OT - MGoWeddings
So, I am getting married...eventually. I am recently engaged and I have been going through the process. I have discovered how much people are more than willing to share about their experiences and pass on advice. Almost everyones says "don't spend a lot of money" because they all did and while they enjoyed it the wedding, that's th emost common thing people would've changed.
Personally, I am about as excited as most men are about the actualy planning process involved.
One of the best stories I've heard so far involved a lost pair of pants for the groom, resulting in him wearing gray suit pants with his tux, and starting 3 hours late because of it.
Interesting stories...tips...advice?
Advice? DON'T GET MARRIED DURING FOOTBALL SEASON, EVEN ON A MICHIGAN BYE WEEK, DAMN IT.
EDIT 1: Fridays are acceptable, however. Getting married on a Friday will also save you some money, as many places discount the cost for having the reception on Fridays.
EDIT 2: I have a good looking mother-in-law and told her at the reception (when I was drunk, of course) that she looked sexy that night. I suggest not saying that to yours if you're attracted to her.
+1, too funny. Also definitely should not say that last comment to a mother-in-law you are NOT attracted to.
And you're still married?
My wife had no interest in a fall wedding. Partially because we both prefered summer but also because she realized that even if we got married on a Michigan bye week, somewhere down the line our anniversary would be on a Michigan game day.
"Advice? DON'T GET MARRIED" ... could have ended it right there.
I got married on a fall saturday, away game, hours after we throttled Indiana en route to a National Championship that year....There is no place I would rather spend an anniversary than in the Big House, watching our favorite team play. (Or in front of a TV if away)
I'm probably a bigger fan than he is. For sure more emotionally invested....He likes to say "it's just a game". I also wanted to add "In Michigan victories and losses" to the vows, but hubby thought it was too much. Who's side is he on anyway??
Do you have a sister?
I'm married, but that doesn't even matter right now.
The fall before last, I had two friends get married on Columbus day weekend. Their rehearsal dinner was on Saturday at a bowling alley in Ferndale. So far, so rad. However. Some of you may remember that weekend as the Penn State 4-OT Game Neither Team Wanted To Win. This wedding was at least 50% Wolverine, including the bride. Therefore, a significant contingent was watching the game in alternating joy and horror, but mostly disgust.
The bride's parents wanted to make a speech. So in the middle of the third OT, her dad dinged his glass, picked up a microphone, and started talking. There was a strangled, "But the game's still on!" in the back, but he soldiered on, as half his audience whipped back and forth between him and the game, paying attention to nary a word he said. We lost right before he finished talking.
Do not schedule your wedding on a football Saturday.
My sister in law thought that Thursday, Sept 3rd was a safe bet for her wedding since it wasn't on a Saturday, but she should have checked the schedule as well.
Dear iPhone:
Since you shared that you told your mother-in-law that she "looked sexy" I suspect many of us are curious
- how she reacted,
- how your bride reacted, assuming she found out, and
- does your mother-in-law ever bring the compliment up?
Sincerely,
EM
Avoid fall Saturdays. This helps not only you, but every male you will be inviting.
Don't get married on a Saturday in the fall, best for all parties involved. Nothing about weddings makes me happier than hearing thos two special little words "open bar."
We didn't do things the way that most people do. We found a hall that would let us bring our own food in, hired a catering company for a couple of dishes and for the plates, silverware, and service, and then ordered food from our favorite restaurants (trays). We had some friends pick them up from said restaurants before the reception and had some fantastic food at a fraction of the cost of having a caterer do it all (having actual good food was important to us).
We also decided not to do the normal head table (not only is it awkward, but you don't really end up eating anything, and you never get to really talk to the bridal party) so we did a round table, where we could seat the entire bridal party, and were able to eat and hang out with them for a bit (before doing all the obligatory stuff) - it made the reception far more enjoyable for all of us.
Don't spend a lot of money... and keep the wedding small. You might think you are friends with all those people, but you wont see them again much after the wedding. Invite family and EXTREMELY close friends to be in the bridal party.
My wife and I had our reception at Webers... I would highly reccommend you look into it. 92 people and there was plenty of room to dance, great food, and a great open bar.
Good Luck! (Also, let the moms plan the wedding, they will pay for more when they are the ones planning it)
92? Damn. My reception had over 400 people and cost around $50,000.
I mean cool story and all
But
If I was ballin like you are
I'd find better things to do with my time
Instead of humblebragging on MGo
400? Psht. My reception had at least 2,000 (though I have over 5,000 FB friends).
We had family and very close friends. It lets you interact with everyone. Instead, if it's a few hundred people, you'll only be able to say "hi" and it's hard to spend time with them.
And regarding weddings during football season: I agree to avoid having the ceremony on a Saturday. But our's was in September on a Thursday just before an away Notre Dame game. Guests still in town gathered at a bar to cheer on Michigan. It was fun.
And our first anniversary fell on a home Michigan game, which was a lot of fun. We went to the game and had a fancy dinner at the Gandydancer. Of course, this all depends on if your wife-to-be is a Michigan football fan, too.
Congratulations on your engagement!
We were able to get friends to help us and do a lot of the things (and bought things from alternative places instead of 'wedding' services)... we ended up with 160 people and for everything ended up paying less than $6,500 (all wedding costs; it helped a ton that my wife found a discounted dress at one of the crazy wedding dress shops in NYC when we visited ($450 for the dress (friend's mom that was a tailor did the alterations for cheap)... discounted from a couple thousand) and we had friends (professional photographers) that as a gift did our photograhy for free).
(Examples: My sister and one of her friends, both of whom are excellent cooks, baked our wedding cake so the cost was very very small. For hor d'oeuvres we bought a bunch of things from Costco and they were prepped by friends on site and prior to the wedding/reception.)
Celebrant.
Backyard.
Immediate family only.
MASSIVE HONEYMOON EXTRAVAGANZA.
Or if you're a bit older like my wife and I are when we settled down (43 for me, 36 for her), use the money as a downpayment on a house you truly love.
I've never known anyone except the truly rich that would have had a big extravagent wedding all over again.
Invite me. I'm a blast at weddings.
I promise I will try to not make a move on the bride
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I got married in August and we waited until the following December to take the honeymoon in Australia.
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I think it depends on what you are going to do. If you are going to do something relaxing, like lying on a beach, that's perfect for right after. You are going to want the break. We waited a few months to go on ours (a 2 week tour of Europe), and we were both happy we did since it was a lot of travelling around. After the wedding is over, all you're going to want to do is relax.
A relaxing week in the Greek Isles to start, and a nice week in Paris before bringing it home...
On the honeymoon, I would highly recommend waiting until Monday or Tuesday after the wedding to leave. That way you don't have to worry about rushing to the airport the day after your wedding and can just relax for a day after the wedding
My husband and I had a fun wedding but we did what people do at weddings: got married, had a cocktail reception, dancing and dinner. This is so not who we are. Knowing this now, it would have been really fun to make football Saturday part of the wedding. We could have gotten married in the morning, and then rented out a venue to watch the game and have great food. If I could do it all over again, that's what I would do. But I guess your fiancee would have to be up for it.
Nope. Sorry. It's not just "the" game. There are several games to watch every Saturday in autumn. There is no excuse (other than not caring about football) to have a wedding on an autumn Saturday.
is this the second time I've (fake*) proposed to you?
* not so fake if you can convince my wife
Keep your mouth shut and do what she wants.
Also,(for the reception) get drunk, party your ass off, and then get laid at the end of the night.
We got married on riverboat and the main road 28th street in GR was closed day of wedding for car show. We had no idea of he car show and had to text and call everyone with new directions when we found out, which was 2hrs before wedding when we went for pics.. It was a mess but a fifth of jäger with best men helped!!!
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Another suggestion: Get a professional DJ if possible (unless you're getting a band, which is a horrible idea anyway). Those typical 'DJs" who work for wedding DJ companies are usually bad. I hired a local DJ in my area of the country who spins at all the good clubs here and he was great. Not only did he mix well (wedding DJ company DJs don't usually do that, which is horrific), but he knew how to get everyone into it.
Also, stay away from the typical, crappy, and cliché wedding reception music, i.e. "Brown Eyed Girl" and shit like that. That is horrible, horrible, horrible music. Pick good songs that YOU and your wife like. Mix in some new ones with old school. That said, if you like crappy music like "Brown Eyed Girl" and the like, then so be it. Have the DJ play that stuff.
and no line dance songs...
I don't know what crappy wedding bands you've seen, but a good band at a wedding is amazing. They're also really expensive, running $5k plus, which makes it cost prohibitive. We had a DJ, but my one regret is not getting a band.
We found a Latino band that was reminiscent of the Gipsy Kings. In hindsight, I probably would have picked something more conventional because a lot of people couldn't relate at all to that kind of music. We loved it, but people didn't dance a ton. But it kind of went with the food which was Rick Bayless-inspired Mexican.
You do realize that for like 4,000 years, all music was performed live, right? And people seemed to like it enough to keep doing it.
Some terrible advice re: band. Good wedding bands are better than a DJ playing his ipod. Good is the key word. Nothing can ruin a wedding more so than either a bad band or DJ. Do your diligence. If you've been to a good wedding in the area, figure out who played that one.
Try to remember every wedding that you have been to had terrible music and remember those songs. Put them on a do not play list. Having a do not play list is much better than picking every song (but shouldn't stop you from having 1-2 must play songs)
a jazz trio or quartet. Keep it simple and tasteful. Nobody, I repeat nobody wants to go to another wedding with a DJ.
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I think we invited maybe 50 people. We had our reception at a good restaurant and the food was terrific. I think it cost me only about 2k.
Save the money for your honeymoon. Book a week or 10 day stay at an all-inclusive in the Caribbean or Mexico. Secrets is a nice resort. No kids and very upscale. Great food. Bring at least $500 in small bills for tips. Spreading around a little cash right when you get there will make sure you get outstanding service for the whole trip.
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