OT: Cleveland Clinic Doctor reports 50% increase in vasectomies for March Madness
"We do have [in March] typically about 50 percent more vasectomies than in other months," Dr. Ed Sabanegh, chairman of the Department of Urology at the Cleveland Clinic, told CNN. "A lot of patients come in and say, 'I have to have this during March Madness, you have to talk to my wife about it. Tell her what my limitations are and that I need to be on the couch.'
Sweet, fancy Moses! This article seems like mgoboard gold, Jerry (The last two lines are Seinfeld references for the younger generation).
I'm curious to see the responses. Will it be Oiho jokes? Will it be shots on me for posting something so stupid? Who will be the first to post their own vasectomy "Cool story, bro" anecdote? EDIT: mGrowOld = Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner!
Link?
http://www.philly.com/philly/sports/colleges/20140327_Men_undergoing_va…
March 27th, 2014 at 10:49 AM ^
I saw something similar last week...and I find it hysterical. For my money, I'd like to have it done the day before the Masters starts. But that's just me.
March 27th, 2014 at 10:57 AM ^
Good. It's about time people in Ohio starting sterilizing themselves.
I wouldn't go that far....
But if you love March Madness enough to get a vasectomy, yet aren't man enough to tell your boss and wife you are taking two personal days, then they may as well just fully lop off your balls, as you're clearly not using them.
March 27th, 2014 at 11:00 AM ^
I prefer to just do the normal thing and schedule vacation time during the first week of the tourney. No sharp implements next to my "boys" needed in order to watch the first rounds of the tourney from the comfort of my couch...
March 27th, 2014 at 12:14 PM ^
March 27th, 2014 at 12:55 PM ^
You could accidentally have a kid.
I know.
Can you buy an apostrophe?
March 27th, 2014 at 11:01 AM ^
March 27th, 2014 at 11:44 AM ^
Didn't even read your comment, but I'm upvoting you purely because of your avatar...buddy. Just know that random upvotes to your comments, even when seemingly undeserving, will probably just be me admiring said avatar again...guy.
March 27th, 2014 at 11:59 AM ^
And I gave you one because.. well.. It's Always Sunny is the best comedy on television. So back at ya, budday.
btw- gamefaqs?
Get a room, you two.
March 27th, 2014 at 11:01 AM ^
March 27th, 2014 at 11:06 AM ^
Remember that Michigan does rely heavily on "smart" Ohio males to come to Michigan to play football. We don't want to ruin that.
March 27th, 2014 at 11:04 AM ^
10 am tomorrow. Wanted it scheduled last friday but it was booked solid. If I have to get it done, and I do, then what better time? Masters would be good as well.
Born in Michigan, now live in Cleveland.
March 27th, 2014 at 11:39 AM ^
May the god of ice packs be ever on your (bottom) side.
March 27th, 2014 at 11:05 AM ^
I have a vasectomy story. When I had mine done many years ago here in Ohio it was the week of the OSU game and I was wearing a Michigan sweatshirt. After I got the local I was lying on the table looking up and all around the edges of the wall where it meets the ceiling were pictures of West Virginia stadium, football players and the West Virginia team. Clearly my doc went to West Virginia.
When he came in to do the procedure he got started and then he saw my sweatshirt and said "Michigan man are you? I hear that's where you have to go if you cant get into a real school." My clever response was "That's true. To show you how bad things were for me the college counselor at my High School said if I didnt get into Michigan I'd have to go to WEST VIRGINIA" and then I laughed at how clever my comeback was.
He then said - "You guys from Michigan truly are dumb. I am literally holding your BALLS in my hand and you're cracking on my school" and then he showed them to me! I immediately apologized and asked him if we wouldnt mind putting them back into me.
March 27th, 2014 at 11:31 AM ^
He had your literal balls, outside of their respective sack, in his hands and then proceeded to show them to you?
March 27th, 2014 at 11:54 AM ^
That's disgusting.
March 27th, 2014 at 12:27 PM ^
No....it was terrifying.
March 27th, 2014 at 12:43 PM ^
Those balls went from the doctor straight to your wife.
March 27th, 2014 at 12:32 PM ^
That is a pretty good story and the doc played along with you as well. How long did it take for you to recover? Was a bag of peas your best friend?
About two-three days and yes on the bag of peas (took me a minute to remember what you were referring to). I had mine done to coincide with the OSU game (away) cause the advice was "do absolutely nothing for two days" and I knew I could pull that off.
The real question is how long it took you to check that the doctor had in fact put everything back in it's correct place...
March 27th, 2014 at 11:18 AM ^
All Ohio jokes aside, choosing to schedule your vasectomy during March Madness is a great idea.
Also, Grantland had an article about this yesterday: http://grantland.com/features/ncaa-tournament-vasectomy-trend-oregon-ma…
March 27th, 2014 at 11:23 AM ^
I don't have offspring yet, but the time is arriving where I will have to or lose everything. I prefer to have none, but I have agreed to only one. Once that is done, I'm getting snipped.
March 27th, 2014 at 12:27 PM ^
Not to get all mushy on this light-hearted convo, but having kids is the greatest thing you can do on this planet. Seriously, nothing will make you happier. I'm glad you agreed to have one, but you might change your mind and go for two.
March 27th, 2014 at 12:34 PM ^
I am on the other end of it but I would like to hear why you think that if you wouldn't mind indulging me.
That's a long, emotional conversation that's difficult to put into words to begin with, but having and raising kids is an absolute joy and the biggest challenge/reward you will ever have. You (and presumably your partner) shape the life of another human being (or beings) who love you like crazy. You have a much bigger purpose than you ever had before.
That sounds like a best case scenario in which the child doesn't have birth defects, autism (which is now 1 in 68), or is just a complete asshole even though you've done everything right. I plan on having kids and I agree with your sentiment seeing as how my sister and I have turned out healthy and loving towards our parents but it seems like more of a gamble now than it has been in the past in reference to abnormalities.
Certainly kids with disabilities are more of a challenge, but I don't think that changes the equation any. I don't think what I wrote supposes any best case scnario at all. That stuff is automatic. You can decide to be an asshole dad, but how your child turns out, health-wise, won't affect the emotional side of it.
March 27th, 2014 at 12:37 PM ^
Maybe it's the greatest thing you can do for yourself, but it's certainly not the greatest thing you can do for the world. We need fewer humans on this planet, not more.
That's a fair point. But driving my car to work isn't great for the world either, but almost all of us still do it. And I don't think raising a couple kids in the suburbs is the cause of world population problems.
I 100% agree with you re kids, have three of my own from my first marrage and adopted my wife's son. The best way I can describe why I like being a father is that there's a child-sized space inside me that can only be filled through the love I have for that child. And until I had the child I had no idea the space even existed. And each child filled a particular space inside of me perfectly.
I understand why those without children would question what's so great about being a dad (or mom). They don't know yet they have a space inside them that needs to be filled.
. . . said Riply to the android Bishop.
So you're saying the greatest thing to do for the world is become a serial killer or genocidal dictator?
Undoubtedly.
No politics please.
Whatever parents have to tell themselves to keep sane, I'm all for.
Having kids is both awesome and terrible. Babies are amazingly cute and you cant help but love the hell out of them, but holy shit they're a lot of work. It all kinda evens out. Supposedly, the happiest people are couples without kids.
What parent is going to say, "Yeah, I have kids, and they're little shits. Ruined my life."?
As a parent of 3 daughters, all grown and out of the house, I can say that I love my kids and they are wonderful humans. I am glad I had them--now. I'm in awe that they are so wonderful and I'd be proud to have them as friends even if they weren't related.
If you'd gotten me drunk when they were adolescents, I'd have sold them into slavery or admitted that they had ruined my life.
Parenthood is not for the prudent, because a prudent person knowing what kids are like wouldn't have them. Kids are for the young and stupid, like I was. With that said, I also think that they can bring out the best in a person, and I'm a better person for having had them. So yes, I'm glad I had them. Like being glad for a root canal. Much better after it's done.
Oh, and my kids would probably agree with everything I just said.