New front page tagline?
January 20th, 2022 at 8:49 AM ^
I try not to speculate, but I want everyone to know who is reading this that there are people out there that do care about you, and there are people out there who are more than willing to listen to you. Even if this is extremely off-base, take care of yourselves both physically and mentally.
January 20th, 2022 at 9:11 AM ^
"Even if this is extremely off-base"
Taking care of yourself is never off base. And caring for the people around you is never off base either. Thanks NFG.
January 20th, 2022 at 9:43 AM ^
Agreed. IMO, it's never OT about mental health. Thanks to NFG and Robbie
January 20th, 2022 at 9:14 AM ^
One thing we all have in common is that the past lock downs and limited ability to head into an office and just chat with people has left us isolated. The people who will listen to you are likely experiencing these same feelings. Or maybe you're the one that reaches out and talks with someone that is struggling. Just saying 'hi' to someone at the grocery store and seeing a maskless smile has helped me.
January 20th, 2022 at 11:47 AM ^
This is all very real. I'm the furthest thing from alone. I have a happy marriage, 2 great kids that are a lot of fun and still young enough that they are totally dependent on my wife and I for everything but entertaining themselves. I love driving them to their sports, etc. Objectively speaking, I live a wonderful life.
But, in harder moments these last couple years, the range of emotions I have encountered on occasion includes one that can only be described as "alone". It can be a tougher one to chase away.
"Guilt" and "regret" are two others that pop up from time to time, when I've lived a life, especially the last 15 years or so, that doesn't include many choices or experiences at all that would produce feelings of guilt or regret.
Two Years to Flatten the Curve... has also flattened a lot of people's mental and emotional stability.
January 20th, 2022 at 1:41 PM ^
I've had the opposite experience. I realized that I'm an introvert who was being forced to be an extrovert bc of my occupation. I didn't realize the energy it took to play extrovert everyday. Lockdowns and working from home has been great for me. I don't miss the daily forced conversations about the weather or how little Timmy's soccer game went.
January 20th, 2022 at 2:43 PM ^
This, exactly. I don't miss my office environment at all. It was exhausting being forced to interact with others on terms that completely drained me every day. I fear going back to the office and wish I could carve out an introvert island that allowed me to avoid frequent interactions.
January 20th, 2022 at 3:43 PM ^
Be candid, the problem with the office is it doesn’t let you live out your avatar name.
January 20th, 2022 at 8:49 AM ^
You missed it
M
January 20th, 2022 at 8:50 AM ^
It’s from the Schlissel email dump. He sent his paramour an email that just read “lonely -m”
January 20th, 2022 at 8:58 AM ^
Thank you for explaining. I was genuinely worried about someone on the Mgostaff there for a minute
January 20th, 2022 at 9:00 AM ^
The kids are alright 
January 20th, 2022 at 9:13 AM ^
This is amazing.
January 20th, 2022 at 11:49 AM ^
lonely is the night
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C5TaeDhPUQQq
January 20th, 2022 at 9:14 AM ^
The use of the word paramour made me chuckle.
Also made me think of Paramore. Hayley Williams is awesome.
January 20th, 2022 at 9:47 AM ^
Ain't it fun living in the real world?
January 20th, 2022 at 10:35 AM ^
So now do we extend our concern to Schlissel?
January 20th, 2022 at 8:50 AM ^
It was from Schlissel’s emails that were released. It’s become the default way to mock/say you disapprove of him
January 20th, 2022 at 10:31 AM ^
I think it's more nuanced than that, but I could be wrong. It's an acknowledgement of truth from the students to the president: "we're overjoyed to see you go but also feel this specific thing out of your enormous public shaming on a visceral level." It's like a smug little wave goodbye, very on-brand Michigan humor with definite Mr Brightside vibes.
but maybe i'm just reading too much into this.
January 21st, 2022 at 11:22 AM ^
It's the new "OK Cool. Hook 'em."
January 20th, 2022 at 8:55 AM ^
love can come
at any time in life
and it's beautiful
and joyous
whenever it does.
- m
January 20th, 2022 at 9:03 AM ^
OP’s post summarized:
confused
m
January 20th, 2022 at 9:06 AM ^
Just another prime example that all the money and prestige in the world can't buy happiness!
January 20th, 2022 at 10:28 AM ^
Fits with my avatar...
January 20th, 2022 at 9:18 AM ^
Whenever I see Mark Zuckerburg's picture I wonder just how miserable he is. Or Bill Gates hanging with Jeffrey Epstein...what kind of void was he trying to fill? Seems that money and prestige do not overcome internal doubt but rather enhance it.
As for Schlissel, it strikes me that he is a brilliant science guy who is socially awkward. I'm sure we all know the type. And career accomplishment and money have not transported him to a place where he is cool. Never was and never will be cool. And those emails are just sad. He wants so badly to have a "real" relationship with an attractive female and just comes across as needy and pathetic. I do not feel badly in the least that he lost his job over his behavior. I do feel badly that he had to be publicly humiliated but so it goes. Brought it on himself.
January 20th, 2022 at 9:22 AM ^
Here is my theory: Virtually everyone that reaches a very high level of success is full of anxiety and self-doubt. If they don't, they're a narcissist and/or a sociopath and are REALLY dangerous.
January 20th, 2022 at 9:58 AM ^
Actually? Your theory is inaccurate. Most .1% percenters are simply more focused and pretty much able to relax, be "normal", and be happy with and in life. Decent people.
The ones who are either insecure enough to crave or unfortunate enough to be in the public eye? They can be fairly unstable and volatile. The egos with those can get obnoxious. Think nouveaux riche plus immaturity plus insecurity: that's the recipe for bad behavior.
January 20th, 2022 at 10:08 AM ^
What's your evidence? I know vaguely about the literature on the connection between people in leadership positions and psychopathy (for example, CEOs are about 3.5X more likely to exhibit psychopathic characteristics than those in the general population), but have never read any research saying these people tend to be "more relaxed, normal and happy with and in life." A citation would be nice.
January 20th, 2022 at 10:14 AM ^
You want me to cite a published study? Nope, haven't got one of those. I'm just recounting what my family and I have observed across many decades of working with and knowing some of the world's wealthiest people.
January 20th, 2022 at 11:05 AM ^
Instead of being a smart ass and saying something about the dangers of anecdotal evidence, let me just say that you should look at the research and empirical evidence. It's pretty fascinating.
Anecdotally, to give a recent example, look at the CEO of Better.com, who decided it was a good idea to fire 900 people a few weeks before Christmas on a group Zoom call. If we think of psychopathy's core characteristics - lack of empathy, disregard for others, narcissism, etc. - I can't think of a better recent example supporting my theory. If you watch that video, it is really quite stunning. At one point, he actually tries to make it all about himself and his own emotional turmoil, saying something like, "last time I did this, I cried. I will try not to cry this time." Psychopaths think only they have an inner emotional life, and that others are devoid of such complex, deeper feelings. And yet, he is back in charge of the company as of this week...
January 20th, 2022 at 11:19 AM ^
He is an employee and not someone who would ever be on my radar and not simply because he's an impulsively miserable person.
I am talking about original owners of private enterprises they have grown over the decades or large minority holders of companies taken public. These are the zero point 1 percenters. These are not people you would know or have heard about typically.
Your personal theory was that "virtually everyone that reaches a very high level of success is full of anxiety and self-doubt". I can only observe that your theory about "virtually everyone" does not hold according to my observations.
I recognize that my observations do not fit the narrative about the arrogant rich that is commonly held. Sorry about that but I am recounting my genuine obsevations about the privately wealthy.
No further posts will be made on this topic. I don't want to distract any more than I already have.
January 20th, 2022 at 4:14 PM ^
Vishal Garg is the co-founder and CEO of Better.com, a company planning to go public in 2022 through an SPAC. His net worth is an estimated $4B, about 100 times more than the 0.1% threshold. That is precisely the type of individual you describe in your post.
If you are going to troll, at least don't be an idiot.
January 20th, 2022 at 1:13 PM ^
Recently read “The Sociopath Next Door” by Martha Stout, PhD and her work certainly supports your view. Quite unnerving to be reading the characteristics she presents and then recognize them in a neighbor, co-worker, etc. She theorizes that 4% of the population have this lack of conscience.
Edit: In reference to FauxMo’s comments.
January 20th, 2022 at 3:51 PM ^
I’ll just add that when a genocidal clown tells you about being a psychopath, you just might want to listen.
January 20th, 2022 at 1:04 PM ^
I think it's an error to describe a wide (albeit not that numerous) group of high-achievers with any one characteristic. There are, indeed, a number of different ways to get to that point, but the "luck" factor that can distinguish between successful, smart, hard-working and uber-successful as well as smart and hard-working means that there are people with various different constructions arriving at vaguely similar levels of power and wealth.
I certainly believe that those levels of success are not enough to satisfy or fulfill someone, and so when you have achieved a high enough level of success that you should theoretically be fulfilled and aren't, it can be tough to deal with that. But different people cope differently.
January 20th, 2022 at 9:37 AM ^
I saw an interview with Howard Cosell years and years ago and he talked about how having a lot of money made him more insecure, not less. He attributed it to the Great Depression and how his family struggled through it and it left him with a sense that no amount of money would ever be enough to make him feel financially secure. I think the super wealthy experience the same thing minus the Depression as motive. Is it ever enough? There's always going to be guys making more money so there's pressure to keep up and surpass. The more you have, the more you want. It's a slippery slope.
January 20th, 2022 at 10:41 AM ^
There's nothing wrong with being socially awkward, and it is probably a not inaccurate descriptor of half this forum, myself definitely included.
The problem was that Schlissel was universally regarded as a condescending ass to everyone in his orbit, especially to people in the UM community he didn't have anything to gain from. And you gotta think that's at least part of the reason he got a burn notice from the BoR. Social awkwardness only goes so far as an 'excuse' for that.
January 20th, 2022 at 11:17 AM ^
Isn't the whole world lonely?
Go Blue.
January 20th, 2022 at 2:16 PM ^
A lot of what I came to this thread to say has been said, but I'll express thanks to this group for being a connection to the outside world through all of this. I have other online groups I am a part of, but only one comes close to this one.
Thanks to everyone, and my advice is to monitor your mental health closely and to take action when you feel you need to. This is a unique and far-reaching tragedy in our lives, and we need to lean on our friends for support. Do it.