Sorry this is late. I've been really busy. Actually no I've been kind of busy and wasting time following recruiting and watching the Citrus Bowl again and again.
/watches Citrus Bowl again.
Ahhhh. Man having that game recorded is like when my family got a VCR and they put the whole original Star Wars trilogy on TV like right after. That was followed by weeks of the most beautiful weather in Michigan history that I didn't go outside for, by the end of which I could pull everything about Star Wars from memory for the rest of my life, and I STILL wasn't sick of it.
Bronx made the obvious analogy:
To say Dave Brandon is reminiscent of George Lucas is not fair to either man, but the worst characteristics of both mirror each other quite well; both Lucas and Brandon truly loved the worlds they held dominion over, but were so tone-deaf, so blind to the realities of how those worlds were perceived under their stewardships that they threatened to irreparably sully their images.
I'd extend the analogy to say Hackett was the J.J. Abrams we brought in to rescue the franchise, and 2015 was his Force Awakens. IE a lot of it was simply a renunciation of the crap that immediately preceded it, and banging the audience over the head with the things we loved about the originals.
But in light of where we were, that was refreshing. Yes I did see (SPOILER) Jim Harbaugh pilot an X-wing down a trench to destroy a planet-sized world-destroying base of faceless bad guys again. The thing is that hasn't gotten old. We needed a reset, and got one, and should be totally satisfied. As for whoever follows JJ and JH, yeah man, take it in your own direction.
The next movie has a lot to live up to. Expectations are high, but so is that schedule. Alum96 went through the thing and decided that Michigan doesn't have a Big Two-Little Eight schedule anymore, but it's a standard Power 5 trip. How MSU and OSU rebuild will matter much.
Crutin needs updating. Incredibly useful Alum96 also is due for another 2016 class projection since this series has been fairly accurate at predicting things so far. He got Terrance Davis wrong, but had Dylan Crawford and David Long in the highest category of guys who as of last December seemed to favor someone else.
Squinting at his info and that provided by the board in the weeks hence you can kind of piece together a class that would take Gary, LaVert, Raulerson, Hudson and Nordin as long as they are amenable, plus a tight end (Allen or Asiasi), one or two DTs (Elliott, Tagaloa, Dwumfour, …?), another LB (Mbem-Bosse?) and 2-3 WRs (McDoom/N. Johnson/Donald Stewart/Pie). Call a guy not taking officials and a guy who is taking officials to Temple gone and Metellus a Jeremy Clark* grayshirt and that's what: 28? WRITE ANOTHER ONE ALUM WE HAVE TO KNOW!
Did you miss these gifs? Red_Lee is Michiganfreek. IE he makes awesome gifs like LSUfreek does for college football in general. For example:
Opponents Watch needs updating. Now more than a week old, Hail_Yes wrote about the teams M basketball has played, and what they've been up to this year since we formed opinions on them on the court. I'd like to see objects in the future, e.g. Michigan State. What's been going on with MSU hoops lately? They're just pounding everybody because Valentine's back now right? I haven't looked.
Etc. This is OT but it's a wonderful story about MLK visiting Grosse Pointe in 1968. The Maizer followed up on my bowl eligibility proposal with his own, which is a ranking system. M baseball preview. No, Dakich=/=Spike, they're not even like-sized. This month in MGoBlog 10 years ago history was all about Lloyd shuffling coordinators to set up his retirement.
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OMIGOD NCAA FOOTBALL 2025 for the 2017 season with 2013 rosters?
The night of the Nat Championship EA put an EKG on NCAA2014's Facebook page. The world took this to mean that we might…just might finally go back to having new covers every year for the NCAA game. I guess it would mean a playoff is finally possible. I also probably shouldn't rip on them since I'm on year 2041 of a four-player dynasty* I have thoroughly enjoyed. Please leave Denard on the cover and tweak the game.
*We all got to pick each others' starting teams and one guy turned UMass into a national power that's still ripping off our recruits.
PRESENTING: THE IRON D
Ladies and gentlemen, the trophy you've all been waiting for, the Michigan vs Michigan State in Joe Louis Arena game that used to replace the best home game of your ticket package and now does that and isn't much of a rivalry anymore to be honest, the one, the only, here it is…
It is an iron d.
WHO SAID THIS IN THE MOVIES YOU ARE EMBARRSSED TO ADMIT YOU LOVE THREAD?
People listed some classic films—Wet Hot and A League of Their Own are consensus good—but this one…oh man this one:
It wasn't hated Sockface. While it was indeed "ambitious" (read: up its own ass) it also gave off a very George Lucas "I don't have to listen to anyone anymore because I made the Dark Knight" vibe. Not a bad movie, and at times it was stunning, but if it's the start of a Nolan trajectory into Jar Jar, well, this is our concern man.
Also put me among the Titanic crowd; the ship looks great.
ETC. Guy on board taking photoshop requests. Someone told me last night that Heiko got one of the top placements in the country for his field and I am zero surprised because that guy is a genius for whom "I got Michigan's cranky offensive coordinator to like me" has already been shoved to a footnote on his resume. Tom Harmon vs. porn? Jim Hackett is awesome.
YOUR MOMENT OF ZEN:
Things from the past. AC1997 this week decided to do one of those regular “What are the Michigan basketball alums up to?” posts. Only thing to add to it is that Darius Morris hasn’t caught on with anyone this year because he’s hurt, via his Twitter.
AC added at the end that he’d like someone to do the same for hockey. I give you three guesses who took him up on that. Not Blueline, that’s Adam. Not Center Ice, but where is Center Ice lately—like I see him on twitter and that’s it. C’mon it’s hockey it’s easy.
Things that should stay in the past. Before The Query, MGoBlog was doing fine. You could log in, log out, post things, read things, and even neg things. Then a part of the system once thought dead and buried started getting hits. Super-expensive servers across the nation were suddenly taxed to their limits, unable to deny a request to reconstruct pages that hadn’t been cached since “At least it’s not [the year we went 7-5]” was thought to be some kind of wise perspective.
We have found the culprit: Maize.Blue Wagner has been sifting through the nether regions of MGoBlog, posts with zero previous views because what you see was downloaded from its original blogspot page. Wagner has created a summary of all the things Brian wrote ten years ago this month, plus one thing Jon Chait (!) wrote.
Things from the future? Prior to Ace’s recruiting roundup we were thinking of posting an eagle’s eye view of the class going into the dead period. Then the venerable alum96 wrote it in the diaries. He has some sound opinions on guys who might not remain in the class considering some of the shopping they’ve been doing. I like Michigan’s chances of getting David Long more than alum does and don’t really know where Nordin/grayshirt is coming from (I mean I know the board it’s coming from but not sure where that’s coming from).
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HOW WE GOT IT BETTER THAN THEY
MGoKev found an old story on the origins of “Who’s got it better than us?” You can click to find out, or just believe me that it was the line Jim Harbaugh yelled upon emerging from a vat of electrified spilled chemicals during a lab test to create a superhuman. Yes, Jim Harbaugh is a Marvel character; go ahead and doubt me.
BYRD FINALLY GETS THE BIRD
Maryland’s stadium is now “Maryland Stadium” after they finally decided that being a bad president for a long time didn’t make up for being a major segregationist. Coincidentally the student who led the petition to change it was also named Byrd. JLo nailed it re: missed opportunity:
BECAUSE THEY ARE A PESTILENCE
A guy who lives in Columbus wanted to know why we hate Michigan State so bad here.
- They are actually about half the state and bunch together in certain places.
- The biggest hive of Michigan State fans isn’t the blog with the best content or the recruiting site with the best information; it’s the Red Cedar Message Board, which has more per capita trolls than any place on the internet. That is both a reflection on the makeup of their everything-hating fanbase, and a driver of it.
- Their media are unbearable and ubiquitous in town. Until recently they owned all the local sports talk radio and filled those seats with Mike Valenti and Pat Caputo, both of whom will spend more time ripping or trolling Michigan than on content related to Michigan State. And they have Graham Couch.
Basically imagine those Bucks except they hate everything and you most of all.
Etc. Two good gift ideas. Dakota Prukop is surprisingly the name of a potential grad transfer QB, and not a character in the new Star Wars movie, though his tape reminds me a lot of Forcier. A 4-team playoff is not the best model; 6 is. Watch video of the bust. The Dab.
Your Moment of Zen:
We'll get to the important thing but first wow this UFR Visualization tool by grozzy is useful. For example here's how much of an outlier Desmond Morgan's game vs Minnesota was:
Small request: the numbers always get thrown off by how many plays are in a game. I wonder if the visualizer could adjust for that by making it points per charted play.
Okay the important thing:
Yes, MGoReaders, a plurality of you have correct taste in cereal. For the record, the entire MGoStaff voted for Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Not only did they perfectly pull off the miniaturization of Angelo's specialty, but they knew to add just the right amount of cinnamon to make the post-cereal milk-slurp experience the BEST.
Also apparently a minority of you are colorblind and can't tell who won from the above chart because everything looks like blue or green. And a minority of that minority blamed me instead of the OP for that. Hey it ain't my fault you (probably) lack red cones a thing our primate ancestors developed pretty late in the story to be able to spot berries. My grandpa had that; they put him in the lead plane in WWII because tank camouflage didn't work on him.
[Hit THE JUMP to learn what happens if Michigan wins out and you call Keith Jackson]
Before this season, some betting site was looking for someone in Michigan media to take/write-up the under on 7.5 wins, and got me to bite. I figured falling short of 4-3 versus @Utah, BYU, MSU, OSU, @PSU, @Maryland and @Minnesota was foreseeable, since bad things do happen, and whatever deity was in charge of whom they happen to was the George Lucas of gods.
The George Lucas God of Football creates an amazing thing that you will buy into, then turns it on you because he misunderstands what made his original, authentic creation so awesome, and he is immune to being told otherwise.
The George Lucas God is gone, his opus now in the hands of one of its earliest and geekiest fans. You know this geek has been quite successful—like he turned Stanford Trek into a good movie, before turning around the Mission Impossible franchise. You know he was left plenty to work with. You see trailers that confirm this could not suck. When do you believe again?
There's just a 2.1% chance my 7-win prediction comes true. There's a much higher chance this one could be as good as 1969's A New Hope. I still can't get myself to believe, but the numbers are there. There's even a scenario where…
[After the JUMP: a thing Rutgers is good at]
Falk getting his. From the Jug thread.
Dear Diary took a bye last week and it couldn't have come at a better time. My football place was pretty sore for the 168 hours after the one with poor Paul Bunyan being mandled by the least deserving yups to ever play for a program I am preconditioned to think the worst about.
Misery for our company. CR found some more football fans for our healing circle by consulting novelist Jon Rowe, who offered a list of commensurate moments. A sampling:
- The Band is On the Field from Stanford's perspective
- Leon Lett's muff
- Auburn returns Bama's field goal attempt
- Baylor gets a 99-yard fumble return on its face when it could have kneeled
- Furman goes for 2 up 15-14 with 7 seconds left, but its 2-point conversion is intercepted and returned and they lose 15-16.
- The immaculate reception
- Wait, what? Why is the MSU game on this list I thought I'm supposed to feel better?
- In range for a field goal to avoid a historic upset…AGAIN? Stop bringing up Michigan!
- An uncharacteristic offensive explosion should have ended when Anthony T—
- Colorado, down…STTTTTTTOOOOPPPPP@!@@@@@@@
In conclusion every bit of luck that goes our way ever again is wholly deserved, not that we'll be able to enjoy it because self-awareness is cruel.
Self-awareness isn't always cruel. Math—I mean good math—doesn't do things like overrate the last thing to happen. And out of the randomness comes good news from our resident advanced stats collator Ecky Pting:
Ecky also did this last week for win probabilities. Right now we are looking at 9 or 10 wins most likely, which is to say Ohio State's a coinflip and 85% we get there without collecting any dust. And if you like statistics dust, here's a quaint little piece from the 1980s. It's called "Good at Football Again"
Etc. Alum96 has the stock report and a By the Numbers on Minnesota in the forums. MaizeJacket should update the Coaching Changes diary before we discuss. Best and Worst and Inside the Boxscore from last week.
[Hit THE JUMP for Harbaugh costumes layman's guess at 2016's QB]