Brown (not that Brown) at Safety? A What-If Scenario That Means Absolutely Nothing

Submitted by Seth on November 5th, 2009 at 3:25 PM

In light of recent research, etc., it seems what Michigan could use more than anything right now is a solid safety.


Like a senior, highly rated, responsible, football smart, playmaking safety.

Like, let's just say, the No. 6 defensive back of 2006.

Some guy named Brown.

Like this guy (after ad):

Now, this has no bearing whatsoever on the current team, because it is way too late to make this change.

But what if Carlos Brown had, at some point in his career, converted back to safety?

Safety Carlos Brown?

I believe the reason for Brown's surprising Michigan commitment was that Lloyd promised him he could play tailback. Someone else may confirm that for me -- that's memory's service, and I have proven to have a bad memory.

Now, a promise is a promise, say they, unless it's a promise to a player about the position he will ultimately end up at.

Subject to the will of the service.

Could it Have Happened?

The depth problems at safety have been known about for a long time. They were a certainty, at the latest, by Spring 2007, when Jonas Mouton's move to linebacker meant Lloyd's staff had to know that its post-Englemon/Adams future was essentially Stevie Brown ('06) and Michael Williams ('07) [meeting their respective expectations] or bust.*

At that point S.Brown was a hypey sophomore, and Williams a not-yet-enrolled freshman headed for a redshirt. That was it for depth.

Meanwhile, in Spring 2007, the post-Hart tailback outlook was Brandon Minor (already heir apparent after some long runs as a freshman), Kevin Grady (whose future on the team was by that point in some doubt), Carlos Brown, and Avery Horn (Mister Simpson was already transferring). Sam McGuffie and Mike Cox [sic] already had happy teeth.**

I mean, gee, what if at some point in Spring 2007 Carr pulled Carlos Brown aside and said something...something...something


Hey, guys, I wonder what it was like back in Spring 2007...Spring 2007...Spring 2007


Wouldn't it be great, guys, if we could go back to 2007 and see what that conversation would be like?...would be like?...would be like?

[in Carr voice]
"Carlos, hey Carlos, come in and talk. Listen, I know that I made a promise to you that if you came here you'd be a running back, and that our pact would stand in the way, or let's say 'occlude' your moving to another position. That will be your word today, Carlos, 'occlude.' You and your teammates will all learn 'occlude' today.

Now listen, Carlos. I have Hart and he is tremendous. And I have Minor, and he is also tremendous. So I have two tremendous backs this year. And I also have Grady, if he can ever get that cranial occlusion out of his rectum. So my depth at your position is pretty good right now. Not tremendous, but pretty good.

But Carlos, I am looking toward the future here, and I have already noticed, as you probably have, that the guys I have that are your age at safety have a similar rectal occlusion of the crania, particularly your namesake, that wirey kid who made me change Grady's number.

Carlos, you played safety in high school. You were a tremendous safety, if I remember. And we can still redshirt you.

We can go into this year with Hart and Minor, and if anything happens to those guys, you and I are right back where we started. But if you hang off the field this season, you can work with the safeties again. And then by next year, Carlos, you'll still be a sophomore, and we will have some depth at defensive back. I think you could easily be our starter in 2008, Carlos, especially given the aforementioned crania-in-rectum situation of the other Brown kid.

I think we have a chance to do some great things with this team in this environment, Carlos.

So, whattaya say, Carlos? You know as everyone else kind of knows that I won't be around here much longer. I want to know that I left Michigan in the kind of shape to continue having the kind of success we've had here. I want to be sure that I'm not leaving a vital position on our defense -- you know how I love good defense Carlos -- to the off-chance that someone can get production out of that guy whose got such a cranial occlusion of the rectum he's seeing the name on the back of his jersey. Are you up for it? Do you wanna be a safety again?

So whaddayathink? Do you wonder if Lloyd would have gone for it? Do you wonder if Carlos would have accepted? Do you wonder if it would have worked? Do you wonder how many games Michigan might have won in 2008 through 2010 if it had worked? Do you wonder if Russell Crowe was in the room when this conversation was taking place?

I guess it's implausible now (both C.Brown at safety and Russell Crowe being in whatever room you're in at the moment). If it was plausible, I would have made this a diary, and included cha..




But a man can dream sequence, can't he?

* "Bust" at that point meant "Artis Chambers"



November 5th, 2009 at 3:49 PM ^

We should just throw him out there in a game to see what happens. (JK) He might make the same mistakes our other safties make, but at least he would have the speed to make up for it sometimes.


November 5th, 2009 at 3:59 PM ^

I know, the speed thing, right?

Then again, his R-B-fectiveness (this is a portmanteau of "running back" and "effectiveness") is hurt by "bad vision," which doesn't bode well for the read-and-react skills of a safety.

But we have RB depth, and have had RB depth his whole career.

What we don't have is a redshirt junior safety with blazing speed. We had a redshirt sophomore, of course, but he had to be moved to corner. So if our safety version of Steve Brown is Troy Woolfolk plus one year, isn't that, like, exactly what we need?


November 5th, 2009 at 4:08 PM ^

Loved the "word of the day" feature; that tidbit of the Lloyd era had slipped away. Spring of 2007, pre-Horror, LC was probably pretty sure DeBord would succeed him.


November 5th, 2009 at 4:09 PM ^

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought Brown switched to DB for some time (maybe part of an offseason), then switched back due to injury. If that's true, your idea may not be as far fetched as you think.


November 5th, 2009 at 6:02 PM ^

I never thought I would say this after screaming at him all of last season, but I have also been wondering lately about switching Brown (yes that Brown) to FS. I'd rather see a FS occasionally whiff on a tackle than have him never even make it onto the TV screen. (No offense to Kovacs--love the kid. Just sayin...)


November 5th, 2009 at 6:38 PM ^

your "name", but I am always happy to see the maize construction hat and eager to read what imagination and/or facts weaved together to tell a story or make a great observation.

Thanks to you, I like Lloyd even more today.

Here's to RR reading your post and calling an emergency meeting of the defensive coaches!


November 6th, 2009 at 11:17 AM ^


Means "Beard Hater" in Greek (though I'm not Greek, and I have a beard)

It's the name of a self-mocking play that the Emperor Julian (ruled a generation and change after Constantine) wrote about himself when he (a pagan) marched into the very Christian town of Antioch. He had a beard; the Christian fashion de jure was clean-shaven.

Christians today call him the "apostate," since he was a Christian who converted to paganism and then became the pagan champion, just like I'm a son of a lately MSU-trending family who went hardcore to the Blue.

Julian later burned his ships behind him when attacking Persia (emulating Alexander the Great). This turned out to be not so much a good idea, because when he had to run away from the Persians, he then had no ships.

The name also starts with "MI"

An anagram is "M Go Poison" That was an accident.

Tha Stunna

November 5th, 2009 at 7:06 PM ^

Hm, I thought that Carlos Brown was close to transferring at some point but got talked back into staying. A position switch would probably not have helped him to stick around. Still, an interesting and original what-if that I liked.


November 5th, 2009 at 8:52 PM ^

Did you post this here, and not in the Dairies?

Otherwise: Interesting stuff. And a fun read.

I think those of us who put forth diaries should put our e-heads together and do a series of 'What If' type posts throughout the course of UM football history. Something for to write about in the off season.

This would be a model for that.