Demetri Martin Cracks on Tressel (kind of)

Submitted by Swayze Howell Sheen on May 21st, 2009 at 5:24 PM

Demetri Martin is an awesome comedian. Check out his show on Comedy Central, or many youtube clips, or even his albums to find out more.

Here we recount a recent joke about vests.

"Vests exist to protect you from things.

A life vest protects you from drowning.

A bullet-proof vest protects you from getting shot.

A sweatervest protects you from having a girlfriend."

This bit was much too enjoyable not to post here where there is a particularly refined enmity towards all things sweatervest-y.

For those who are uninitiated, Demetri Martin offers forth a brand of "nerd humor" which
one might suspect would be popular among the mgoblog crowd. Some other examples:

A friend asks "Do you have a Plan B if this comedian thing doesn't work out?"
Martin: "Hell no! I number my plans"

Another joke about batteries:

"It's a good thing they don't have 'B' batteries. If they did, it would sound like you were stuttering when you asked for them."

Finally, a random joke:

"I wish I lived next to Carnegie Hall. Then, if someone asked me how to get to my
house, I would just say 'Practice, practice, practice, and then take a left.'"

And yes, this really doesn't have much to do with football. Other disclaimers:
this was not written by Demetri Martin. This was not written with any real
objective at all. Well, maybe one: to get you to go look up some Demetri Martin
clips and enjoy them as much as I have. Is that so wrong?


His Dudeness

May 22nd, 2009 at 9:20 AM ^

I am seeing Demetri in Seattle this weekend. SASQUATCH FEST!!!! Look up the line-up, it is a freaking dream. Demetri is a smart comic and I like smart comics.

Also, I like the name Coner's Boners. It made me laugh.