I arrived home late last night so I was able to watch one of the best shows on television, The Colbert Report. He did a hilarious skit revolving around the new Tiger Woods commercial. I am unsure on how to embed so I'll post a link instead. I hope it makes you laugh half as much as I did. Enjoy.
OT Tiger Woods commercial
...is pwned by this Youtube clip that replaces Earl Woods' zombie voice with the "..please take your name off your phone..." voicemail.
I've heard the voicemail so much that it isn't really funny to me anymore. I've seen that and thought that Colbert's version was much funnier.
What about porking your neighbor's 21 year old daughter than you've known since she was 14?
Wait a minute, that's just creepy.
I hadn't heard about her. How can people cheer for him?
he's the greatest ever at his sport and he's making history. His personal life is a separate issue. If you want to use it as a reason not to root for him, that's fine, but you ought to at least see why others can divorce the two personas.
Woo for making history at hitting a small white ball... while being an immoral, controlling jerk.
What a hero.
The implication about the meaninglessness of sporting glory is fairly ironic considering the focus of this website. Obviously in the grand scheme of things Tiger's place in world history is not all that important. But the simple fact is sports (and sporting achievements) matter to a lot of people to some degree.
If you're trying to tie your sporting interests in with an athlete's real life personality, that's your business. It would be an awkward argument if you ever rooted for someone else who cheated on his wife, or sexually assaulted someone, or beat the crap out of someone for no reason, but I'm sure that's never been the case.
Was the funniest voice over. That was classic.
I haven't even seen the original commercial before now. What a scumbag. Using your dead father to revive your image? He is a disgrace to the human race.
That clip: Funny.
Beer up the nose: Not Funny.
The commercial is cheap, manipulative and sleazy but Colbert was hysterical. Ward Cleaver and Gene Wilder...priceless.
Really the commercial is just plain bizarre.
I actually just read that Earl Woods was refering to the relationship between him and his wife when the recording was made.
I used to root for Tiger, but it's hard to root for him anymore, no matter how talented he may be. It's hard to want to see Tiger pass a man like Jack in majors.
That said, Go Lefty!
If it was the law that nobody could cheer for any athlete who fucked around on his wife, NBA games would be silent.
I really don't give a shit what Tiger did in his personal life; it's none of my business. If I was, however, going to really dwell on it, I would wonder why a guy with an 11 at home was doing a bunch of 5's on the road.
Considering that golf probably has the classiest and best-looking groupies in the world with the exception of Formula One, his choice of companionship is somewhat baffling. If he really, really had to fool around, he surely could have found a lot better poontang that what he ultimately chose.
That being said, I am cheering for him this weekend and looking forward to seeing him play even better golf now. What really matters to me is how this relates to his performance on the course, and I think the entire episode has awakened a sleeping dog. AFAIC, it has probably awakened a big, ferocious dog with a gaping maw, an attitude, and 600 PSI in his masseters.
If I looked like Tiger and had a bazillion dollars like Tiger, I would NEVER chain myself to one woman until I was at least 50 years old.
What's the point of being a young, rich and good looking man if you can't enjoy the "fringe" benefits?
Neg away, moral majority...
Because being a celebrity 24/7 sucks. Because having people kiss your butt and ask you for favors all the time gets old. Eventually they come to envy normal people, who can have actual interpersonal relationships with people other than their bodyguards.
Anyway, if you wait until your 50s to get married, then you're changing diapers in your 50s and dealing with a rebellious teenager when you're a senior citizen, while your peers are enjoying being grandparents. There's always a tradeoff.
There is NO amount of money you could pay me to EVER have kids.
Marriage for companionship (non-sexual variety) when you are middle-aged and your raging libido has quieted somewhat is not a bad deal, but having kids is ALWAYS a huge pain in the a**.
Well, it's a good thing your own parents did not come to that same conclusion.
Nobody ever seems to take into account that in a day where information is almost instantly accessible (and where info like this is worth a ton of $$) that it's not possible some of these "heroes" of the past committed the same type of acts that Tiger did. They didn't have to worry about TMZ-type sites monitoring their every move. They also didn't have to worry about keeping said bad acts under total surveillance for fear one might speak out to make a shitload of money off of it. Even Michael Jordan was able to keep his affairs secret in a relative sense. But you don't hear anybody saying they don't respect him as a player anymore or that they regret cheering him on. He had women pent up in more than a few NBA cities.
The other thing I'll say is that I could never say either way whether or not I would have done what Tiger did. I'd like to say I wouldn't, but I would be lying if I was to sit here on a moral throne and claim there's no way I'd ever do something like that. Not when EVERY woman I come across is completely throwing themselves at me.
In other words, I don't hold his actions against him as far as me cheering him on this weekend or any other weekend, my primary reason being many of those who criticize him would do the same damn thing if they were in his position.
then he comes out with this horrible ad. What a shallow attempt at pandering but I guess I should have expected that from him (and Nike)
Is just kind of creepy to me.