[Ed-Seth: Bumped from the board because this is the single greatest reader contribution in MGoHistory. Original thread.]

So some (ahem) 2.5 years ago, when Brian did McGrone's recruiting profile, he called him "the very model of a modern Don Brown linebacker".

This immediately resulted in me taking a half-hour plus off work that afternoon to craft the entire rest of song ('The Major-General's Song, from G&S' The Pirates of Penzance)  in a comment on said article (about which Brian then sagely tweeted something like "the inevitable result of a passing Gilbert & Sullivan reference on a Michigan blog").

It's been an interesting couple years since then, but I thought that in honor of our newly-departed LB and DC that I would finally put my voice where my words were.  Not perhaps as funny as it was a while ago, but then again, 2020.  

Then again again, this is a Michigan blog and you are my people.  There are enough people that will find this hilarious to fit in a Suburban, and for that I thank you.

Here's to a better decade ahead, for all.

[After THE JUMP: the lyrics if you want to sing along]

I am the very model of a modern Don Brown linebacker,
I'm formed in blitzing, tackling, and the audibling of MIKE 'backer
I know the feats of Michigan, and quote the games historical
From Fielding Yost through Harbaugh, too, in order categorical;
I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters pure aggressional,
I understand what players stand to earn when they're professional;
So with a baseball coach from Yale I'm teaming my ability, ...
For timing of the snap with speed and strength and pure agility.

I'm really very good at rehabilitating ligaments;
I know E-S-P-N senior evals are naught but figaments;
In short, in matters blitzing, tackling--elements of MIKE 'backer,
I am the very model of a modern Don Brown linebacker.

I know our mythic history, from Ben Friedman to Ben Oosterbaan;
I've heard of Harbaugh's Guarantee, I've watched our docs on Amazon,
I translate into sonnets all the speeches of Bo Schembechler,
Been warned of Marcus Hall--I answer tactfully each dumb heckler;
The diff'rence of Lewan's and Coach Brown's mustaches is: sparsity!
I know the tenor descant to the long refrain of Varsity,
And I can hum The Victors march antiphonal, in dialogue, ... (hmm...ah!)
And downvote all the posts on that infernal nonsense MGoBlog.

Since I can shoot the A gaps as if bouncing off a trampoline;
I'm better than that Devin Bush at drawing of a wolverine;
In short, in matters blitzing, tackling--elements of MIKE 'backer,
I am the very model of a modern Don Brown linebacker.

In fact, when I know what is meant by "gap responsibility",
When I can tell at sight a pulling guard with no mobility,
When such affairs as covering a back split wide I never fear,
And when I know precisely what is meant by an inverted veer--
When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern spread offense,
(When I know more how Rutgers ended up in this damn conference!)
In short, when I've a smattering of Coach Brown's feisty attitude – 
You'll say a better MIKE 'backer has never, ever sat a Dude.

For Michigan's defense, though it's been plucky and adventury,
Has finally been dragged into the dawning of this century;

In short, in all the elements that do pertain to MIKE 'backer,
I am the very model of a modern Don Brown linebacker.