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Well, thanks for the offer,…

Well, thanks for the offer, pumpkin, but I wasn't replying to you.

Or, as I once heard it…

Or, as I once heard it called, "Shiv that Mofo Day."

That's "CCH" Pounder.

Or…

That's "CCH" Pounder.

Or are you finally taking the advice of so many people on this blog and getting the H out of here?

I took a nap, and dreamed of…

I took a nap, and dreamed of a team that knows how to shoot and play defense.

OK. I pick Michigan and I…

OK. I pick Michigan and I hate Ohio State. (Did I do it right?)

 

PS: And I will NEVER bow! I will, however, welcome our new insect overlords.

Love that scene. It was both…

Love that scene. It was both frightening and funny as hell, and it was the perfect visual set-up for the "bigger boat" line that followed. This was a great direction by a guy who really knew what he was doing.

Whereas the basketball team ...

Why in the world would a 25…

Why in the world would a 25 year old ever beat on an 80 year old?

I take it we're looking for a reason other than the obvious, "Because he's a gutless pussy."

This like having the most…

This like having the most skilled helmsman back aboard the Titanic.

In the immortal words of…

In the immortal words of Archie Bunker, the gods are claiming their pound of fish.

It's almost as if he was not…

It's almost as if he was not fully aware.

Homey the AD.

Homey the AD.

Several years ago I worked…

Several years ago I worked at Wayne State's College of Nursing. In my completely unbiased opinion, nurses are badasses. Whenever I've been in the hospital, they are the ones who gave the majority of the care and got me the information I needed. (Like, "What do they think is really wrong with me?") I'm not dogging doctors in the least, but God Bless Nurses.

Does your daughter have a specialty?

From what I've been told by…

From what I've been told by friends who are nurses, I'd have guessed that they were too exhausted to smile.

If that were true, Juwan…

If that were true, Juwan would be cleaning out his office as we speak.

I'm not sure that's a…

I'm not sure that's a completely fair analogy. Voldemort actually cast the evil spells that resulted in all the terrible things on his resume. He didn't buy the dark magic cast by other wizards and then stick his name on it.

Now, as far as charm and personality goes, the comparison is a lot closer.

I was about to leave the…

I was about to leave the house to go to a Ski Club party at UM-Flint. (Five bucks got you in the door and all the beer you could drink. It was definitely a different time.) I'd been following the hockey team very closely, and really wanted to see the game. But then I thought, Hell, it's the Soviets - there's no way we'll win.

A few hours later I heard the news. I'd never been so happy to be wrong. It almost made up for striking out at the party.

Sorry to see his college…

Sorry to see his college career attached to this season's tire fire, and especially sorry to see it shortened by injury. To those more knowledgeable in basketball than me: Does he have any realistic prospects of playing professionally here or in Europe?

It's not a completely…

It's not a completely generational thing. I'm 63, so Bo was the Coach when I started my UM fandom and all through my formative years. To me, he was The Man at Michigan. Later in my 30's he and Brandy were the guest speakers at a luncheon my organization held. Instead of my usual suit, I wore my Michigan jersey. When he saw me standing at the reception desk, he pointed at me and barked "Hey number 12!", and I replied "Coach." That exchange with The Man made my day.

But if he knew about what Anderson was doing to his players, or to any young person, and he did nothing? A man of his magnitude at Michigan, and he simply shrugged his shoulders and sat on his hands and let it happen? Then pull the statue down, and sandblast his name off the hall that bears it. Because whatever "leadership" is supposed to mean, that certainly isn't it.

 

The shitty lawyer has more…

The shitty lawyer has more ready access to the legal system than you do ...

Very much like the old saying from a politician warning against fighting with newspaper publishers: Never argue with a man who buys ink by the barrel.

"National Championship."

"National Championship."

Now that we have it, it should be said in its entirety so that we can relish every letter and syllable.

"Truce" is a great way to…

"Truce" is a great way to describe the victory formation. It sends a clear message: "We're not going to try to gain yardage, so you don't have to try and stop us." It's the football equivalent of waving a white flag.

If you're going to try to score for whatever reason, that's up to you. But don't wave the flag. It's a dick move.

Agreed. It's one thing if…

Agreed. It's one thing if your starters are jacking up threes when you're up by 20 with a minute to go. That shows no class. But if it's Bob, who never gets out of his warm-ups, let him get something on the stat sheet: a bucket, an assist, a rebound, whatever. Especially if you're at home.

Both teams have their own Bobs, so if the game reaches the point where both teams empty the end of their benches, then let them play. That's what they're on the team for.

I'm sure His Nibs was being…

I'm sure His Nibs was being figurative, not literal. Then again, as I grew up selling matches near the corner of Teeming Shores St. and Huddled Masses Blvd., how would I know for certain?

That's a tradition of every…

That's a tradition of every fan base of every team in every sport.

He ended up on the same pile…

He ended up on the same pile as Cousin Oliver from "The Brady Bunch" and the first kid who played the youngest brother Chris on "The Partridge Family."

I knew this was coming from…

I knew this was coming from somebody, and I was waiting to upvote whomever did.

I, for one, welcome our new…

I, for one, welcome our new insect overlords. Not sure they could be any worse.

In 1970, my folks divorced,…

In 1970, my folks divorced, my mother re-married, and we moved to a new school district in Flint. The rule of thumb among the boys in the 5th grade was that you had to be either a Michigan or MSU fan. Until that point I had no allegiance to either. However, State sucked, Michigan was a powerhouse, and I guess I was a little bit of a front-runner, so Michigan it was. Besides, Michigan had the much cooler uniforms, and especially THOSE helmets.

Because of such an insignificant reason, a lifelong passion for all things Michigan was born. Plus, I graduated from UM-Flint in 1982, so I come by that passion honestly.

First memory was of Don Moorhead handing off to Touchdown Billy Taylor. The most vivid memory was of Mike Lantry breaking my heart twice.

No, I'm completely serious -…

No, I'm completely serious - and don't call me Shirley.

As well as Homer's guardian…

As well as Homer's guardian angel in one of the best episodes of "The Simpsons." ("Did you know Kinch had a radio in the coffee pot?")

This blog gets members from…

This blog gets members from all over the country, so ... Chances Are.

Excellent piece, and…

Excellent piece, and extremely insightful. It reminded me of a conversation I had with a buddy who had been an automotive engineer for two of the Big Three. I mentioned that I thought my girlfriend's car was a piece of crap, but since I had no automotive background, my opinion probably wasn't worth much.

He immediately replied, "Oh I agree, because that car ..." and fired off five or six things that the manufacturer should / shouldn't have done. Just recited them "bam-bam-bam-bam-bam" right off the top of his head, like you or I would recite the alphabet.

A clear reminder that experience really is a benefit. It makes some opinions worth more than others, and for very good reason.

Sorry, but they're…

Sorry, but they're overpriced.

I've got a foot in both…

I've got a foot in both camps here. Every accomplishment that you've listed has been fantastic, even more than I imagined. It's been a glorious three-year run. And like you, if the cost of that success is an 8-4 season, especially considering the loss of personnel and coaches and the brutal schedule, I'll sign on the dotted line right now.

On the other hand, and I've said this before: I am a Michigan fan, first and foremost. I may like certain players or coaches, but my loyalty is to the Team, the guys in maize and blue who run onto the field every Saturday. If you chose to leave the Team, for whatever reason, that's your right, and it may be what's best for you. But my support for you fades. It doesn't necessarily turn into loathing (unless you're a Boren or a Mattison), but it won't be what it once was, because you're not part of the Team.

And what Harbaugh is doing, whether it's comfortable to admit it or not, is hurting our Team. Yes, he has the right and the responsibility of doing the best job he can in San Diego. But we have the right to dislike what he's doing, and him for doing it. To use the coaching tree analogy, he's lopping off limbs and transplanting them in San Diego. All the gratitude in the world for what he accomplished doesn't change the harm he's causing to our Team.

So to make a long story short (too late!), my reaction is, Jim, for what you've done, thank you very much. For what you're doing, fuck you.

The MGoGirlfriend and I were…

The MGoGirlfriend and I were talking after Harbaugh announced he was going to San Diego. I said he had to go for the one thing he hadn't gotten, the Super Bowl win. The Lombardi Trophy was his Holy Grail.

She said, Yeah, but once he gets it, what does he do then?

The more I thought, the more I realized it was a really good question. What does Jim do if he fulfills his quest, when / if he's faced with a "Oh yeah, I've already done this" situation? What's left when there's no more quest?

Somehow, JH doesn't seem the type to rest on his laurels, or rest at all. Some people just don't know how.

... for everyone else to…

... for everyone else to benefit from your nuts.

Actually, at my age, I'm not sure how much benefit there would be.

"The only thing worse than…

"The only thing worse than an idiot is an idiot with power."

(Don't know if this saying has a title, but I've seen it way too many times not to be true.)

I still despise the Twins…

I still despise the Twins and their homer-hanky waving fans for 1987. The worst moment was seeing Daryl Evans get picked off 3rd base.

Nah. Then he'll just keep…

Nah. Then he'll just keep coming up with hair-brained schemes that accomplish nothing but getting Reuben Kincaid into trouble.

That was just sad. The end…

That was just sad. The end of this season can't get here soon enough.

I'm thinking their pad level…

I'm thinking their pad level is gonna need work.

I have the same issue with…

I have the same issue with Major League, where Corbin Bernsen looked like he'd never swung anything heavier than a squash racket. But in Rocky, Carl Weathers looked like the real deal.

Rest in peace, Apollo.

So my eternal salvation or…

So my eternal salvation or damnation will be based upon the fact that I once got caught wiping my boogers on the underside of my chair during story time?

 

OK. Tough but fair.

(No subject)

And to go way, way back:

And to go way, way back:

'Taint What You Do (It's the Way That You Do It).

I saw a mock draft last week…

I saw a mock draft last week that had Zinter going to the Lions in the 3rd. Love to see that happen.

This piece was almost as…

This piece was almost as beautiful as those three Mr. Bright Side angels.

Well done on both cases, sir.

Appreciate T. Will? Sure,…

Appreciate T. Will? Sure, why not. Through hard work, the guy is definitely a better player in his final year.

Besides, it's not like there's a whole lot to appreciate otherwise.

It’s not like if they don’t…

It’s not like if they don’t win my kids are gonna get put in the gulag ...

"Hello, FOX? I got a great new idea for a game show!"

Paddling like hell and not…

Paddling like hell and not getting anywhere = Iowa's offense.