100-Percent OT: How to announce you're having twins
No, this is not me or anyone I know. It is just....simply.....awesome!
Someone has WAY too much time on his hands, but superb execution...
Cool video too.
Or your buddies will never believe it!
They are now 6....I still remember the day we found out. It was the morning of the ND game in 2003. I went with my wife to her OB/GYN appt. that morning near Piedmont Hospital here in Atlanta. It was supposed to be a quick check-up and then we were going to a BBQ at a buddy's house to watch the game. My wife was close to 6 months pregnant and we thought we were having a girl. As the Dr. was doing the ultra-sound, she was looking at the monitor and all of a sudden, she got this look on her face like she was peering at a ghost. She then says, "Guys - change of plans - there's not one baby in here, there are 2......and they are both boys." My wife started crying right there on the examination table. Needless to say, she was not up for going to the party that day. I, however, dropped her off and went to the nearest liquor store and purchased a nice big bottle of Woodford Reserve. I joined my buddies and at the BBQ and we proceeded to imbibe heavily and watch Chris Perry go ape-shit on the Irish in a 38-0 victory.
say, "Do abortions clinics ever have 2 for 1 specials?"
too much? probably too much
Too much, and this is further off topic, but last night I was talking to a girl at a bar, and she asked me what I did. I said "Doctor, but not a real doctor." "Then you are a Doctor of what?" "Oceanography." "You are an abortion doctor?" ... thinking on my feet ... "Yes, yes I am." I took it and ran with it all the way to "you should really come home with me, because if you get preganant, it's no problem." Too far? probably too far.
Did it work?
Didn't work. "I put my life on the line every day walking to the clinic, just so you have the right to choose" doesn't work on someone who has had an abortion, even if she is drunk and dumb. I should have known it wouldn't work, ever since that time I went to a Halloween party at Notre Dame in scrubs, carrying a coat hanger.
Pretending to be an abortion doctor is all fun and games until you meet someone who has had an abortion. Then it becomes a bloody mess.
Win: this joke
Fail: Laughing at said joke at work, and then having to explain why I'm cracking up to coworkers...
Try reading it on your phone in a conference call with your boss, laughing and having them stop what they are doing to address "what the hilariousness of patient immobilization techniques" are..
Post a topic on MGoBoard and email the link to everyone you know. Side effects include: loss of testicles.
Kinda adds whole new meaning to it.
I don't even want to have kids now, because any announcement would pale to this. Though I am kind of disappointed they're not going with Luke and Leia.
Wouldn't the sperm be the rockets and not the Millenium Falcon?
I mean, they're photon torpedoes, not rockets, but yeah, the millenium falcom should be the infertility doc or in vitro fertilization or something.
On a side note, my wife and I did in utero insemination and we ended up with twins. I wish I had this to forward to everyone at the time. Now we are having another girl in a few weeks and I am still trying to talk my wife into letting me name her Leia. Seriously.
My cousin got away with this! He named his first daughter Leia.
His wife had her revenge though: the guy now also has a son named "Avi."
Your wife got the in utero ... Of course, she may have helped you with your part of the process.
Whenever a woman says "I'm pregnant," you should know ...
Well played OuldSod, well played. I never get tired of that Ackbar clip.
Then she can't be pregnant!
... I spent too much time on 4chan about 6 years ago.
PICS OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN
edit: on second thought, please, no pictures
... real hard
Will the twins be Lando and Lando? I sure hope so.
cha-ching...cha-ching?
C'mon ... how could you give them any other names? You might never get sex again, but it would be worth it.
Then "Fielding" and "Fritz" should work just fine.
I say Tim and Biakabatuka
you say or how you say it, just be sure to say it twice.
It doesn't matter what you say or how you say it, just be sure to say it twice.