OT: NCAA Tourney & Vasectomies
I am at a point now in my life where most of my buddies are done having kids and most of them are either considering or have had a vasectomy. For those of you that are unfamiliar with the procedure, the process is outpatient, usually lasting less than an hour. Afterwards, you are instructed to take it easy for a few days, particularly the first couple of days. Contemplating this, I was thinking about timing when it occurred to me that if I was going to have a vasectomy done, I should do it on the first day of the NCAA tournament. That way, should I be confined to the lazyboy holding a packet of frozen peas to my boys, there would be a constant source of entertainment during the down time. On the positive side, I would be watching the games anyway and now I have a reason to put off the honey-do lists or any other distraction’s that can cloud the enjoyment of watching March Madness. Not to mention, having my wife cater to me.
Outside of March Madness and maybe the Masters, what other weekends would you want to be able to be confined to your lazyboy with the TV on?
March 18th, 2010 at 10:24 AM ^
The olympics, if they were on.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:24 AM ^
I had this done last fall. I'd say it's a pain in the ass, but that's the wrong part. Have it done on Wednesday and then take the weekend off - beer, Vicodin and sammiches!
March 18th, 2010 at 10:24 AM ^
New Year's Day?
March 18th, 2010 at 10:25 AM ^
I used to say the NFL draft, but they changed it. Used to be, a full Saturday and Sunday watching the draft with a six-pack was a pretty nice way to spend a weekend.
Otherwise? Any ol' weekend in September, October, or November sounds good.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:26 AM ^
God bless you, but no knife will ever go anywhere near my penis....not again anyway.
Can you just pretend you did it and be confined to your lazyboy?
I'd say every Michigan football Saturday I like to be confined to myself. That and if there's a good show that I have 4 seasons of on DVD.
EDIT: WORLD CUP! I love watching all the games... so much passion.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:30 AM ^
Story!
March 18th, 2010 at 10:50 AM ^
Ha, unfortunately I was referring to a standard procedure most baby boys go through. Except I was like 5. Late bloomer, I reckon.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:18 AM ^
Since I was like a baby when it happened and thus have no recollection or say in the matter.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:26 AM ^
My parents wanted to give me the option...a choice. I was also baptized the same day. I always thought the two should go together.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:33 AM ^
But then you also have to leave your wife when she ends up pregnant if you want to keep up the lie.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:51 AM ^
That is awful but funny at the same time. I'm not married yet, but I'll keep that in mind when I do.
March 18th, 2010 at 12:52 PM ^
pretend you got a vasectomy. Once she gets pregnant and all after thinkin she's safe.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:26 AM ^
Cowherd listener are we?
March 18th, 2010 at 11:33 AM ^
ShiftMX6 - No, can't listen to that guy - he makes my head hurt. Based on your reference, I am assuming he is pitching the same idea? Never said I came up with it, but did not take it from Cowler, that's for sure.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:40 AM ^
The guys on the belt next to me at work listen to him, and he was talking about that same idea. I'm with you, I can't stand the guy.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:30 AM ^
are on the second day after.
It might be painful enough that you and your drugs just want to sleep.
Also heavy painkiller + beer = no no
March 18th, 2010 at 10:51 AM ^
"Also heavy painkiller + beer = no no"
I lethargically disagree.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:35 AM ^
I kid you not. This has been an advertisement on Chicago Sports Radio for well over a month. I assume you have heard it, otherwise, you, sir, are their target audience.
"Looking for the perfect excuse to stay home and watch the first couple days of the tournament guilt-free, Come in and GET A VASECTOMY!"
March 18th, 2010 at 10:52 AM ^
it has been advertised on the radio in toledo as well, they are calling the event "snip city"
March 18th, 2010 at 11:38 AM ^
I live in Dallas - so it's a coincidence.
I'm not sure how I feel about a Urologist advertising on the radio...
March 18th, 2010 at 10:43 AM ^
Wow, this is an absolutely brilliant idea. I'm only 26 so this probably isn't happening yet, but this actually made me look forward to getting it done.
Also, the World Cup's first week would be pretty sweet.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:48 AM ^
some loose ends.
*Had to look up how to spell. THAT hungover.
March 18th, 2010 at 10:56 AM ^
We don't shoot blanks around here.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:03 AM ^
stiff competition for the rest of them.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:05 AM ^
We don't want to be the cock of the walk.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:09 AM ^
sack the competition.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:10 AM ^
We certainly don't want to shrink away from it.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:13 AM ^
the harder the better.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:16 AM ^
Things could get a little hairy.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:20 AM ^
something easier?
(Nice one, btw.)
March 18th, 2010 at 11:22 AM ^
It's nothing I can't handle.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:27 AM ^
to have a stroke.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:29 AM ^
Get a room
March 18th, 2010 at 11:34 AM ^
Sit back with us. Take a load off.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:39 AM ^
You'll shoot your eye out kid!
March 18th, 2010 at 11:44 AM ^
to always keep your weapon safe.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:39 AM ^
bent out of shape.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:43 AM ^
leads to arterial hardening. That can put you in a hole quickly.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:44 AM ^
the thrust of my argument.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:48 AM ^
has climaxed quickly.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:50 AM ^
ride.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:52 AM ^
do it again soon.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:56 AM ^
times.
March 18th, 2010 at 12:01 PM ^
she said?
March 18th, 2010 at 11:20 AM ^
Or shut up!
March 18th, 2010 at 11:00 AM ^
This was a story on the local news last night. March is the most popular month to get it done.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:10 AM ^
Friday was video games (and your basic gimping, whining, and fussing over by a wife who was feeling guilty), and Saturday was Michigan Football. The point of those other activities is distraction. No reason to get it done on Wednesday unless you simply want all the time off - by Saturday you'll be feeling ok.
NCAA tourney would be a great time, better personally for me than a football Saturday, as the distraction is more sustained. Also a Michigan loss would kind of ruin the rest of the day. I'm sure some poor sucker had it done the Friday before Appy State. Talk about a rough weekend.....
March 18th, 2010 at 11:18 AM ^
A few things you need to keep in mind:
1. The procedure itself lasts less than 30 minutes. I was in and out of the doc's office in under 45 minutes. There are no scalpels or sutures involved anymore.
2. Its mostly painless. The worst part is getting the shots of lidocaine. Once that's done, you don't feel a thing, and if you do, they keep shooting up the lidocaine until you don't.
3. Believe the doc when he says to take it easy for at least 2 days. I went to a business lunch the following day -- not a good idea.
4. Your wife, if she's anything like mine, won't have much sympathy for you. Don't count on the "sammiches", or being endlessly catered to while you recuperate.
5. Your wife may, however, if you ask real nice, help with the collection of the "samples" a few weeks after the procedure.
6. If the "little swimmers" are dead or not present after 6-8 weeks, you're good. Otherwise, they'll have to do it again.
Frankly, there is much more pain, and a messier, longer recovery involved in getting a tooth pulled. If someone told me I could choose between the two, I'd do the vas again over a tooth extraction.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:19 AM ^
...or just relive the glory of the previous thread on this topic.
March 18th, 2010 at 11:44 AM ^
The best part is once you take the bullets out of your gun you can point it at anyone and they don’t even care.