Crystal Ball Movement for Jarrett Patterson to Michigan

The Michigan Recruiting HQ members were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Jimmy H kicking Dantonio's ass danced in their heads;
And WolverineDevotee in his custom-made away jerseys, and Magnus in his lucky cap,
Had just settled down for a long off-season nap,

When out on President Schlissel's front lawn there arose such a clatter,
UMBig11 sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the GBW site,  Night_King flew like a flash,
Logged onto the Victors Board and fed Samm Webb some more cash

Meanwhile, the empty bleachers at the Big House were filled with new-fallen snow,
Gave the pondering Michigan fans wonders how our program had at one point sunk this low

When, what to wondering eyes should appear (!?),
But a man from Mission Viejo, California, and his lovely girlfriend holding a 6 pack of root beer,

With a little confirmation of Sam Webb's word of law, so lively and quick,
LSA2000 knew in a moment it must be Jarrett Patterson!
More rapid than Brian Cook's bloggings, his kick-ass assistants they came,
And Jim hand-shaked, and shouted, and called the greats by name;

"Now, Yost! now, Fritz! now Bo and Ufer!
On, Harmon! on Desmond! on, Woodson and Carter!

Forget Rojo's mother's take ! Lets start recruiting all over the Great Lakes!
This is Michigan! This is Michigan fergodsakesl!"

And for all... I say to you, go blue!