Unverified Voracity Has Its Prostate In A Weird Place

Submitted by Brian on November 23rd, 2009 at 4:04 PM

Abbreviated.  A few site notes:

  • The offensive UFR for Wisconsin is basically done and will go up tomorrow.
  • Blog will be off Thursday and Friday for Thanksgiving; Wednesday will be light.
  • I've said I'd do last-game UFRs before and not come through so this isn't a promise, but I do intend to UFR this Ohio State game and I have a vague idea to go back and do the Citrus Bowl against Florida; last year's OSU game can get screwed.
  • This UV is abbreviated because I'll be on WTKA from 4-6. Please call in and be sane. 734 998-1050.

So happy together. Misopogon, who you may remember from such Russian novels diaries as "The Decimated Defense," "The Decimated Defense Part II," and "I Make Crazy Hennecharts" would like to trade in some his accumulated MGoGoodwill for material reward. Because he's a nice guy, he'd like that material reward to go to homeless families in Detroit. There's a diary post up about it; right now the donation system is pretty clunky—you call this nice lady—but I am hectoring them to set up a paypal account so the donations can be easy.

People: this is Mitch Albom's charity. I have a dream that Mitch shows up to this thing and he says "where did all this stuff come from" and Misopogon says "MGoBlog" and Mitch has this Christmas Carol-style conversion where he runs from blog to blog liberally spreading comments and goodwill. Do it for your country.

The Victors on an unusual object that makes noise. The thing on the left is a pipa, and it's pretty cool:

 

Marching band needs more pipa. Go comment flamewar!

Yeesh. I twittered about this but it bears repeating on the main site: holy mother of God, if Les Miles had done what he did against Ole Miss in a Michigan game blood would be spouting from my eyes and I would be groping my way to Ann Arbor Torch & Pitchfork only to find the shelves picked bare.

For those who missed it: LSU recovers an onside kick and drives to the Ole Miss 31 with around a minute left. Miles doesn't make the classic mistake a lot of coaches do and settle for a near 50-yard field goal from your college kicker, as Randy Edsall did earlier in the day, but wild blitzing from Ole Miss confuses the LSU QB and sacks and whatnot ensue. Before fourth and twenty-two there are 27 seconds left on the clock; there are 9 left when LSU uses its last timeout. LSU completes a bomb and then spikes the ball despite snapping it with one second left; in the aftermath Miles says he doesn't know who called for the spike.

Er:

Miles_Spike

New Les Miles theory: he makes a lot of correct decisions for the wrong reasons. Reasons like "my brain has a vas deferens."

The spike's not even the worst part, the worst part is the inexplicable timeout fiasco. Miles on that:

"Timeouts were being called verbally, but I didn't relate to the official apparently, and that was a mistake. We didn't know [the timeout] hadn't been called."

Has anyone ever seen this late in a game? Sometimes you'll see a coach not get the attention of an official in time—Like (sigh) Jim Tressel on Saturday—but when there's 30 seconds left the official has got to be expecting the TO call and waiting for it. Given the statement about the spike I'm a little leery of that explanation.

Of course, Rodriguez keeps pulling Forcier for Denard Robinson. That was basically waving the white flag on Saturday, but Forcier had coughed up four turnovers at that point. So… yeah, more understandable than whatever that was from Miles.

Death Star-sized LSU message board TigerDroppings is openly campaigning for a coach switch based on Terry Foster's extremely informed blog post about Rich Rodriguez's lack of job security…

Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez survived Bill Martin and Ohio State. He has survived President Mary Sue Coleman. But there could be one more hurdle.

Can he survive disgruntled big time boosters if they decide to withhold cash?

This story is not over. Despite claims otherwise I expect a few more cards to be played before the bowl season begins. The money men and women are not happy with Michigan's two-year record of 8-14. They are not thrilled to see Michigan finish last in a very mediocre Big Ten.

…in unrelated news, newspaper advertising has fallen almost $8 billion this year. There is literally nothing anyone can say that will stop uninformed speculation by Official Journalists about Rich Rodriguez getting fired.

Meanwhile, AnnArbor.com has a positive article on the fans' opinion of Rich Rodriguez. Freaky. Their highly unscientific, 683-vote poll currently has Rodriguez support running 2-to-1 in favor.

Wha happened? Jon Chait has an article on the Wolverine about what happened to the defense that's worth your time, though I disagree that the defensive line was a major problem except in certain situations where Craig Roh was overwhelmed by Wisconsin and a couple other teams. Probably 80% of the team's weakness against the run can be laid at the feet of the linebackers and safeties, as the frequent rotation at the end of the year indicated. No one was pulling Ryan Van Bergen off the field in favor of a walk-on.

Etc.: Jim Leavitt is a weird dude. Eye on Sports Media does a two-parter on Michigan opening up the press box to certain bloggers, including this siteBONUS: part one's title is piratey. Boring details on the AD search.

Comments

msoccer10

November 23rd, 2009 at 4:38 PM ^

That clock management by Les Miles was terrible. But he has been doing crazy stuff for years. In his national title run he lucked out not calling timeout and then chucking a ball deep to the end zone. That play made me not want him as a coach.

On a related note, did Rodriguez call our last timeout after Pryor had run out of bounds on third down with a minute and a half left? It wouldn't have made any difference but that seemed pretty stupid at the time.

Seth

November 23rd, 2009 at 4:41 PM ^

Not to burst the bubble-dream, Brian, but I've done this with Mitch for almost a decade now, and not once has he wondered where all the stuff came from.

Then again, if all the kids in the shelter are suddenly wearing maize and blue, we may get a nice column about it. Or he'll tell Sharp, and Sharp will write a column about how Michigan fans gave away all of their M schlock to the homeless because we're sick of the program.

Paypal account died with Volunteer Impact. Now it's "call the nice lady because her laptop died this week and I had to edit out all mentions of her e-mail"

oakapple

November 23rd, 2009 at 4:41 PM ^

Just to elaborate on Jonathan Chait's article:

I agree that, in the larger scheme of things, the defensive line was pretty good. If Michigan's secondary and linebackers could have played at the defensive line's level, you're probably looking at an 8-4 or 9-3 football team.

But let us not forget that, before Rodriguez arrived, 9-3 would have been considered a down year. Because there are so many defensive holes elsewhere, we are inclined to look at the line as a bright spot. But Rodriguez has said, "We need to get bigger on defense." Michigan won't match up with the elite teams in the conference without winning the defensive battle in the trenches.

ndjames86

November 23rd, 2009 at 7:19 PM ^

next year? We're losing our best player on defense and it doesn't really seem like we've got anyone right now to step up and fill the hole that BG is leaving? If we can cover anyone long enough next year maybe the dline can generate some more pressure but what about at LB? It would be nice to not see TEs and RBs gashing us up the middle next year.

ADingwall

November 23rd, 2009 at 4:42 PM ^

It was a Hail Mary. If the LSU pass is completed in the endzone, as was intended, Les Miles is seen in a completely different light. I'm just not sure this qualifies as poor coaching.

oakapple

November 23rd, 2009 at 5:11 PM ^

There is no excusing the 18 seconds that went by before LSU called its final timeout. That was really the major blunder.

The spike on the final play was probably a harmless error. When you have a first down inbounds with just one second remaining, it is usually not possible to get off a play. The ball needs to be snapped literally the instant the officials restart the clock, and it usually can't be done.

But it was an error nevertheless. There were at least 15-20 seconds of real time elapsed with the clock stopped, while the officials and the chain gang ran down the field to reset. It did not take any great insight to realize that a spike is the one thing they absolutely didn't want to do.

Kvothe

November 23rd, 2009 at 5:19 PM ^

He called for a spike with 1 second left because he didn't have his kicking unit ready. Calling for a spike w/ one second left is why it is such a bad coaching job. Obviously atleast one second goes off the clock when you line up and spike the ball.

ShockFX

November 23rd, 2009 at 5:52 PM ^

I'd reverse them. While the results were opposite, the losing 18 seconds because no one heard was the harmless error, IF LES GOES AND GETS THE TIME PUT BACK ON THE CLOCK. The spike shows actual poor coaching, because with 1 second left, there is absolutely NO chance you get a spike AND another play. The QB has to have something already called and get an instant snap, which might, just might let him throw one more pass.

I'm thinking more and more we dodged a bullet with Les. That's like the 4th "Fuck the heck" Les moment in the past 2 years.

Durham Blue

November 23rd, 2009 at 5:47 PM ^

The play calls that put LSU into 4th and 22 were horrendous. Letting 18 seconds elapse before getting a timeout was incredibly bad. All of that was the epitome of poor game management. Even if LSU would've miraculously won, it was still poor game management.

Wolverine318

November 23rd, 2009 at 4:42 PM ^

Can someone with hacker knowledge do something to knock off the power to 97.1? Foster and Valenti have been spending the last couple hours spouting off pure hate and OK! Magazine level rumors.

Wolverine318

November 23rd, 2009 at 5:41 PM ^

Just the usual sparty BS. Foster saying boosters will push rich out before next season. Then valenti continues to day that Gardner will not come to Michigan to play for a lane duck coach. There have been a couple intelligent Michigan callers but the two morons brush them aside with misleading comments and flat out lies.

st barth

November 23rd, 2009 at 5:11 PM ^

...les miles is not our coach. man is crazy.

personally, i think we'll see a lot more support for Rodriguez as we move forward. now that we've all been through two difficult seasons together if feels like there is nowhere to go but up.

i'm disappointed we didn't win on saturday because i predicted a 34-10 M victory...but minus the turnovers, i might have actually been correct. it was a shame i had to miss the game (not on french tv) but lunch at sereno was delightful. hopefully next year i can catch the victory somewhere. my early prediction is that M wins 34-10 in columbus. Go Blue & Hail to the Victors!!!

brianshall

November 23rd, 2009 at 6:59 PM ^

Brian,
probably my last post cause while we are allowed to call great Michigan Men like Les Miles or Jim Harbaugh anything terrible and supposed to take some sort of joy from their losses we are not allowed to simply say we are frustrated with all this losing from our own team. Le sigh.

But...went to the game last Saturday and, as with all returning alumni, had to buy M apparel. Dropped $225 at M DEN. Now, I may have done this anyway but made sure to go there cause of your site. I mentioned it to the kid working the counter. He looked at me as if I was speaking whatever language he doesn't speak.

Let M DEN know their sponsorship is working!

jmblue

November 24th, 2009 at 8:05 AM ^

A great Michigan Man does not trash the academic integrity of the school and its athletic department. He also does not spread rumors to recruits everywhere that Lloyd Carr has Parkinson's so they won't go to Michigan. Harbaugh and Miles forfeited their M-Man status a long time ago.

BlueGoM

November 23rd, 2009 at 7:26 PM ^

Can he survive disgruntled big time boosters if they decide to withhold cash?

Warning, rant below:

Any freaking moron who stops donating to the university based on the football team is a clown. You donate to the university because you care about the facilities, you care about education, you care about the university hospitals, you care about the people working and studying there, you care about making the University of Michigan being the top notch university that it is.

If you stop sending money to the University because BAW FOOTBALL TEAM NOT DO GOOD then I think perhaps the University is better off without you.

/end rant

Heinous Wagner

November 23rd, 2009 at 9:39 PM ^

"New Les Miles theory: he makes a lot of correct decisions for the wrong reasons. Reasons like 'my brain has a vas deferens.'"

Now I need aspirin after laughing for five minutes at that Terry Pratchett-worthy line.