Where is your UM Football Fandom in the 5 Stages of Grief?

Submitted by alum96 on September 20th, 2014 at 9:23 PM

Just curious where you folks stand in the 5 stages of grief right now?  Feel free to give your answer and speak your mind - its like the internet's MichiganFanAnonymous forum.

The 5 stages are:

  1. Denial
  2. Anger
  3. Bargaining
  4. Depression
  5. Acceptance

I know I have been in the small cabal of EMO (or as we call ourselves realists) peeps on the board so I viewed this staff with a more negative eye than many last year.  Like most I did pick up a little kool aid in August as we are all apt to do but the ND game (with a team down 6 players) turned me back to reality despite what the stats said.  That said I think the defense is the best part of the team despite the 31 pts given up that night...but the team did not pass the eye test to me.  It was the same as the 2013 team - when we plug one hole, another 2 spring up.

So I'd say for me, 2012 was bargaining.  I could explain away every loss - we didnt belong on the same field as Bama.  We lost to ND and OSU (#2, and #3 in the country).  Nebraska was due to Denard going down and not having a viable backup.  SC in the bowl was anyone's game - unlike VATech the prior year (where VATech looked faster and better) we looked pretty even with SC and either team could win.   All 5 losses bargained away.

Since I'm a realist at heart I dont have much depression - I sort of move quickly into acceptance from bargaining.  I will live a shorter life than many of you eternal optimists due to that per science. So that sucks.  But it helped me get thru 2013 much quicker.  I was shocked by Akron and UConn, and entered accpetance post PSU.  Wrong staff.  Even if  some good pieces on it (i.e. I'd keep Coach Heck no matter what)  Hoke is our Charlie Weiss - I said thag about 11 months to the tune of many downvotes.   So that was my acceptance. 

After tonight I still see a lot of anger out there (a bit surprising to me - we're past that no?)...some bargaining ...and some depression (not surprising) - but where are you now?  How does it compare to 3 weeks ago?  If you are holding out from acceptance what is keeping you in earlier stages?

(And no acceptance doesnt mean UM will suck for 20 years.  It means until we start over we dont have a chance to get back to a viable program. )



September 20th, 2014 at 9:45 PM ^

Definitely acceptance - a very depressed acceptance.  I'm not even depressed about the results, which are just hilarious at this point.  I'm depressed that so many people I really want to succeed are failing so miserably.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:28 PM ^


I'm holding out hope that a change in coaching staff could potentially make Michigan at least competitive. And maybe Shane Morris might enable our offense to score a touchdown. 

Perkis-Size Me

September 20th, 2014 at 9:28 PM ^

Acceptance. The 90s were a long time ago. We're a broken, broken shell of what we used to be. We're a bad team with a bad coaching staff that thinks it can still lean on its tradition to hang with the rest of the college football elite.

Sent from MGoBlog HD for iPhone & iPad


September 20th, 2014 at 9:30 PM ^

There a little known stage of grief that previously I've only known as a Lions fan, it's called, "A new low."  The ND game was a new low, this was a new low, but sadly, I think we're going to feel several new lows this season. 

I have a hard time right now finding 4 more wins on our schedule...seriously.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:46 PM ^

John...with you as a long time Lions fan.    I think watching the Lions now since early 80s as a kid helped me become cynical faster and prepared me for the current UM era.   No matter what changed (coaches, GM, players,) its the SOS...or as we call ti SOL.  Which is sort of the issue I feel now at UM - which frightens me.  But I detached from the Lions emotionally about year 4 of Millen and now it has become more of a sideshow circus to watch with amusement.

I used to tell my dad I cant imagine the people who were both Lions and Spartan fans - how dreadful their fall weekends must be.  That was when Sparty was a pererennial 5-6-7 win team for 2 decades.  Unfortunately I am now one of those people who have dreaded weekends....still love football but man it's like being a Lions fan on both Saturday and Sunday now.


September 20th, 2014 at 10:43 PM ^

I was a hard core Lions fan until they went 0-16.  That season removed all emotional attachment I had to the team and even the NFL.  Since then I watch as a curious observer and I supposed I'd jump back on the bandwagon if they had several continous years of success.  But they hollowed me out and I don't care about them

I am just about at that point with UM football.  I have no interest in going to games anymore, when they get blasted like they did today I no longer get very upset.   Getting hammered over and over just makes you numb and at some point you realize it just isn't worth it to be so emotionally attached to failure.


Tyrone Biggums

September 20th, 2014 at 9:34 PM ^

I gave up on Hoke at OSU last year (I was in attnedance at the game). The KSU game just reaffirmed my thoughts on his coaching tenure. Considering RR and what not I would say I am at acceptance. I fell back to denial and depression for moments but I am well aware that there are better days ahead of us. It really can't get worse can it?


September 20th, 2014 at 9:31 PM ^

Acceptance.  I just laugh it off now as if I'm watching a comedy. I used to let it get to me, but that just ruins what otherwise would be a perfectly good Saturday.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:31 PM ^

Acceptance.  I just laugh it off now as if I'm watching a comedy. I used to let it get to me, but that just ruins what otherwise would be a perfectly good Saturday.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:32 PM ^

This is about the lowest of the low. I didn't even feel this low after Mississippi State beat us 52-14 in the Gator Bowl.
We're literally only in game 4 and this team is arguably about as worse as the 2008 team in Rich Rod's first year.

There is not a chance there's 100k for next week's game. I won't be there anyway. Got a wedding and I'm actually looking forward to the wedding since I won't have to watch the game.


Victor Valiant

September 20th, 2014 at 9:33 PM ^

I was at anger before the game because I truly believed we were going to lose. I went to depression once I realized I was right in the 4th quarter. I'm at acceptance now. Hoke needs to be fired. I've accepted that he's lost the locker room and this season is a lost cause. At this point I just wanna see the younger players develop and get ready for next season any way they can.


September 20th, 2014 at 10:37 PM ^

Dear person,

Please review our basketball program to see that VERY GOOD coaching combined with QUITE GOOD recruiting is a very good combination to have.   It supersedes GREAT recruiting with AVERAGE coaching; our current state in football.

UM's worst class of recruiting is better than MSU, Stanford Wisconsin or Kansas State's.   If you would not trade one class being ranked #27 instead of #9 in return for changing to a top end* coaching staff you really havent followed the world of football.  Its not the old world where you can stockpile talent and roll it out like the 70s - you have to actually develop talent nowadays.

Of course this assumes we can identify a top end coaching staff.  That is a fail lately

But if you delivered me Harbaugh tomorrow or simialr fascimile (sp?!) with the promise of the next 4 years classes being ranked at MSU and Wisconsin level WAY down at 30 I'd say YES!  And we'd never have that situation because UM nearly sells itself - at most we'd have 1 year where we get recruits like wow Stanford then return to our normal top 10.  How could we ever survive?


September 20th, 2014 at 11:32 PM ^

The talent is there, the development, mostly on offense, is not.  And playing defense in the absence of any hope of wining, well it becomes hopeless, So a benign, absent, and at times pathetic offense, can make a great defense look average (today for instance). Nuss deserves time, but damn Hoke where have you been?



Maize and Blue…

September 20th, 2014 at 9:33 PM ^

I'm glad my work schedule is getting changed so I don't have to watch this crap anymore this season.  Tried to get in as many games before the change, but after the last three weeks I'm not wasting any money next week though I'm pretty sure they will be giving them away.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:33 PM ^

I've been at acceptance since the start of 2012. It is what it is at this point. This University made a money hire in DB in terms of making money and he in turn hired a yes man to run the football program. It is what it is.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:33 PM ^

"you have to be stupid. That's what optimistic means you know? It means stupid. An optimist is somebody who goes "Hey, maybe something nice will happen." Why the fuck would anything nice happen?"
-Louis C.K.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:33 PM ^


Hoke yelled at Mattison for celebrating a player.

The "ultimate player's coach" fell into bad spirits because of a penalty that didn't even erase the wonderful play of Frank Clark. It's not about the players anymore. It's about him, and it's about keeping his job.

I feel especially grim thinking about how that man has always championed his players, and in the heat of the moment he turned on his chief coordinator--the one doing a comparatively fine job--for celebrating a player.

In that single moment, the entire spirit of Brady Hoke's tenure at Michigan ended.

Dilithium Wings

September 20th, 2014 at 9:35 PM ^

Acceptance. We clearly suck. This offense is way too incompetent to make a massive improvement to save this season. Hoke has shown he's over his head.

Anyone who can stand by Hoke and defend him as a leader of this program is in utter denial and you need to go fuck yourself.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:36 PM ^

Where coaches go to SUCK!!!

Also, I live in central ohio and my wife just won tickets to "the game" (I want to jump off a fucking cliff)

Also, I hate everyone!!!



September 20th, 2014 at 9:36 PM ^

Take stock right now, the worst thing that could happen to us is for Hoke to win 6 out of the last 8 against a pathetic Big 10 ans save his job.  We need wholesale change.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:36 PM ^

Take stock right now, the worst thing that could happen to us is for Hoke to win 6 out of the last 8 against a pathetic Big 10 ans save his job.  We need wholesale change.


September 20th, 2014 at 9:36 PM ^

The very last play for Michigan's offense seems to sum up the game. Shane Morris tries to dump off a 3-yard pass to Hayes on a 4th and 10 from their own 2, which Justice fittingly drops it. That's my new definition of depressing. Onto this mound of homework.