Unverified Voracity Wears Awesome Glasses

Submitted by Brian on September 20th, 2010 at 4:15 PM

Note for students: Maize Rage mass meeting 7PM in the League's Vandenberg room. Who wants some FREEEEEEE PIIIZZZAAAA?

Further adventures in epic rootability. Remember how Darryl Stonum was this year's Roy Roundtree, who was in turn Michigan's version of Rick Vaughn? Yeah, Stonum is taking the comparison as far as he can without literally raiding whichever Planet Hollywood contains the skull-and-crossbones originals:

stonum-wild-thing

Awesome. He was probably thinking Run DMC, but either way it is epic.

Just plain epic. This is astounding:

denard-robinson-action-figure

I would buy a billion of these before they were taken from us. Sadly these are not extant, but you can get it as your wallpaper.

The Freude. You will want to check out This Week In Schadenfreude this go-round for obvious reasons:

My 11 year old thinks ND football is a joke
by btd (2010-09-19 00:43:18)

She can't grasp why they are even on TV. She said it tonight. "Daddy, why does anyone care about Notre Dame? Have they ever been good?"

Basically there isn't a kid alive today that has ever seen real ND football.

This running diary didn't even make it in because I ran out of room:

12:06 Went and got a bottle of NyQuil and a bottle of Woodford Reserve. Placed them both on the table in front of me. Flipping a coin to see which one I start chugging.

12:10 Why?

12:16 WHY DO WE HAVE THIS BLACK CLOUD HANGING OVER OUR FOOTBALL PROGRAM!?!?

The freude is strong this week. BONUS: find out where Tacopants transferred. It won't be a surprise.

Mascot win. So the Ohio Bobcat got fired, reprimanded, and banned for life from Ohio athletics for a spectacular attack on the Ohio State mascot:

So worth it. He's never going to have to buy a drink in Ann Arbor, State College, or any other Big Ten city.

Elsewhere in fantastic misbehavior, Orson's Alphabetical catches an old Arizona fan shattering a child's innocence:

The look on the kid's face afterward is priceless: "this never happens to me in Iowa."

The latest lack of outrage. This is probably the most convincing explanation of an assumed ref disaster ever. It's about the delay of game, or lack thereof, on the Michigan State fake punt:

"The responsibility is assigned to the Back Judge, who in this situation was standing beneath the upright. Proper mechanics dictate that his focus be directed to the play clock as it approaches zero. When the play clock display reads zero, he must re-direct his attention to the ball. At that time, if the snap has not started, a flag will be thrown for delay of game. If the snap has begun, no flag will be thrown.

"Under these procedures, there will always be a small amount of lag time between the time the clock reads zero and the time the Back Judge is able to see the football.

"On the play in question, this lag time created the situation where it appears the play clock expired just before the snap. We believe the snap occurred well within the normal lag time for the Back Judge to make this determination.

That makes total sense. I wish officials would do this more often. Issue little dicta explaining why penalties were (or in some cases, were not) called and you reduce the complaining at least somewhat.

Bork on. Hockey season is going to start soon and Red Berenson is talking them up:

"We realized we were as good as anybody at the end of last year and this team will take that (confidence) and put that on the ice,"  …

"Does it make our team better? Definitely, it's huge," said Berenson of having Hagelin and Caporusso back. "You're so much more optimistic because you know who your top players are. I felt they had their heads in the right place. They are really invested in this program."

The usual blunt assessments of early departures (Pacioretty and Palushaj are in the AHL and "probably don't like it") are also included along with an interesting Cold War II tidbit: the rink will be Olympic size. Advantage to a quicker Michigan team, no doubt.

Etc.: Congratulations, commenters, for not being NDNation about Dantonio's heart attack. It is in this way we will not be a newspaper's comment section. By request, shots of Michigan Stadium's renovation from above. MGoBlog invades North Korea. Srsly. The Team, The Team, The Team: the video they played Saturday.

Comments

Chunks the Hobo

September 20th, 2010 at 4:38 PM ^

Does anyone else remember when Michigan's male cheerleaders used to "sneak up" on the opposing team's mascot, pick him up, and make a show out of smashing his nuts on the goal post?

That was awesome. Let's hire the Bobcat to come in for the Sparty game.

The FannMan

September 20th, 2010 at 4:40 PM ^

That is just plain awesome.  Words fail to do it justice.  Please see the picture posted by Rash.  It is all that needs to be said.

Where do I buy my "The Bobcat Kicked Brutus's Ass" t-shrits.  Hello MGoStore????

Bodogblog

September 20th, 2010 at 8:37 PM ^

in years.  Read about it on the blog all day.  Didn't seem like it would be that funny.  I'm in tears and my stomach hurts.  This man must come to AA for his parade

Did you see him?  He's kind of staring... looking over the horizon for his prey.  When he appears he runs like a little like a pissed off little bastard, right into the charging band and flags.  He breaks down!  He misses the tackle but gets right back after it.  After bringing him down the buckeye is all "... geez Wally, what you do that for??..."  And the guy's like "Whats Up???!!" 

Epic.  Hilarious.  I wish I had done this in my life.  Success. 

umchicago

September 20th, 2010 at 5:28 PM ^

seriously, a ref can't look at the play clock and watch the snap in his peripheral vision?  how the heck do umpires make calls at first base (galarraga play aside)?

MGoRob

September 20th, 2010 at 9:15 PM ^

To add onto the MSU delay of game saga.  If you look at ABC's play clock and the stadium's playclock, they are exactly 1 second apart.  So if you were watching the TV you'd think the ball was snapped almost a full 1-2 seconds after it reached 0, however that is not the case.  The stadium clock clearly reads 1 sec when the ABC clock reads 0 sec, and the ball is snapped less than half a second after the stadium clock expired.

So if the ref was watching the stadium clock, then there would have been no time to whistle delay of game as they stated about there being a "moment" to check the snap after the cock expires.

Didre

September 20th, 2010 at 5:42 PM ^

Does anyone remember former diver Bruce Kimball tackling Brutus while he was running around the field waving the tOSU flag? I believe it was in 1983. I think I have a picture of it buried in a box at home.

Dan86

September 20th, 2010 at 9:48 PM ^

in Ann Arbor about this time.  He was on the field and not in uniform so I assumed he was a recruit.  He dove at Brutus' legs and took him down, which ripped off the Ohio State flag.  Brutus got up and threatened him with the flag staff.   It was crazy and hilarious.   Michigan 28, Ohio State 0.  (1983)

iawolve

September 20th, 2010 at 5:32 PM ^

That short video is so messed up on so many levels. Unfortunately the kid's tortured look combined with the joy/madness on the old geezer's face will probably haunt my dreams once I stop laughing (sorry that is so twisted). That old dude has to have bodies buried under his house, seriously don't walk on his lawn.