Win will cause me to/Loss will cause me to

Win will cause me to run around the neighborhood screaming "Anything is Possibbbbbllllleeeeee!!!!!" like Kevin Garnett 

Loss will disappoint me but analyzing the teams I think OSU has the overall better team, so.........

 

Loss will cause me to say "yeah that's what I depressingly expected"

Win will cause me to not know what do do with myself

Either outcome is the same....Drink heavily

The answer to both is Drink. The question then becomes - How much?

A win will make me scream so loudly that I will lose my voice, and thus have to drink a lot of beer for analgesic purposes.

A loss will pretty much do the same - except I will also drink the beer for emotional purposes.

But in either case, I will remind myself that I thought that 8-4 would be this team's ceiling - which means I will drink the beer to congratulate myself for being so wrong.

So no matter what the outcome, there's gonna be a lot of beer.

GO BLUE!!!

Cry and Cry

Win will cause me to smile ear-to-ear.

Loss will cause me to watch more Yumi Nagashima videos.

Win will cause a mental awakening, true jubilation, and 24 to 1,000 hours of basking in highlights and derivative articles that fluffedly tell me nothing I haven't already known or experienced; I'll continuously choose to just bathe in it.

Lose and I will turn the TV off at 0:00, choose--instead--to feel nothing, become surprisingly effective at forgetting that sports exist, and go be sweet with my wife.

Win will cause me to go to work next friday, also causing immense joy.

Loss will cause me to vacation to ann arbor next friday, also causing immense joy, just delayed.

OP, guessing you live out by sugarloaf.  

Loss will cause me to... not really be that upset? I'll be more upset by HOW the loss takes place. If they're still running the same splitz zone/read option/thing that will never work because you're playing with an arm tied behind your back, I will be annoyed to no end. If they lose after a 2017 like game plan, where you can see how they were attacking and how it could be successful, I will be content.

Win will cause me throw both my niece and nephew on my back and run around my sister's house like Haskins carrying dudes into the endzone. Only difference being I'll be winded after 1 lap and my knee will give out while my niece and nephew laugh at me. And it will be WORTH IT!

Win: HARBAUGH CAN STAY FOREVER

Lose: HARBAUGH CAN LEAVE FOREVER

jokes aside this season has been far more successful than I could have hoped and at least it gives me real hope for next season 

Win will cause me to be horse, crying tears of joy, and have one of the best days of my life watching the game with my kids at the GAME. 

Loss will cause me to be grateful I was in attendance and not worry about the loss because the last 20 years has taught me other things are more important. 

The last OSU game I attended was 97’. Woodson ran it back right to my corner of the end zone. Hoping to relive that experience!

Win will cause me to devour all sports media for a week leading into the B1G championship 

Loss will cause me to avoid all sports media/Harbaugh bashing until the bowl 

Win: remember the feeling after the team beat OSU in the past. Feel that again, with #eutm

Non win: oh no, not again

WIN: Parade through the streets for days in a faded MICHIGAN sweatshirt and greet passers-by with a shit-eating grin and louder-than-necessary "GO BLUE!"

LOSS: sadness, pain, anger, disappointment for the "good guys" in the winged helmets.

Win will cause me to run around the neighborhood nude screaming "GO BLUE!!" at the top of my lungs. Win will also cause me to get arrested for public indecency.  Maybe I should go "Body Suit Man" a la George Constanza in Seinfeld.

Loss will cause me to, I don't know, what ever I did 16 of the last 17 years after a loss in The Game.

Win: prepare for the massive asteroid about to clobber earth. 
Lose: have another beer. 

Win: Delighted. Shocked. My family will be annoyed, because I will be... animated.

Loss: Figures/always knew. You know what's a great sport? Hockey. 

Winning will cause me to enter the 'Nirvana' state and I will stay there for a long time regardless of what I am doing.

Losing will cause me to reflect on the mindset of Two Rivers folk and pick up the pieces and put them back together. Just like we always do.

Win- my neighbors will say that annoying guy is yelling again.

Loss- my neighbors will say that annoying guy is yelling again.

WIN:  

Loss:

Win (thinking optimistically) will make me think of this:

Loss (thinking pessimistically) will make me think of this:

As much as I'd like to keep hope alive and witness the upset victory on Saturday, sadly, during the past 16 years, I've numbingly become attuned to this:

Win be like:

Loss be like:

Reality: Not gonna do it. 

A win will cause me to check the blog every 15 mins to view the utter hysteria this site will bring…

We aren’t losing 

Win will hasten the Singularity. 
 

Loss will cause me to commandeer the mic at this wedding reception to recount any number of war stories starring the pre-recovery groom. 

I'm going to unload all the OSU memes and talk all the shit to this clown in my fantasy league who takes every opportunity to shit on Michigan (beat him this year, btw). Also will try immediately to get tickets to Indy.

Loss will cause me to try my best not to act sad at the inlaws Thanksgiving dinner Saturday and remind myself repeatedly that we are playing in Pasadena on NYD.

A win will cause me to read all the “Fire Day” posts over at 11wankers.

A loss will cause me to read all the “Fire Harbaugh” posts here at MGoBlog. 

Win will cause me to go to the bar in my custom jersey and buy the closest people next to me a round of beers. 
 

Loss will:

(if blowout is occurring) shut off game and act like it was a great 10-1 season. 
 

(if to the wire) mope in bed until Sunday reading the toxic game thread. 

Win: For years I've promised that when we finally beat Ohio State, I will run down my street wearing my big block M flag like a Superman cape (I'm 56 -- a spry 56 -- just so you get the picture). 

Lose: I will immediately change gears so I don't have to feel the disappointment in the moment. I will then have a latent reaction the next day, dwelling on it, getting angry, and then it will slowly dissipate over the following days. 

Loss will cause me to drink and happily celebrate a 10 win season. No further questions at this time. 

If we win, I'll never post here again. If we lose, I'll probably shitpost. 

Open my bottle of Woodson Bourbon and savor the first sip.

Watch It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia for 10 straight hours.

I’ll let y’all figure out what outcome causes which action.

Win will cause me to: start looking into how much Wisconsin has truly improved since UM trashed them early in the season.

Loss will cause me to: keep a close eye on whether UM will get the Rose Bowl or Fiesta Bowl.  If it's the Fiesta Bowl, I will attend the game.  I will be in metro Phoenix on January 1st.

#GoBlue

Win: Restart the world from 2006 - post-first drive. M is back.

Lose: Fous on basketball - this is going to be a fun season.