spoiler alert: i linked this
Left: Jim and Sam, who is smiling, because when is he not? Right: Little Demo, who is giving the look big demo used to give little defensive linemen
Last February I went to that Harbaugh & Harbaugh thing that inducted the brothers into the Pioneer HS Hall of Fame. As part of the charity auction they had each brother sign a Pioneer helmet. First they auctioned John’s helmet, but Jim Harbaugh outbid everyone. Jim sat down with his new John Harbaugh helmet, and signed the other side.
Then they auctioned the one Jim signed. A lot of people bid, including my friend Matt Demorest, but now it’s a competition: John outbid them all, signed his far more expensive helmet, and sat it back down in front of Sam Webb, instructing the auctioneer that he was donating it back to the cause.
So here’s the auctioneer, who can’t figure out what just happened even though the audience had tracked it well enough. On the other end of the table there’s Jim glaring like this is going to end in a wrestling match. In between them are Sam and Ira smiling like their teeth can keep them from bursting out laughing.
Jim leaps up and jams his helmet into the auctioneer’s hands: “I’m donating this back too.” The auctioneer’s like okay…throws out a number near what John Harbaugh just paid, and for a moment it’s silent before Demorest stands up with a massive finger in the air. His kid pumps his fist and goes “YES!” Sam loses it.
So if you’re wondering where your money goes when you buy or refinance with Matt, yeah, he just blows it all on hats. Fortunately it doesn’t cost you much since Homesure Lending is a small shop without the usual overhead, and you’ll make that back in a few months of your less expensive mortgage. Good deal.
ON OTHER MEMORABILIA:
User Jay Z bought a copy of this print, and was trying to figure out game; the readers figured out it’s 1989 Maryland. In the process it inspired two more threads: mine on your favorite memorabilia, and Wolverine Historian’s list of things the stadium used to have in 1989 that it doesn’t have now.
- Backflips off the front row
- Flinging toilet paper
- Drinking beer in the stands
- Packed student section
Go in there’s gifs and discussion.
On the bits of memorabilia, M Fanfare put you all to shame:
And finally, probably the most unusual piece of UM memorabilia I own, given to me by one of my groomsmen when I got married. It's from a book written by a UM geology professor right after World War I about why, in his opinion, the war broke out. But what makes it unique is who owned this particular copy. The author inscribed it to him.
"To Fielding H. Yost, With the best regards of Wm H. Hobbs, Ann Arbor, Oct 3, 1922."
To those of you who bought bits of the old turf, that was all the doing of Bob Lipson, the guy who created and produced Michigan Replay.
[After the JUMP: I woke up at 5:30 this morning with a burning desire to write something on Tunsil, in case you want to hear me make the same case Brian already made today.]
THE WORST ELECTION IN HISTORY. My favorite Youtuber CGP Grey loves talking about how electoral processes can subvert the will of the electorate (of the animal kingdom—no politics). Grey’s choice for “worst election in history” was the latest U.K. one, but the professors may change his mind when he sees how the NCAA’s vote on satellite camps turned this electorate…
…into a vote for green. As it says in the title, Mr. Elbel went about the internet collecting published opinions from coaches and administrators. Keep in mind that the Power 5 conferences on the left count double, but still, the totals:
AGAINST BAN: 39
IN FAVOR OF BAN: 20
HAVEN’T SAID YET: 51
ON FENCE, LEANING AGAINST BAN: 10
ON FENCE, LEANING IN FAVOR OF BAN: 6
NO OPINION; UNSURE: 2
I couldn’t exactly recreate his breakdown. Like in that HBO Kevin Spacey movie (which is not reality), one side showed up ready to leverage every crack for a victory while the other sat there disorganized and oblivious to what was going on. That’s how the dill hole at Texas State could vote to duke his own coach, and the Pac-12’s representative could be manipulated to vote against his whole conference.
Going forward the concern here is that the version the Pac-12 was trying to avoid—the one that basically says Harbaugh can’t go to Bowling Green’s camp but the vice versa is okay—might get passed instead, since it addresses the main concern of those Other Five undecideds, many of whom are inclined to vote against the Big Ten out of dislike for Delany.
Mr. Elbel is the Diary Dude of the week.
SPEAKING OF CORRUPT THINGS RUN BY JERK-OFFS stephenrjking was inspired by the stupid Hobey vote to offer…um…reforms for college hockey. Here perhaps the troublesome bloc working for parochial advantages to the detriment of the sport are the small eastern schools, for whom moving a playoff game from a campus arena to the NHL Garden four subway stops down the line is a boon. Of course nobody wins by having the Frozen Four in Tampa, except whomever’s pockets get lined by the Tampa tourism bureau.
#ISTANDWITHACE STANDS WITH ACE, IF YOU CAN CONVINCE ACE TO STAND THERE. Brian has this pet opinion that Happy Gilmore is a terrible movie. I’ll admit I haven’t watched it since college, when my opinions on movies were clouded by, um, clouds. Though never meaning to take an extremist position on the subject, poor Ace kind of became the defender by default of an Adam Sandler movie. The argument took to Twitter last week, where a final vote decided that Ace is correct.
In MGoSlack chat, BiSB made the comparison of Sandler movies to Nickelback: no one production is so awful itself but whole of the suck is worse than the sum of its parts. Of course if your position is “this thing I am defending is like Nickelback” you’ve already lost.
THROWBACK THREAD DAY: The wiki hasn’t been updated in ages, so this thread on great funny threads in history was a fun one. Some of the classics:
- Wife Day
- The time WolverineInaBag outed himself while pretending to be a visiting Bama insider
- Nebraska fan says hai guys, perfect response, thread locked.
- Rich Rod’s staff has a netmeeting
I should probably do a Dear Diary all-time article one of these days.
YOUR MOMENT OF ZEN:
— Channing Stribling (@C_Strib8) April 19, 2016
And you can’t have one without the other
— Channing Stribling (@C_Strib8) April 19, 2016
I have heard your cries; it's time to catch up on the quasi-offseason's user-generated content.
What the… heck is that pic above? Markp (the p is for photoshop) decided to mock up the Big House with a couple of upper decks, and colored in the endzones themselves. I present without comment. For the record, Brian turned me around on the luxury boxes exactly ten years ago this week.
Every snap by QB. DGDestroys broke up every snap of the spring game by quarterback, because just being a good dude wasn’t enough to justify his existence on the planet and he just had to make himself ludicrously useful. I plan to Hennechart this. DGDestroys is your Diary Dude of the Week.
More Don Brown D: Space Coyote took issue with the assertion that Michigan's D was doing some Spartan D-like things, and went about discussing what Brown's Cover 2 concepts look like, i.e. why it's not really a base "Quarters". This is the upshot:
But at the end of the day, [Brown] is a "multiple" coach, which Michigan has almost always been dating back a long time. This, in and of itself, makes it very different than what MSU and OSU are doing.
The BC playbook that James Light made available that we're all pouring through does have a package called "Spartan" that does some of what MSU does (at right).
But that is page 144 of the playbook, i.e. just a thing they have to bring out against certain opponents or as a changeup, not the base thing. Brown's cover 2 is a kind of read, but it's not that kind of read.
This is all getting away from the more important distinction, which is that Michigan will line up their DL so the "Anchor" (strongside end) is outside the tackle. This widening the front to squeeze the LBs inside is an MSU characteristic too, though unrelated to the coverage system. One of the things it does is keeps the SAM clean so you can play a much lighter and quicker player there (e.g. Peppers). The tradeoff is your middle linebacker had better be good at thumpin' and getting off blocks.
Space Coyote is not your dude of the week, but he’s a Guy.
Worth discussion. Sharik followed up a diary about head injuries with various positive ideas for making football safer. Going to Rugby-style tackling rules and possession arrows for fumbles make paper sense, but it seems tougher to implement than making football men wear girdles, i.e. never going to happen. But making the equipment softer for the guy on the receiving end, especially helmets and shoulder pads, seems…plausible?
Changeup routes. Docwhoblocked went to Michigan’s recent coaching clinic and was moved to write up what he heard from, so far, three of the sessions he attended. Frank Beamer talked mostly about special teams. Art Briles was in there too but a lot of it was for coaches' ears and thus not that useful to you as a fan. But I found this bit interesting for the irony:
His offensive strategy: Tell the receivers to run as fast as they can and then tell the quarterback to throw it as far as he can.
Ironic because Smart Football last year wrote about how Briles's offense stretches the field diagonally by having receivers *not* run as fast as they can. The defense still has to cover the lollygaggers, which creates more space for whoever's streaking downfield, and sometimes get lulled to sleep by a trotting receiver who then turns on the jets. I bet Harbaugh starts using some lollygagging in his offense soon.
Doc also wrote up the Harbaugh, Harbaugh, and Harbaugh session.
[Hit the jump for a record hockey diaries]
This is the only correct recruiting strategy. [gif by Ace Anbender]
While I write this Michigan’s playing their first two softball games of the season, so excuse me if I get distracted. Freshman Alex Sobczak seems to have won the starting catcher position; so weird not to see Lauren Sweet back there. So far Betsa walked two and struck out three, and Sierra Lawrence reached on an error and Romero’s up.
Lol they walked Romero on 4 pitches. Scaredy-cocks!
Anyway, about all that reader-generated content:
Crootin. For some reason I guess recruiting was on diarists’ minds last week, so we got a lot of articles looking at it from different sides. Alum96 broke up top recruits by the major states that produce them. Among conclusions, Michigan’s home advantage is a lot like that of Clemson, IE we have an okay state but have to share it with another school with recent success. Ohio State, LSU and USC/UCLA have the most local talent with the least competition. Alum also had a primer on interested players for 2017, which has a lot more interesting players in Michigan, and still little interest in Michigan in Ohio.
Speaking of 2017 Alum96’s daily “Swim Lanes” were highly useful contributions during the stretch run (LSA Superstar jumped in to usurp his format once as well). Let’s see that thread go up for next class, man.
[Betsa’s shaky today. Hit a batter with bases loaded, then worked back from a 3-0 count for an inning-ending strikeout.]
Is it being addressed? NOLA Blue suggested an interesting method for analyzing recruiting: line up each position and call them wins or losses, though I couldn’t quite understand how his “eyeball” rating system worked. Anyway it gave me the idea to visualize the classes and STAR ratings I’ve been going on about by position.
Guys are listed by the final position they played (though now I’m wishing I moved Uche to SAM). I probably ought to have broken them out further for positions where you play more than a guy. The red balls are 4.5 or higher, the yellow ones are 3.8 to 4.4 stars, the green ones are that 3.5 to 3.7 range and the blues are the lower 3-stars and 2-stars and such. Ball size is scaled by the actual STAR rating squared.
Champswest also did a crootin comparison diary using total number of 4-stars and above (according to 247’s composite) acquired. The most interesting thing therein was the dichotomy between the Big Ten East (189 4- and 5-stars over the last 4 classes) and Big Ten West (39 total). Remove Michigan, Ohio State and Penn State, and the Big Ten East STILL has three more 4+ stars than the West. Good job, good effort Big Ten West.
Suggestion: Let’s make the B1G West a relegation division. Following last year’s performance Rutgers can move down to the West and Iowa jumps up to the East.
[Hit the jump for Beilein in context. Meanwhile Michigan’s already up 11-2 in the 4th, South Carolina just walked the bases loaded, and guess who’s coming up to bat? Hint: she’s the NCAA record-holder for career grand slams.]
Sorry this is late. I've been really busy. Actually no I've been kind of busy and wasting time following recruiting and watching the Citrus Bowl again and again.
/watches Citrus Bowl again.
Ahhhh. Man having that game recorded is like when my family got a VCR and they put the whole original Star Wars trilogy on TV like right after. That was followed by weeks of the most beautiful weather in Michigan history that I didn't go outside for, by the end of which I could pull everything about Star Wars from memory for the rest of my life, and I STILL wasn't sick of it.
Bronx made the obvious analogy:
To say Dave Brandon is reminiscent of George Lucas is not fair to either man, but the worst characteristics of both mirror each other quite well; both Lucas and Brandon truly loved the worlds they held dominion over, but were so tone-deaf, so blind to the realities of how those worlds were perceived under their stewardships that they threatened to irreparably sully their images.
I'd extend the analogy to say Hackett was the J.J. Abrams we brought in to rescue the franchise, and 2015 was his Force Awakens. IE a lot of it was simply a renunciation of the crap that immediately preceded it, and banging the audience over the head with the things we loved about the originals.
But in light of where we were, that was refreshing. Yes I did see (SPOILER) Jim Harbaugh pilot an X-wing down a trench to destroy a planet-sized world-destroying base of faceless bad guys again. The thing is that hasn't gotten old. We needed a reset, and got one, and should be totally satisfied. As for whoever follows JJ and JH, yeah man, take it in your own direction.
The next movie has a lot to live up to. Expectations are high, but so is that schedule. Alum96 went through the thing and decided that Michigan doesn't have a Big Two-Little Eight schedule anymore, but it's a standard Power 5 trip. How MSU and OSU rebuild will matter much.
Crutin needs updating. Incredibly useful Alum96 also is due for another 2016 class projection since this series has been fairly accurate at predicting things so far. He got Terrance Davis wrong, but had Dylan Crawford and David Long in the highest category of guys who as of last December seemed to favor someone else.
Squinting at his info and that provided by the board in the weeks hence you can kind of piece together a class that would take Gary, LaVert, Raulerson, Hudson and Nordin as long as they are amenable, plus a tight end (Allen or Asiasi), one or two DTs (Elliott, Tagaloa, Dwumfour, …?), another LB (Mbem-Bosse?) and 2-3 WRs (McDoom/N. Johnson/Donald Stewart/Pie). Call a guy not taking officials and a guy who is taking officials to Temple gone and Metellus a Jeremy Clark* grayshirt and that's what: 28? WRITE ANOTHER ONE ALUM WE HAVE TO KNOW!
Did you miss these gifs? Red_Lee is Michiganfreek. IE he makes awesome gifs like LSUfreek does for college football in general. For example:
Opponents Watch needs updating. Now more than a week old, Hail_Yes wrote about the teams M basketball has played, and what they've been up to this year since we formed opinions on them on the court. I'd like to see objects in the future, e.g. Michigan State. What's been going on with MSU hoops lately? They're just pounding everybody because Valentine's back now right? I haven't looked.
Etc. This is OT but it's a wonderful story about MLK visiting Grosse Pointe in 1968. The Maizer followed up on my bowl eligibility proposal with his own, which is a ranking system. M baseball preview. No, Dakich=/=Spike, they're not even like-sized. This month in MGoBlog 10 years ago history was all about Lloyd shuffling coordinators to set up his retirement.
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OMIGOD NCAA FOOTBALL 2025 for the 2017 season with 2013 rosters?
The night of the Nat Championship EA put an EKG on NCAA2014's Facebook page. The world took this to mean that we might…just might finally go back to having new covers every year for the NCAA game. I guess it would mean a playoff is finally possible. I also probably shouldn't rip on them since I'm on year 2041 of a four-player dynasty* I have thoroughly enjoyed. Please leave Denard on the cover and tweak the game.
*We all got to pick each others' starting teams and one guy turned UMass into a national power that's still ripping off our recruits.
PRESENTING: THE IRON D
Ladies and gentlemen, the trophy you've all been waiting for, the Michigan vs Michigan State in Joe Louis Arena game that used to replace the best home game of your ticket package and now does that and isn't much of a rivalry anymore to be honest, the one, the only, here it is…
It is an iron d.
WHO SAID THIS IN THE MOVIES YOU ARE EMBARRSSED TO ADMIT YOU LOVE THREAD?
People listed some classic films—Wet Hot and A League of Their Own are consensus good—but this one…oh man this one:
It wasn't hated Sockface. While it was indeed "ambitious" (read: up its own ass) it also gave off a very George Lucas "I don't have to listen to anyone anymore because I made the Dark Knight" vibe. Not a bad movie, and at times it was stunning, but if it's the start of a Nolan trajectory into Jar Jar, well, this is our concern man.
Also put me among the Titanic crowd; the ship looks great.
ETC. Guy on board taking photoshop requests. Someone told me last night that Heiko got one of the top placements in the country for his field and I am zero surprised because that guy is a genius for whom "I got Michigan's cranky offensive coordinator to like me" has already been shoved to a footnote on his resume. Tom Harmon vs. porn? Jim Hackett is awesome.
YOUR MOMENT OF ZEN:
Things from the past. AC1997 this week decided to do one of those regular “What are the Michigan basketball alums up to?” posts. Only thing to add to it is that Darius Morris hasn’t caught on with anyone this year because he’s hurt, via his Twitter.
AC added at the end that he’d like someone to do the same for hockey. I give you three guesses who took him up on that. Not Blueline, that’s Adam. Not Center Ice, but where is Center Ice lately—like I see him on twitter and that’s it. C’mon it’s hockey it’s easy.
Things that should stay in the past. Before The Query, MGoBlog was doing fine. You could log in, log out, post things, read things, and even neg things. Then a part of the system once thought dead and buried started getting hits. Super-expensive servers across the nation were suddenly taxed to their limits, unable to deny a request to reconstruct pages that hadn’t been cached since “At least it’s not [the year we went 7-5]” was thought to be some kind of wise perspective.
We have found the culprit: Maize.Blue Wagner has been sifting through the nether regions of MGoBlog, posts with zero previous views because what you see was downloaded from its original blogspot page. Wagner has created a summary of all the things Brian wrote ten years ago this month, plus one thing Jon Chait (!) wrote.
Things from the future? Prior to Ace’s recruiting roundup we were thinking of posting an eagle’s eye view of the class going into the dead period. Then the venerable alum96 wrote it in the diaries. He has some sound opinions on guys who might not remain in the class considering some of the shopping they’ve been doing. I like Michigan’s chances of getting David Long more than alum does and don’t really know where Nordin/grayshirt is coming from (I mean I know the board it’s coming from but not sure where that’s coming from).
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HOW WE GOT IT BETTER THAN THEY
MGoKev found an old story on the origins of “Who’s got it better than us?” You can click to find out, or just believe me that it was the line Jim Harbaugh yelled upon emerging from a vat of electrified spilled chemicals during a lab test to create a superhuman. Yes, Jim Harbaugh is a Marvel character; go ahead and doubt me.
BYRD FINALLY GETS THE BIRD
Maryland’s stadium is now “Maryland Stadium” after they finally decided that being a bad president for a long time didn’t make up for being a major segregationist. Coincidentally the student who led the petition to change it was also named Byrd. JLo nailed it re: missed opportunity:
BECAUSE THEY ARE A PESTILENCE
A guy who lives in Columbus wanted to know why we hate Michigan State so bad here.
- They are actually about half the state and bunch together in certain places.
- The biggest hive of Michigan State fans isn’t the blog with the best content or the recruiting site with the best information; it’s the Red Cedar Message Board, which has more per capita trolls than any place on the internet. That is both a reflection on the makeup of their everything-hating fanbase, and a driver of it.
- Their media are unbearable and ubiquitous in town. Until recently they owned all the local sports talk radio and filled those seats with Mike Valenti and Pat Caputo, both of whom will spend more time ripping or trolling Michigan than on content related to Michigan State. And they have Graham Couch.
Basically imagine those Bucks except they hate everything and you most of all.
Etc. Two good gift ideas. Dakota Prukop is surprisingly the name of a potential grad transfer QB, and not a character in the new Star Wars movie, though his tape reminds me a lot of Forcier. A 4-team playoff is not the best model; 6 is. Watch video of the bust. The Dab.
Your Moment of Zen: