Know your enemy: the state of Ohio

Submitted by StephenRKass on September 2nd, 2014 at 7:06 AM

With my wife being from Cleveland, I've spent more time in Ohio than I care to remember. Here is an interesting take on the state. Several of the mgoshirts are a fine approximation as well.

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September 2nd, 2014 at 7:51 AM ^

Ohio native, living in Columbus. This map is 100% accurate except for Athens county. Don't indulge Ohio University. They are Meth labs and Dollar Generals like the rest of SE Ohio. 


September 2nd, 2014 at 8:29 AM ^

Just the memory I needed to add a spark to my day... LOVE Donkey Coffee. I was on campus when it opened and began to rock everyone's world. Chris and Angie (the owners) are such great people and run an awesome business. 

Thanks for the pick-me-up


September 2nd, 2014 at 12:39 PM ^

Leave Ohio University out of this. After all, it is The  original Ohio university. Columbus just likes to pretend its school is with the affectation. 

The only bad thing I can say about OU is that Dantonio student taught there. But we all start from somewhere, and OU is OK in that regard. 


September 2nd, 2014 at 12:01 PM ^

 As someone who's spend a lot of time in Cleveland, gone to school in Dayton, gone to school and lived in Cincinnati, and live in Columbus... I would say this map is right. Greater Cinci is more like Kentucky than Ohio. Dayton has Pilots. Cincinnati is slum and rust belt. Hearing every single person I work with talk about being from Youngstown, it IS mob central. I'm not sure Chicago ever had anything on what Youngstown has now. One of my best friends went to school at OU and that's pretty much the way he talks about it... 

So. You're going to say what about neglecting one school in the vast hinterland of Ohio that even people who live there are agreeing with?



September 2nd, 2014 at 8:20 AM ^

an argument could be made for chopping "The South" down to just a handful of counties (Hamilton, Butler, Warren) --- and extending "West Virginia" a few counties further to the west.  But otherwise it's spot-on.


September 2nd, 2014 at 8:44 AM ^

As a former Ohio resident, I cast another vote for "spot-on". I was surprised at the stark cultural transformation upon venturing south or east of Columbus. You are not in the Midwest anymore. One funny thing I found about Franklin County (or I guess just more the city of Columbus), was that, yes, 90% are die-hard Buckeyes, but the 10% who aren't...hate all things OSU. I am sure that is to be found in many places, but I was surprised by the vehemence with which I heard it expressed in Columbus.


September 2nd, 2014 at 8:47 AM ^

I will say this - in all the times we've taken I-75 south to the Cincinnati area to visit some of my wife's extended family (the bulk of them being in Chicago), the drive from just south of Toledo to the Dayton area or thereabouts is one of the most hypnotizingly dull stretches of road ever conceived by man. There is, almost literally, nothing to look at. It's almost as if people forgot about this part of Ohio.


September 2nd, 2014 at 9:19 AM ^

FOR EIGHT YEARS! (Yes, I meant to shout, in a virtual sense). It was painful beyond all measure.

I worked on a project in Dayton and drove down each Monday morning and back each Thursday evening or Friday morning. I lived - to the extent that downtown Dayton can be called "living" - near the U of D campus.

Ever see that California Dairy commercial where the grandma cow has nightmares about growing up in the snow and cold of Wisconsin? Yeah, it's like that, but with less California.


September 2nd, 2014 at 9:47 AM ^

I've been doing the Cincinnati to Detroit drive about 6 times a year for 10 years now (since 2004).  It is a very un-enjoyable drive.  I-75 in Downtown Dayton is especially painful: it has never NOT been under construction during that time!  And it still looks like they're several years from completing whatever it is they're doing.  Just horrible.  


September 2nd, 2014 at 11:43 AM ^

And most of the rest of the state, as well. Exit and entrance ramps to the right AND left, orange barrels planted like trees for miles without any sign of construction activity, and a speed limit that fluctuates up and down for no apparent reason. Forget about Texas; Ohio's the state most like a whole other planetcountry.


September 2nd, 2014 at 12:14 PM ^

And it still looks like they're several years from completing whatever it is they're doing.

Good god, this makes me laugh.  I used to bitch about this all the time when I lived in Dayton . . . in the 1980's.  When I went back for occasional visits in the '90's and '00's, it was still the same.  I have not been there in a decade, but it sounds like it is still the same.

That means it has been a mess for 30+ years straight.  Somebody is getting some kind of payoff.

Yes, the drive from Dayton to A2 is miserable.  This used to be the drive I would do for every Michigan home game for years.  When I finally saw the "Ann Arbor" signs, it wa like reaching an oasis in the desert. 



September 2nd, 2014 at 4:28 PM ^

I drive up from Atlanta usually twice a year and have been doing it for the last 5 years.  The trip isn't bad till you get to Cincinatti.  Then it just spirals into boredome and stupidity.  I usually don't fly because having a kid now just exponentially increases cost and I don't feel it's worth it.  That and how much it costs to board a dog...  It's getting to the point that I now feel it's worth it JUST to not have to deal with Ohio.  The construction starts just north of Dayton and stops right before the baseball stadium in Cincinatti.  I dated a girl in Florence KY for a while and driving down there 10 years ago it was the same.  


All of that to say the state sucks and the construction hasn't changed in at least 10 years.  If you've not drove it in a decade, then I picked up where you left off and that means it has been a disaster for 30+ years.  

CRISPed in the DIAG

September 2nd, 2014 at 10:07 AM ^

I did this drive 5 or 6x/year for about 15 years thanks to visits to in-laws in Mason, OH.  Add the excruciating leg from GR to AA (no joyride in itself) and that's my trip.  For 15 years.  At least 5 or six times.  Per Year.  

I don't condone driving stoned.  But Lima, OH would look a hell of a lot better if I was.

oriental andrew

September 2nd, 2014 at 10:15 AM ^

I grew up in Atlanta, so the drive between Atlanta and AA took me up 75 through Tennessee and Kentucky, which are gorgeous to driver through, and then through Ohio. Once you're past Cincy, the state gets pretty lame pretty fast. Out past Dayton, it's frightfully dull. Can't agree more with other upthread on this point.


September 2nd, 2014 at 10:58 AM ^

I used to have to do this drive a lot since our manufacturing facility was just south of Dayton. I was always really happy when the rental car had XM radio because otherwise there were only two types of radio stations for about 2.5 hours of the drive (conservative talk and Christian- no politics or religion). The fall time at least had some changing colors.  Mostly it was just put the car and my mind on cruise control at a paltry 67 mph.

Another thing I hated about the drive was you had to leave by a certain time.  If you left to late, you hit Dayton lunch traffic, Toledo afternoon traffic and Detroit afternoon traffic, adding a couple hours to the drive.

They also have ice storms when we have blizzards.  As much as I hate driving in a blizzard, I'll take it any day over driving through an ice storm.