The State Of Our Open Threads: Halfway Report

Submitted by LSAClassOf2000 on October 13th, 2013 at 8:30 AM

I thought about making this a diary, but it should likely be a thread so more will see it.

As some are aware, I do collect data on a few major swearing metric in the open threads for our games, and I believe it is time to report out on the state of MGoSchadenfreude now that we are halfway through the regular season.

The major metrics are - "fuck", "shit", damn", "ass", "suck" and "fire", the last being references to firing coaches, which isn't cussing but is often done in conjuction with it. We also track references to putting Shane Morris in the game, but this will be reported on separately. 

In the major metrics, at this point in the season, we have accumulated 1,956 instances of all of these, not counting 69 total calls throughout the season to put Shane Morris in the game. It is interesting to note that 36 of those came last night, and when he was incidentally inserted in the game due to Gardner losing his helmet, there was no obvious jubilation (possibly because it was only one play).

In any case, here is the distribution:

Here are the summary cumulative statistics:

  TOTAL AVERAGE STD. DEV.
"fuck" 1005 167.50 187.53
"shit" 227 37.83 24.19
"damn" 227 37.83 56.03
"fire" 76 12.67 13.07
"suck" 281 46.83 38.31
"ass" 140 23.33 29.14
"put in Morris" 69 11.50 14.09

Clearly, as a community, we rely too much on "fuck" and thus have a very unbalanced cussing game. It seems clear that if we try to be a little moe profane up front, we can open up holes to get more swearing through. Here is the general trend for each metric:

Going back to "put in Morris", this only shows up in three game - Akron, UConn and Penn State. In the Akron and UConn games, there were a combined 33 references to the prospect of starting a freshman over Gardner. Last night, there were 36 references. 

Later on in the season, this will get more detailed - I will try to provide additional dimensions to the data, including parts of speech analysis and a Pareto chart which details the most common gripes of the blog. 

Comments

umfan323

October 13th, 2013 at 9:08 AM ^

of the problem but since  Funk have been here we have had a terrible O line ..Yet we have consistently gotten 4* Olineman during that time, now when you have very good lineman and the line is still the main problem I have to look at who is coaching that line..Wisconsin gets 2* and 3* lineman but yet dominate and we cant with 4 and 5 *

LongLiveBo

October 13th, 2013 at 8:53 AM ^

Damn it! We need to fucking fire Borges! The man simply sucks ass. And while we are at how about we put Shane in the game and see what he can do. I am sick of this shit.

mgowill

October 13th, 2013 at 8:52 AM ^

If I had the time I would collect data based on occurrence versus game time. I'm sure you would see large "fuck" spikes on an interception, general grumbling that slowly diminishes after a spike, and a fairly predictable chart. It would be kind of cool to see how many occurrences per minute and then relate them back to in game plays. Ex: Gibbons missed FG resulted in 27.3 vulgar references per minute.

Vote_Crisler_1937

October 13th, 2013 at 9:33 AM ^

The most intelligently profane fans in sports is a great idea. On a personal note, my GF and I sometimes yell and curse about different things during a game. I should make note of it and look at the prob. chart and see who is more correct in complaining or not complaining about certain plays.

UMMAN83

October 13th, 2013 at 9:25 AM ^

brick wall over and ever and over and over and over and ...  We can get through guys ... lets do it again and again and again and again ...  What a tool.  Hoke is a probelm also for letting this continue. 

Giff4484

October 13th, 2013 at 9:26 AM ^

Last night was a total fail by our team. Our defense last night was terrible, 80 yards in 20 seconds? Woof.  Gibbons... late hits etc. Al Borges and Funk have failed but so has Hoke and G Matt. I get that the teams we play game plan and will make plays etc no matter what the talent level but considering how we have played against Akron, Uconn and now a crippled PSU this is very bad.  My problem is we are in year 3 and we look worse than year 1 under Hoke. Not a good sign with so called better talent.

WolverineInCbus

October 13th, 2013 at 10:00 AM ^

I don't think the defense was that bad last night. The only times they scored touchdowns (for the most part) were when Devin gave them a really short field cuz of a pick. The last drive that we allowed them to tie can be 100% contributed to Channing stribling and Brady hoke. Why on gods green earth are you putting a true freshman on an all big ten receiver? Nonetheless, stribling mistimed both of those long throws and they both should've been interceptions. So I think it's harsh to blame the whole defense for that last drive

Michigan Arrogance

October 13th, 2013 at 9:41 AM ^

soooo, I was at the RIT-M hockey game last night. I assume losing to a 61-s'ship team with no defense, no offense and a True Freshman QB in 4 OTs was EXACTLY how it sounds, eh?

what's the consensus: are we blaming Borges for what I have to assume are 5+/- 2 hilarious TOs, or Mattison for giving up 34 regulation points to PSU, or Hoke for basically everything under the sun?

An Angelo's Addict

October 13th, 2013 at 10:43 AM ^

Hey LSA, is there any way for you to analyze the swearing metric in the liveblog? Or only in the open threads? I would enjoy seeing the cussing frequency in the liveblog, especially with the multitudes of comments that don't get posted