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Date Title Body
09/24/2018 - 3:53pm You have this 100% backwards…

You have this 100% backwards man.  Ohio State is the game we desperately want to win this year, and every year.  Unfortunately, Dwayne Haskins is Ohio State's best quarterback of all time (yep sticking to that) and they look like a juggernaut.  If anything, the sign of weakness we want to see is from Ohio State.  While I personally despise Ped State's program far more than Ohio's, all anyone will talk about in the off season is how JH did against MSU and OSU.  A Ped State win would just be icing on the cake. 

Further, there has never been more desperation for us to beat OSU than this year.  JH is the best coach available for our program and this win would solidify him several more years as opposed to potentially exposing him to rival troll fatigue that just may push him to resigning after next year if we don't win that one.

Must.... beat... OSU...  Just don't see it in the cards though given how insanely good Haskins looks.

OSU 40 Ped State 27

09/24/2018 - 1:33pm Devin Bush in twice on the…

Devin Bush in twice on the Kfatow standings because he really is that good.

09/23/2018 - 7:04pm I remember what happened…

I remember what happened after we throttled Ped State two years ago kind of like we just throttled Nebraska.  Except back then we didn’t have such an insane schedule capped by an OSU team led by their best QB of all time (yep I said it).  9-3 if lucky.  8-4 very possible.

09/23/2018 - 6:50pm Someone explain to me what…

Someone explain to me what vanishingly unlikely means.

09/23/2018 - 11:02am Livers gained 135 pounds all…

Livers gained 135 pounds all in the gut and is hiding it behind Matthews.  If I’m him I’d just own it and sprawl mascot like across the floor front and center.

09/20/2018 - 3:45pm Yep.  Barrett was actually…

Yep.  Barrett was actually quite terrible.  Haskins has sadly taken that program to another two levels...  

09/17/2018 - 11:06am You'd think a guy who…

You'd think a guy who managed guys like Aaron Hernandez would have had all the life experience needed improve at managing people...  Translation would be something like this:

"I'm terrible at paying attention to obvious red flags in others and managing people because all I care about is me and the on-field success of my football team.  Since I got busted on this one, and since we're 3-0 and looking like an NC caliber team, let me layer another false apology out there with the sole purpose to cover my own ass best I can until we win that NC and everyone forgives me anyway.  I'll be standing on that podium holding the NC trophy and Jim Nance will ask if the NC is extra special given the tough year I've had and I'll say yes because winning at football will have whitewashed my sins and justified all of the blind support of the program and fans that care far more about winning at football than domestic violence.

Oh, and the name Courtney Smith will never again come out of my mouth or my tweets.  She is now in the rearview.  

My goal in life is to out-Tressel Jim Tressel by winning so much football that I can even go out and stab someone and the next year I'll be brought back to Ohio Stadium for a standing ovation by my adoring, cooler pooping fans who define a man not by his character but by winning at football to make them feel better about their otherwise empty lives." 

09/16/2018 - 12:21pm  I am not sure what part of…

 I am not sure what part of Dwayne Haskins being magnitudes better than JTBarrett  you are not getting.  This OSU team is significantly better than last years team..  

09/16/2018 - 12:15pm Michigan has been down in…

Michigan has been down in the series for 15 years and OSU fans like you should be focusing on Alabama and Clemson yet here you are, obsessed with Michigan.  That is obvious.  Your obsession is embarrassing to you and actually quite flattering to us that you care so much.  Please keep devoting more energy to putting Michigan down.

09/16/2018 - 11:55am Could not disagree more. …

Could not disagree more.  Haskins right now looks like the best QB they have had since Troy Smith.  He will always be an RPO threat in that offense.  Absent injuries I just do not see how we win this game.

09/10/2018 - 1:22pm The worst part is this…

The worst part is this ginormous oak tree on my front lawn that has been begging to be cut down for years as it has aged, now with soft roots and base after a week of torrential downpours.  I'm giving ole TreeBeard out there a 35% chance to level my house if this hurricane does what it is likely to do.

09/10/2018 - 10:41am My hot take is that…

My hot take is that unfortunately, I still have yet to see anything to convince me that:
1. Don Brown's at time over aggressive defense can't be exploited by better offenses, and especially ones who spend all year preparing for him like MSU

2. JH's offense doesn't crumble like a card castle against better defenses due to it's predictable nature and over-reliance on pro elements.

These games against WMU and SMU really don't mean anything other than vacuous Ws.  

Need results against the big boys.  Many, many chances this year to get those results.

PSU looks very dangerous, especially with how effectively their offense checks into better plays against the presented D formation, as does UW because obvious so I honestly think our best chance is at Sparty.

09/04/2018 - 1:05pm ND did what every team is…

ND did what every team is going to do, which is attack our weakness by blitzing like crazy, under the assumption that our line is so turnstile that they will get to the QB fast enough to overcome any compromise the blitz creates in terms of a depleted second level.  I expect to see this relentlessly all year.  

We will win a number of games due to the talent level at all other positions, but against the big boys who will drop 30-40 on Don Brown's D, especially now with a few years of familiarity with it - I don't see our offense keeping up.  Hope I'm wrong.

09/03/2018 - 1:22pm  This is all well and good,…

 This is all well and good, but where are the RPS wins for this offense? Every other elite offense nowadays catches defenses in wrong formations or finds huge gaps or crossing routes to throw downfield into and you see none of that from our offense. Our only big play was a heave requiring acrobatic catch.   It just seems that while other offenses are playing chess, Harbaugh is playing checkers and just hoping that his checkers pieces are bigger and faster and more talented.  You see tentative quarterback after tentative quarterback hesitating due to unimaginative route designs, causing sack after sack.  

My only remaining hope for this season is that Harbaugh sandbagged, in order to save the fireworks for our real key games that loom ahead. Not holding my breath.

09/03/2018 - 3:40am Your title instantly told me…

Your title instantly told me you're either less than 35 years old or just started following Michigan football a couple of years ago.  I'd almost bet my life on either one or the other.

09/03/2018 - 3:38am Very true.  Nothing more…

Very true.  Nothing more excruciating than watching this D crush on 1st and 2nd and suddenly turn into jello on third down over and over and over....  Frustration level 10.  

Also, ND stepped off the gas in a big way after half time  Were this game remotely competitive our D doesn't show as it did in the second half when ND milked clock two downs every series.

09/03/2018 - 3:32am Gotta disagree.  Tired of…

Gotta disagree.  Tired of people putting the blame on our players.  If anything, John O'Korn deserves an apology because at several times, our #1 QB recruit in the country a couple years ago appeared very O'Kornish. 

The bottom line is Pep (and Harbaugh) expects pro level play out of college level quarterbacks.  His system requires pro progressions and reads that other programs just do not have.  If you watch Ohio State's well oiled machine, the job of the QB is almost always simple - one or two reads and go, period.  This is how you can plug in your third string college kid and win an NC.  Further, our QBs rarely try to fit tight windows.  Take that Wimbush TD heave in the end zone.  Our QBs, for years now, have rarely tried such throws, instead tentatively holding the ball and getting sacked.

In the second half especially, the offensive line gave our QBs plenty of time, and our QBs did a fine job of getting the ball out to their check downs, but how many downfield passes were thrown?  2 or 3 the whole game?  

After this game, where Michigan had the #1 ranked QB from 2 years ago on offense, and the #1 ranked player on D from 2 years ago on defense, and came up with 10 points, I got off the bandwagon.  Harbaugh's and Pep's offense is a dinosaur that has been substantially surpassed by systems deployed by other elite programs.  9 months to renovate after last year's disaster and literally no change at all.  

The offense may tune up and dominate it's way to 9 wins this season but I saw enough yesterday to be thoroughly convinced this offensive system will not get us to a Big Ten championship or playoff victory.

I'd love nothing more than to be 100% wrong, but better reality than pie in the sky bullshit.

08/27/2018 - 8:49am You know it’ll be an…

You know it’ll be an unwelcome read when Brian starts it with “Michigan state”...

08/25/2018 - 10:19pm Ugh, I got a text today from…

delete

08/25/2018 - 4:53pm Order of pussy schedules:

Order of pussy schedules:

MSU has 4.25 tough games - NW, PSU, UM, OSU, Neb(.25) - Joke.  At least they have @PSU the week before us so bet your mortgage on PSU to cover since Little Brother will spend the PSU week preparing for us the following week as usual.

OSU 4.25 - TCU, PSU, Neb(.25), MSU and UM.  They never seem to have a touch schedule.

UW 4.25 - Iowa, Neb(.25), UM, NW, PSU

PSU 5 - OSU, MSU, Iowa, UM, UW

Michigan 6.25 - ND, Neb(.25), NW, UW, MSU, PSU, OSU

08/25/2018 - 2:42pm The X factor Is always…

The X factor Is always injuries, and when you have a patsy schedule like Wisconsin and Ohio State, you rest your best players a lot more, and that snowballs into better likely performance at the end of the season.   The converse is true for us, given our brutal schedule.  If we miraculously stay healthy somehow, we are totally in it and I can see where Desmond is coming from .

08/21/2018 - 3:43pm Wisconsin will still find a…

Wisconsin will still find a way to stay below that glass ceiling under which they and other "good plus" programs like Iowa and Michigan State have dwelled for decades.  They'll have a gaudy record and get destroyed in either the BIG championship game or the first playoff game.  About as given as gravity.

08/20/2018 - 5:44pm Suspending Meyer a few games…

Suspending Meyer a few games before the Big Ten season is about as punitive on him as suspending a pitcher for the next three games that he wasn't even slated to pitch in - it's nothing at all.  A suspension that would really curb behavior would include games against key rivals so his career stats could actually potentially take a hit, but they won't let that happen.  Winning and football are too important.  Man, our conference division, between Ped State, Nassar State, THE Wife Abuse State University and freaking Maryland -  home of death by bully - really is a shit show.  The world should really be behind the good guys (and it isn't going to be Indiana or Rutgers) to step up and kick some ass this year.  Go Blue.

08/19/2018 - 4:26pm Not to veer, but is it me or…

Not to veer, but is it me or is OSU magically blessed or something that every time poop is about to fly their way, an NC coach or a bigger scandal is there to save them from it?  Either way, love it if Maryland does this as it should set a contrast upon which OSU's obvious retainer of Meyer will look for what it is - another school that cares more about winning than anything else.

08/09/2018 - 3:04pm No sir.
#3 Take that $15-$30…

No sir.
#3 Take that $15-$30,000 you save buying a new car, buy Amazon stock to sit on for 5 years then retire.

#4 Playing golf with generic clubs is like playing basketball in flip flops or tennis with a squash racket - you are simulating the experience, but cheating yourself of enjoying the game how it is supposed to be enjoyed.

$6 In laws get an asterisk.  With them the approach is  

1. Limit contact as much as possible, ideally to .01% of your existence or less. 
2. When you do have to spend time with them, remember that that misery only affects .01% of your life if you're doing it right, which isn't so bad. 
3. If they live nearby thus forcing you to spend more than the requisite .01% of your life with them, secretly apply for jobs far enough away to move their existence into that .01% bracket.  Get creative in explaining to your wife why it's important to move.  

08/09/2018 - 2:48pm False dude false.  Flowers…

False dude false.  Flowers can get you the short term jump but in the long run they are a signal that you are in the palm of her hands which she will quickly or eventually find boring. 
 

Player Rule #1: The more a woman tries to figure you out, the more she will want you.  The inverse is equally true.

As a concession I'll allow you to send flowers at most once every 5 years.  Truce?

08/09/2018 - 2:08pm You're talking about OSU -…

You're talking about OSU - Home of "I hope he doesn't fire me" AD's and Gene Smith who wrote the playbook on "deny, deny, deny."  

This is what is going to happen - Meyer will be penalized severely like missing 4 games, but will be allowed back just in time for the meat of the schedule because of course.  OSU will state he is on probation, on a short leash, etc., etc., all of which will be bullshit.  OSU will talk about revising all kinds of process and guidelines to avoid situations like this again, all of which will just be noise to appease the torch and pitchfork crowds until the next controversial shiny object du jour draws away the media attention.

Book it.

08/09/2018 - 2:04pm I'm confused.  Why is it…

I'm confused.  Why is it that I detest when posters come here and lament rival player injuries with the old "I want them at full strength when we play them for no excuses" mumbo jumbo, yet when it comes to Meyer, I DO want that jerk off to stay because I'm thoroughly convinced JH is about to turn the tables on the rivalry and I want it to be Meyer he does that to?  I'm weird and do not understand myself.  

08/08/2018 - 6:30pm 1. Don't assume you'll hear…

1. Don't assume you'll hear the wife coming into the room when you jerk off.  Always lock the door or at minimum set up a visual obstruction to buy you time.

2. Never buy first edition anything.  Let them iron out the bugs and buy version 2.0.

3. Don't buy a car new unless you like pissing thousands of dollars away.

4. Always get custom fitted golf clubs.  You might have the perfect swing but if your clubs are wrong for you'll still slice it in the woods like Judge Smayles.

5. Never send a date flowers, ever.  Dating you is like playing with a G.I. Joe - there's only so much before the mystery and fun dissipate, and sending her flowers hastens that pace to boredom and dumping you by 300%.

6. With family, ignore the negatives best you can and focus on the positives, unless your loved one is killing, raping or stealing, in which case smack them upside the head as often as possible.

7. Fuck Penn State and their pedophile enabler apologist fans.

8.  At work, dress well, be neat, timely and polite - if you can't show others that you are responsible with your own brand, they sure as shit won't deem  you responsible for senior roles.

9. Marriage hack - If she respects herself, she's Mrs. Right - you have my blessing to marry her.  If she doesn't respect herself (drunk, drugs, slob, etc., etc.) she's Mrs Right Now - have a good time, then move on.

10. Be a Michigan fan and wish the ruin of fan bases supporting coaches who enable and apologize for pedophiles, pedophile enablers and wife beaters.

11. Consider that your political convictions just might be wrong.

 

08/08/2018 - 12:51pm Pretty obvious.  And totally…

Pretty obvious.  And totally fine with me.  JH is getting us ready to supplant Meyer now that he has had a few years to figure things out and I want Meyer across the sideline when this is proven.

08/07/2018 - 7:20pm Why would you ever like…

Why would you ever like seeing Wisconsin get love?  Eff the Cheeseheads and their inflated success in that soft division.

08/05/2018 - 3:17pm Why anyone gives two cares…

Why anyone gives two cares about preseason polls I’ll never know.

07/31/2018 - 4:13pm ND brings back 10 starters…

ND brings back 10 starters on D including some solid beasts in the trenches so if you couple that with a new Michigan QB playing at ND for the first time and the damn South Bend juju, I could easily see us outplay, but lose to ND due to turn overs.  Still confident we can take them.  I give us a 61% chance to win.

07/24/2018 - 1:05pm Agree that much hangs on…

Agree that much hangs on this season, not so much that we need to win all our games, but because we get to see Jim's first product after his off-season course correction.  JH is an incredible coach with no close second in terms of who is best for Michigan, but he made critical preparatory miscalculations the first three years on offense which were understandable given his last college QB was Andrew Luck and he just returned from the NFL.  

In sum, I'm of firm belief that Jim projected a level of competency on college kids that didn't exist, but was required to run his complex, "card castle" pro offense, which ultimately led to it all coming apart last year.  He was humbled and has learned from the experience and has now hopefully course corrected with the off season changes.  We get to see what that course correction looks like this year and if we struggle with the firepower we have, I agree that bodes very poorly for the future.

07/24/2018 - 10:01am Kudos to Harbaugh.  Douches…

Kudos to Harbaugh.  Douches from 11 Warriors and SpartanPride or some such, both trolled him with questions rubbing in that he's 0-3 and 1-5 against MSU and OSU into their questions and JH handled their nonsense with aplomb, gently brushing their questions aside and showing not the slightest effect they were hoping.   

07/19/2018 - 12:36pm No.  Totally unimpressed…

No.  Totally unimpressed with his play once he was in.  More a deer in headlights than not.  There was a reason he was third in the pecking order.  Good young man, but definitely not the answer for us at QB.  Throws a nice ball but doesn't show the grit/fire or the sharp decision making required to succeed at the level we require to compete against the OSU's of the world.

07/18/2018 - 5:03pm 1. UM - Especially with the…

1. UM - Especially with the long, fancy intro

2. Wisconsin - Catchy.  The three consecutive notes after On Wisconsin are quite delightful shower fodder.

3. ND - Michigan's real lil bro.  Just behind at everything from academia, to basketball, to football.  I guess they have that Heisman thing.

4. FSU - War chant.  Perfect in it's lyricless simplicity for a consistently over-served and dimwitted fan base.

07/13/2018 - 1:59pm I also attended that year. …

I also attended that year.  Was cool seeing Doyle Brunson blowing around on his scooter.

07/13/2018 - 1:58pm Fair, but most of the hands…

Fair, but most of the hands Hellmuth calls "poor play" are not in fact that.  He just uses that as a crutch to vent like a baby.

07/12/2018 - 4:41pm Hellmuth did win the main…

Hellmuth did win the main event in the 80's unseating Chan who was going for a 3 peat.  Hellmuth is an excellent tournament player who has won the most WSOP tournaments (i.e., bracelets).  However he is also an insufferable douche who commonly insults table mates who take a pot off him for "playing poorly" next to his greatness.  Most people you'd think would be pleased that the competition plays poorly, but to Hellmuth, anyone who plays a hand in a way that does not end up with him winning is playing poorly and thus bad at poker.  Universally despised fellow.

07/12/2018 - 1:10pm Although judging from Manion…

Although judging from Manion's hat, it looks like he's a Domer in which case boo this man!

07/12/2018 - 1:09pm Yeah.  Nice article on it…

Yeah.  Nice article on it all here:

https://www.detroitnews.com/story/sports/2018/07/12/cha-ching-nic-manion-joe-cada-make-wsop-poker-main-event-final-table/777994002/

07/12/2018 - 1:07pm Not sure if Joe attended UM…

Not sure if Joe attended UM of not but his primary backer in '09 Cliff Josephy did, and Joe is from Clinton Township.  He and his mates are all avid Michigan fans as evidenced by how prominently they represent the university.

07/12/2018 - 11:46am Yes.  Please do not disturb…

Yes.  Please do not disturb the snowflake sanctity of my blog safe space.  It really hurts my important feelings.

07/12/2018 - 11:21am My wife works with the…

My wife works with the traumatic brain injury team at the NIH commissioned by both the NFL and our military so 100% agree, however the biggest clean hit in football history also doesn’t necessarily deserve to be buried.

07/11/2018 - 5:06pm Hate to say the Daydrion…

Hate to say the Daydrion Taylor hit needs to be in here.  The hardest hit in the history of football with no close second.

06/30/2018 - 5:43pm So at what point does…

So at what point does Florida become the enemy?

06/27/2018 - 2:55pm Gotta toss some green at…

Gotta toss some green at Yaklich and lock him down.  With this D and some better 3 pt shooting a Natty is a very real possibility, unless another 6th man white guy decides to make the NC game against Michigan his 3 pt break out bomb party as has been the case now twice in a row.

06/25/2018 - 3:20pm Jim is #1-2 in terms of…

Jim is #1-2 in terms of coaching talent and recruiting prowess.  What the other three have over him is they have had their programs better adjusted to college ball over the last three years.  In my opinion Jim's coming back down from the NFL, while great in many ways, has also hampered him in that he has projected a level of competence from his staff and players that you just don't get at the college level.  This off season has been one of reckoning for him and he is now making the adjustments required to succeed with the talent that the college game gives him.  We will be a top program shortly, leaving the two pedophile enabling schools in the dust.

06/25/2018 - 1:28pm Ohio State's only goal here…

Ohio State's only goal here is to prevent us from winning, so they're going to walk away feeling like they "won" unless we win the whole thing.  It's pretty obvious.  I'd rather we wipe them off the map and stick it in their face than win but that's just me.