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Recent Comments

Date Title Body
08/27/2014 - 9:56pm An Immediate Decision Long-contemplated
I have decided to terminate and not accept further certain demographic pro bono clients in proportion to negbangs visited upon me here for their obvious demographic and political motivations. You have cost your communities three client representations tonight and, in process, boosted my firm's profits and I am the managing partner. Please continue, my next vacation is already paid for by your purported interest-voting.  Keep it up.
08/27/2014 - 9:10pm Maybe and
Perhaps she got the Brazilian wax. Less-worse than Brent, and that's coming so brace in position and prepare for crash landing. Muffburger will occupy three hours with Csont'e York highlights. Brace.
08/27/2014 - 8:40pm True, Chemical Warfare Is Preferable
Nevermind the Ebola. But Brent Mussburgers?! We'll be okay with Not-Brent.
08/27/2014 - 5:45pm Oh Noes
"Mental errors." Bad portent. Like, when have we heard that before. Sad panda. Panda want cry. Still, panda watch anyway.
08/27/2014 - 5:22pm Insightful yet misguided
Generation X:  We were farmed on cereal grains and sugars. Heck, I subsisted on charms, crunchberries, trix and quisp not to mention cocoa puffs and The Count's chocolate victims. I still pee colors of the trix rainbow despite not having consumed trix for decades.
After breakfast we boosted our sugar highs with crackerjack like young crack addicts. It was glorious indulgence, and we heightened our pleasure by sedentary monitoring of brain-destroying Gilligan's Island.
Unsurprisingly, a high number of my U-M classmates are diabetics and their pancreae probably resemble sieves. Still, we did get into Michigan. You are certainly correct regarding Pelini but that sad disability attributes to Ohio.
08/27/2014 - 4:06pm Our Defense Will Improve
As others have observed here, Ty can now focus on learning each opponent's style of play with zeal. This should strengthen our practice squad and by extension the defense, too. It's a tough break short term but in the long run both Ty and the team will benefit.
08/26/2014 - 11:51pm Cumong, Civilization Is At Stake
Neo: I'm not The One....
Oracle: Sorry, kid. You got the gift, but it looks like you're waiting for something...
Neo: What?
Oracle: Your next life maybe, who knows? That's the way these things go
Neo: [MoarOffensiveLinEus]...he, he almost had me convinced...
08/26/2014 - 7:20pm Hoke
I believe he has another year of eligibility remaining. Suit 'im up on offense once the paperwork has been completed. Maybe Brandon has a year left?
We need the mature dudes and now is not the time to be finicky.
08/26/2014 - 7:13pm Moot
Beyonce does not own Rolling Stone Magazine. If the publisher lets this one by, the next problem which surfaces may claim RSM has a policy of failing to enforce and everybody relies on this implied license. Sorry Shy, dat photo look good.
08/26/2014 - 5:56pm I've Interacted With Beyonce In Person
And can you say "poured into her perfectly-sculpted dress" three times fast? Wow, I still reel at the memory, never mind her beautiful voice and apparent business talents.
In my opinion, the Tennessee mock program violates U.S. copyright law. It's a utility, a tool, and thus not a parody nor does it otherwise present a lawful defense in law or equity based on my 20+ years in the copyright field.
Tennessee could be sued and plaintiff should win on copyright infringement provided they have standing to sue. Another wow, because this makes them look pretty stupid. I prefer Beyonce-afflication-stupid to litigation regardless.  0.02
08/25/2014 - 9:59pm It's Been Said Before
"O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning..."
-Wally "Wolverine" Whitman
08/25/2014 - 9:10pm Re Clubbing Baby Harp Seals
At this juncture, I wouldn't care that Team 135 was slated to crush zooplankton. I wanna witness a brilliant power,pass reception and aggressive offensive deception game by the Michigan athletes I spend too much time contemplating. My life is slipping by at increasing pace and so, gentlemen of Team 135, I look forward to the opportunity of Saturday worship we all know you can provide. Just play Meechigan Football already, sheesh.
08/25/2014 - 6:38pm Two Movie Paraphrases, Not One
The facepalm, wups, "napalm" reference was to Duvall's character in AN.
George C. Scott's portrayal of General Patton included a line concerning battle similar to my statement "[g]awd forgive me...."
So you received twice your money's worth here at MGoBlog. You're welcome! 
08/25/2014 - 5:50pm The Horror II and Actual Running
I scored a permit to backpack Kauai's Na'poli Coast this year. I have canceled my plans in favor of watching the game at a sports bar on the island.
Our backs are going to bust moves all day long and this human art will trump natural beauty by miles. They will renew ancient memories of Michigan backs steamrolling and trucking clusters of the opponent.
Smith and Green are both going over 100. It will be like the smell of napalm in the morning. (Patton voice) Gawd forgive me but I do love it so.
08/18/2014 - 10:16pm No. A Circular And Mundane Result Obtains.
The rapists would be humping the thieves. The murderers would be hunting the rapists and the DUIs. The DUIs would operate their vehicles under influence and run over the rapists humping the thieves as well as the stalking murderers. Meanwhile, the future banksters witnessing this all would laugh uproariously while snorting blow off their hookers' navels and hedging our futures.
08/18/2014 - 7:04pm A: Too many times.

Next question for 10k please Alex.

08/18/2014 - 6:35pm Prognastycation
MGoBlog's BlueFordSoftTop picks UM to start 13- .  Possibly over multiple seasons. All predictions subject to revision.
08/18/2014 - 5:49pm You Missed It
The announcement was posted by skywriting over the Appalachian State and Baylor stadiums (A & B:  Brandon-clever). Welcome these newest B1G team additions, smart regional outreach and complementary letters of the alphabet (Delaney-clever). Raise that move, SEC.
It's HUGE given the dimensions of skywriting you know.
08/18/2014 - 1:59pm Love At The Bog House
aka Mochogan Stadoum. Ohoo State fans do thos sort of thong on November O seem to recall.
08/15/2014 - 6:13pm Only $65
What a bargain. My dominatrix charges 3x for considerably less shame. Think I'll watch the game on TV since I'll be "tied up" at the moment. Yack.
08/12/2014 - 10:16pm Potential Effects On Victim
Tinitus, loss of motor control and sensation, oral cancers, phantom pains, mental distress, concusive effects, diminished libido, blood clots, reoccurences, hearing loss, osteoporesis - the list of potential, unpredictable effects is enormous.
This ambush has saddled a young man with lifetime impairment. The perpetrator is responsible. He must be held accountable.
08/12/2014 - 8:43pm Isn't That A Lot Of Compilation And Guesswork?
Percentage will depend on what opponents choose to scheme over the season and as it plays out. I fail to see how any meaningful prediction can be made. We will have the players and management to adjust appropriately. Says this schmuck to a 17k+ poster.
08/12/2014 - 8:30pm Our Defense
It will win games this season. We are fortunate to have Coach Mattison recruiting and developing our defensive players. I am pleased to see the time-honored aspect of my beloved Wolverines being led by this man. Grind the opponent into dust, gentlemen. Explode them.
08/12/2014 - 8:17pm The Victim


John Lavoie-Mayer, victim profile:  Remember the victim at sentencing.

08/12/2014 - 6:45pm Jail Time Mandatory
Csont'e, c'est la bye-bye. It should be green-tinged balogna sammies and mystery meat for you. Now mop that toilet area, clown, and rue the day you threw away a prosperous future.
08/11/2014 - 2:34pm Spur The Horse Too Early


And its progress towards the finish line can diminish early when otherwise it could place well. Have faith in Nuss. The line will play to finish, and the defense will win us our traditional 8 to 10 games. That is the best we can expect for this season. Happy to register more wins, of course.

08/11/2014 - 1:40pm The Big Chill For 10k Please
Relax a little already. The kinks are working themselves out. This player and that player still have time to step up. It's not uncommon for a player to reserve effort early and then once opposition has been gauged to acquire bearings and pour it on. Football is a game of attrition. These guys are smart enough to perceive the need to save a little until crunch time. Nuss should bring out the best they can give and scheme them accordingly. We'll be fine.
08/02/2014 - 6:05pm Admission Against Interest
As a former Union rugger and American feetsball player, I must say with a certain degree of relinquished disdain that the Stadium game today has been a wonderful exhibition of sport.  I hereby lift a pinky toe off Brandon's throat.  Next year I will buy tickets for a soccer rematch if offered.  Good game today.
08/01/2014 - 8:13pm Sorry I Missed The Chicago Event
And, no, I wasn't shot although some have called for this.  I have just returned from the Australian Outback, not the steak joint but the remote (no joke) desert, after doing very important things such as riding a camel at sunrise for some odd reason that escapes me. So The Brain will have to visit Chicago again and soon.  We needz the MGoBlog ppt sliedz here because obviously.
07/23/2014 - 12:44am Plenty Information On-line
You will cut yourself and the face has considerable capillaries. Prepare to deal with eventual bleeding, especially after you've let your guard down following successful shaving with a straight razor, as nicks shouldn't be life-threatening. Under the chin, below the lower lip and near the nostrils and nostril channel are the most challenging areas.
Check the grind of the blade first and foremost. This will help you find the on-line information how to strop and stone your blades. Stretch the skin and at first draw the blade with the grain of your facial hair. Grain varies surprisingly a lot depending by person's ethnicity and grid point on the face.
I use Illinois Barber strops and Japanese water stones. Brush and soap really don't matter much for me, pushing age 50 in a few years time. A younger face can be expected to require babying, don't apologize for that.
When I travel, though, the straight razor typically isn't welcome. Gillete Mach 3 and travel Barbisol shave cream container on the road. Off to Australia tomorrow, a Mach 3 in, the travel bag now.
Don't tell your mother about your intention to actually use the razors.  Unless you are willing to deal with phone calls every ten minutes for the rest of your life.
07/21/2014 - 7:12pm Damn Dude
You've been hitched to that item?!  Whaddaya eat for breakfast, 'cause that's what I'm eatin' from now on.  I am referring, of course, to the boat.  ("'Thorne"?)  Pleased to see you made safe passage.  In Hoc, Brother.
07/14/2014 - 7:13pm We Sincerely Hope So
But perhaps not. Eat plenty fruits and vegetables and pray for the best.
07/14/2014 - 6:46pm Stay Alert To Ships Traffic
Particularly at night, because you could find yourself operating then unexpectedly. The behemoths have terrible steerage. It can be disorienting when a gazillion candle power search beam illuminates your craft and your eyeballs. Trust me on this. Lots of good advice in this thread. And consider rockets for bombarding Put-in-Bay. Because that place currently reposes in Ohio and we owe it to 'em.
07/14/2014 - 6:23pm PosBang +1


Despite you posted the obvious. 

07/14/2014 - 5:38pm Statistically
I may be dead from cancer else cardiovascular event by then. So, in advance please accept now this my deferred/escrowed post-mortem cheer:  "M Go Blue!" Such is the fine legacy I leave behind for the bionics or robots playing the game for your amusement, possibly with my grafted donor parts. /s
07/11/2014 - 5:28pm Hey
You should cease with the bald and bald crown shame-isms. Your sister seems to enjoy stroking my shaved noggin whilst a'schnoggin and your mother sexts me with cootchie photos at least ten times per diem. And based on those photos I will always have swell place to store my bowling ball. (Let's not even discuss your hamster.) Weekend!
07/09/2014 - 6:56pm The Vileness and The Limits
Should I ever be bombarded with increased ad placements let alone a new foamy wolverine mascot at Michigan Stadium then I shall never visit the athletic campus again.  I can filter all that out with smart TV or just ignore Michigan athletics altogether.  Brandon has already exceeded the limits in terms of advertising and seven nation army.  He best not encroach further and Connecticut-esque. 0.02
07/09/2014 - 5:17pm Once Bitten, Twice Shy



After the fiasco constituting the hire of he who must not be mentioned, the University administration is likely to investigate candidates for leadership succession beyond all doubt. So I invite speculation who could possibly replace Dave Brandon as Athletic Director. Because I have zero notion concerning who both could and would be willing to fulfill the position.  I say this as a Brandon detractor; I simply have no ideas for superior candidates.


07/09/2014 - 5:04pm Player Health A Factor
Since we're whacking it circlesque on-line:  It's customary to attrit key players over the course of a season.  Not just out of action but limited mobility, hesitation, behavior and mental fog, too.  If fortunate with attrition abeyance, then I believe 10-2 regular season is attainable and it represents the best case, some might say fantasy, scenario.  However, we have not been fortunate since Hoke's initial season and so today I expect 8-4 or 9-3.  The schedule is light enough, and while everybody murders, everybody attrits and the other teams will suffer losses as well.  It's just we lack depth of development.  9-3 as of today.  Because.
07/08/2014 - 3:08pm Sorry Seth
I lost my dad 18 months ago under terrible circumstances.  I think about him every day.  Your father lives on through you.  I wish you and your family good luck coming to grips with this event, which you will.
07/08/2014 - 2:58pm This Guy But With Sunglasses?

07/08/2014 - 2:05pm Instant Loss of Respect
The players will stuff any coach who is wearing google glass into a locker for duration of the game.  Jocks v. Nerdz.  But sincerely, I believe something like google glass on the sidelines will happen sooner rather than later.  It's overdue at the pro level.
07/08/2014 - 1:38pm Then CPOG Is A Must-Visit For You
Chicago Pizza & Oven Grinder Co. is known for its pizza in a cup.  CPOG lines a ramekin with cheeses, dollops sauce and places the pizza crust over all.  The baked product is then brought to table resembling an over-sized muffin or mushroom.  The server wears oven mitts and uses spoons to expertly remove the ramekin from the pizza ensemble.  Presto digito - Cup O' Pizza.  I live two blocks away from CPOG and whenever the inlaws visit, like this past holiday weekend, they insist we take them there.  Just don't be put-off by the long lines, they move quickly.  Plus you have a direct view of the site where the St. Valentine's Day Massacre occurred, so photo op if you bring along your "Chicago Typewriter."
07/07/2014 - 6:28pm Five Guys Won't Cook Your Burger To Order
So, bah!, I do not patronize them.  No need for a Five Guys franchise here in Chicago.
Ideally, a burger joint will parade the cow victim before you.  At which point you slap preheated cheese, onion, pickle and a dab of ketchup on the wound caused by the prior diner.  Then you dig in, tearing your chunks from the sad beast like a locust on a cornfield. (Dare I say that I only eat meat that has been prepared rare?)
Five Guys is a non-entity, alum or not. Shame on them, possible exception their fries, those are difficult to screw up.  Five Guys should enable us rare-itans to have it our way.  Until it does, I doth protest.  Bah, Five guys.
07/02/2014 - 5:32pm That Isn't Spittle
"It's holy water," Kelly insisted to the press.  "I am the complete trinity - touchdown jesus, the eggman and the walrus; now, watch me while I levitate."  Kelly was then seen to stand on his high chair, slip and fall down, rendering him unconscious.  "There is a god," exclaimed a player who wishes to remain anonymous.
07/02/2014 - 4:27pm My Interpretation
The vid communicates there is a little person inside the Kelly caricature who bursts out and surprises you with the tiny control freak's antics.  So you leave the stage or abandon Notre Dame or something. Please don't grade me harshly, professor.
06/30/2014 - 8:12pm Replication Commences in 5-4-3-2 ...
If it pleases The Universe, let them replicate efficiently according to the way it is done in their world.  May the replicated ones control the supplicants with precision.  And may the replicated ones channel The Emperor's power through the Michigan Stadium's uprights, as is The Custom, defying both the gravity and the time-space forces exerted on Them.  The Zeta Reticulans in Columbus are now inescapably doomed.  All hail!
06/27/2014 - 8:08pm Fool
A boat is a hole in the water seeking money to fill its grid coordinates.  Trust me on this firsthand.
My desired "yacht's" inspiration once was Effluvium, check out the definition.  So, in the Michigan context, consider EffBlueVium, after Dave B.  Tremendously clever, that.  Give her a swell coat of fresh paint.  Then another.  And then another.  And then ... well the electronics are out, the motor/sails need rework, dock fees increased, somebody slipped and fell.  May gawd have mercy on your soul.
06/20/2014 - 4:41pm The Kugler Scale™
Ye who exploit the brand appeal of a student-athlete for gain and without compensating the athlete shall not be heard to complain about comparable exploitation in the future.
06/17/2014 - 10:24pm Just You Remember
Ann Arbor winters cull the weak.  It's the strong ones that survive.  Mostly.