Purdue Haikus
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:09 AM ^
Call the whambulence
For (checks notes) Ryan Walters
"We have to huddle." :(
Did Connor Stalions
Buy a ticket at Ross-Ade?
I bet it was cheap.
With or without signs
We will still beat on you like
The world's largest drum.
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:11 AM ^
Did not know coach name
Most relevant he has been
He should thank Stalions
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:16 AM ^
Ryan Waters sucks.
This is the time to take high road.
He chooses to walk through the sewer.
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:25 AM ^
score score score score score
score score score run up the score
here's your fucking sign
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:38 AM ^
Were we at your games?
it wasn’t to steal your signs
Huskers just beat you!
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:40 AM ^
Ryan Walters is
About to learn a lesson;
Poor Boilermakers.
Stay in the huddle
It will hurt less than fumbles
When Blue de-cleats you.
When asked about signs
Always remember one thing
Saturday's coming.
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:47 AM ^
Watch out behind you!
The ghost of sir Stalions lives
Ha ha, made you look
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:49 AM ^
Hold on, oh; Purdue?
I forgot about those guys
They still into trains?
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:49 AM ^
Walters guaranteed
Harbaugh will score Tee Dees in
Multiples of eight
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:55 AM ^
We have decoded
A sign from Boiler fandom
"Please, not in the face"
November 3rd, 2023 at 7:58 AM ^
We look down upon
Their begging helpless masses
And we whisper "no"
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:01 AM ^
Never a good plan
Mouthing off about B.S.
Run up the score Jim!
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:03 AM ^
Big Drum, swole Boiler
Football team, weak helpless fly
Pent anger, pull wings
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:05 AM ^
Tough talking Boilers
Calling out the Wolverines
This will end in tears
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:06 AM ^
They are all butthurt
all we do is win, win, win
all they do is cry
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:10 AM ^
And now a limerick:
Banging on a big drum
has always struck me as dumb
for at the end of the game
the song stays the same
the Boilers are under our thumb.
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:37 AM ^
…Corum will eat, and won’t leave a crumb
JJ will sit once the third quarter’s come.
Roman’s TDs will go viral, their train will sit idle,
Unless it’s driving up Ryan Walters’ bum
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:12 AM ^
There was a coach named (checks notes) Ryan Walters
Who cried, "Our signs we have to alter!" :(
They practiced to huddle
And they were befuddled
When their team still sputtered and faltered
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:22 AM ^
They thought it was smart
to goad he who remembers.
Purdue gonna die.
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:27 AM ^
(My first Haiku attempt, be nice....am I doing this right?)
Purdon't should stay home
A win is not in the Card
Stomp those shitmakers
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:47 AM ^
Puns and syllables
All very on point, good job
Yes, you did this right
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:34 AM ^
In the Big 10 West
They play very bad football
No Spoilermakers.
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:37 AM ^
Make them feel pain, hard
Let the world see our wrath, hard
Destroy painfully
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:38 AM ^
Hey Coach whoever
I have got your sign right here
Wolverines prevail
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:51 AM ^
When I was a child
i thought trains were the coolest
Helmet with P? LAME
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:53 AM ^
Whiny Big Ten coaches
Cry and piss and moan nonstop
Purdue loses again
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:57 AM ^
Release the fury
Of bottled-up aggression
Signgate, such a crime!
The rules and bylaws
Are obfuscated and vague.
Stealing signs is good,
Where permissible.
Recording signs is okay
When done correctly.
Don't punish Coach Jim
Or the players' great season
For a rogue actor.
Unleash the fury
Of gridiron dominance
Hail! Hail! Leave no doubt!
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:08 AM ^
That was an epic
Set of haikus, I'm impressed
Here is my +1
November 3rd, 2023 at 8:58 AM ^
hyenas and vultures
wait for the beasts to depart
at the massive derailment
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:05 AM ^
Extend Jim Harbaugh
He's A Jolly Good Fellow.
Demolish Purdue.
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:08 AM ^
Signs! Signs! Everywhere!
Blocking out the scenery,
We're breaking their minds!
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:13 AM ^
Run only Cover 1
No signs are necessary
Not rain, Purdue tears
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:16 AM ^
Don't poke the Harbaugh
Michigan will kill Purdue
Fuck E S P N
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:17 AM ^
Train leaves the station
Wolverines now throw the switch
Massive derailment
November 3rd, 2023 at 11:23 AM ^
They are no JR,
Nor are they SNCF.
Try: Amtrak on strike.
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:32 AM ^
In West Lafayette, where dreams fall flat,
There's a team that struggles, oh, imagine that!
The Boilermakers, in a not-so-golden hue,
Try to play football, but they're just passing through.
Upon the field, they stumble and fall,
Their efforts unnoticed, their plays, a crawl,
With helmets dented and hearts unsure,
They march to defeat, their fate obscure.
In Ross-Ade Stadium, where hopes decay,
They fumble and stumble, game after game day,
Their cheers sound feeble, their spirit's a joke,
Oh, Boilermakers, your luck's in a choke.
From sunrise gold to twilight's gloom,
Their chances of winning are lost in the tomb,
Oh, Boilermakers, how you amuse,
With every loss, you light the fuse.
In battles lost on fields so wide,
With hapless hearts and a faltering stride,
You sink our spirits, you make us groan,
Purdue's shame, in every bone.
So keep on, brave Boilermakers, go,
With your lackluster plays, let the defeats flow,
In every game, in every sorry plight,
You're the kings of failure, what a sight!
/credits to ChatGPT
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:50 AM ^
I think that's actually their fight song.
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:37 AM ^
Pile driver of blue,
Wolverines crushing Purdue,
Victory's sweet view.
November 3rd, 2023 at 9:55 AM ^
Been a crap two weeks
Reporters looking for clicks
Take it out on you
November 3rd, 2023 at 10:00 AM ^
There is a young man in West Lafayette
Who could have echoed Maurice Clarett
But instead he’s now cryin’
with his friend Ryan
and his team will get whupped I bet
November 3rd, 2023 at 11:19 AM ^
There once was a coach named Ryan,
No, not the one who's always cryin'.
(You know - the one that has to beg,
And the best part of him ran down Urban's leg)
But the one this Saturday that will be dyin'.
November 3rd, 2023 at 10:07 AM ^
You come at the king
You damn well better not miss
All done with mercy
November 3rd, 2023 at 10:18 AM ^
Pay for cheeseburgers
Steal opponents signs at will
Three peat Champions
November 3rd, 2023 at 10:43 AM ^
Boilher up! Boil her?
No, it's "boiler" not "boil her"
Hope that clears it up!
November 3rd, 2023 at 10:47 AM ^
Michigan - Purdue
External noise all around
Now just play the game
November 3rd, 2023 at 10:55 AM ^
I'm telling mommy
it is not fair, he hit me
I want my binky
November 3rd, 2023 at 11:00 AM ^
Amidst scrutiny
Michigan against the world
Dominance unleashed
November 3rd, 2023 at 11:13 AM ^
Bo-Whiskey Ryan,
Ryan Dyein' Beard (Third Base)
Ryan Pur-Doo-Doo.
Those are Bad Ryans
Walters: Dumb Young Swolly Bro
Fuck Ohio State.
November 3rd, 2023 at 11:27 AM ^
Boilermakers are
Better than Micheladas
But they both suck ass
November 3rd, 2023 at 11:35 AM ^
Purdue is so soft
Ryan Day is much softer
The jackhammer waits