WAY OT: Best Male Life
Been managing a lengthy debate at work over the concept of "Best Male Life."
The question: Who, among the world's male species, is leading a life worthy of the MOST envy? Of course, the debate is an inexact science, so I've quantified it down to the following criteria:
- Fame
- Riches
- Attractiveness
- Attention from women
- Best at what they do
- Pop culture relevance
Tom Brady has been leading the office debate for some time now; scoring high across all of the above measurements. He's hard to argue with. Tiger Woods' fall from grace knocked him out of contention, as this is purely a list of CURRENT contenders -- although you could argue Tiger still merits a place at the table. George Clooney/Brad Pitt merit some consideration, although they both lose points on age, and I'm not sure either are the best at what they do. One person in my office demands Dave Grohl's consideration. He's an interesting consideration. While scoring low on attractiveness, ya gotta figure the guy leads a Top-10 life.
Me, I have lobbied for Prince Harry. Dude looks like he's having the time of his life. He's got the money, looks, and access to everything he wants -- with NONE of the responsibility. Prince Harry is my number 1 going into 2015.
On this week before SB, I'd be curious of your thoughts on this utterly moronic, unwinnable debate.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:16 PM ^
My next life I want to be Buffett. Travel around the caribbean with great stories, perform a handful of shows a year in a party atmosphere, and be an incredibly sucessful businessman. I was SHOCKED when I found out his net worth.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:28 PM ^
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January 26th, 2015 at 12:15 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 2:55 PM ^
Finally some picked JV, he seems to be doing just fine - Justin, Kate, and the Twins....
January 26th, 2015 at 12:15 PM ^
Gotta vote for Jeter as well. Played a sport at a Hall of Fame level for a long time with minimal permanent damage to his body while making close to $200 Million. Also dated a multitude of hot women without having any scandal in NYC.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:18 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:17 PM ^
OP do you have kids? Because having happy, healthy, successful kids trumps everything on that list.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:21 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:26 PM ^
For having three girls? That doesn't make you horrible, it just makes you outnumbered. The balance of the house is not in your favor... Good luck with that. I can't tell if you are faux offended by my comment, but it wasn't meant as a jab.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:23 PM ^
That sound hard to achieve. Can someone comment on the joy of having healthy, unsuccessful kids?
January 26th, 2015 at 12:27 PM ^
Well... the joy in that is that you get to keep them around for much longer than 18 years, I guess. No empty nest syndrome?
January 26th, 2015 at 12:19 PM ^
"Gimme that rye, ya old bag!"
January 26th, 2015 at 12:18 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 1:28 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:18 PM ^
Not only is he French but he's a billionaire (15 billion) and his family owns Kering. But the most important qualification, he knocked up Salma Hayek!!! What a life!!!
January 26th, 2015 at 12:19 PM ^
You're in the top tier of your local food chain, with no mortgages, cable bills, clients, or college to pay for.
Plus there's the being able to fly thing.
January 26th, 2015 at 1:04 PM ^
DDT would've killed you dead in the 1960's, Don. (Not that I'm making any assumptions about your age!).
January 26th, 2015 at 3:51 PM ^
I only eat organic fish and rodents, so I'm OK.
January 26th, 2015 at 2:26 PM ^
I was thinking animal too. In the end, I'm going with a fuck lion.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:20 PM ^
Leo DiCaprio. Hasn't won an Oscar, but hard to argue that he isn't one of the best actors in the business. Has the looks, and very few people can break up with a Victoria's Secret model and go home with 20 girls in hand the next night.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:26 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:41 PM ^
Harry is bound by the traditions and rules of being part of the royal family. Anything dumb he does, it looks bad on his family and gets scrutinized. Leo on the other hand lives life by his own rules.
January 27th, 2015 at 12:35 AM ^
Harry gets to skate by on a lot of those traditions because he gets air cover from not being his brother. It's almost expected "Poor Harry, he'll never get to be King. Of course he needs to act out now and then. You would too for the disappointment. Leave him alone."
Meanwhile he laughing all the way to the party.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:21 PM ^
Can I nominate myself?
Great sports career as a teenager, all conference twice, even played for U-M.
Great job, with great pay.
Giant house, lots of properties, with toys like a sports car.
Hot wife, who happens to be a great wife.
Beautiful daughters.
Many very close friends.
Well respected in my community.
Thank you God!
January 26th, 2015 at 12:29 PM ^
I thought you were divorced and your ex-wife, Cynthia, went to Hawaii with Marty Ackerman?
January 26th, 2015 at 12:49 PM ^
So when you get divorced, do you turn in your library card? Do you stop being Jewish?
January 26th, 2015 at 6:29 PM ^
Noooooooobody!!!
January 26th, 2015 at 12:32 PM ^
Well... I have a giant penis and exquisite calf muscles. Also, I won a free boombox from our raffle at senior prom. Beat that!
January 26th, 2015 at 12:57 PM ^
You got me beat Walter.
Horrible sports career. Pudgy teenager (the term back then was "husky") who got cut from everything I tried out for.
Crappy job. Work the window for the night shift at Taco Bell.
Live in a box underneath the overpass connecting 480/77 here in Cleveland. It's a nice box though.
Wife weighs somewhere between 250-300 and has some wierd skin disorder that makes her covered in acne (the avatar's just a goof)
Two of my three son's are in jail. The third is awaiting sentencing.
One close friend. But I'm not sure he's actually real as we've only really spoken over the internet. He might actually be a Spambot (keeps asking me if I want to make $8,000 a week working from home)
The community of people living under the freeway seem to like me OK though. At least when I've got Thunderbird to share.
So I guess I"m out.
January 26th, 2015 at 1:02 PM ^
Wait a minute, werent you the one who took the boat trip from Put-in-Bay to Port Huron?
/S
January 26th, 2015 at 2:02 PM ^
You didn't say anything about having a boat.
Seriously though - After seeing how well received your self-nomination post was I decided it would be better to sit this out.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:24 PM ^
I would have to think Leonardo Dicaprio has to be in the top 5
January 26th, 2015 at 12:26 PM ^
MIKE JONES
January 26th, 2015 at 12:35 PM ^
Mike Jones is incredible! Ah.........to have that life.......wow.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:35 PM ^
Whos got it beter than MIke Jones?
January 26th, 2015 at 12:36 PM ^
Body..................Noooooooooo way.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:27 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:59 PM ^
I'd much rather live a life similar to his as opposed to the other names tossed out.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:28 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:30 PM ^
"Here's to Bill Brasky!!"
January 26th, 2015 at 12:47 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:28 PM ^
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January 26th, 2015 at 12:31 PM ^
Those who do not marry will be champions.
Now run as fast as you can, and warn the others.
January 26th, 2015 at 1:14 PM ^
January 26th, 2015 at 12:37 PM ^
Cristiano Ronaldo
January 26th, 2015 at 12:40 PM ^
I'll throw John Mayer and Slash in there, although Slash got married.
January 26th, 2015 at 1:32 PM ^
Leo DiCaprio, 39
Tom Brady, 37
John Mayer (musician), 37
Christian Ronaldo (soccer), 29
Evan Spiegel (Stanford grad, handsome founder of Snapchat, worth billions, on paper), 24
Odell Beckham Jr (football, this kid is going to become a mega-star, has the "it" factor, and will take down every model and actress), 22
Harry Styles (One Direction boy band, highest grossing tour in the world the past two years, Taylor Swift and various models on his resume), 21
*Jeter was excluded because he's washed up, bloated and balding.
January 26th, 2015 at 12:49 PM ^
He's closing in on a billion dollars in the bank, married to Beyonce and he's a living legend.