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Date Title Body
11/12/2018 - 2:33pm Dude should never have been…

Dude should never have been a head coach.  About as career an offensive coordinator as you'll ever find.  

11/12/2018 - 2:32pm Rest in peace.  Huge impact…

Rest in peace.  Huge impact on many lives.  True maverick right up there next to Hugh Heffner.

11/08/2018 - 2:41pm Will miss Rutger game

Will miss Rutger game

Picking mom up at airport

God bless DVR

11/07/2018 - 2:51pm Wanting OSU with 1 loss is…

Wanting OSU with 1 loss is just [insert expletive demeaning intellect here].  All you weirdos wanting OSU to be as good as they can be are just odd, unusual aliens with the logic of a soap dish.  Please stop.  This is a team that has beaten us 15 of 17 times.  Yet you want them top flight for the game?  How about we freaking win 5 in a row against them before you mince about how competitive they are in boosting our resume...

Give me 0-12 OSU every day and twice on Sunday, forever.

May Sparty crush them this weekend, although Sparty won't.  Book it.  Mork will toss the game to spite Michigan.

11/07/2018 - 2:30pm If it's 16 of them shouldn't…

If it's 16 of them shouldn't that be sweet sixteen with the final 8 being the quarterfinalists, the final 4 being semifinalists and last 2 being finalists?  

11/05/2018 - 10:25am 1. You people wanting OSU to…

1. You people wanting OSU to win out  prior to the Game are weird.  It's like we're choosers rather than the beggars we really are.  How about we win a Big Ten championship or just win The Game a bit before you all start mincing about what kind of bow rests on top of it all?  Further, you would prefer risking an OSU game where OSU can take away all the good feels from this season and win the conference vs a game where even if they win we still play for and likely win the Big Ten championship, shutting up most Harbaugh haters?  Just weird, all of you.

2. You do realize the more OSU loses, the more recruits we take from them right?  That if OSU goes 0-13 we likely become much more likely to dominate recruiting and more likely see ourselves into a national championship right?  Or doesn't any of that register?  Can any of you guarantee that if Michigan had lost 15 of 17 to OSU back in the day that Ohio guys like Woodson and Howard choose to go Blue over the home team?  Think men, think.  Down with OSU and may they lose every game always.

3. Mortgage your house on OSU to cover this weekend on Sparty, who will likely throw the game because never forget that undermining Michigan is the beginning, middle and end to all Sparty existence.  I can't recall a single time Sparty helped us out in a situation like this in following Michigan now going on 40 years.  Don't expect it to start this weekend either.

11/04/2018 - 3:07pm  Is it really that hard to…

 Is it really that hard to understand? How many of those guys had already solidified a first round draft pick? Talk less gibberish please.

11/04/2018 - 3:05pm Best post in years.  Gary…

Best post in years.  Gary will forever be beloved by UM faithful.

11/04/2018 - 3:00pm Don’t forget.  Our downfall…

Don’t forget.  Our downfall defines MSU’s entire existence so they will likely throw the game against their good friends OSU.  It also better serves their recruiting interests for OSU to keep topping us.  Dantonio will throw the game.  Book it.

11/03/2018 - 7:20pm  After setting my clock back…

 After setting my clock back tonight I’m going to get up tomorrow morning at 6:18 AM, also known as 42 to 7, at which point I’ll enjoy a nice morning beverage  in honor of Don Brown and Jim Harbaugh. 

11/01/2018 - 6:08pm Keeping Brown would be as…

Keeping Brown would be as important as landing the #1 recruiting class x 5 if you ask me.  Extremely important to the program.  Must be retained.

11/01/2018 - 5:55pm Winning does not heal

When…

Winning does not heal

When protecting winning caused 

Unspeakable crimes

10/31/2018 - 8:27am I expected 9-3 with closer…

I expected 9-3 with closer to 8-4 than 10-2 due to past inability in away games of which we had 3 tough ones.  I was dubious on the O line and an offense that did not require defenses to play 11 v 11 by offering the QB run threat.

However I also sensed that Harbaugh went heavy introspective this off season especially with the parting ways with Drevno, and that good things would hopefully come from it.  They have in that the O line is improved (thanks Warriner) and Shea's read option.

I figured we'd go 1-2 in the key away games (ND, MSU, OSU) and 1-1 in the tough home games (UW and Ped State)

So far we're 1-1 in those key away games and 1-0 in the home games so still on course to meet the expectations if we lose to Ped State and OSU.  If we win either, then that would have exceeded my expectations.

That said, one of the bigger revelations of this year has been JH getting away from strict pro-style and introducing the read option.  This bodes very well for the future especialy with the wheels McCaffrey and Milton have shown.  Always felt like we were playing with one arm tied behind our backs against teams like Ohio State that added the QB run threat while our QB's stood like statues in the pocket.

10/29/2018 - 2:04pm More to hiring/firing than…

More to hiring/firing than record.  Exhibit A: JH/San Francisco.

10/28/2018 - 8:54pm Gotta take PSU to cover. …

Gotta take PSU to cover.  Bye week blahs coupled with down after huge MSU high will lead to what I expect to be a slow, slow start, and then there's a mobile, senior QB who is also accurate in McSorley.  This game could very well take script from our NW game but hopefully no more than to a lesser degree.

10/28/2018 - 8:51pm Our D is great but we've had…

Our D is great but we've had other epic defenses recently that didn't get it done down the stretch, not to mention half of MSU's offense was banged up or out, including a beat up QB.  Only reason I err on the side of caution is last year's PSU game exposed our D and Don Brown's schemes seem to open alleys for mobile QBs to escape and extend plays, so this is the perfect week for us to right that ship after which I'm fully on board that this is an epic D.  If Ped State drops 40+ on us thanks to McSorley's legs, we need to revisit a bit.  I have faith in Don Brown that he's had a year to stew and figure McSorley out.  GO BLUE.  Huge game this week.  Just huge.

10/28/2018 - 12:22pm Biggest concern for me is a…

Biggest concern for me is a slow start after bye week and come down from Sparty high.  That, and McSorley's legs.  Hope Don finds ways to keep McSorley from finding creases in the pocket.

10/28/2018 - 12:17pm Can we please spy McSorly? …

Can we please spy McSorley?  Tired of mobile QBs breaking pocket and extending plays on us for the last 15 years.

10/28/2018 - 12:16pm Doesn't flow quite as well…

Doesn't flow quite as well as:

Iowaiowaiowaiowaiowaiowaiowaiowaiowa

or

Ohiohiohiohiohiohiohiohiohiohiohiohio

10/25/2018 - 10:34am Great mom.  Lucky kid.

Great mom.  Lucky kid.

10/23/2018 - 8:06pm Beat Ped State

Beat Ped State

10/23/2018 - 12:02pm Yep.  Ped State is turning…

Yep.  Ped State is turning into the biggest trap game we've had in years.  Biggest because:

  • Ped State is still a very good team with a QB that gives us many problems extending drives,
  • So much is on the line now,
  • They pounded us and this defense to dust last year (albeit diff O C) 
  • Our team now has two weeks to love itself and bask in it's glory and get soft going in, and
  • Ohio State looks vulnerable so they are naturally looking ahead.

BEAT PED STATE AND THEIR DELUSIONAL, PEDOPHILE ENABLER LOVING FANBASE.

10/23/2018 - 11:34am Watching Urban's behavior…

Watching Urban's behavior over the years leads me to believe he suffers from anxiety disorder.  I could be wrong but I'll give it about a 75% likelihood and I would know since I also suffer this disorder.  Nothing is worse for this disorder than stress, with poor sleep and eating close seconds.  When you see him in videos gesticulating on the sidelines with a surrender cobra after a bad play, appearing to be spooked, or going into his own world and briefly ignoring people around him, those are telltale signs of someone grappling with this disorder.

There are medications, but end of day, his job is one of the more high stress jobs in the world, so there is only so much meds will do unless he wants to become a zombie.  I pondered if JH wasn't on anti-anxiety meds as well when he seemed to level off significantly on the sidelines last year.

The meds come in two forms - brain drugs and body drugs. 

Brain drugs like Lexapro and Effexor are meant for long term level off certain natural substances (serotonin and norepinephrine) in the brain but give you a spaced out zombie feeling at times and are thus undesirable, albeit sometimes necessary.

Body drugs like nadolol and propranalol just flat out shut down the release of adrenaline into your blood stream, and are a popular drug for anyone about to enter into a high stress situation like giving an Oscars speech or coaching The Game.  These drugs are quite incredible really, especially propranalol.  You can walk into the most high stress business meeting with a smile on your face, 100% relaxed, but with full cognition.  

But as with any drugs, we really do not know what the long term implications are so I personally try to avoid them as much as possible, but do keep a stash of propranalol around for that semi-annual high stress meeting or annual Michigan/OSU game.  Beer is a nice alternative sedative. 

Either way, we all tend to find our own personal hell and I'll imagine Urban's is starting to cause waves in Columbus just as it did in Florida, but end of day, the dude is still 77-9 and a top 2-3 college football coach, so I'll also guess his leash will be a long one.  

10/22/2018 - 5:41pm I love you as a fellow…

I love you as a fellow Michigan fan but can you and others please STFU until we get past a very good Ped State team?  Overlooking them is real dumb.  They remain an excellent team that destroyed us last year.  Moorehead and Barkley are gone, but the rest remains.  

BEAT PED STATE.

10/22/2018 - 5:40pm HAAAAA!!!  I laughed out…

HAAAAA!!!  I laughed out loud big on that one.  Well played sir.

10/22/2018 - 5:38pm Mark Dantonio will be MSU's…

Mark Dantonio will be MSU's coach as long as he wants.  He is 8-3 vs Michigan which is the only statistic that defines him and his university.  

Next year he will show up to Ann Arbor with a ton of frippery saved just for the game, and will mortgage away two or three games to prep for the only one that matters.

Dantonio has already "won" in that watching Michigan celebrate as much as we did in beating Little Brother is evidence of his impact on the rivalry.  20 years ago beating MSU was an afterthought.  Now it is a grand occasion, and that has been Dantonio's gift to MSU.

The problem is MSU now has Michigan's full attention going forward.  Good luck with that little brother.

10/22/2018 - 4:13pm I'm gonna go ahead and toss…

I'm gonna go ahead and toss the hilarious misspelling of "condescention" from that SpartanWire tweet right up there next to "Staee" and "Morans" into the Self Clown Lexicon.

10/22/2018 - 1:16pm I’m partial to rapture bald…

I’m partial to rapture bald guy behind JH in gif 2 as emblematic of this weekend.

10/19/2018 - 5:41pm Counter Strike or it didn't…

Counter Strike or it didn't happen.

10/14/2018 - 4:46pm Sorry but against a depleted…

Sorry but against a depleted Badger defense missing four starters I’m not sold on the O line.  Next week is the real barometer.

10/14/2018 - 1:00pm This game  reminded me of…

This game  reminded me of the Penn State game two years ago when we crushed a depleted team that  was missing half of it’s starting defense.  Not getting too excited just yet. 

10/09/2018 - 1:55pm Any defensive stats need to…

Any defensive stats need to be taken with the grain of salt that the best teams put in second and third string in the 3rd Q when they are already up 42-0.  I'd toss OSU in that mix.  Their D is better than the stats show.

10/03/2018 - 12:31am 8-4. we beat either MSU or…

8-4. we beat either MSU or UW and lose to PSU and OSU.

10/01/2018 - 5:58pm Fully in the BPONE now.  I…

Fully in the BPONE now.  I see losses to PSU and OSU and a split between UW and MSU.  8-4.

09/27/2018 - 2:09pm Post game reporter to Meyer:…

Post game reporter to Meyer: "With all of the off-field problems you've been experiencing does this win help?"

Meyer: "Yeah it's been rough being exposed for the callous, self important douche I am, but winning football is everything.  Around these parts I could go stab my mother in the chest and as long as I keep bringing the wins to these mouth breathers all else is white noise.  I mean let's face it, this win has fully vindicated me and this university of all past transgressions.  Winning makes everything right.  On to next week and winning more football games."

 

09/24/2018 - 3:53pm You have this 100% backwards…

You have this 100% backwards man.  Ohio State is the game we desperately want to win this year, and every year.  Unfortunately, Dwayne Haskins is Ohio State's best quarterback of all time (yep sticking to that) and they look like a juggernaut.  If anything, the sign of weakness we want to see is from Ohio State.  While I personally despise Ped State's program far more than Ohio's, all anyone will talk about in the off season is how JH did against MSU and OSU.  A Ped State win would just be icing on the cake. 

Further, there has never been more desperation for us to beat OSU than this year.  JH is the best coach available for our program and this win would solidify him several more years as opposed to potentially exposing him to rival troll fatigue that just may push him to resigning after next year if we don't win that one.

Must.... beat... OSU...  Just don't see it in the cards though given how insanely good Haskins looks.

OSU 40 Ped State 27

09/24/2018 - 1:33pm Devin Bush in twice on the…

Devin Bush in twice on the Kfatow standings because he really is that good.

09/23/2018 - 7:04pm I remember what happened…

I remember what happened after we throttled Ped State two years ago kind of like we just throttled Nebraska.  Except back then we didn’t have such an insane schedule capped by an OSU team led by their best QB of all time (yep I said it).  9-3 if lucky.  8-4 very possible.

09/23/2018 - 6:50pm Someone explain to me what…

Someone explain to me what vanishingly unlikely means.

09/23/2018 - 11:02am Livers gained 135 pounds all…

Livers gained 135 pounds all in the gut and is hiding it behind Matthews.  If I’m him I’d just own it and sprawl mascot like across the floor front and center.

09/20/2018 - 3:45pm Yep.  Barrett was actually…

Yep.  Barrett was actually quite terrible.  Haskins has sadly taken that program to another two levels...  

09/17/2018 - 11:06am You'd think a guy who…

You'd think a guy who managed guys like Aaron Hernandez would have had all the life experience needed improve at managing people...  Translation would be something like this:

"I'm terrible at paying attention to obvious red flags in others and managing people because all I care about is me and the on-field success of my football team.  Since I got busted on this one, and since we're 3-0 and looking like an NC caliber team, let me layer another false apology out there with the sole purpose to cover my own ass best I can until we win that NC and everyone forgives me anyway.  I'll be standing on that podium holding the NC trophy and Jim Nance will ask if the NC is extra special given the tough year I've had and I'll say yes because winning at football will have whitewashed my sins and justified all of the blind support of the program and fans that care far more about winning at football than domestic violence.

Oh, and the name Courtney Smith will never again come out of my mouth or my tweets.  She is now in the rearview.  

My goal in life is to out-Tressel Jim Tressel by winning so much football that I can even go out and stab someone and the next year I'll be brought back to Ohio Stadium for a standing ovation by my adoring, cooler pooping fans who define a man not by his character but by winning at football to make them feel better about their otherwise empty lives." 

09/16/2018 - 12:21pm  I am not sure what part of…

 I am not sure what part of Dwayne Haskins being magnitudes better than JTBarrett  you are not getting.  This OSU team is significantly better than last years team..  

09/16/2018 - 12:15pm Michigan has been down in…

Michigan has been down in the series for 15 years and OSU fans like you should be focusing on Alabama and Clemson yet here you are, obsessed with Michigan.  That is obvious.  Your obsession is embarrassing to you and actually quite flattering to us that you care so much.  Please keep devoting more energy to putting Michigan down.

09/16/2018 - 11:55am Could not disagree more. …

Could not disagree more.  Haskins right now looks like the best QB they have had since Troy Smith.  He will always be an RPO threat in that offense.  Absent injuries I just do not see how we win this game.

09/10/2018 - 1:22pm The worst part is this…

The worst part is this ginormous oak tree on my front lawn that has been begging to be cut down for years as it has aged, now with soft roots and base after a week of torrential downpours.  I'm giving ole TreeBeard out there a 35% chance to level my house if this hurricane does what it is likely to do.

09/10/2018 - 10:41am My hot take is that…

My hot take is that unfortunately, I still have yet to see anything to convince me that:
1. Don Brown's at time over aggressive defense can't be exploited by better offenses, and especially ones who spend all year preparing for him like MSU

2. JH's offense doesn't crumble like a card castle against better defenses due to it's predictable nature and over-reliance on pro elements.

These games against WMU and SMU really don't mean anything other than vacuous Ws.  

Need results against the big boys.  Many, many chances this year to get those results.

PSU looks very dangerous, especially with how effectively their offense checks into better plays against the presented D formation, as does UW because obvious so I honestly think our best chance is at Sparty.

09/04/2018 - 1:05pm ND did what every team is…

ND did what every team is going to do, which is attack our weakness by blitzing like crazy, under the assumption that our line is so turnstile that they will get to the QB fast enough to overcome any compromise the blitz creates in terms of a depleted second level.  I expect to see this relentlessly all year.  

We will win a number of games due to the talent level at all other positions, but against the big boys who will drop 30-40 on Don Brown's D, especially now with a few years of familiarity with it - I don't see our offense keeping up.  Hope I'm wrong.

09/03/2018 - 1:22pm  This is all well and good,…

 This is all well and good, but where are the RPS wins for this offense? Every other elite offense nowadays catches defenses in wrong formations or finds huge gaps or crossing routes to throw downfield into and you see none of that from our offense. Our only big play was a heave requiring acrobatic catch.   It just seems that while other offenses are playing chess, Harbaugh is playing checkers and just hoping that his checkers pieces are bigger and faster and more talented.  You see tentative quarterback after tentative quarterback hesitating due to unimaginative route designs, causing sack after sack.  

My only remaining hope for this season is that Harbaugh sandbagged, in order to save the fireworks for our real key games that loom ahead. Not holding my breath.

09/03/2018 - 3:40am Your title instantly told me…

Your title instantly told me you're either less than 35 years old or just started following Michigan football a couple of years ago.  I'd almost bet my life on either one or the other.