META/OT/SIAP: Merry Half-Festivus - I've got a lot of problems with you people
As the bleak, stark expanse of the offseason drags out before us, a cabin fever of sorts has set in, and cracks in the facade of our collective sanity have begun to expose themselves. We've seen a lot of back-and-forth about OT rules and points and cool stories, bro. These squabbles are merely symptoms of the greater conflicts that simmer just beneath the surface.
In that spirit, I declare today to be the FIRST ANNUAL FESTIVUS IN JUNE CELEBRATION. We shall now commence with the airing of the grievances. I will begin.
- Pope Gregory XIII - May was too long. June is currently too long. July is not looking promising. If his Gregorian Calendar was better constructed, we wouldn't be in this mess.
- Ghosts - I feel haunted by the ghosts of a number of coaches from the past. They are less cordial than I was anticipating.
- People who declare things to the the "First Annual" - At this point, it's just "the first." You need two points to create a line. One point is simply "shit that happened today."
- Tyler Ecker - PITCH THE GODDAMN BALL TO BREASTON
- Henri - Enough with the ennui. We get it.
Thus begins my list. There shall be more. Your turn.
You know what gets under my skin? People with "Don" in their screen name. :-)
to Buck Turgidson.
Why should he change? YOU'RE the one who sucks.
/MichaelBolton'd
You could change your name to Buck Turgidson
Would I get his secretary with the name change package?
Maybe your mad at Don for bringing "ball stickiness" to light since it may be a huge concern for you living in AZ?
...Ball stickiness and the great underwear debate.
See, ball stickiness is not an issue in dry-heat Arizona. No humidity, no stickiness.
As I sit here and type this my balls are comfortably non-sticky. Which is good, because they're attached to a loser named Don, and for that they're not very happy. :-)
Honestly, name a single Don or Donald that has done anything good for society.
Donald Duck is a dick.
Donald Trump, Don King, McDonald's. All horrible entities. No good comes from naming your kid Don. They will turn into miscreants and ne'er-do-wells. Seriously guys, change your names now or face a lifetime of hedonism and mediocrity.
name a single Don or Donald that has done anything good for society
Can't. Don't exist. Frickin' losers, one and all. My wife confirms that, by the way.
Wait ... maybe "King Dons":
Heaven help me, I love that sort of thing.
I like SPAM as well.
Crap ... look at my screen name ... I'm a dick.
Hey now my real first name is Don.
And I know we're suppose to bitching here but your avatar is from the single greatest movie EVA!
Don Canham would like a word with you.
As would Don Ho, Don Knotts, Don Henley, Don Johnson, Don Rickles, Don Cherry, Don Shula, and Don Zimmer.
And another bit of important information:
Meaning of "Donald" In Irish, the name Donald means "world leader."
I see you.
Do you live near Bieber by any chance?
He rested on Sunday because he spent Saturday planning and creating college football. And he spent most of Saturday afternoon paying particular attention to Michigan football. It shows. :-)
I hate when the site forces me to comment on OTs that don't pertain to my interests. I wish they'd create an option where you could view the title of the post and then decide whether it was worth reading or commenting on.
Couldn't agree more.
Brian achieves this by broadcasting infrasound from MGoBlog. We can't hear it and aren't concious of its insidious effects, but many MGoBloggers experience an irresistible compulsion to visit OT threads they aren't interested in, and then complain about them. Damn you Brian!
doesn't have a link that redirects people who want to dicuss nonsensical topics that are of minimal interest to the majority of the board members to places with similar board material...... like MLive...... or RCMB......
Also, another vote for not having the old point system.
This comment is why we need posbangs back. Fake +1 for you, good sir, on this half Festivus.
And a jolly "Fuck You" to all of you! You are all nuts! I hate the incessant whining about grammar, punctuation, appropriate title threads, stupid threads, informative threads, recruiting news, the Tigers/Lions/Pistons/Wings/soccer/USMNT/barbecue! And especially I hate all the drinking threads! WTF is wrong with you alcoholics that you want to brag about how expensive/rare/delicious your malty fermented crap is???
/s
The island of Pitcairn. I just found out about them last week, and those people are messed up! I blame them for everything that's wrong with our world today.
I just spent a good forty five minutes reading up...
crazy
Good read. Unfortunate and a plethera of other descriptive words, but a good read, nonetheless.
that say or use the word "epic". Quaker Oats (stick to the diabeetus guy you fucks!), Reeses Puffs, that new got dammed animated dreck that I'm sure sucks.
The word sucked 5 years ago when it went mainstream and it sucks even more now that "corporate" America has finally jumped on the badwagon.
Epic post brah! Up top!
to the list!
Thanks for sticking it to my ex-masters/pricks at Quaker. It's the right thing to do, my ass.
i am disappointed in the rest of the AL central, whose girl slap fighting ability will allow the tigers to coast into the playoffs without any sense of urgency
...a link and some variation of "Title says it all." Bravo, OP, your total lack of effort is incredibly uninspiring.
There are some people on here that neg-bang everything, or neg-bang everything by certain posters, even if it is a comment that actually positively contributes to the conversation. I know I've somehow developed a few of those haters, because I've been negbanged in a POSBANG thread for no reason whatsoever. There have even been other posters commenting on my posts with "why was this downvoted?" posts. So my festivus grievance is the neg-bangers, and the fact that they can't just come forward and tell me what I did to tick them off so that I may attempt to make amends.
And the mosquitos and balls sticking to your thighs, that it brings with it.
Remember, it is not so much the heat, but the stupidity.
Ahh, I feel better getting that off of my chest.
Who wants to arm wrassle?
Maybe some pants are in order when you're outside.
Your on fire today.
takes a little more time to develop than Don's.
your old avatar - the face picking ND blonde chick.
And you probably thought people don't care or notice. Charlie Baumann getting punched is solid and an image for the ages, but feasting on her misery is so much better.
Let's agree to disagree.
you might be right - I was somewhat talking out my ass.
with the fact that I am wondering why you are sitting outside in the humidity, with your sticky balls, just offering to arm wrassle anyone who walks by...
not Frank Costanza. Although, he would have no problem siiting in the yard arm wrestling with his balls out. Maybe a little more punctuation in my post would have been beneficial. However, it would not have been as entertaining as the rest of this thread is becoming.
Why you no have sense of humor? So stoic and befuddled. I can only guess that puritan roots are to blame.
Glad to be moving back to Michigan in a few weeks, back to a people I can understand intuitively.
Don't blame it on the Puritans. It's those effing Quakers and Amish. If they could just learn to stick to themselves and stop sticking their noses in other people's business, everything would be fine.
If a post is simply well-labled then anybody with a brain should be able to figure out whether it is "off-topic" or not.
And considering that this is a community where people do want to talk about other things than football maybe there should be some kind of adjacent or affiliated OT forum with very little moderation and an enter-at-your-own-risk-because-just-about-anything-goes ethos.
maybe there should be some kind of adjacent or affiliated OT forum with very little moderation and an enter-at-your-own-risk-because-just-about-anything-goes ethos
There are literally millions of forums like that all over the internet. Just venture on over to RCMB to see how that works when combined with a team-related sports blog. There may be some constructive and informative posts over there, but everybody knows it by its reputation: a low-brow place where you only go if you want to discuss things like how long it takes for a woman's egg to become fertilized once you start trying to get pregnant (not even kidding). I don't want this blog to become tainted by being associated with that.
Brian lied. Suprise!
people who say "I may be wrong, but...". Don't tell me you may be wrong when you clearly don't think you are. Also Louisville basketball. Hate them!!
Celebrities. I'm not talking about, like, Jack Nicholson or people like that. Jack Nicholson has talent and he's at Lakers games because he roots for the Lakers, not because he feels like he hasn't been spotted at one recently enough and needs to be seen. I mean, like, fuck you Kim Kardashian with your troweled-on makeup and your simpering little smile and your lack of marketable skills of any kind. Fuck you Justin Bieber for being such a spoiled little dick that spoiled little dicks like Keyshawn Johnson actually think you're being too much of a spoiled little dick. Also fuck you Lindsey Lohan for being gorgeous and talented (seriously, the girl can act, or used to be able to, I saw Freaky Friday and she was honestly brilliant) and throwing it all away on purpose because drugs and shit were more important. Fuck you people who are least worthy of attention in this world and yet get the most of it because the world is full of shallow-minded morons who pay other shallow-minded morons to follow you around with cameras.
Add to that rant anything to do with "The Bachelor" or "The Bachelorette" or whatever the hell it's called. Nobody gives a shit. Well, some do, obviously ... they watch the shows ... but we can reasonably dismiss them as worthless shits for watching the show.
Nice rant, by the way ... not bad for someone with a UVA reference in their screen name. My wife went to UVA. She's obnoxious to the point of irritation about "Mr. Jefferson". Damn university with it's effed-up wavy brick walls, and its unfathomable tradition of dressing up for a football game. Preppy assholes. I hate their livers and guts. :-)
It sounds like you married up in the world ;)
Oh, I did ... I definitely did!! :-)