Specials at Urban Meyer's restaraunt...
Ok folks,, let's see your creativity. If you didn't see it, Uncle Urbz is opening a restaraunt in Columbus, complete with a room dedicated to his record vs Michigan.
Your charge is to name some of the menu items...
My offering, a daily special...
Spotted Dick.
Urbz Two-timing Chili
2-timing, 3-timing, 4-timing, 5-timing.
Skyline's going to have some competition!
And a co-ed sandwich to go with that
That was offered at Larry Eustachy's Bar and Grill.
I wish I were an Urban Meyer Weiner
That is what I truly want to be
Cause if I were an Urban Meyer Weiner
Everyone would be in love
Oh everyone would be in love
Everyone would be in love with me!
URBAN MEYER (born 1964) WEINER
"FULL OF B A L O N E Y since 1964"
With apologies to Arlo Guthrie...
You can hide any crime you want,
at Urban's Restaurant.
You can tell any lies you got,
at Urban's... Restaurant!
Walk right in
(Don't mind Zach on his rack),
You'll never have to wait for a poop cooler out back!
You even get the B1G "home cooking" you want,
At Urbz Sad Pizza Restaurant.
Sing that before every O$U game. It would be seasonally appropriate
So in other words, you can name your price on his meals and if you use Michigan wins as a pricing model, you get to eat at Urbz for FREE!!!! Sound good to me.
Ball Lifter with cheese
Cream of Arachnoid Cyst Soup. Urban claims its his grandma's secret recipe. Supposedly it pairs well with the Police Blotter Burger, a favorite from his time in Florida.
Urban Lies Chicken Fries
Shelley Meyer looks the other way while Urban fucks Florida co-ed Meatloaf.
Lol at that apostrophe placement. Why is he fucking her meatloaf?
Fixed. I’m not an English major…
I think the real question is who'd want to fuck Meatloaf?
You wanna know right now! (before we go any further)
Hmmm. Let me sleep on it.
Nope. I gotta know right now.
I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that.
Or, his backup singer Hamburger Helper.
Only a guess, but that sounds more likely something that Zach Smith would do. At Urbz house and at The White House.
Off topic but Urban lives on the 7th hole at Muirfield. Really nice house. Or compound to be more precise.
No offense, but who cares
Why is he fucking her meatloaf? I guess you've never seen American Pie...
Tebown-in filet.
there were rumors. Just sayin.
The Fake Heart Attack Burger
The gator co ed special
The bottom of all of the menus will specify “All dishes are covered up like domestic violence”
Zach Smith Zucchini Fries
they’re only served ..... battered
im gonna get negged to Satans doorstep for that.
You win the day, sir. Well done.
He'll also be on staff to tenderize the day's meat.
The waitresses are all dressed like Florida cheerleaders.
Spending More Time with the Family/Retirement meal. You get iceberg lettuce topped with cottage cheese since you also retired because of...heart problem. The wife's meal is topped with a diamond necklace. And the kids get a free sidedish of lifetime trauma.
Zach Smith's Feloniously Sloppy Wiener
Neg salad sandwich.
Circle of Trust Onion Rings
JT was short ribs
He Was Short Ribs
The Sad Pizza
The I Can’t Remem-Burger
I really hope the restaurant has a special booth shaped like a golf cart for those that order the sad pizza.
That last one.... Killing me!!
The Aaron Hernandez I'd-kill-for-a-piece-of-that Cheesecake
A deep fired bacon triple cheeseburger with donuts for the bun. Call it the Florida Heart Attack burger.
I see you have been to Gourdough’s in Austin. Yummmmmm.
urban’s Ethical Soufflé: puffed up with air, but if you jiggle it with some truth, it collapses.
I m not sure they will be able to”recall” the daily specials.
Greasy Urb Gator Burger smothered in Fromunda Cheese
Urbz 'I mash our potatoes the way my assistants beat their wives' potato casserole.
Urbz 'epic double "post"' cereal.
Is he starting from scratch, or taking over an already successful restaurant?
Taking over a successful one and he agreed to continue paying under the table.