Elmer

May 26th, 2012 at 11:47 PM ^

Almost seemed like a prank.  I half expected Ashton Kutcher to walk out onto the field and tell the crowd they were punked.  She doesn't have a bad voice, but it was like she was missing notes intentionally.

bjk

May 27th, 2012 at 1:35 AM ^

If a right note is surrounded by wrong notes on every side, then it will sound wrong also.

A note can only sound right relative to its neighbors, ie, the neighboring notes need be right for the pitch relationships to sound right.

Or, to put it another way, if you had perfect pitch, you might find that she DID hit ONE correctly, but that only someone who knows A=440 hz when they hear it would have any way to know without other correct notes for reference.

PurpleStuff

May 26th, 2012 at 10:33 PM ^

They compared her voice favorably with that of the star of the film "The Hills Have Eyes". 

"Flower of Scotland" was also murdered by that shitty five-piece pipe band that looked like they met in the parking lot.

BlueMan80

May 26th, 2012 at 10:51 PM ^

When the topic is singing that I can honestly say, "Hey, I can do that!". However, I usually torture just a few people near me during the anthem. Then there was the guy next to me at a Go-Gos concert at Ravinia last summer that truly tortured me...

MGoBender

May 26th, 2012 at 10:53 PM ^

I mean, it was terrible.  But I was seriously expected some comedy.  If you're gonna say "Worst Anthem Ever," it's gotta beat this:

 

Gulogulo37

May 27th, 2012 at 12:04 AM ^

At first, I figured that girl was just some actor or whatever, but it turns out she's actually supposed to be a professional singer! WHAT?!? Surely there are other attractive women who can sing better than her. Roseanne is Roseanne. That's about what I'd expect from her, but this...

MgoSuh

May 26th, 2012 at 10:54 PM ^

Just to wash everyone's ears clean of that absolute atrocity...here's my favorite version of the Anthem ever performed. Say what you will about Whitney Houston...but this performance gives me the chills EVERY time.

 

 

PIJER

May 27th, 2012 at 1:39 AM ^

From my understanding the NFL requested that she pre- record this version in the event that something unforseeable took place. However, she still sang that version from what i was told in one take. It wasn't done over and over and chopped and corrected.

MGoBender

May 27th, 2012 at 8:02 AM ^

Yes, this.  If I remember correctly it was not chopped and made perfect.  But it was still a recording.

I think it was on Drew and Mike that I heard about it.

MMB 82

May 27th, 2012 at 11:53 AM ^

But it was still her voice; and if you look carefully, even though she was lip syncing (or more likely, singing into the microphone but having her voice replaced in the audio feed by the recording) she completely NAILS it, right down to the vibrato gestures. Legend has it that recording engineers had difficulty "doubling" her voice because her singing was so precise that it would sound too identical to the prior take.

Tater

May 26th, 2012 at 11:06 PM ^

I think she was just softening up the crowd for that game, sometime in the future, when Skrillex does the National Anthem.  It will sound great in comparison.

BlockM

May 26th, 2012 at 11:24 PM ^

Ooooooooooh SAY (wub wub wub) CAN (wub wub wub) YOU (wub wub wub wub wub) SEE WUBUBUBUBUBWUBZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZCHKCHKCHKWUBBBBBBB!

I'd listen to it. The whole point of America is that we have the freedom to do things like that.

Feat of Clay

May 27th, 2012 at 5:52 AM ^

I am told that every year the School of Music, Theatre & Dance has people show up at auditions having had glowing recommendations about their ability--and they are dreadful. Vocal, instrumental, the gamut. It's not just nerves, they really are not proficient, but no one has ever told them.

CarrIsMyHomeboy

May 26th, 2012 at 11:52 PM ^

Having just graduated from medical school, I ought to know whether or not "tone deaf" is a colloquialism, dysphemism, or, like, a real actual thing. But I don't. Regardless that, I listened to the rendition. And while I didn't find it especially good, I thought it was decent or average. Not average as in the middle-spot among celebrity singers, but average as in this would be the result if one of the better voices in an average family sung the anthem. If I had a girlfriend and she sung the anthem like that, I would still totally have congratulatory sex with her afterward.

bjk

May 27th, 2012 at 1:23 AM ^

is the flip side of the concept of "talent." Most people, for various reasons, chose to mystify and mythologize "talent," which is another word for "ability," which, in music, is usually a combination of aptitude and devoted, persistent, diligent toil.

Those who fail to achieve at the highest level prefer to think of the outcome as the result of disparities in some recondite, mystically bestowed "gift"; and from the time of Paganini, audiences looking for a good show prefer to think that they are witnessing some freakish abberation in the natural order of things rather than the outcome of painstaking devotion.

You may not be tone deaf, merely forgiving. And being "forgiving" and "congratulatory" with a girlfriend is hardly to be faulted, especially if she has breasts like Victoria Zarlenga.

But it wasn't very good music.

a2bluefan

May 27th, 2012 at 12:01 AM ^

That was bad, but there are many more that are way worse. Christina Aguilera at the 2011 Super Bowl comes to mind, and I'm not even talking about the missed lyrics.

bjk

May 27th, 2012 at 1:01 AM ^

Actually, FSK had nothing to do with the music.

The traduced composers were members of the Anacreontic Society, possibly headed up by John Stafford Smith.

Here is an instrumentally accompanied rendition of the original opus; the singer isn't terribly preoccupied with consonants, but the lyrics from the YouTube description are below:

To Anacreon in Heav'n, where he sat in full glee,
A few sons of harmony sent in a petition
That he their Inspirer and patron would be;
When this answer arriv'd from the Jolly Old Grecian "Voice, fiddle and flute, "no longer be mute,
"I'll lend you my name and inspire you to boot,
"And, besides, I'll instruct you, like me, to intwine
"The Myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's Vine."

(...)

Ye Sons of Anacreon, then join hand in hand;
Preserve unanimity, friendship and love!
'Tis yours to support what's so happily plann'd;
You've the sanction of Gods and the fiat of Jove. While thus we agree Our toast let it be:
"May our club flourish happy, united and free!
"And long may the sons of Anacreon intwine
"The Myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's Vine."

stetgor

May 27th, 2012 at 1:36 AM ^

Ok, to be honest, I only listened to 15 seconds so I'm not sure how bad the whole thing was.  I literally couldn't subject myself to listening to any more.  One big UGHHHH!

JamieH

May 27th, 2012 at 1:48 AM ^

Those of you saying that wasn't so bad need your ears checked.  That was beyond awful.  I'm not sure she hit a single right note in the entire song. 

If that woman thinks she is a a professional singer, she needs a new line of work, like starting tuesday morning.  Because she might just be the worst professional singer in history.  Most moderately talented amatures sound better than that.  Hell, most karoke singers at a bar sound better than that.

EDIT:   It is possible that her earpiece was malfunctioning, causing her to not hear herself properly and therefore not be able to sing the proper notes.  Normally I wouldn't say that wasn't likely,  but it is really really hard to suck as bad as she did if you have functioning ears.  Even most untalented singers can at least hit SOME right notes. 

Swazi

May 27th, 2012 at 4:34 AM ^

That wasn't anything CLOSE to the worst rendition of the anthem. This isn't even sniffing the top ten or twenty. Carl Lewis? Rosanne? Christina Agulera? All FAR worst than this.

LSAClassOf2000

May 27th, 2012 at 9:18 AM ^

...and at the end,  the only question that came to mind was, "Would Jamie Farr or Jaye P. Morgan have waited the  minimum 45 seconds before gonging this act?" 

I don't think that I could have - I would have much preferred the surprise appearance of Gene Gene The Dancing Machine singing the National Anthem to this. Having said this, I will admit that this is not the worst rendition I have ever heard, but just to contrast this with a surprisingly decent performance from someone you  may not expect, here's Bob Saget (not the best ever, but certainly not terrible) - 

 

Smash Lampjaw

May 27th, 2012 at 8:37 AM ^

...than I could sing it. Surround her with a band and she is right in there with some rockers we have argued about on this here blog. About as pitchy as Phillip Phillips.