Senior Day Haiku 2011
I should point you to Seth's three-part senior goodbyes, which are far better than these goofy haiku and reminded me there is a "tloy wolfork" tag. Haikus not guaranteed to be 5-7-5 but I tried.
Nuclear winter's
survivors are few and wan
cockroaches, Huyge
Steve Watson
This year's Jack Shaftoe
The king of the vagabonds
Hair of Norse legend
Brandon Herron
Two touchdowns, one game
then detached, floating to ground
a serene finish
Ryan Van Bergen
Axes ring, crash and thump
Poplars topple, maples fall
Van Bergen stands, still
Fall takes leaves from trees
and leaves defensive tackle
face down, defeated
John McColgan
Spread fullback in bloom
Your existential crisis
will be no problem
Will Heininger
The Mini-Kovacs
Except insofar as he's
the Maxi-Kovacs
Jared Van Slyke
Things can be worse than
saying "yes, yes, that Van Slyke":
Michael Jackson's kid
Ankle, wrist, ankle
people who call you "Woolfork"
TWoolf ain't easy
Junior Hemingway
Throw it up, way up
in clouds a man emerges
hands grasping his prize
Kelvin Grady
Suns collide, stars burst
the duality of man
Grady wallpaper
Kevin Koger
Picked M over O
In a rare, rare time for that
Payoff Saturday
The earth moves in waves
There is a man, then a gap,
then there is nothing
JB Fitzgerald
To take the fail rays
Head on for four of five years
Invincible now
Michael Shaw
BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE
occasionally jet straight
BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE BOUNCE
Martavious Odoms
The first mountain goat
Survived Northwestern '08
Headbutts victory
Tom Pomarico
So, I hear you're a
Long snapper. How's that going?
Cool, cool. I am a—
November 25th, 2011 at 4:40 PM ^
I like it.
November 25th, 2011 at 4:41 PM ^
but they all looked 5-7-5 to me. Good job, I thoroughly enjoy reading these every year. GO BLUE! BEAT OHIO!
November 25th, 2011 at 4:59 PM ^
In just a few months
<br>Will be harder to get laid
<br>Screw many chicks now
November 25th, 2011 at 5:04 PM ^
James Taranto of the WSJ writes "Bye-ku"s when candidates drop out of the presidential primaries.
November 25th, 2011 at 5:17 PM ^
November 25th, 2011 at 5:36 PM ^
Michael Shaw haiku made me laugh. Kevin Koger haiku made me feel like crying.
BEAT OHIO.
November 25th, 2011 at 5:55 PM ^
For the Neal Stephenson ref. (and the possible implication that you slogged through the the entire trilog)y:
or should I say
Nice Quicksilver ref
but if you ask me those books
were just too damn long
November 25th, 2011 at 6:02 PM ^
Although if you just read Cryptonomicon you're doing OK.
November 25th, 2011 at 5:59 PM ^
Key Wisky TD
Inaugurates career.
Please don't be done yet.
November 25th, 2011 at 6:01 PM ^
Affably signing
autographs, double-M's skin
was strangely not green
November 25th, 2011 at 6:58 PM ^
Michael Shaw's Haiku might be best Haiku ever
November 25th, 2011 at 8:35 PM ^
I have to say that I honestly feel endeared to this team of players more so than any other team that has donned the winged helmets. They are truly a band of brothers that has weathered the storm together. A win against Ohio State will be a great way to end this chapter of their lives. Mike Martin, Van Bergen, Koger, Molk, Woolfolk I have never rooted for any one thing so hard in my life as I have for this team of seniors. Tomorrow will be no different. Give 'em hell guys. Show them that that school up north is back. Meechigan, why would you want to go anywhere else?
November 25th, 2011 at 8:53 PM ^
The Mike Martin one is my favorite! Let's see him do that tomorrow!
November 25th, 2011 at 10:30 PM ^
Got a good chuckle out of the RVB one. He probably wears flannel under his pads.
November 25th, 2011 at 11:13 PM ^
Love the haiku, Brian. I hope everyone chimes in with their own, and after tomorrow’s win we can all put up our best Muppet haiku (I have a huge stash I’m willing to share). In the meantime, it’s worth pointing out that the 17-syllable “rule” of haiku is not really a rule. Haiku can be much shorter. You can make a haiku with whatever ingredients you want, but generally the most important ingredient to a good haiku is to use two images or thoughts, separated with a pause meant to give the reader an insight. So there you have it, everyone, chime in and don’t fret the 17-syllable rule.
November 26th, 2011 at 8:40 AM ^
November 26th, 2011 at 9:39 PM ^
start with the horror
endure, persevere, fight, stay
become champions
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