AIRBHG nearly finished with Iowa

Submitted by lakeside on October 15th, 2012 at 2:44 PM

Iowa's starting running back (actually a walk-on converted fullback) is out for this week's game against Penn State. That leaves..




True freshman Greg Garmon as the starter!!  His backup being Jordan Canzeri who - wait for it - has not played a down sing tearing his ACL during spring ball.



October 15th, 2012 at 2:50 PM ^

Blasphemer! As long as Iowa continues to defy AIRBHG by lining players up behind the QB AIRBHG will never be finished with Iowa.

With his mighty hand he smote them all......


October 15th, 2012 at 3:05 PM ^

It truly is amazing.  Its so common at this point that Iowa fans will keel over in the thousands if their starting RB after spring ball ever plays a down.  I hate to make fun because the karma's gonna get us . . .


October 15th, 2012 at 9:50 PM ^

I would presume the scholarship is released upon death, but if the death is due to sacrifice? Or are you thinking they would just over sign and bloody the altar until AIRBHG is sated? I hear that is what Saban does, but we all know its not AIRBHG that he calls upon…

Naked Bootlegger

October 15th, 2012 at 3:31 PM ^

Is it mere coincidence that Lloyds of London has ceased writing policies for "athletically-inclined Iowans who may receive American-style footballs while lined up 5-7 yards behind the Quarterbacking position1,2?"

1In the so-called "shotgun" American football formations, the distance between said athletically-inclined Iowan and the Quarterbacking position is minimized and is still subject to policy termination.

2The "pistol" formation is currently exempt, but will receive further scrutiny if employed in offensive sets by the University of Iowa American Football team.



October 15th, 2012 at 3:38 PM ^

This is incredible.  Pretty soon the hysteria and fear will be such in Iowa City that they'll be looking to sacrifice virgins to appease AIRBHG.  Where they will find virgins on U of I's campus is beyond me.


October 15th, 2012 at 3:52 PM ^

Iowa's RBs truly are a damned lot.  At least they seem to be embracing it at Black Heart Gold Pants, and they're throwing a party for AIRBHG (link here).  Although the AIRBHG piñata might be seen as blasphemous in the eyes of the vengful diety.


October 15th, 2012 at 4:05 PM ^

I am comforted by the fact the we have LBs and DBs coming in all of whom moonlight at RB... and we even have a couple of actual RBs coming in too... just in case AIRBHG takes his talents east.


October 15th, 2012 at 4:02 PM ^

Saw the guy limping on the sidlines after his touchdown to tie it up in 4th quarter.  I understand he's not listed on the Depth Chart and won't be surprised if he doesn't play against Penn St. Saturday night, but I also won't be surprised if the guy is starting; he seems like a tough SOB and if he's able to overcome this, he'll be on the field.


October 15th, 2012 at 5:39 PM ^

If Garmon gets dinged and the back-up coming off an ACL can't do it, I wonder what they do during a game?  I'm guessing they pull a young DB off the defesnse, since they don't seem like they can run an empty backfield all game long.  Incredible. 


October 15th, 2012 at 6:28 PM ^

Is every program in the country not named Iowa doing something different with injury prevention?  Perhaps Iowa can hire someone who can work with strengthening ankles and knees for their players...


October 15th, 2012 at 9:04 PM ^

They must only have QBs, WRs, and FBs in the backfield. Weisman is back to being a FB now. Garmon is a QB. Perhaps then, the AIRBHG will be confused and will not smite them