'Twas the Night Before Christmas - Redux

Mates,

Seems like it's time for an updated 'Night Before Christmas', so here goes:

'Twas the night before playoffs, when in the big house

not a wolverine was stirring, not even a mouse,

the equipment was packed in transports with care,

as the team flew to Glendale via Reindeer Air.

 

The players had mashed many blocking sleds

while visions of championships danced in their heads

And mamma in her kerchief and I in an 'M' cap

had just settled in for a long Christmas nap.

 

When out on the pasture there arose such a clatter      

I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter

Away to the window I flew like a flash

I wondered if a coyote needed to be kicked in the as#.

 

The moon on the breast of the blizzard-driven snow

Gave a lustre of midday to objects below,

When what to my wondering eyes did I see

Two team buses and Coach Jimmy!

 

With a whistle and play sheet, so lively and quick

I knew it was night practice, and no playoff trick.

More rapid than eagles his players they came,

And Jim whistled and shouted, and called them by name:

Now JJ, now Bell, now Roman and Schoon,

We're going to kick TCU to the moon!

To the top of the porch to the top of the wall

4 Verts! 4 Verts! Fly Patterns for all!

 

As defenses before the Michigan offense fly,

When our O-line crushes them, they all cry

So up to midfield and the end zone they flew

With a cart full of balls and Coach Jimmy too -

 

And then in a twinkling, I heard at the peak

The prancing and pawing of lots of cleats.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

Down the chimney Jimmy came down.

He was dressed in maize and blue, wearing khakis and boots

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

a bundle of trophies he had flung on his back

and he looked like an award host just opening his pack.

 

His eyes - how they twinkled, his chew, so merry,

A jaw full of spit, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And his sleigh was covered from the blizzard of snow;

He had a broad face but had lost his big belly,

so that when he laughed it no longer shook like jelly.

 

He was quirky, on the spectrum, a jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but worked quite steady,
He watched film and called plays and said "We're ready!"

 

"We might play ohio, coached by the guy on third base,

But we beat them already, and we'll murder their face.

We're headed to Arizona to crush us some Frogs,

Then we're going to LA to tame us some 'Dawgs!'.

 

Then He sprang to his bus, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight—

“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

 

Not everyone is with family and friends tonight, so this one is for those that are not.  May the rest of you also enjoy your evening, your Christmas, and your loved ones.  I am grateful for the time of year and for the fun and excitement of Michigan football and I hope you all are too. 

Blessings to you all, and Merry Christmas!

XM