this week in unintentionally grim-sounding recruiting headlines
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|6 weeks 3 days ago||Caption||
"Mark Dantonio unhappy being at the center of the table. Wanted to be seated in a small chair off to side to enhance his team's belief that they are disrespected."
|13 weeks 3 days ago||New ad campaign I'm pitching ...||
|18 weeks 3 days ago||Calculation based on Peppers...||
Number of times you thought player is awesome while on team = 400.
Will be awesome on team times 0.5 = 730 * 0.5 = 365.
Awesome pro career = 10 years * 365 / 30 = 121.7
Result of addition (not specified?) divided by people wearing jersey = 886.7 / 20 = 44.3.
I live in Ann Arbor so multiplying 44.3 by 50% fans = 22.15.
Subtract percentage for each year over 14 = 22 - 22.15 = DO NOT WEAR JERSEY
|19 weeks 4 days ago||I hope Miller ..||
I hope Miller ends up being as successful as Nacho Man some day, with a prestigious grad degree, major property holdings in Ann Arbor, and a low body fat percentage.
|19 weeks 6 days ago||Stone sells a beer specifically saying you need to cellar it...||
|21 weeks 3 days ago||Is there a loophole||
Is there a loophole in the Google policy for sexybits that are not blatantly sexybits to the eyes, but could potentially be sexybits to the imagination of somebody like Jacobear?
|23 weeks 4 days ago||(No subject)||
|30 weeks 6 days ago||Somebody already did this...||
I was at the Indiana game with a buddy and there was somebody about 20 rows in front of us dressed in the game gear, headset and all. Everyone was cheering at him as he walked up the steps at halftime to presumably get a free hot dog.
|31 weeks 13 hours ago||Poor bastards never stood a chance...||
All this additional traffic was too much for the old computer. Whenever I think of the edge of the internet board, it will remind me of my days hosting a BBS.
|31 weeks 4 days ago||What I want to know is....||
Brian references a lot of stuff from the end of the internet, but why do they reference him as Funky?
|31 weeks 6 days ago||Man.. I thought for sure I'd be the first...||
To make a Harbaugh joke.
|32 weeks 5 days ago||OP fumbled the snap on this one for sure...||
|37 weeks 6 days ago||Wait a second...||
If I take the following sentences:
And the sources are me talking to myself and my interpretation of the hand gestures just made by the peek-a-boo bear.
But a rumor is a rumor so there must be some truth to it.
And then I rearrange the letters using an algorithm I came up with after drinking assorted beers brewed near San Francisco, I find the hidden statement:
Harbaugh rumor is true and the sources are not me talking to myself. Peek-a-boo bye.
It really is happening.
|38 weeks 3 days ago||Yes, I concur...||
In hindsight, more subtle grave dancing is in order. My attempt was a little too in your face...
|38 weeks 3 days ago||Interesting...||
Schlissel said Brandon decided to resign and he accepted it. I wonder how it would go if I went to my boss, said I wanted to resign my duties, and asked for $600k+ per year for the next four years?
|38 weeks 3 days ago||It's far away and all, but ....||
Edit: too soon apparently.
|38 weeks 3 days ago||Who's taking the first shift?||
I think everyone here needs to start taking shifts to guard WD's house for the next year. I have a feeling a drunk Dave Brandon might show up at some point looking for him...
|38 weeks 4 days ago||NO ENTRY||
Doesn't really count since I wasn't there, but a friend of mine did one of the crazier things I've heard of one night we were all out. Here's a quick recap:
It was a cool Fall evening after a nice win over Michigan State in East Lansing ....... (intended pause to soak in the nostalgia and remember what those days felt like) ....... My roommates and I had gone over to a friend's house and were drinking all afternoon with another friend who had driven over with a buddy he had visiting from high school.
We got up to leave after the game and when we started walking home, the other kid realized his car was gone. He had put it at a meter, didn't remember or care enough to go back out and put money in. Apparently he did that pretty often because he had a large number of unpaid parking tickets that resulted in him getting towed. He was pissed, we laughed at him, and then went our separate ways.
Fast-forward to 3:30am when one of our phones starts ringing. My roomate answers, says "WTF? Huh? Where? Ok", hangs up, and then tells us we have to go to the police station. After a long evening at the bar bitching about the towing, my friend decided the best idea was to go to the tow lot, climb the fence through the barbed wire, and take his car back.
He always claimed they cut the lock, got the gate open, and drove away, eventually having a cop pull them over because the tow company called it in, thus arresting him for stealing his own car. I don't buy that part though because he would've been hit with DUI for sure and been in a lot more trouble, but last I talked to him years ago he stuck to it. I personally believe he got arrested while in the tow lot trying to figure out how to get his car out, but that isn't quite as good of a story.
|39 weeks 11 hours ago||Double post ...||
The internets are not executing well right now. In practice these "Save" clicks on Chrome work great, but when game time comes it shits the bed.
|39 weeks 12 hours ago||I heard from a guy ...||
That he was waiting on final votes from the triumverate to see if he could change his name to AloofWolverine before posting again...
|39 weeks 4 days ago||Maybe Brian isn't responding because...||
He's got his team asking Nick Burns for tech support?
|39 weeks 4 days ago||Don't fall for it....||
There is no such thing as the Internet Police. Just because you were looking at leaked iPhone pics/vids does not mean you're going to jail.
|39 weeks 5 days ago||Alejandro...||
He sure is at the wrong place at the right times recently. He sent out the pics of the Coke promotion and now sends out pics from the Diag painted green? Hmm. Coincidence? Or master saboteur?
|39 weeks 6 days ago||Whew.....||
I only use $9 a month as toilet paper (plus 95 cents as a massaging agent). Glad I don't fall into that elitist bucket of douches you're pointing at.
|41 weeks 6 days ago||Cheer up, kid, we've got new uniforms this weekend!||
|42 weeks 5 days ago||I think Dracula's Lament is most appropriate..|
|43 weeks 3 days ago||Hearing Dave Brandon is channeling Mr. Alan now...||
|43 weeks 5 days ago||Only a +1 for Jourdan Lewis on that play?||
Peppers got a +2 for essentially doing his job in press coverage on a play last week. Lewis only gets a +1 this week when he sprints from the opposite side of the field, past the WRs, and saves a TD after essentially running 70 yards to catch a free running RB? That tells me how down you are on Michigan right now, man.
|46 weeks 22 hours ago||This says it all....||
|48 weeks 6 days ago||Sources say this was right before practice...||
Braxton: "Coach.. I'm not feeling great, think I need to sit out."
Urbz: "Wait... I have an idea. I saw it in a movie.. errr a dream I had once."