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Date Title Body
10/16/2018 - 3:17pm Nah, Mahmoud A's…

Nah, Mahmoud A's prognostications on Michigan sports are way too positive to be Maizen

10/16/2018 - 2:59pm Considering the amount of…

Considering the amount of pork mixed in with other unmentionables in hot dogs... he's probably say no.

Side note:  most of my co-workers are Muslim, so it was kinda cool when a cold-calling product vendor brought in pepperoni pizzas for our office because it was more for me.

10/16/2018 - 2:56pm He always was better at…

He always was better at scoring when going to the right.

10/13/2018 - 10:59pm The only things I can…

The only things I can reasonably complain about are:

- Too many damn gadget plays when the base offense was doing just fine

- Patterson probably torched 2 of our 1st half drives by keeping the ball instead of living to fight another day

- I didn't save money by switching to GEICO

10/12/2018 - 2:05pm I hope you understand in all…

I hope you understand in all sincerity that this is a compliment, but if anything would make me get a Twitter account, it'd be so I could <3 that slam of Scott Paterno on the Twooters.

10/10/2018 - 11:25am In point of fact, my friend…

In point of fact, my friend was a post-doc history student at Michigan and she learned that Mark Dantonio's ancestor Igor d'Antonin gave Vlad the Impaler a carriage ride back to his castle after he slaughtered every man, woman and child in a nearby village. 

10/09/2018 - 3:27pm I don't think that Durkin…

I don't think that Durkin was saying Wangler would never play meaningful D1 snaps in a spiteful way; that's something most coaches would tell players that didn't feel were going to see the field to let them know where they stand. 

I don't think Durkin (Jabrill Peppers comments notwithstanding) was cross-the-line abusive as a DC during his year here; if he had been you can bet your bippy that Baumgartner, Chengelis and other beat writers would've (to their credit) been on the case and screamed it from the rooftops.  I'm sure he was intense and yelled a lot.  If this surprises you about football coaches, then it'll blow your mind to know that high-school age summer camp counselors sometimes sneak off into the woods to have sex.

I also don't think Durkin intentionally tanked the 2015 OSU game; that was Urban Meyer remembering he had Ezekiel Elliot and we didn't have Ryan Glasgow.

I do think that he did preside over an out-of-bounds culture at Maryland, and whether or not he actively created the conditions that led to Jordan McNair's death there's ample evidence that he tacitly fostered it and - right or wrong, the buck stops with him.

10/09/2018 - 3:01pm i must object to your…

i must object to your description of Durkin as a cunt, good sir - he has neither the requisite warmth nor depth

10/08/2018 - 9:56pm Thank you for your endless…

Thank you for your endless and conscientious hard work.  While we're all saddened that your health has forced this chapter of your life to come to a close, I think I speak for all of us in our certainty that someday, some way, you'll move on to even bigger and better things than Michigan sports (if indeed they exist)

10/08/2018 - 3:58pm Mods, delete this shit

Mods, delete this shit

10/08/2018 - 10:00am To imply that Baumgardner…

To imply that Baumgardner should be dismissed out of hand because he's an MSU grad is low-rent provincialism at its worst.

As a *factually* true, non-hypothetical counterexample:  when the Urban Meyer scandal was ablaze earlier this month, Nicole Auerbach appeared on BTN to give her thoughts, which was to read Meyer the riot act for lying through his teeth.  Bucknuts editor and Professional Cro-Magnon Dave Biddle questioned why BTN didn't mention that Auerbach happens to be a Michigan grad - essentially implying that she has an anti-OSU agenda.

(I mean, maybe she does - but not because she's a Michigan graduate but because she's a human being with a conscience and sense of right and wrong.)

If you're basing your dislike of Baumgardner's beat writing on him being an MSU grad, you're essentially being Dave Biddle.  Don't be Dave Biddle.

10/07/2018 - 5:15pm Anyone know where MGrowOld…

Anyone know where MGrowOld is?  Just want to make sure he's still conscious or still passed out from the euphoria of it all.

10/06/2018 - 5:13pm Good triumphed over evil in…

Good triumphed over evil in East Lansing.

Fitzgerald is the guy you want to beat in IM sports because he argues every call and over celebrates everything, but afterwards you exchange 'good games' and maybe share a beer.

Dantonio is the guy you want to beat in IM sports because he's a raging asshole who hangs out with members of the date-rapiest frat on campus.

10/06/2018 - 5:04pm My desire to read RCMB for…

My desire to read RCMB for schadenfreude is sadly less than my desire for my computer to not get the computer equivalent of genital warts.

10/01/2018 - 1:58pm When you consider that a…

When you consider that a black panther is a very large and agile kwity cat, Paye's sack celebration makes a lot of sense

09/29/2018 - 10:21pm We all complain about the…

We all complain about the toxicity of snowflake threads.... I wonder if we made a Snowflake - Refs thread, would it a) capture all the collective toxicity and keep it contained or b) create a critical mass of toxicity that devours the entire multiverse?

09/28/2018 - 3:11pm Of those, I've only been to…

Of those, I've only been to UW, I remember the campus being quite pretty but thinking that given its fantastic location it could be even more stunning than it is.

09/28/2018 - 1:34pm I'll try (but not too hard)…

I'll try (but not too hard) to let my withering contempt for MSU as an institution cloud my judgment, but... the upper right hand quadrant of its campus around where the bell tower is - it's picture perfect gorgeous.  The other 80% of campus?  Blander than Aunt Dorothy's mayo+potato casserole

09/27/2018 - 3:26pm I didn't want to step in…

I didn't want to step in something that wasn't my mess, but I've never been serially killed by FauxMo so I can unequivocably state that he isn't a serial killer clown.

09/27/2018 - 12:05pm ^^^^ exactly.

In a vacuum,…

^^^^ exactly.

In a vacuum, the promotional image is harmless.  It only takes on distasteful connotations if you think that OSU had any kind of culpability as far as (inhale) their most important employee having very strong reason to suspect that one of his charges was a domestic abuser and then firing him after the smoking gun became impossible to ignore and then, in response to an announced investigation, asking how to delete old text messages, which was acknowledged by said investigation which then said, of the aforementioned employee, "oopsie, nothing to see here. O! H!" ....but I digress.  As far as OSU is concerned, their hands are clean on this.  Outside of the 270 outerbelt, where people don't wear Buckeye necklaces to church and elect to defecate in fixtures by Kohler or American Standard instead of Coleman or Igloo Products, the thinking is decidedly different.

09/26/2018 - 3:54pm Gotta think that Gilbert has…

Gotta think that Gilbert has a Lebron-sized reason to sell the Cavs ASAP before the franchise's value goes down.

09/26/2018 - 12:30pm How did you get the original…

How did you get the original non-Photoshopped version of that pic of Brian?

09/25/2018 - 2:47pm The sad truth is that Hue or…

The sad truth is that Hue or no Hue, at the end of the day Jimmy Haslam is not going to fire himself and that's the change that needed to happen a long time ago.  Here's hoping that Baker and the rest of the young'uns can succeed in spite of the owner and People In Charge that he hired.

09/23/2018 - 9:10pm It might not have been…

It might not have been poltically correct for Metellus or Winovich to say that Nebraska pretty much quit but watching that game... were they wrong?  If I'm Nebraska, I'm less upset that the M players said that than about the fact that they weren't wrong.

09/23/2018 - 6:40pm Usually with a blowout it's…

Usually with a blowout it's that one team played above its heads and the other team fired blanks.  Sure the better team decisively won but they're probably not better than what the final score showed.

With this game... the 56-10 score undersold how much better we were than Nebraska - mind you, that's not a ringing endorsement of us but more an indictment on just how bad they are.

09/22/2018 - 5:55pm I'm sure it does, but a 56…

I'm sure it does, but a 56-10 smothering of parapalegic baby seals does not Muppets warrant.

09/22/2018 - 3:48pm I must take issue with your…

I must take issue with your passive denigration of Arena League practices.

09/22/2018 - 3:38pm FIRE THEM ALL, UTTERLY…

FIRE THEM ALL, UTTERLY PREDICTABLE SAME OL BULLSH...

/checks boxscore.

GO BLUE, WE'RE GONNA WIN A NATTY BOYS

09/21/2018 - 8:53pm UMD may have caused McNair's…

UMD may have caused McNair's death because of neglect, but it's not like they did anything truly heinous like paying him or his teammates for use of his likeness in branded merchandise or feeding him bagels *with* cream cheese.

09/20/2018 - 12:39pm On a lighter note, it's…

On a lighter note, it's kinda cute how Metellus is dating softball's Tera Blanco.  Now I'm imagining their coaches co-chaperoning their dates, with Hutch telling them to get pizza and Harbaugh insisting on steak and whole milk.

09/18/2018 - 4:08pm Hrm - from what I remember …

Hrm - from what I remember (this was early 90's fwiw), Stockwell's cafeteria was one of the better ones on central campus - mind you this is coming from someone who lived in East Quad so that mighta skewed my perceptions.

09/17/2018 - 4:18pm It's quite possible - based…

It's quite possible - based on empirical evidence - that a) we haven't seen half of this season's offensive playbook and b) we will continue to not be shown said half of playbook.

09/17/2018 - 1:43pm What's it going to take for…

What's it going to take for you to send some KGB insurgents into Columbus and make Meyer "disappear"? Only to re-appear 10-15 years from now in some Siberian gulag?

Columbus resident here.  Your request is actually probably easier than you think!  It's common and unspoken knowledge in these here parts that Russian organized crime families run some of the strip clubs around here, but doubtless our esteemed comrade Hotel Putingrad already knows this.

09/17/2018 - 1:31pm Far be it from me, a…

Far be it from me, a layperson, to say that Urban Meyer is a classic psycopath, but I daresay that his depth of knowledge on spread offense concepts and power run schemes rival's Patrick Bateman's insight on Huey Lewis and the News' music as a bellwether of late 80's zeitgeist

09/16/2018 - 6:43pm At some point, as a Browns…

At some point, as a Browns fan.... it don't hurt no more.

09/16/2018 - 1:37pm To put things in perspective…

To put things in perspective, at least Big Ten teams have reverted to embarrassing themselves ON the field as opposed to OFF the field, as was the case *checks calendar* all of 2018.

09/16/2018 - 1:02pm Herbstreit likely was…

Herbstreit likely was present, but you didn't see him since the camera frame cut off above the waist

09/16/2018 - 12:59pm At the risk of sounding…

At the risk of sounding judgmental about religious belief.... the last 20ish years of OSU football have, to put it mildly, SEVERELY tested my belief in karma.

09/09/2018 - 5:54pm If having Brenda Tracy is…

If having Brenda Tracy is perceived as a shot across the bow at MSU and OSU, maybe it's because both those schools should get their shit together when it comes to enabling sexual predators on campus

09/08/2018 - 8:02pm Yeah I'm looking at the…

Yeah I'm looking at the website now, it looks pretty damn good.  Best part is that it should be very hard to not come across one of those, especially in Medellin

09/08/2018 - 7:41pm I found out about this…

I found out about this hostel that's literally a floating structure in the middle of the Carribean and am gonna try and get in a night there.  I'd considered Rosario but will likely shelve it for (hopefully) a future visit - from everything I heard though, yeah you definitely don't want to just make it a day trip.

09/08/2018 - 5:55pm Definitely have two days…

Definitely have two days blocked out for Cartagena plus at least a half-day when I depart.  I'll be able to see Barranquilla and Santa Marta en route to Tayrona, I hadn't planned on seeing much of them but given that the bus system can be pokey I'll probably have some time to check those out. 

I'm actually Chinese-American so I'm probably gonna get offered opium instead.  :)

I'm also happily spoken for so I should be able to resist the allures of Colombian women. (famous last words!)

09/08/2018 - 5:28pm I'm a little bit more…

I'm a little bit more encouraged if only because the offense - while still a bludgeoning of a hopefully overmatched opponent - was entertaining to watch.  I don't expect a repeat performance when our tackles have to spot Nick Bosa but that's grist for another day.

btw, dude - regarding Colombia - I'm doing the first half with a tour company but the second week I'm poking around the Carribean coast around the Cartegena region.  Other planned pit stops for me include the town of Minca and Tayrona National Park.  Any other must-sees in that general area?

09/01/2018 - 4:44pm Eh... honestly, given the…

Eh... honestly, given the history of this series, I'd rather NOT be a narrow Vegas favorite.

08/31/2018 - 1:34pm I'm a little less optimistic…

I'm a little less optimistic - until proven otherwise, I'm not seeing how this offensive line doesn't surrender a critical mass of TFL's to submarine drives against a good defense.  I will be pleasantly surprised if we muster 2 offensive touchdowns and extremely surprised if we put up 3+

I'm confident in our defense's ability to keep us in the game but our all-out approach very likely means that the Irish will at some point roll double papers to our rock to get a few big plays - and until I *see* Patterson and gang showing a functional pass game that's probably enough for ND.

I want to believe, but I'm still predisposed to think we can't have nice things.  Ironically the few times in the past decade we've won games we didn't deserve to win, Saturday's opponent usually was involved. 

08/31/2018 - 12:37pm Urban Meyer mismanaged Zach…

Urban Meyer mismanaged Zach Smith the same way gravity mismanaged Zach Smith's testicles.

08/30/2018 - 3:00pm Given all available…

Given all available empirical evidence, can we assume that Mr. Wadsworth will soon have to flee Columbus to become a university trustee somewhere in Nashville?

08/30/2018 - 12:52pm I ate a bagel with cream…

I ate a bagel with cream cheese literally seconds before seeing this post.  Had I instead simply molested someone, that would've garnered me less scrutiny from the NCAA.

08/30/2018 - 10:19am Sound advice, but then again…

Sound advice, but then again anyone who says "I like Ohio State" probably wouldn't be within a country mile of a bathtub in the first place.

08/29/2018 - 4:40pm  

In retrospect.... asked…

ASKED.jpg

 

In retrospect.... asked and answered.