OT(ish?) - My U of M Freshman Moves In a Week From Today!

Do massive amounts of drugs. Or maybe therapy?? Whichever you think is best.

dropped oldest son off at training camp about 2 weeks ago (not at U of M).  his freshman year, our second child to go away.  lot of prayer involved for all the kids.  can get you verklempt.  feels empty at home with only 5 kids there.  

as probably most parents say, its 'bittersweet'.  right now it seems more bitter, but very happy for my college kids. 

Can't offer advice for you as my kids are young. 

For your son - 

• Always go to class, even you don't want to (i swear this is 75% of succeeding in Michigan's classes for Freshman),
• Drink a lot of water if you're drinking
• Take advantage of what's around you: participate, join, attend, try-out, play, and get involved

My biggest regrets from college are the things i didn't do or didn't even know about because I was too busy working, drinking or doing nothing.

Yes,

My daughter starts at Indiana next week, my wife and I moved her in at the beginning of this week and I must admit that I balled like a baby. She is my oldest and I swear I just brought her home from the hospital a month ago. She is super excited and ready to go, but it is a big adjustment as a parent. I remember back when my older brother left to go to college (Michigan) it seemed like I rarely saw him again except on holidays so I half expect that my little girl is all done with living at home as well.

Dropped mine off at South Quad as a 1st year student last fall.   That was the saddest drive down State Street afterwards.   Ample tears were shed.   But you just have to drive away.  Don't linger.  Don't dwell.   Don't offer for the eighth time to take them to Target, Meijer, or Costco to pick up more supplies.  Give him a final huge hug, tell them you love them more than words can describe, provide words of encouragement, and let them figure it out.

We drive my daughter back to Ann Arbor next Wednesday.  She's so excited to return.   And that makes me extremely happy.  I just hope the State St. drive exiting Ann Arbor won't be as sad this year.   

Here's a piece of advice for you. If you walk into his junior year house after a home football game unannounced, you might not like what you find.

My mom learned this lesson the hard way lol

Congrats. Mine is a senior. Enjoy the ride. It goes fast. West Quad is the best Quad. 

South Quad is a Good Quad, but East Quad is the Best Quad.

My daughter moves into East Quad next Wednesday.  She's an only child, so this is empty nest for us.  She has always done well in school without much effort, so my biggest concern is how she reacts when she realizes she is now only average.  We'll see.

It was two years ago that we dropped off Miss Hatter off at Bursley and it was a very bittersweet experience.  I was so proud of all the work she did to get in (and with a big scholarship), but it was hard seeing my little girl grow up.  Mrs. Hatter completely lost her shit and balled like a toddler the entire way home, luckily I was able to keep it together and just shed a quiet tear later on when no one was looking. 

The advice I gave her was to avoid alcohol, but feel free to smoke as much weed as she wanted.  No one ever woke up with a sore ass and no pants after smoking a couple joints, but that's the sort of thing that downing a 5th of vodka can lead to.

Congratulations by the way.  He's there in large part because of you.

Ahh, kid humble brags.  I love doing that.

My son moved out a few years ago (WMU - Biochem major, starting senior year).  He is getting engaged this weekend.  I see him all the time though as he and his soon-to-be-fiance do their laundry at our house still.  He is also a (well) paid intern at a protein design company here in the same building I work in, so I get to go out and have beers with him now and then after work.  Because of his internship, his senior thesis project is already completed.  He is planning on getting his PhD somewhere down south .... Alabama, Arkansas, Mississippi etc.

My daughter is moving out next month.  Excellently, she is moving into the same apartment complex as my son ... they'll be 2 buildings apart, which is awesome because they're best friends as well as brother and sister.  She just graduated high school but due to AP classes and taking college courses at the local community college her senior year of high school, she is an 18 year old college sophomore.  It'll take her 3 to 3.5 years to get her B.S. (also WMU - Biochem major).  She doesn't know if she wants to parlay the Biochem into a PhD but she is determined to at least get her masters.

I never cried or anything when my son moved out ... I'm sure I won't when my daughter moves out ... I am actually really excited about being an empty nester.  I am 40.  Wife is 38. and my son is 21.  Been married almost 22 years, so we started young.  We never had the party hard years of the 18-25 years olds.  So now is our time, and we have more $ than 18-25 year olds to boot!)

Yea I'll miss them but the overwhelming feeling of pride that my wife and I raised two extremely intelligent, well rounded, sophisticated (for their age) young adults offsets that.  Both kids work.  Both make > $15 an hour with their own 401k, health insurance, car insurance .... it fills me with so much pride to see them kicking life's ass and it easily overwhelms the sadness.

End not-so-humble-brag-about-my-kids

I'm there with you, I moved my only surviving daughter (lost two babies as infants) into the Iowa Dorms this past Saturday for her Freshman year.  I'm divorced, so I'm truly an empty nester.  Managing the emotions is rough.  My best advice is, don't fight them, they're natural and a part of you.

There are 3 things you need to tell him when you are ready to leave him at the dorm.

1. I love you

2. I'm proud of you

3. You're going to do great

Anything else you say is fine, but those three sentences are highly important.

Best of luck to you, your wife, and your son.

I just did this last week. Spent a few days in Louisiana, visited New Orleans, then dropped my youngest off at LSU for her freshman year. Flew back Friday night, Saturday morning drove the oldest up to Nevada Reno for her sophomore year. Very bittersweet. Yes, lots of tears saying goodbye at the airport in Baton Rouge and then again on my ride home from Reno. It's part of life but I miss my girls. 

Advice to them is always be aware of your surroundings, don't leave a friend(s) alone at a party especially if they've been drinking a lot, have fun and enjoy the time as it'll go by fast. 

I did this last week with my only daughter for her sophomore year (she went a week early to move into a sorority house and joyfully reunite with her sisters and work on the Rush gymnastics).

Last year--very sad.

This year--happy for her.....

All the hard work is done--watch your body of work results with enthusiasm--they got the info, let 'em use it.....

Happy is better than Sad.

Congrats to your son & your family! I can remember everything about moving our son in to his dorm for the first time. He was our youngest and it was indeed a big change but it was a good change - just another stage of life to be experienced and enjoyed. I will say this though - I’m really glad our daughter elected to attend school close to home. I would have missed her terribly.

Hang in there Dad! It will all be good. Blessings to you and your family!

My nephew moves into MoJo next week.....hard to imagine the little 1 year old causing a ruckus at my wedding is now going to cause a ruckus in Ann Arbor - like his mother, father, uncle and aunt!

Crazy.

Was just thinking about move in the other day; no idea how it was 14 years ago that I moved into Bates II. Time flies. 

Honestly, I’m jealous of your son. I’d give anything to go back and be starting college again...

No need to worry...he'll be fine!

The fact that you got your son to the stage where he got accepted into UM is pretty amazing, just try to focus on that. Congratulations!

My children are never allowed to grow up so this isn't a concern of mine, but I feel your combination of excitement and nervousness.  

Wow, your thread brings back memories of 11 years ago when we dropped off our daughter at Markley for her freshman year.  Other than the start of RR's term as head coach, what a memorable day it was.  But honestly it wasn't that hard emotionally for us.  We live in Ann Arbor, so we could still see all the time.  What was REAL hard, was taking her down to the airport a year or so after she graduated when she headed off to the Peace Corps in Mongolia for 27 months.  Time flies though my friend.  Enjoy this day and all the following days.  As we all know here, your 4 years at Michigan are the best years of your life and they fly by way too quickly.  Going to graduate school isn't even close to the same experience.  So, I guess that's my best piece of advice to convey.  Don't waste these 4 years and take advantage of all the positive experiences available at such a great place as U-M.  

I wrote a letter to each of them that they could only open after we left campus (neither attended Michigan). I wrote them over the course of a week, giving me time to think about what I wanted to say. Many, many tears while authoring those things. I'm pretty sure they each have their letter today, several years after graduation.

To minimize the tears on those move-in days, I focused on the logistics of moving in and setting them up in their dorm rooms. Then, we made the goodbyes as quick as possible. It still generated tears for MGoWife and me, but not enough to embarrass them.

I also tried to focus on their exciting journeys and kept thinking back on my first day in Ann Arbor. I too lived in South Quad (West Quad sucks) and I remember move-in day vividly. The dudes down the hall had a case of beer and an open door, so it was good. Also, one of they guys across the hall became my best friend - we roomed together our entire time in Ann Arbor and I always stay with him when I come to town. 

More sexytime.

You're gonna cry, man. A lot.

Best advice: Remind him and all the other the other kids on his South Quad hall that fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life. Some of the kids at Bursley Hall back in the fall of 1978 could have used that advice, because they did not return for the spring of 1979.

Good luck to him and Go Blue!

Exciting times! Congratulations all around, to your son, to your wife, to you. To Michigan too for keeping the link going.

You're right that things will change a lot but over time, it will be less than it seems at first.

Heck, he may even move back in. That's usually a joke — or a complaint by outsiders who don't know you — and it didn't happen with my sons. BUT my sister's 3 kids were in and out for years, for temporary jobs, for further schooling, and she and my brother-in-law loved it.

In any case, trust your foundation. In college and after, time and maybe distance will separate you but you're family. You're still deeply connected. (Now I'm getting teary.)

Dropped my oldest off at Bowling Green yesterday.  Bittersweet.   Excited for him and his new opportunities.  Weird not having him around.