As I watched yet another very winnable game slip away yesterday I started to think that Michigan football, circa 2011, could be thought of in some ways like a Chinese restaurant. This particular restaurant struggled recently even though their food was quite good (award winning even), but service was poor and business slipped like never before. A new owner was found and he decided that to make things better (like the good old days) he'd bring in a new business manager to run the front of the business (Mattision) and a new head chef to run the kitchen (Borges).
Service improved almost immediately and people noticed. Customers were seated promptly, orders were taken as they should and the food was delivered hot and on time. While not perfect things were SO much better people started to remark how much the restaurant reminded them of "back in the day" and everyone was amazed just how fast the new Manager was able to restore this restaurant to their past glory days.
The only problem for this Chinese restaurant is that the new head chef was Italian and had never cooked Chinese a day in his life before. People asked "are you going to be able to retain the old menu? Is the restaurant going to stay Chinese or are you going to convert it to Italian? The chef said "don't worry I know what I'm doing. I can blend the best of both cuisines into one and create even more delicious meals than ever before!"
But instead of food people wanted to eat every day very odd creations got introduced onto the menu. Inedible specials like General Tsio's Rigatoni or Moo Goo Gai Ravioli or even the infamous Hot and Sour, Egg Drop Wedding Soup. And every day the chef said "don't worry I got this" as the kitchen creations got weirder and weirder still. And nobody had any idea what the restaurant was good at or even wanted to serve anymore.