OT: Talking Cars Tuesday - Embarrassment Edition

Submitted by JeepinBen on April 26th, 2016 at 10:01 AM

We've talked summer, we've talked biggest/smallest/etc. we even heard that half of you should be dead based on the "dumbest" things you've done with cars. How about most embarrassing? Did your car break down on the first date? Did you have a "LeCar" and all your friends called you "LeGeorge"?

Did you accidentally buy the F-Series?

No shame here, just funny stories among friends. What's the most embarrassed you've ever been by your ride?


Everyone Murders

April 26th, 2016 at 10:09 AM ^

My father had a 67 Corvette Convertible and asked me to clean it while he was out for the afternoon.  I liked that sort of mindless work, so I detailed it.  Being in my teens, with keys to the car, I decided I owed it to myself to take it out for a spin.

I drove it through the neighborhood, and sure enough managed to flood it out.  My father was going to be home fairly soon, and I had his car a few blocks away and could not start it for the life of me.  My father was not the understanding sort, and things were not going to go well if I had to confess that I took his car for a joy ride.

So I went to a neighbor's house (did not know him), and explained my plight.  Once he was done laughing at me he explained how to start a flooded car with a carburator.  I got the car back into the garage, cleaned the urine off the driver's seat, and all was well.

But damned if I didn't feel the fool.

(I love the picture in the OP - when Homer denies that he's driving a soccer mom's car, Lenny points out that instead of a cigarette lighter it has a lipstick.)


April 26th, 2016 at 1:01 PM ^

The first time I'm driving home from a late shift at NUBS. I cruise down this dirt road in bright on and see two headlights, one on top of the other. 'Thats odd...' I get closer and found out some young man has put the car on its passenger side door. He and his GF were standing next to it. "Dude! Can you help me turn it over?" I opted not to, not knowing if it might roll back on us if we tried. I did drive him home though.


The second time I was driving with my wife in our XJ. We see two boys on the long road into her HS, and they flag us down. "Dude! You have a tow strap!?" "yes, sure, why?" "We need a tow out of the weeds.

It was a clear, dry day, so my wife, their teacher, starts asking what happens. They were kind of cagey. 

So after I pull them out, I started to figure it out. They'd said they'd stalled, and this road was a long, straight downhill with a curve at the end. "Did you boys try to roll start it?"

"Um, yeah...."

"Do you realize its an automatic?"

"We thought it would work." 

They put it in neutral, rolled it down the hill, and before the curve dropped it into drive. Front wheels locked I guess and they swerved into the ditch. 

When we got them out, one of the boys asked if he could use my phone. While he was on the phone I noticed he mentioned nothing about going into the ditch. After he hung up I pointed out he had weeds stuck in the grill and front wheel wells, and helped them yank them out just before his Dad pulled up in his truck. 


April 26th, 2016 at 10:12 AM ^

Pretty cool car, spare all the rust I had on it.  Back passenger side trim piece was so rusted, had to drill a screw into it to get it to stop hanging down. 

Same car, got the gas pedal stuck under the floor mat and hit the rev limiter and the engine shut off.  Had to pull into someone's driveway (random person, random road) and these two guys came up asking me what was the matter.  Had to explain what happened, got some weird looks but then finally got her going again and went on my merry way.


April 26th, 2016 at 10:14 AM ^

My then girlfriend of a few months (now wife) agreed to go offroading with me for the day out at the Mounds (about an hour from Ann Arbor). It had been a wet weekend, but we went anyway and were quite excited. The guy working the gate said "Just don't get stuck". Well, we were having a super fun day:

When I found an ATV trail by mistake.

And I got the Jeep good and stuck:

Luckily, the friend we went with drove off after 3 (!!!) hours of trying to unstuck me and found some other, bigger jeeps to get me out. The moral of the story? Always offroad with at least 3 total vehicles (That way 2 can pull on the 1 stuck one, there were only 2 of us, so we were screwed until we found more help). Also, if a woman agrees to date you after something like this? Marry her.


April 26th, 2016 at 2:12 PM ^

30+ yrs ago up in the mountains out west when 4-wheeling was a fairly new deal, and me owning a 4wd was somewhat 'unique'.   he told me 'i don't understand why people put their winches on the front.   its where they're going that's got them stuck.  they need to put them on the back so they can drag themselves out of trouble'.  never seen one like that, but there is more than a grain of truth to that comment. 


April 27th, 2016 at 12:21 AM ^

I knew a crazy bastard that got his 4wd truck stuck all the time.  He had a come along that got a lot of use. He'd put his feet on the bumper and lever between his knees and he could pull that truck out of just about anything as long as there was a sturdy tree within 25 feet.


April 26th, 2016 at 10:14 AM ^

First car in high school, a '96 Chrysler Sebring that was a purple "wild berry" color my grandma had passed down to me, was stuck in first gear. This caused me to get absurdly poor gas mileage, and my parents refused to pay to fix the car since it was already on its last leg and so old (I drove this in 2011). Like I said, I got terrible gas mileage, 15 miles per gallon maybe, and one day a cute girl I had a crush on asked if I could give her a ride to school. I of course said yes, and excitedly drove to her house that morning, only to realize I hadn't filled my gas tank the night before and was getting low.
Nonetheless, I was confident I had enough to get us to school and back, and we headed on our way. As we neared the school, two students had gotten in a accident prior and had caused a massive traffic backup that caused us to sit there idly in the car for about half a hour ( I went to a high school of 2600 and the school was on a two lane road, traffic stunk). Long story short, my car engulfed the remaining gas I had in the tank from running so long. We were already going to be late due to the accident, and I made us even later by having to literally run down the road about a mile to buy us a gallon of gas in a canister to get us to school in time. Never was asked for a ride by her again!

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April 26th, 2016 at 10:46 AM ^

Yeah, I wasn't able to take it much faster than that, fortunately I only had it a year or so and it only had to be used solely for driving around my town. The RPMs on it were insane when I'd get some speed going though. A minor fender bender a year later and insurance wouldn't cover me on a car that old, and basically gave me 1000 dollars and told me to get a new car haha

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April 26th, 2016 at 12:51 PM ^

my dad's AMC Pacer, a white goldfish bowl on wheels, with a three speed stick. Piece of shit. He kept glorifying the excellent visibility, which of course meant everyone, everyone could see me behind the wheel. Kind of embarrassing, but worth it when heading to the high school GF's house to play.

Powderd Toast

April 26th, 2016 at 10:23 AM ^

First car was an 89 Baretta. I "financed" it through my parents. The day after I paid it off I was coming home from work and decided to take the long way. Hit a turn going 40ish and the rear end kicked out. I did a 540 into a tree that was 5 feet in diameter landing squarely on the dirvers side door. Then bounced off into another 180. I was all good until i got out and they guy who's yard I was in asked me in a panic if I was ok. I shrugged it off and saif yeah. He said, "well your car's not." I look over anf the rear driver's side wheel snapped clean off and was propping up the car. I called my dad to come get me and sufered the awkward 10 miniute drive home.

The plus side is I fixed the car myself and slod it a year later for more than what I had into it.


April 26th, 2016 at 10:27 AM ^

My new wife and I are driving from Butler county PA to the Pittsburgh airport after our wedding reception to check in to the hotel there the night before our plane leaves for St. Maarten the next morning. 

We're on 28 south when I notice I forgot to get gas.  We head into the north side to get gas and we run out of gas.

We walked to a gas station a block away seeing some shady-lookin' folks along the way.

Yes, my friends had tied cans on strings to the back of my car (and 'Just Married' was written on the rear windshield) and 2 cars honked as I was putting gas in the car.

It was our wedding night and I had no reason to run out of gas in order to facilitate getting some that night.



April 26th, 2016 at 10:29 AM ^

I had a 92 Saturn coupe.  Fun first car, it was a manual.

However, in the waning moments of summer one year, my sunroof got stuck open.  Couldn't figure out why, and didn't have the money to just buy a new one.  Took me awhile to get it fixed.  In the meantime, I had to duct tape a plastic bag to the roof to make sure it did not get soaked.  That, uh, did not look cool.  And it did not hold heat very well.

I also managed to lock my keys in my car a few times during this period.  Had to cut the bag and climb into the car from the sunroof to get them out.  I am a moron.


April 26th, 2016 at 10:37 AM ^

I was driving home yesterday, and I saw a Toyota Echo, that well known beastly speed demon with all of 108 horsepower, with a bolt on spoiler. I nearly crashed my car from laughing.


April 26th, 2016 at 10:52 AM ^

I went to HS with a kid who would tell people he drove a "vette. . .  a chevette". He thought it was hilarious. He also had the back end lifted like a muscle car for good measure. He still had a mullet way after they went out of style too. Thinking back, I'm pretty sure I went to HS with Joe Dirt.

The Mad Hatter

April 26th, 2016 at 10:38 AM ^

I bought a beautiful '98 XJ8.  It had high miles but it looked beautiful and ran well.  For a while.

It died on me one night at around 2am.  In the middle of a jam packed Detroit / Windsor tunnel.  Luckily a tow truck showed up eventually and gave me a jump.  I limped home (headlights not working and trans stuck in 3rd gear) eventually and then paid the dealer like $600 to find a single bad electrical connection.

I sold that car a few years later after putting way more $ into it than I paid for it originally.