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OT: Iris Macadangdang, The Legend

By Caesar — April 7th, 2009 at 4:34 PM — 21 comments

Iris Macadangdang, gentleman. Iris. Macadangdang. I know two women named Iris from the University of Michigan. If I took a poll, I feel confident no one would care.

Iris Macadangdang is a saint. She is a political scientist who believes that politics really is science, so you know she has illogically unshakable conviction. Her hair reminds me of something awesome. It's black. Because I'm not racist, I'll say it reminds me of black people. I don't think she ever dyed her hair, so she's also natural. And that counts for something in MY pantry. Iris Macadangdang is also very nice. She added me on the facebook, spoke to me, and made up a fairly plausible reason for blocking me. Is there a chance she just left the facebook and didn't block me? Yes. More on miracles below.

Iris Macadangdang is more than a name. She is a thing like Band Aids and the University of Michigan. These are institutions so hallowed their brand name is the name. Got a cut? Get a Band Aid. Want a superlative education? Michigan. Hey buddy, could you suggest a fantastic woman? Iris Macadangdang.

I want you to say her name to yourself. Say it out loud. You will eventually yell it sweetly and mournfully. I know I just did. When I first heard her name, I couldn't stop hearing it wherever I went. I was ordering Iris Macadangdangs with cheese. I was revolving my Iris Macadangdang about the y-axis. I celebrated Iris Macadangdang on Mother's Day. I mowed the Iris Macadangdang, took out the Iris Macadangdang on garbage night, and LITERALLY Iris Macadangdanged while I watched a Michigan game.

Perhaps now I should disclose that I have never met Iris Macadangdang. I have never spoken to her in person. I seldom discuss her vastness without the cloak of anonymity. By God, I haven't even paid her the honor of stalking her. Gentleman, we all have regrets. Please do not judge me.

But I have shaken the hand of a man who possibly fornicated with Iris Macadangdang. He does not admit to what I must call "The Cataclysm." In fact, there is no evidence of this conquest whatsoever. But these denials come swiftly at the defense of his Jewish girlfriend, with whom I am convinced he is actually engaged but not telling anyone. Frankly, if there was ever a time to believe in miracles, it would be so with The Cataclysm.

I am the man who did not meet the man, but met the man who met the Macadangdang. I did not plant the Iris, but I met the gardener. Did I shake Sinatra's hand? No--but that still means something around here. So respect me.

And vote Macadangdang.

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Posted on: June 4th, 2009 at 8:20 PM #1
Mackadangdangtastic
Joined: 2009-06-04
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Dang!

My roommate and I are obsessed with the woman who is Iris Macadangdang. We even changed our dog's name to Macadangdang in her honor. We renamed Macadamia nuts "Macadangdang nuts". We probably say her name 50-60 times per day and have alienated our friends and family. We feel this is not healthy but the power of the Macadangdang has taken over.

Signed,

Macadangdanglers in Boise, Idaho

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Posted on: June 4th, 2009 at 9:36 PM #2
TIMMMAAY
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Dang.

Dang.

not just "douchey" MGoBlog user, but now TRUSTED MGoBlog user

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Posted on: April 8th, 2009 at 1:05 PM #3
Zone Read Left
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YESSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!

According to facebook I have one mutual friend with Iris Macadangdang.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 7:40 PM #4
MaizeinPhilly
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Jealousy

How can I also shake Tom's hand?

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 6:46 PM #5
bouje
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yeah man seriously

hilarious post

+10^10

"A house divided against itself cannot stand"

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:21 PM #6
Sommy
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Also, she probably just

Also, she probably just blocked you, because she's still on facebook and on my friends list. Not to bum you out or anything.

...and by that, I mean helter-skelter, willy-nilly and putt-putt!

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:41 PM #7
helloheisman.com
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edit

edit

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:15 PM #8
macula
Joined: 2009-04-07
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I'm not sure who this Caesar

I'm not sure who this Caesar guy is, but this is the second post of his and he reminds me of a lost creative writing major. Labeling "OT" is fine and good, but at a certain point doesn't this remind you of Talladega Nights and Will Ferrell and "all due respect, but..." In a way it's acceptable, but not really. Lions and Pistons and favorite Zingerman's sandwich all seem like somewhat acceptable OT threads, but "I have Iris Macadangdanged during a game" rubs me the wrong way, to carry the tune.

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:53 PM #9
TIMMMAAY
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Macula

You signed up to post that?

not just "douchey" MGoBlog user, but now TRUSTED MGoBlog user

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 6:04 PM #10
macula
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Sorry if it doesn't meet the

Sorry if it doesn't meet the standards around here. I've read the blog for a while and have been meaning to sign up. I also had a class with Iris once, so reading the name was kinda crazy and I thought I'd jump in.

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 6:40 PM #11
TIMMMAAY
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I figured you were really

I figured you were really Caesar.

not just "douchey" MGoBlog user, but now TRUSTED MGoBlog user

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:27 PM #12
Caesar
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Plea

I suck. I have no life. Her name was mentioned in an MGoBlog post. Please do not take this away from me.

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:16 PM #13
Sommy
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This is particularly bizarre

This diary is bizarre because I had a Spanish class with her several years ago before I graduated. I think it was Spanish 232 with Andy Noverr. We were usually paired up in class for dialog exercises. Small world. Either way, I saw the diary title and wondered if I had read it correctly.

But yeah, she's pretty cool. And she listens to Pat Metheny, which is pretty cool, too.

...and by that, I mean helter-skelter, willy-nilly and putt-putt!

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 7:13 PM #14
noshesnot
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What year?

I took 232 my freshman year with Andy. Cine and media or something like that.

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Posted on: April 8th, 2009 at 12:37 AM #15
Sommy
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I'm pretty sure it was Winter

I'm pretty sure it was Winter '06. And yeah, mine was Cine, too.

Andy was awesome. One of my favorite lecturers.

...and by that, I mean helter-skelter, willy-nilly and putt-putt!

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Posted on: April 8th, 2009 at 1:41 AM #16
noshesnot
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Ooo...Fall '03. Easily one

Ooo...Fall '03. Easily one of the best classes I took, nearly exclusively based on the fact that Andy was the lecturer. Also, he made us watch soft-core Spanish porn.

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Posted on: April 8th, 2009 at 12:39 PM #17
Sommy
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Aw man, I never got to see

Aw man, I never got to see any softcore porn.

Which movies did you guys watch? We had the Spanish Apartment (which I missed altogether), Men With Guns, La Lengua De Las Mariposas, Maria Full of Grace, and The Motorcycle Diaries.

...and by that, I mean helter-skelter, willy-nilly and putt-putt!

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Posted on: April 8th, 2009 at 1:15 PM #18
noshesnot
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Didn't get the Spanish

Didn't get the Spanish Apartment, but did get Y Tu Mama Tambien (softcore porn). I'm pretty sure we saw the others, save Maria Full of Grace. We saw TYMT in a small, private screening room in the MLB. I didn't even know they had those at that point, and never had any other reason to go to a private screening room again.

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Posted on: April 8th, 2009 at 2:29 PM #19
Sommy
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Oh, I'd never seen Y Tu Mama

Oh, I'd never seen Y Tu Mama Tambien, but I'd heard a lot about it. Never had heard it was basically a softcore porn, though. Haha.

...and by that, I mean helter-skelter, willy-nilly and putt-putt!

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:07 PM #20
Lordfoul
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I went from severely

I went from severely questioning this post to absolutely loving it by the end. Good work.

"If left isn't right, then right is all you have left. Right?" - Beagly Beagly to the Great Grape Ape /

www.seaandlearn.org

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Posted on: April 7th, 2009 at 5:11 PM #21
Caesar
Joined: 2009-03-25
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Ban Hammer

Dude, thanks for the props. I still fear the Ban Hammer.

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