META/OT/SIAP: Merry Half-Festivus - I've got a lot of problems with you people
As the bleak, stark expanse of the offseason drags out before us, a cabin fever of sorts has set in, and cracks in the facade of our collective sanity have begun to expose themselves. We've seen a lot of back-and-forth about OT rules and points and cool stories, bro. These squabbles are merely symptoms of the greater conflicts that simmer just beneath the surface.
In that spirit, I declare today to be the FIRST ANNUAL FESTIVUS IN JUNE CELEBRATION. We shall now commence with the airing of the grievances. I will begin.
- Pope Gregory XIII - May was too long. June is currently too long. July is not looking promising. If his Gregorian Calendar was better constructed, we wouldn't be in this mess.
- Ghosts - I feel haunted by the ghosts of a number of coaches from the past. They are less cordial than I was anticipating.
- People who declare things to the the "First Annual" - At this point, it's just "the first." You need two points to create a line. One point is simply "shit that happened today."
- Tyler Ecker - PITCH THE GODDAMN BALL TO BREASTON
- Henri - Enough with the ennui. We get it.
Thus begins my list. There shall be more. Your turn.
COMMENCE CATHARSIS
NOW IS THE TIME FOR THE AIRING OF GRIEVANCES!
You couldn't smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot date with a babe...
I lost my train of thought.
I hate every fucking one of you. And those who are not fucking as well. If you do not like this I will meet you at The Pole for Feats of Strength.
I also despise the use of the word "awesome". It is a term applicable perhaps once or twice in the life of a human. The only thing that is awesome is how badly this term is used.
Now piss off!
Your avatar is the Lannister symbol, although your background color is different.
Here's a grievance: the point system the NHL uses encourages teams to play for shootouts, which aren't really hockey. You get 3 if you win, 1 if you lose. Teams should get just 2 points for a shootout win.
A team that wins a shootout gets 2 points
The point still stands, though. If a shootout win counts just as much as a regular win but a shootout loss counts more than a regular loss, teams have an incentive to play for shootouts. If they're going to keep shootouts the scheme should be 3 points for a regular win, 2 for a shootout win, 1 for a shootout loss, 0 for a regular loss.
You people need real hobbies that don't involve words like "catharsis".
I have no problem with the word "catharsis." It's better than "catheter."
I am convinced that no one actually knows what catheter means.
I had a Foley when I had surgery last year, so I definitely know full well what a catheter is. And I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
Yeah...I miss the pictures of your various girlfriends, too.
What is this "IMG Academy?" Some kind of charter school just for athletes? How is that fair to the public school across the street that's just trying to field a team from the neighborhood population? They don't even have Detroit in Florida.
I don't care if they shipped him off to a farm, give me moar!
BE-IN SPORTS.
Damn those terrorists with their budget!
/shakes.fist.at.FIFA.television.rights.rules
I'm offended by this holiday. This should be removed and not allowed posted here due to this.
Do we hold the Feats of Strength at Half-Festivus?
and the winner gets this:
Nice hat in principle, but we need to get it in blue....or maize.....but preferably blue.
I'll see what I can do...
things went to hell around here when we lost that.
I liked the pos-bang. I have seen numerous posts here that were so funny they would have been in triple digits, but the most they could get was five points.
The current setup is a weird form of paternalistic socialism, and the law of unintended consequences reared its ugly head. Nobody can get too high or too low on an individual post, and so all it did was encourage the trolls and the numbskulls.
Amen brother. It would seem the only people who dont think so are the leaders of the site itself. And the promise to restore during the off-season seems to be dwindling.
I got tired of the current regime when they constantly panned all the diaries I contributed to or helped germinate but I still come back for the content. Since they don't give a damn for my thoughts, I refuse to click on any ads, buy any useless crap, or donate one penny to support the site.
But I think you contribute a miniscule amount just by creating pageviews.
The incentives have been removed to generate free content (i.e. faster access to points). I don't feel motivated to put more effort into my posts or generate diaries when the paid staffers don't notice or don't care and I don't get a point bump either. If I incidentally generate more pageviews, fine, but that's all I can offer.
Someone's a little full of themselves....and it's not the paid staffers.
You may want to think about a new brand of catheter sir.
You may want to write diaries about anything other than tennis.
But since you asked so politely, here you go:
Pearls before swine? Yes, the reason I can't tolerate your posts is because I lack the cultured upbringing required to understand the nuances of the game of tennis. Or I, like 99.9 percent of the earth's population, would list tennis below shuffleboard, darts, and hopscotch as things worth paying attention to.
But alas, you're a far more distinguished member of society so I'm sure I just can't comprehend the brilliance your diaries bring to the board. Gotta run, time to eat my slop.
Good luck generating your own diaries. I'm sure they will be fully appreciated by 50.1% or more of the world's population, else they are garbage.
Most people don't generate content because they receive accolades from mods/staff/whomever. And they certainly don't do it for a point bump. You have many, many points.
Fall in line and praise this man, damnit. His knowledge of tennis and North Campus is vast, we must acknowledge his greatness and worship him.
One of my favorite aspects of writing diaries was in reading the comments and getting new ideas and new directions for investigation. If that is all the accolades I get then so be it, but I think that the system can be modified to encourage more user-generated content. To me, that is the great strength of this site.
Thank you also for setting up this thread.
Is that the more you reward the mere generation of content, the more much of that content will suck, as some people will do it just to get the points. And if you rely on some subjective measurement, it pisses people off because they think the mods (or whoever judges the content) are trying to enforce "groupthink" by rewarding likeminded people.
Not sure if there's a good solution.
But there's still a long way to go in the offseason.
A. LONG. Way.
Fuck the Ask Toolbar and the Java installer it rode in on. Seriously, though, who is going to willingly allow you to install the Ask Toolbar on their computer? Oh, that's right, my parents and my in-laws. And who gets stuck fixing the computer when the Ask Toolbar is eating half the memory in the computer and altering search results? Oh, that's right, me.
Shitty thing is, even if you set them up with extensions that block ads/installers/scripts that they have no idea how to turn off...they still manage to fuck shit up. I feel like its karma payback from when I was just a young lad.
I've lost respect for so many open source projects when I see they've bundled some stupid fucking bloatware into their installer. I know you need to raise money and stuff, but seriously find another fucking way.
Along those lines, bloatware in general. It's not as bad on desktop PCs anymore, but remember back in the day when every PC manufacturer would bundle all sorts of worthess shit into their operating systems? That was terrible. And now Android manufacturers seem to be doing the same goddamned thing. HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I feel like I'm on a roll now so I'm going to keep going. Companies that refuse to learn from the mistakes of companies that came before them. Watching the movie industry follow the same fruitless path of the music industry in their attempts to stop piracy/sharing, and now the book industry is starting in on it the exact same way. DRM DOES NOT WORK! IT HAS NEVER WORKED! There are better ways to go about this.
This has gone a little more off-base than I'd originally planned, but switching back toward the original point, people who think that computers are magical, indecipherable back boxes and that because I do something related to computers for a job I must be able to solve all the problems they're having. Seriously, all I do is this: http://xkcd.com/627/. If you can't do that yourself, it's not because you're "computer illiterate," it's because you're dumb.
To the little prick who drives through my neighborhood at 40mph bumping his shitty rap music when my kids are sleeping. I hate you. I'm not old enough to dislike rap music, but can't you at least bump something good? If Biggy, Pac, Mos Def, and Jay-Z are too old for you, I'd even settle for someone along the lines of Lupe Fiasco. Get your Black Eyed Peas bitch ass outta my street. If you want to take your shitty campus club music with you while you drive recklessly around my quiet subdivision, then simply drive off the road and into an 80 year old oak tree. You're impressing precisely nobody.
And for those on MGoBlog with a dissenting opinion, I'm like a 50 year old trapped in a 28 year old body. Deal with it. Also, jeers at Brian for not implementing the old points system in the offseason as promised. I realize that the jet-set lifestyle of a niche blogger results in zero downtime, but c'mon man. Your lackadaisical attitude on the subject has opened the door for the mouthbreathers to come in here and start spouting about O$U and Mark Dumbtonio, all while creating topics on the Bachelor and professing their rigidity towards recruiting trends. Shame on you all.
I hate you all. I award none of you any points. In observance of half Festivus, I'm negging all of you bastards. Doesn't matter though. There's not even a fake penalty involved anymore...
someone needs a hug.
hugs are for pussies, losers, slackers, and low achievers. Anger is the key to success in life. Or angar if you prefer.