Senior Day Haiku
Reviving a tradition I did not execute last year: haikus for the graduating scholarship seniors, and other notables. Those with remaining eligibility are omitted.
Mike Massey
You'll probably be
a fancy suit stock broker
so it's not all bad
Will Johnson
Centers never knew
they could be so afraid of
a balding tackle
Tim Jamison
In your younger days
I thought you would be a ninja
or maybe a bear
Charles Stewart
Suggest you cover
deep routes in life, so, like
get health insurance
Morgan Trent
Bet it's annoying
that everyone says you have
a smoking hot mom
Brandon Harrison
You committed to
Tyrone Willingham, which, like
makes you a rare bird
Jason Gingell
No one blames you, man
we all know Crable messed up
if that helps any. No?
Brandon Logan
That Kentucky raid
you played the most from it
it didn't work out
Johnny Thompson
There are worse things than
having an awesome nickname
like "The Machete"
Ohene Opong-Owusu
Did you know your name,
Ohene Opong-Owu-
su, doesn't fit here?
Austin Panter
You'll be a footnote
"First M JUCO in ten years"
So congrats I guess
Terrance Taylor
What do you get when
you cross a bear, a hydrant,
and a six foot smile?
KC Lopata
Kicking competency
is underrated these days
but I recall Brabbs
UPDATE: (whoops!)
Doug Dutch
Small, nimble slot guy
You showed at Michigan
four years too early


Couldn't resist when this came to mind, for Opong-Owusu:
If a bigger star
Hawaiian War Chant would change
to recite your name
from "Kicking competency" to "Kicking competence" and you're good to go with the old school Japanese style haiku.
i'd be more impressed with senior villanelles
this reminds me of
gregg easterbrook, which is not
a compliment, yuk
?
It's not like he did creepy haiku's for his favorite cheerleaders.
No question, Jim.
i'm sure you can deal with the horror of a haiku post every year.
MGoBlog | Sporting News | HTTV 2009 | e
You mean "The Progress Paradox -- How Life Gets Better While People Feel Worse"?
Yeah, that is my license plate.
Steve Brown, you are not
a senior yet somehow the
man still keeps you down.
Austin Panter, you
dominated JUCO ball
at least you have that.
Recruiting is a
joke because you were a top
prep wide out, Doug Dutch
Harvard: The MICHIGAN of the East
We're not arrogant, we're just better.
Human Beings are actually counting all the syllables of all the poems and then posting the results!!
Another sign of the "End of Times"!!
Yeah, that is my license plate.
It's just so rare than we can catch Brian in an obvious error! Why, here it's as easy as throwing an accurate bubble screen. Oh wait...
Also, 6 syllables on the last line of the Gingell poem. Still very funny though. All of them. I love the old David Harris one.
Brian, now see what you've gone and done -- you've started the Haiku Idol thread -- no one will survive!!
Yeah, that is my license plate.
Good Riddance Masseys,
Your next brother do please tell
Go to OSU!
http://www.notqualifiedtocomment.com/
yeah he's kinda slow
but ill always remember
58 yarder!
and johnny thompson:
pass defense? not much.
but look out, because here comes
buffalo stampede!
You forgot one:
Sean Griffin (LS):
You're the long snapper.
I've never thought about you.
Therefore: good job, Sean
Alternate:
Morgan Trent:
Henson, Helminen
Took the cash and ran. Not you.
The Pride of Brighton!
This one was still the best ever:
David Harris:
On one of these days
You are going to kill someone.
I'm okay with that.
i am really tired
of seeing that 3 jersey
in the highlight reels
"I thought you would be a ninja"
Can I not count or is that 8 syllables?
And how many of you just counted with your fingers? Cuz I know I did.
The 5-7-5 is for Japanese haiku, Brian uses American haiku!
Besides, how can poetry have rules???
Yeah, that is my license plate.
Yes, it is 8. And yes, I counted on my fingers.
Contract "you would" to "you'd".
FTW!
Harvard: The MICHIGAN of the East
We're not arrogant, we're just better.