OT: Hello: Chris Rock (The Comedy One)

Submitted by Drill on May 30th, 2010 at 4:58 PM

GBW is reporting a commitment from Andrews, South Carolina comedian Chris Rock.  Rock was not able to make the BBQ and this commitment is completely out of the blue.  He had no other offers at the time of his commitment.

INFORMATIVE PORTION

GURU RANKINGS

Comedy Central's 100 Greatest Comedians EntertainmentRankings.com faqs.org
#5 Stand-Up #3 Stand-Up #52 Stand-Up

 

EntertainmentRankings.com:

Chris Rock, to me, now that Carlin and Pryor have both passed, is the greatest living stand-up and the funniest comedian over the last 20 years.

Faqs.org, begins by talking about one of Rock's negatives:

...he's known predominantly for racial humor...

but then follows up with praise almost on par with EntertainmentRankings.com:

...funny is funny and Chris Rock is one of the funniest human beings on the planet.

And then finishes off with an assessment of one of his strengths:

Perhaps the greatest testament to his skill is how mainstream he's become: despite talking about controversial topics such as race and sex and working very "Blue" he's loved by inner city minorities, white suburban dads, and elderly WWII vets.

Rock is listed consistently at 5-11 and 45 years old.  He has appeared in several movies, such as Beverly Hills Cop II, Boomerang, and Dogma.  He also attended the Academy Awards in 2005 as the host, to mixed reviews.

OFFERS

Chris Rock has reported no other offers at this time.  Probably because he's a 45 year old comedian and not a football player.  Presumably Rodriguez and his staff intended to offer Columbus DeSales defensive end Chris Rock rather than the comedian and there was just a clerical error.

STATS

Chris Rock spent 3 years on Saturday Night Live and was on 60 different episodes.  He has also been the director, writer, actor, or producer on several movies.

FAKE 40 TIME

Comedians do not have 40 times, hence they can not be fake.

VIDEO

Highlights (NSFW audio):

You can also see a video of Chris Rock talking about drugs (more NSFW audio).

PREDICTION BASED ON FLIMSY EVIDENCE

Being a 45-year old comedian and not a football player, Chris Rock seems like a lock for a redshirt while they get him in shape for football.  After that, he may be moved to punter or holder, where the chance of him being injured will be minimized.

Following his redshirt season, Rock likely still will not see playing time, unless we're facing Delaware State again.  He will probably be used as a motivational tool for the team.

UPSHOT FOR THE REST OF THE CLASS

Chris Rock is the first comedian in the 2011 class and likely the last.  Unfortunately, this leaves one fewer scholarship spot for the 2011 class.  This offer seems like a reach, at best.  They really should have offered the defensive end from Columbus instead.

Comments

WildcatBlue

May 30th, 2010 at 7:01 PM ^

With the all the reads and misdirection in RR's game I'd say we should be recruiting from the improv world, rather than from among stand-ups.  This guy is entering his 20th junior year at Dr. Phillips HS in Orlando, and I'd be shocked if we don't end up offering:

 

He's an inch taller than Rock, and imo has better lateral movement. 

However, in the aftermath of the Dorsey signing there may be some reluctance among the coaching staff due to rumored character issues.