 3:03 PM ^
18 actually.
October 13th, 2013 at 2:51 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 2:58 PM ^
Yes I'm backing off. I don't see things getting better anytime soon. Outside of a defense that's more solid, this team isn't much better then when Hoke took over. The offense is inept. The soft zone defense, that I despised under Herrmann is back.
DB has tied his star to Hoke, he will never get rid of him. If he did, he would have to admit he made a mistake in hiring him. His ego would never allow that. Hoke will never fire coaches, that have been with him from previous stops. I'm resigned to the fact that Michigan is what it is... a mediocre program living on past glory. The phrase, "This is Michigan fergodsakes"... well, that rings rather hollow.
October 13th, 2013 at 3:12 PM ^
Hoke will never fire coaches, that have been with him from previous stops.Where do people get this stuff from? Hoke did, in fact, shake up his coaching staff at Ball State a few times, and that was a reason why the program improved so much his last couple of years there.
October 13th, 2013 at 3:00 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 3:06 PM ^
Yeah, probably. Just more of a realist, outwardly, to the world. Trying not to take it so personally, which I tend to do. Practicing those innocuous remarks like, "Oh well, it's just a game." "We'll get 'em next time!" "Congratulations to the other team- what a hard-fought game!"
October 13th, 2013 at 3:15 PM ^
Yes. I have basically cut back on all sports watching except UM football, a little bit of the Lions, and some UFC events.
It's distressing the state the team is in, and it does bother me. I hate seeing Ohio do so well, the Toledo-stealers need to be put back in their place. But a while back I decided to put sports further down the priority list. I've got other things to do.
October 13th, 2013 at 3:17 PM ^
that these are 18-22 year old kids out there and that it is crazy to make my mood contingent on what they do. I was way too invested in the Carr years to where it would ruin my weekend when they played lousy. App State cured me. Now I can enjoy the wins and sort of laugh off the nonsense like yesterday. This team is going to lose at least 3 more games this season.
October 13th, 2013 at 3:21 PM ^
October 13th, 2013 at 3:24 PM ^