Mock Rock 2010

Submitted by JimBobTressel-0 on February 16th, 2010 at 10:49 PM

(re-posted from thread)

Just got back. Great time.

The judges were: some hater from the media (a Michigan grad) named Ryan, who was the Simon Cowell-esque bad guy. Seriously, that is the exact role he played. Softball coach Carol Hutchins, who gave out only decimals (8.2 for example). A little girl, 8 years old, and former Mott's patient, who gave out 10's to every act (but one), and Woodson, who was a reasonable judge.

You got your usual "let's wear tights in flamboyant colors and rub up against each other with glowsticks acts" (men's tennis, men's swimming and diving)

You got your AWFUL acts. Women's tennis tried a magic show and it stunk. Men's lacrosse attempted a rap about..lax bros. Being a bro. It didn't work out. And Women's Water Polo parodied commercials. Yeah. They brought out the Aflac duck, for example. It was so bad, even the host made fun of it.

Women's rowing attempted "I'm on a Boat!" That SNL skit. It was pretty good, funny in some parts. The level of costume detail was incredible.

The athletic trainers had their own skit, which was cool to see. Themed "Athletic Trainers after hours". They had a song and dance, with props like medicine balls, huge balance balls, etc. But they got a 8 from the little girl, which like WTF haha. The entire crowd gasped.

But women's cross country/track stole the show. They performed a Mo-town skit, a la Soul Train, and took us through some 70's funk. The Temptations, Jackson 5...etc. I loved it, and it got first place.

Let's see...mens track did Toy Story, which was pretty of the judges claimed to have never seen Toy Story. WTF.

Marching Band, lead by my friend D-Hinez (drum major) took it to another level. They created an Alice in Big Ten Wonderland Skit, about a girl trying to decide where to go to college between us, OSU, MSU, PSU.

featuring the Mad Hatter and the PSU crew, who like to party all day..

Two little, Sparty-gear donning twins who Alice said to "Aww, you're so cute! Like my little Brothers!"

...and the Queen of Hearts as the "Queen of Buckeyes", who got a hearty boo. Then they danced to "Poker Face" by lady Gaga.

Men's soccer was probably the funniest. Contemporary Dramatic Readings + Britney Spears lyrics = HILARITY. Something like this

Football? They just hopped around to this song

Their performance was alright, but nothing special. It got a 10 from a clearly biased Woodson, who admitted as much.

I kept waiting for the men's basketball team to burst out onto the stage...It didn't click till more than an hour in that they were in Iowa.

*EDIT* How could I forget? The sheer awesomeness of Men's Rowing Star Wars skit! Luke! Yoda! X-fighters and Tie-Fighters! a Death Star! Han Solo, R2D2, C-3P0, Darth Vader.. Lightsabers...and a narrator.

P.S. I had my own geekout session when I walked out and saw the Brandons (Graham and Minor) talking to Greg Robinson and his family. That was cool. I mean, they're normal people and all...but still awesome.



February 16th, 2010 at 11:16 PM ^

I disagree with your assessment of the football team, I thought theirs was one of the top 3 of the night. I also thought the girl's track team was ok, but did not deserve the perfect score they got. You also neglected to mention the athletic trainers, who were robbed by the little girl haha. If I had to rank the performances, I would have said, 1. Men's track and field, 2. Athletic Trainers, 3. Football


February 16th, 2010 at 11:18 PM ^

The football team came wearing t-shirts and jeans, just like last year, and hopped around the stage doing a simple dance, just like last year. I mean, if the soccer team had done that, I wouldn't really have cared. They weren't bad, actually they were pretty good.

Also, I did mention the trainers

OMG Shirtless

February 17th, 2010 at 8:05 AM ^

A. I would never knowingly allow myself to congregate in public with fucking band geeks.
B. If a girl I was seeing even talked to a member of the marching band, I would immediately forget that I even knew the girl, pray for her to contract AIDS, and hope her first born child was a retard.
C. I'm getting dangerously close to 3000 points, I need to go off on hate inspired rants every now and then to make sure that doesn't happen, even if I don't really mean what I say.


February 16th, 2010 at 11:25 PM ^

They actually had a guitarist and drum set used in this one. They got good scores from the judges and were only marked down because their skit was what they did as a team and not something else.


February 16th, 2010 at 11:36 PM ^

I'm on a Boat... Another skit with great props but people and props kept coming out of nowhere which makes it tricky to record. So as a fair warning, this video pans around the stage quite a bit.


February 16th, 2010 at 11:39 PM ^

Contemporary Dramatic Reading. This one was just too funny. I couldn't watch and record at the same time but I managed to record something. This video is extremely shaky and I had to put the camera down part of the way through the skit.


February 17th, 2010 at 7:44 PM ^

They seemed to have official cameras in some capacity there, I'm sure video will be released soon. It isn't anything too interesting other than him pitching Mott's and just explaining his scores. I also took it upon myself to yell "Do the Heisman!" like a jackass when there was a silent period during his introduction on stage. On a side note, did anyone think Mike Kosta (Kofta, Kofsta.. I don't know) was actually funny?


February 17th, 2010 at 9:24 PM ^

I thought he was really funny. His opening had me laughing a lot and his deliver on most of the jokes were spot on. There were a couple times I thought he might have been overwhelmed a little, but overall I thought he did very good. I liked how you could tell he really wanted to go off on that jackass tool media judge, but had to hold himself back.


February 17th, 2010 at 9:24 AM ^

I actually laughed a bit at the wrestling team's performance. They had the Snooki punch from Jersey Shore, Tiger Woods, and a "tribute" to Michael Jackson that got some groans from the audience.

All and all, a very fun event.