The difference between this season and 2009-'10: 100 percent more Jug.}
Photo: Eric Upchurch.

[ED: LATE BREAKING is this week's edition of Pick Six.]

Michigan is 5-0 and beat a Big Ten team 58-0. The only thing tempering effusive celebration and Pasadenic predictions right now is Michigan made it to 5-0 last year too. Quick this year v. last year table (EDIT: now FIXED):

I realigned '10 a bit to kinda sorta match the level of competition (so like beating up on BGSU = beating up on Minnesota) but last year had two road games. It also had an FCS team put up 37 and Indiana put up 35, while the season on the right side seems to keep getting better as it goes along. "This isn't last year!" was this week's rallying cry in the diaries, where justingoblue is trying to figure out how tough the schedule has been so far, and 909Dewey is taking way too small sample sizes to put 58-0 over Minnesota in the context of Michigan 2005-present.

Blazefire is preparing himself for a "Rationality Juncture," ie the swings that sports fandom brings:

We are fans because we believed that a five foot ninja could stop North Dakota. We are fans because we believed Darius Morris would shoot successfully. We are fans because we believed in 30 seconds.

This one paragraph puts him in the running for Diarist of the Week. Of course he wouldn't have a chance except BlueSeoul is exempt from winning. That does not exempt you from reading his latest masterpiece Game Wraps:

Little Brown Jug Total Gopher Destructo, with pics:

MSU-OSU Total Rival Self-Destructo, with pics:

How we know it's not 2010: Michigan State actually played Ohio State.

While we're on the subject of Mansmash vs. Brotough, see if you can guess which of the following names are 2013 prospects recently profiled by Ace, and which are MST3K space jocks:

Laquon Treadwell	Fist Rockbone	Brick Hardmeat	Lump Beefbroth
Blast Hardcheese	Stump Beefnoss	Taco Charlton	Shaq Wiggins
De'Niro Laster	Smash Lampjaw	Wit Slagcheek	Touch Rustrod
Slap Bulkhead	Punch Rockgroin	Punch Sideiron	Reif Blastbody
Bold Bigflank	Buck Plankchest	Gristle McThornbody	Big McLargehuge
Splint Chesthair	Stump Junkman	Blake Fistcrunch	Jake Butt
Flint Ironstag	Dirk Hardpeck	Buff Hardpack	Smoke Manmuscle
Bolt Vanderhuge	Tom Tyner	Bob Johnson	Beat Punchbeef
Thick McRunfast	Rip Steakface	Blast Thickneck	Hack Blowfist
Buff Drinklots	Blake Slamrock	Crunch Buttsteak	Roll Fizzlebeef
Grunt Slamchest	Rod Bonemeal	Slabs Quadthrust	Jus Gritzer

Big McLargehuge has camped at Michigan but needs to improve his shape before he earns a Michigan offer. This week's points bonus opportunity goes to whoever can best apply the above names to characters from this year's OSU-MSU debacle. Last week's goes to Gwhizz for his chewbacca costume.

After the jump, more evidence that 2011 =/= 2010, and more diaries.

If It Was 2010, You Would Still Be Reading UFRs on the Front Page

 WolverineBlue has a new way for you to experience Upon Further Review. Minnesota O and D are up, though before I could copyedit these. If this counts as a diary—all posts were technically in the board—it's easily Diarist of the Week.

Also Danger Chris of Chrisical Logic has moving picture pages of Two Way Hopkins Part the First and Two Way Hopkins Part the Second.

If it was 2010 You'd Only Have One Wallpaper
…and It Would Be from MonuMental:

Now you have two three options.

Left is a wallpaper from Blue Indy. Right is another wallpaper from cjm, who made a light version too.

Thanks to the magic of Windows 7 I have cjm-dark rockin' at night, cjm-light in the a.m., and Blue Indy's in the afternoon. In other things this week that are weekly, Lordfoul's lessons post compares Fitz Toussaint to A-Train. I 100% co-sign on his Mattison take, but I choose to wait a bit more before I go all Hoke=Bo:

Hoke isn't making Michigan great again by being an innovator on either side of the ball; he is acquiring the best available parts, constructing a beast-machine, and driving the thing to eventual domination.

Bo came in by Bear Bryant-ing the hell out of the (140-man) roster until the doctors, lawyers and scientists* were gone and all that were left were champions. Hoke's upside is more…Joe Paterno? Chuck Noll? Saintly, utterly competent cathedral builder who takes over the rubble of a mad genius and keeps the magnificent transept while reshaping the stones into a nave that doesn't kill the patrons? Yeah that one.

ST3's Inside the Box score thinks Roh got shafted by the L in "TFL." The Upset Watch by maize_in_Spartyland this week has Air Force giving Notre Dame a hard time, but doesn't even mention turnovers. Enjoy Life is still doing such as Turnover Analysis tacks on another fumble-after-1st and Avery's runback. The Ugly Game of the Week by stubob called DotW and probably right about Minnesota-Purdue.

And if you haven't seen it yet, before the game check out mgoweather's weekly game day updates from a real life meterologist.

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* I remember this with "and captains of industry" in it…?

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If it Was 2010 the Best of Board Would Have Way More Swearing and Way Less Ohio Stadenfreude

WANTED: COMPETENT COORDINATOR TO COACH FUTURE NUCLEAR TEST SITE

NeilGoBlue found a job available in Columbus. I screen-grabbed earlier today when I figured Craigslist would get wise but as of 12 a.m. Friday you can still apply.

 

BO HATED THE WAVE, AND OTHER TALES

WolverineInABag asked and several responded with some great a-Bo-logues. There's the one with the wave. The one where he told a Catholic School to change their fight song. The one with the mustaches. The one with the young lady wearing an ND shirt. Lots more. The one where Michigan "wasn't ready" for Northwestern. I have no way of verifying this one but it feels legit and you should read it.

HOW DOES THE DIAMOND THINGY NUMBER 2 FRITZ WORK?

MGoDC noted there are alignmen t rules for the new alignment:

To me it seems like if Fitz were on one side and Vincent Smith were on the other with Denard in the deep spot (where Fitz is in the actual formation) that there would still be the easy pitch option to the outside if Devin rolls out either direction but if it goes to the deep man (Robinson) there would still be a solid lead block from Fitz or Smith regardless of the direction of the play. Obviously Denard can block for Fitz if the play shifted his direction but I would assume this is not something the coaches would have him do in an ideal situation.

As commenters noted it makes more sense to have Denard lined up where he is both a run option and a pass option—the tailback in this formation is doing what coined the name "fullback"; he is the north-south threat. Magnus wants Denard kept to the left because that makes him the most dangerous passing option, though this would limit the formation's Denard-in-the-Open factor from the right hash. This makes me wonder: among Borges's throwing running backs, are any of them left-handed? I could just see the BlueSeoul caption: GARDNER HAS IT WAIT NO DENARD HAS IT WAIT NO TOUSSAINT HAS IT RUN! NO PASS SHIT!

IF WE DON'T HAVE A MASCOT CAN I HAVE THE TICKETS?

HT: goblue7612. The Michigan/Bama game next year has contract language giving Michigan free entry and reserved seating for "mascots." Freakout follows. SagNasty increased the fear factor by finding a fuzzy kiddie hat (pictured above).

POLL: WE LIKE THE NUMBERS ON THE HELMETS

Poll posted by rtyler currently has a small majority pro-numero.

SOMEBODY PLEASE GIF THIS KTHX

Blue in Seattle got a vid clip to show Mr. Brandon what young Michigan fans really think of mascots.

MSU FAN HAS RATIONAL OPINION ABOUT MICHIGAN

Aptly named RationalMSUfan is aptly named. I have a soft spot for rival fans who come here and play nice. Rational analysis in the comments follows. In a week the RCMB clan will arrive, my in-box will fill with requests to change my password, and this guy and WatersDemos will be forgotten. In another thread, we discover how Mark Dantonio trolled Fickell.

DON'T MISS THIS OSU SCHADENFREUDE

Sad Buckeye is 791 words of sad. HT: no joke its hoke.

DYK: ATHLETIC DIRECTORS ARE MILLIONAIRES

Gene Smith is bringing in 7 figures for ruining Ohio State.

Etc. 03 Blue 07 is reading Three and Out but I didn't read his diary because I'd be reading it now if I wasn't linking to your damn diary man. Not touching the Denard Twitter Hack even if it was possible to touch Denard.