Specials at Urban Meyer's restaraunt...
Ok folks,, let's see your creativity. If you didn't see it, Uncle Urbz is opening a restaraunt in Columbus, complete with a room dedicated to his record vs Michigan.
Your charge is to name some of the menu items...
My offering, a daily special...
Spotted Dick.
Will under the table payments include one for an abortion for the waitress he banged in a back room? Oh wait...that was Rick Pitino. Can't keep all these corrupt coaches straight.
Zach Smith's Golden Fried Cock Onion Rings
Note: Edited
It loses a bit in the joke when you have to explain it...
Better?
For desert "Sack of Shitcicles"
Snake Oil and Mushroom Soup?
cooler brownies ...too appeal to the locals' taste
Chefs Surprise: the chef decides how important you are to winning football games then gives you a meal to reflect that.
The Zach Smith cover up: only the finest, 15-year aged, spam, smoothered in gravy from a packet, topped with a flaming saganaki (to distract you from all the crimes occuring beneath the surface)
Sad Tunnel Golf Cart Pizza
The Urban Liar Platter. So much crap on it, you won’t believe it. Hard to digest.
Douchebag Pot Pie, and a Crooked Pint with which to wash it down.
Ain't come here to play school gruel
Authentic New York pizza made with integrity.
*Actually frozen Sbarro
Wife's Lip-Smacking Ribs
Coed creampie and a heart attack on a plate hamburger
Tebow's "touched by an angel" wings with Hernandez's "dropped the soap" sauce
Tolerance Tacos, Memory Meatballs, and if you can finish the Ballgag Burger it’s on the house
“Pain in the Brain” Frozen Margarita
Anything "Extra Cheesy"
The rotten clams is the first that came to mind
Concerning the bathrooms... Just a couple coolers inside.
Urbs Lie-Lasagna with Garlic bread topped with Tressel tat-tored chesse.
Dessert included which is Gene Smith's $100 hand shake pie.
Coach Urban Meyer cream pie
Ohio is such a messed up state. Good freeways though.
adultery anti-pasto
cheatin' chili fries
Tonight’s special: Shelley looks the other way while Urban rails the hostess in the coat room.
Mystery Illness Burger with Zach Smith's Signature Sauce.
It comes with Suspended Fries and a Gene Smith Dip, the base for which is sucked off the current head of the football program each day regardless of who it is..
Lonely pizza , only sold by the slice, because you are a loser who has no friends and no one likes you . Only comes with ham and pineapple on it .
Grilled cheats sandwich?
A Tebow steak .
USC Nachos
Look the Other Wagyu Beef Filet
Zach's black"eyed" peas
I'd Toss Nicki's Salad.
Felon fries, overflowing with Urbz' Can't Remember Ranch
Meyer's Fryers for Liars and Priors.
Zach Smith's world famous battered fish. Lots of battering.
As a courtesy, the Maitre-d’ will happily delete all the text messages on you or your guest’s cell phones
Spotted Dick happens to be the best selling flasher/meat rig combo on our site.
Griesedeick would be a good name. Original name of Fallstaff beer.
Greasy Weenier. One of our rescue weeniedogs looks like he got into some motor oil.
Hope the dick serves hotdogs.
Well the Michigan room needs to have a giant screen with a loop all the horrible ref calls that cost us and changed history, including the tell tale butt pat, set to I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends (did you neeeeed anybody, Urbie The Cheatbug?)
Urban's Tube Steak
You’re getting that confused with the short ribs.
Maybe. I heard it's a 2 oz. filet.
Sad pizza.
Text-message Strip Steak. Maximum age one year.
"The 62-39"
Soft belly of pork, crushed pepper, smashed potatoes, creamed spinach topped with whipped butter cream and sea salt.
I hear the gator is killer.
2016 Pass Interference: A load of crap, fresh from the cooler, served by a man dressed as a referee who is looking the other way as he places it on the table.