Time for a caption thread

WELCOME TO BIG TEN COACHING DIVERSITY DAYS!

buzz cuts over here, oily comb overs over there

I just hope I never have to sit next to him on an airplane, because you know he is getting the armrests for the whole flight.

Dantonio:  "I AM a douchebag."

Well said!  Made my day!!

Pelini- "Woah! Look at the cans on that 18 year old Luke brought here!"

2 things.....Hoke's got Tony Soprano hands, and the Zook one made me LOL

Paterno: "I can't wait to come back next year!  Nothing can stop me from coaching!"

"Hey Joe, is that story you were talking about earlier going to break before or after we play you?"

Pelini: My prostate needs to be checked?  Here Brett?
Bielema: Got ya hooked up, Bo.  Just keep breathing.

Fickell: Can Tress hook me up with the Colts?  Maybe be Andrew Luck's valet?

Indiana's coach: Only one of the bunch I didn't recognize...who knew?

Does anyone know if there is a higher resolution version of this picture?

Wilson - Is Indiana in the Big Ten?  

Bielma - I really hope we're ready for our non-conference schedule this year.

Pelini  - No thoughts.  The "man" in the photo is a Bo Pelini Real Doll. 

Hope - I don't even remember growing this mustache, but we were all so hopped up on disco and amyls*  in those days that no one really remembers anything.

Paterno (muttering) - "This should all be find as long as no one ever asks about..."

Ferentz - What the hell is Joe talking about?

Fitzgerald - Dantonio thinks I like him.  That's hilarious!

Dantonio - Take the picture now or I am going to snap your g-ddamn little neck.

Zook - Just smiling like this has got me a long way.

Fickell - They are going to fire me unless I can make it to the Rose Bowl with a freshman at QB and with my best RB, OT,and WR out for at least five games.

Kill - I just ate a possum.

Hoke - I have no injuries to report.

*Apologies to Arrested Development.

Bielma: *sniff* what is small?  Oh, man, I think somebody farted.  Who did that?  I'm gonna figure out who did that and kick his ass!  Was that you, Pelini?

Pelini: (don't react... act natural... just ignore him...)

Dantonio: :-)

 

Hoke: Hija, Jerry Kill.  First year on the job for you too, huh?

Kill: Yessir.  You're going to have it tough living up to expectations at Michigan.  I'm glad I'm coaching for a school where the fans are more laid back and reasonable!  I'll have plenty of time to build my program without having to deal with detractors.

 

Paterno: Zzzzz...

Ferentz: *pssst* Joe!  Wake up!  Picture time!

 

Wilson: Damnit, you guys told me we were all wearing our tan suits.  What the hell?

Fitzgerald: :-)

 

Zook: All right, I love picture day!  Smile for the camera... man, this seat is really warm.  What's up with that?

 

Fickell: I want my mommy.

Hope: I had yer mommy... she wasn't that great.   MUSTACHE RIDE!

especially for a boring Tuesday.  Here goes:

Wilson - Why do all of the other coaches keep asking me who I am and then laughing when I tell them that I am the new coach of Indiana?

Bielma - Man, an I taller than all of these other guys?  Yup, I am.  Cool.  Hey all of you down there. 

Pelini  -  Taking pictures pisses me off.  Being pissed off about taking pictures pisses me off.  Why do so many things piss me off?  I don't know, but it pisses me off.

Hope - Where did that mexican guy who used to coach Michigan go.  I wasn't finished giving him a piece of my mind.  No way am I going to mouth off to their new guy - he looks like a tank.

Paterno - Eh, the camera isn't really pointing at us, but it isn't really my job to worry about that, since it doesn't impact the football team, so I will just sit here and look senile. 

Ferentz - I am so bored right now, which is awesome, because I LOVE boring.

Fitzgerald - I hope I get an extra copy of this pic to send to my mom so that she can put it on her fridge.  She is going to be so proud right now.

Dantonio - Need to find a moment when nobody is looking so that I can take a swing at one of these coaches, just to show my team how it is done.

Zook - I've got it!!!  If we punt on second down from inside the red zone, nobody will see it coming.  hehehe, that's why they pay me the big bucks. 

Fickell - If I stay real still and pretend that I am dtaring at the ground, nobody will notice me.  PLease, nobody notice me. 

Kill - Wow, this Hoke guy is pretty cuddly. 

Hoke - blue shirt - check.  yellow tie - check.  Go Blue!

"Paterno: 'I've got to go to the bathroom.'" - My Dad's 83 and he said the exact same thing last Thanksgiving as we were leaving the club.*   He looks a lot like Joe P when he walks around.  (* - My uncle and dad live in Grosse Pointe and my brother and I cook Christmas dinner, but not T'giving.)

WILSON: I can't believe I just said we were going to be competitive this year 

BEILMA: I'm starving...oh look guys they are bringing the buffet out!

PELINI: Oh crap, I forgot...somthing, what was it?

HOPE: My mustache is way better manicured than the photographers

PATERNO: I hope my diaper isn't showing.

FERENTZ: What'd you just mumble Joe?

FITZGERALD: FML 

DANTONIO: I can't wait til my interview with ohio.

ZOOK: My punter is sooooo awesome this year guys, just wait, you'll see.

FICKELL: Oh lord Jesus please don't release our emails to ESPN.

KILL: I'll just squeeze right in between you Brady and Luke, don't mind me.

HOKE: Michigan, Michigan, Michigan, Michigan, Meeeeechigan.  That sounds so cool.

 

 

Hoke looks like he forgot his suit was dry clean only. Throw in a salad fergodsakes.

"well...."

Hoke - If I plant my hands firmly on my knees, they wont raise up to point at something.

Dantonio - Spartans!

 

I am going to take the picture now.  If any of you guys in the front row have a small package, put your hands in front of your crotch....

"But I look a lot better when I'm pointing at things."

Wilson - I only found out about this party yesterday from Pelini's facebook wall.  I can't believe they 'forgot' to invite me.
Bielema - Nice one, Bo.  What did I tell you?  Do your talking with your pads, between the whistles.  NOT on facebook.
Pelini - Holy shit I'm part of the B1G!  This is so.  awesome.
Hope - *devious, indiscernible whispering into Fickell's ear*
Paterno - They SAID they were taking me to Cracker Barrel.
Ferentz - Joe!  Look at Pelini, he forgot to wear his school-colored tie!
Fitzgerald - I'm still the youngest & coolest.  Take that, Luke!
Dantonio - How come nobody respects me?  I will attempt to perform a - what do you call it? - a 'smile', so they won't know it hurts.
Zook - Jelly beans.  Light bulb.  Rainbows.  I KNOW WHAT THE VOICES MEAN!
Fickell - ... the hell is wrong with you, Danny?  You've been emailing pictures of WHAT to my placekicker all season?  This can't be good.
Kill - Why did they put me between these two mammoths, I can't even breathe.
Hoke - Keep it together, Brady ... Resist the urge to point at things.  DO.  NOT.  POINT.

Why wouldn't they split them up by division?  I mean they are already in two rows, only seems like it would make sense to place them by division...

Wilson- We USED to be a basketball school. We USED to be a basketball school. We USED to be a basketball school. Bielema- NNNEEERRRRRRDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!! Pelini- This f@&$ing guy taking this f@&$ing picture better hurry the f@&$ up before I go all Blackshirt on his a$$! Hope- Nice 'stache Kill. Paterno- These pictures are so much better today. Knute Rockne and I once had to sit still for 45 minutes after having our picture taken together! Ferentz- I am on the hot seat again this year. But I am a leading candidate for every other job opening in the country. Life is tough. Fitzgerald- Persa for Heisman! Dantonio- I was supposed to be visiting some of my players in the county lock-up today. This is more important. Not more important than beating Michigan. NOTHING is more important than that! Zook- I can't believe I still fit into the same tie I wore to the 2002 SEC Media days! Fickell- Is it just me or does Chicago smell better than Columbus? Kill- I hope the Q&A goes well. I don't want to get nervous and seize up. Hoke- Man am I glad that Dave Brandon and Mary Sue Coleman didn't call my bluff when I said I would walk to Ann Arbor from San Diego.

Wilson - It could be worse...I could be at Minnesota

Bielema - Hurry up and snap the picture, I see beer!

Pelini - SHIT!! I think I locked my keys in the car!

Hope - Wilford Brimley my ass. His 'stache ain't got shit on mine.

Paterno - Why am I here, and who are you guys?

Ferentz - See Joe? They didn't forget your hoveround.

Fitzgerald - Gee willikers! The only thing that would be more swell than this is if dad let's me get the keys to the DeSoto so I could take Bethanne to the drive-in tonight. I've been dying to see "The Blob"

Dantonio - Gooooooood!! Something something something darkside.

Zook - I'm still employed with a 34-49 record? Boom, Zook'd!

Fickell - FML

Kill - It could be worse...I could be at Indiana

Hoke - Laura's making baked porkchops tonight...hell yeah

Them syreens did this to Pete. They loved him up and turned him into a horny toad. 

 

 

Dantonio: I'm a pretty, pretty princess!