OT: Mental health PSA
First, this isn’t commentary on the state of our threads or BPONE, et al. It is in the hopes of better mental health for all of us by helping each other out of the dark.
In an exchange with another poster last weekend, they responded with something that 1) I hope isn’t true and 2) isn’t something I would want anyone to feel. They mentioned having a note ready for when they “finally have the courage to pull that trigger.” I will never accept such a comment as humor or as ‘/s’. I hope you don’t either.
Suicides in the US are at their highest rate since WWII, and rates for men are about 3x that of women. Men are also less likely to talk to someone about their mental health issues yet among the best activities to combat it is talking to someone - a friend, a family member, or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. At the end of the day, we’re all human; we need interpersonal connections and a sense of belonging.
Chances are you or someone you know is battling something. I implore you, and for you to implore them, find someone to talk to. There’s much more going on in our lives than what’s on the surface – and we often don’t get past work and sportsball.
I value this community for its perspective, its sense of humor, and its connectedness. I wish you all to be well. And as my son reminded me today, if we teach each other to fish, we'll all be #eating.
Go Blue!
October 11th, 2019 at 12:49 PM ^
Nice PSA on a topic that hardly gets discussed.
October 11th, 2019 at 4:57 PM ^
Thank you.
And thank you for all the responses herein. This community never fails to amaze and impress. The sharing and support here is awesome to see.
October 11th, 2019 at 12:50 PM ^
Thanks for posting this.
October 11th, 2019 at 12:50 PM ^
On that note, talk to YOUR KIDS! I am a school guidance counselor and I cannot tell you how many students come to see me and feel like their parents "don't care about them". No kid should ever have to feel that way. Please, check in with your kids on a regular basis, ask about school, friends, feelings,etc. I know in this technological world it's hard to step away from things (I'm guilty as well), let's put our phones down and have meaningful conversations!
October 11th, 2019 at 4:53 PM ^
This. And to add to that, I would say that spending meaningful quality time with your children in activities that you both enjoy--whether it's sports, arts and crafts, outdoors stuff, hobbies, whatever--is critical. Even if it's something as simple as taking him/her with you when you go out to run errands and stopping for ice cream along the way, that time is critical in the emotional development of a child. My son is on the cusp of junior high so he's entering that stage when getting him to talk about how he feels is like pulling teeth, but I've noticed that he genuinely does appreciate the time we spend together doing random things like fixing stuff around the house, shooting hoops, running errands, etc.
October 11th, 2019 at 12:50 PM ^
Seconded. With a wife and a child diagnosed with bipolar disorder, suicide is something I’ve dealt with (family discussions about is as well as attempts) and is something that should always be taken seriously. The suicide rates are astronomically high among those with manic depression and bipolar.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:58 PM ^
Same. We have more in common than I thought.
October 11th, 2019 at 5:10 PM ^
More than just weed and cocaine anyways
October 11th, 2019 at 8:26 PM ^
Speaking of, Mrs. Hatter has been getting regular ketamine infusions and it has been a life saver. Suicidal depression is alleviated almost immediately.
October 11th, 2019 at 12:51 PM ^
Yeah, that's a pretty dark comment to make. I've never heard of somebody joking about suicide use that dark of a statement. If the person who made that statement is reading this thread, please get help, and remember that no dark period in your life lasts forever. Your life can change for the better in the blink of an eye, and the dark periods seem like a bad dream!
October 11th, 2019 at 12:52 PM ^
Where did Damone's thread go ?
October 11th, 2019 at 1:00 PM ^
I don't think anyone is missing it.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:13 PM ^
Except you, thread jacker!
October 11th, 2019 at 12:58 PM ^
Wow. Legitimately heartwarming to see this post and how upvoted it is. Good reminder that not everything has to be snark and sarcasm in life (which seems especially hard for men) and it’s ok to be genuine about serious issues. Seriously it’s ok to talk about stuff that 20 years ago might have been considered “chick stuff”.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:08 PM ^
Good comment about how not being snarky and sarcastic is hard for men. Men as a gender so often relate to one another with snark and sarcasm (usually with good intentions), but since men are often also less likely to show their emotions, it's hard to know when other men are struggling & to reel it in from a snark & sarcasm point of view. So I'd encourage us to put away the good-natured joking for a little bit, and see what happens. The most hurtful comment to me yet today is when somebody joked about depression with me while I was facing some really troubling thoughts & circumstances.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:00 PM ^
Best thing you can do for your mental health is not consume depressing information (mostly untrue) from the legacy media. It will do wonders for your mental health.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:12 PM ^
So instead people should get information from uplifting and reliable sources like InfoWars, 4Chan, 8Chan, etc.? Asking for a friend.
October 11th, 2019 at 4:39 PM ^
Trust me, when it inevitably turns out that "some" things those sources talked about and predicted end up coming true, lots of people are gonna struggle coming to terms with reality.
Stay tuned..
October 11th, 2019 at 2:11 PM ^
The composition of this post is biased and divisive, but I can honestly say that when I stopped consuming so much news (regardless of source) it had a great impact on my mental health. ALL of the major news agencies are currently built to divide, enrage, and scare us into caring about their stories.
Doesn’t matter where you consume your news—the messaging is designed to make you angry and frustrated and stressed because those feelings are proven to keep you coming back for more. I’d recommend trying to reduce your news intake and seeing how it impacts your mental health.
October 11th, 2019 at 3:02 PM ^
Definitely helpful to find a balance. Lots of very important things happening and I think it's good to stay informed, but disconnecting a bit makes a huge difference.
October 11th, 2019 at 5:55 PM ^
It's the 24 hour worldwide coverage that makes it depressing. While it's not good to hide one's head in the sand, it can be depressing to constantly hear of horrors that we can do nothing about.
October 11th, 2019 at 4:33 PM ^
People on this board aren't ready to accept this truth yet.
The mainstream media is dead.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:04 PM ^
I saw a Ted Talk about how rapidly mental health problems are rising in the US (and presumably the rest of the developed countries). It's grown from something like 5% to 50% in three or four generations. They've conducted studies on isolated groups that still exhibited "hunter gatherer" lifestyle and they've found that rates of clinical depression are around 1/2,000 in these groups.
There is a multitude of factors, but it boils down to the fact that humans evolved over millions of years (or were created by God, if you will) to need this sort of lifestyle. Over the last century and a half our society has moved away from this dramatically and human adaptation hadn't been able to catch up. Some big factors contributing to low serotonin levels:
-sedentary lifestyle
-poor balance of omega-6 vs omega-3 fatty acids (ratio should be around 1:1, but average Americans get around 17:1 omega-6/omega-3; these are two fats your body needs but can't produce naturally, so it's needed in your diet or with supplements)
-lack of interpersonal relationships and community
I say this as someone who is being treated for anxiety with Xanax and Lexapro, as well as therapy There are many things people can do to help their mental health in addition to medications. It's serious stuff, and it's highly taboo in our culture to even talk about it. I probably should have gotten treatment years ago but I put it off and it hurt me personally for a long time. There's no shame in seeking help.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:22 PM ^
This is very interesting info that makes total sense to me. Also, I can relate to your situation. I've been on lexapro for 13 years. While I believe it is beneficial, I found that counseling played a much greater role in my recovery. I have been symptom free for 10 years, and firmly believe the counseling is what did it for me! Good luck on your journey
October 11th, 2019 at 1:35 PM ^
serious answer: it is very cool that folks are talking about this and that they have the confidence to share. this can be a brutally tough topic. kudos to all, except that beverfever guy - bolivia for him.
not-quite-so-serious answer: EYB, i am offering you the chance to experience the ultimate natural serotonin high of hunting-gathering....its time to muck out the hen house and massage what we fondly call our 'manure mountain' a little. nothing like the high of a mountain of livestock scat to get a jump in your step!
October 11th, 2019 at 1:48 PM ^
Sounds like a perfect vacation! You could set up a little bed and breakfast and invest in the agritourism industry, a la Dwight Schrute and his 60 acre beet farm.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:55 PM ^
I've cleaned up after cows, horses, pigs, and chickens ... and chicken shit is the worst. Awful ammonia smell. Plus, chickens are nasty critters. :-)
October 11th, 2019 at 2:06 PM ^
i respectfully disagree. while i do agree that chicken scat can be pretty ripe, pig scat has a funk like no other substance in the world.
October 11th, 2019 at 2:58 PM ^
Yall should get a whiff of my baby daughters stank farts. That'll knock your boots off. She gets that from her momma.
October 11th, 2019 at 10:30 PM ^
sorry, father of many here. your precious daughter is JV in that category at best.
October 11th, 2019 at 3:20 PM ^
As someone who grew up within smelling range of both hog barns and chicken houses, I'm going to have to respectfully disagree.
Chicken shit is, by far, the worst smell you'll get from a farm.
What you're probably thinking of with pigs is the smell from the old barns that simply pumped the effluent into a lagoon and let it ferment in the open air. Because chicken houses have generally always contained droppings under the building, they didn't spread their smell as badly. But now that pig barns are increasingly legally obligated to not use an open pit, their smell is drastically reduced.
October 11th, 2019 at 5:04 PM ^
Not 'thinking of ', but looking at and walking/feeding/watering/haying/etc.
October 11th, 2019 at 2:49 PM ^
You have no idea (check that - you probably have every idea) how badly i would love to get out of this cubicle and go muck out some stalls. 20+ years of working outside and greed has stuck me at a desk. Not joking when i say my mental health has declined every day that I dont smell the air, foul or otherwise.
October 11th, 2019 at 3:14 PM ^
I spent 35 years in an IT career, where it was all screen time and thinking. Now I'm tending WV farm and working hard outdoors every day. It truly is a mental tonic ... after a hard day's work, I can see what I've accomplished. It's doing a world of good for me.
October 11th, 2019 at 4:42 PM ^
Check out owen Benjamin's stream on YouTube. He raves about homesteading and farming.
Good work on getting yourself back in a better place
October 11th, 2019 at 4:42 PM ^
I cut my own lawn because at least once a week I know when I started, I know when I finished, and I know if I did a goof job.
solid thread
October 11th, 2019 at 4:22 PM ^
You joke, but spending a week helping out on the family cattle ranch did wonders for my mental health in 2014.
I was *depressed*. Miserably. So I took vacation and headed out there. Recharged me for another full year.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:44 PM ^
This is a strong post. We have moved through industrialism to capitalism, and the nature of the human being has changed, but there is a fundamental nature to us. We belong in a flock, a pack, a group, and modern society, I believe, has created a fear of this simple communication and understanding. We come here because this is our pack, in good times and difficult times, but it’s us. Please remember if you need a human, there’s a human to sit with, talk football, basketball, and especially baseball with. This is all love, despite the petty conjecture.
October 11th, 2019 at 2:03 PM ^
“Go hunting with your kids so you don’t have to hunt for your kids”
October 11th, 2019 at 3:15 PM ^
^ Awesome. Def can’t wait to take my kids Bow hunting when they are of age.
October 11th, 2019 at 2:06 PM ^
Money and financial shame are a primary cause. We’ve been trained to believe success is a number and that if we can’t attain that we are worth less. This idea needs to be challenged and rejected. It is bullshit and extremely damaging.
Humans have a need to be productive. Our current iteration of capitalism has tied that to the number in your bank account. It’s good to see this idea starting to be challenged, but there is a long way to go.
October 12th, 2019 at 12:54 AM ^
A very good friend of mine who is gone once looked over at me with a fishing pole in his hand and he said “hey Doze life is a gift and be happy for what you have”
October 11th, 2019 at 1:24 PM ^
Excellent thread. Please talk to someone if you ever feel you are in that dark place.
A kid that I coached in Little League is being buried this weekend. He was the wonderful kind of young man you wouldn't mind your daughter dating. I had lost touch with him over the years.
He died in a car accident. Asking around a bit I think PTSD may have been involved after 3 tours in Iraq/Afghanistan. Nobody wants to talk much about it.
Whatever happened, I hope he is in a better place. Our community mourns his loss.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:29 PM ^
mi93: Good for you.
October 11th, 2019 at 4:48 PM ^
Thank you.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:31 PM ^
Depending on the source of info, 20 to 22 veterans a day commit suicide. No mention of suicide or anything even close to that should be taken lightly.
There's no such think as "crying wolf" on this subject.
The guys I served with and I make it a point to shoot each other a text or a phone call when we haven't heard from each other in a while.
stay connected, especially if you know or suspect someone is battling something.
Go Blue
October 11th, 2019 at 6:29 PM ^
Not all vets adjust well to civilian life. Most are too proud to admit it.
October 11th, 2019 at 1:32 PM ^
(hug)
October 11th, 2019 at 1:34 PM ^
Both me and my wife have suffered from mental health issues, my wife was the victim of a physically and mentally abusive relationship before she met me and obviously that is something that stays with you forever. My wife is currently on depression and anti-anxiety medication, and I honestly have had some really bad days lately but mine is not quite as severe as hers. I can honestly say doing something rash that we would regret is a place both of us have been to before. Great point about a lot of stuff being below the surface level as well, my wife was the first one I told about my depression, I did my best to hide it from everybody before that.