Unverified Voracity Remembers Cajun Brady Hoke Comment Count

Brian June 20th, 2017 at 2:42 PM


[Bryan Fuller]

Naturally. If Harbaugh can't do camps he's going to do something:

Jim Harbaugh takes on clerk role in Genesee Probate Court

This will result in lawyers dorkin' out:

Flint Attorney Rick Hetherington, who appeared on a child support motion, on the way out asked: "Excuse me judge, but for clarification, I was wondering ... who has it better than us?"

Before the judge could respond, Harbaugh replied,

"I know the answer to that...Nobody!"

There's a 50% chance that guy has a username.

On the Go Blue Guarantee. Michigan has declared that instate students with family incomes of less than 65k a year will no longer pay tuition. This is a good thing. Maybe it's less of a "whoah" moment than it first appears since Michigan was already paying the bulk of costs for students in this income bracket, but taking it to zero means something. It also drops out a bunch of paperwork:

"The 'Go Blue Guarantee' cuts through the complexities of financial aid to help us reach talented students from all communities in our state. I have always believed that talent is ubiquitous in our society, but opportunity most certainly is not. The 'Go Blue Guarantee' helps us ensure wider opportunity."

I have Read The Comments on this, unfortunately, and one of the most common attempted gotchas is weeping for the family making 66k. They're not exactly boned by this move:

Tuition slides up gradually as income increases. As it would in any non-insane system. Concerns about families making twice the state median having problems shouldering their burden should be mitigated by the existence of 529 plans, which allow folks who have money to invest—ie, 120k-per-year households—to grow that money tax-free. You have to have a plan, but you can afford to have one at that point.

As state appropriations have shrunk as a portion of Michigan's budget, Michigan has responded by continually increasing costs for the wealthy. They've also tried to up their appeal to that segment of the population. If anything it's worked too well; Michigan's ability to enroll lower-income students has fallen off a cliff. This will help. It is unlikely to have a huge impact since ability to meet admissions standards is highly correlated with family income.

There's not much of a sports angle here unless Michigan starts covering large chunks of living costs as well. Those are estimated at about 15k annually and are covered by an athletic scholarship elsewhere. Since the sort of families covered by the guarantee are also the ones for whom 15k is a huge deal, this does not get Michigan a bunch of free scholarships for instate kids. If Michigan manages to extend this to room and board, then you might see a notably improved class of walk-on. Until then hold your birdman dot gifs about gaming the system.

Athletic budget notes. Michigan continues to live in the black after late Brandon shenanigans, projecting a two million dollar surplus this year. Athletic department budgets being what they are, a tiny profit is all that will ever be allowed. This helps schools cry poor when amateurism is questioned. Michigan can't quite disguise why a good year for the AD is always a 1% profit margin, because the way they make this happen is a PR boon:

Included in the department's projections is an increase in transfers to the university from $3.825 million in FY17 to $7.875 million in FY18.

Does the athletic department need to double the amount of money they transfer back to the general fund? No. Does the general fund need a four million dollar drop in a swimming pool of funding? No.

Michigan's also setting aside four million dollars into its deferred maintenance fund. They need to do this for major renovations—they cannot soak taxpayers by issuing bonds like pro teams—but that is also money that exits that they expensed away with some handwaving. Michigan expects to make at least 14 million dollars profit in 17-18.

That's due in no small part to this:

Conference distributions are projected to increase to $51.1 million in FY18 from $36.3 million in FY17 due mostly to a new conference media rights agreement.

You might be able to pay the players now instead of coming up with increasingly transparent ways of laundering the money.

Get hype for Gary. Peppers kind of talk about Mr. Gary from Don Brown:

Brown was asked Saturday after Michigan’s high school football camps how good Gary, a defensive end, can be.

“Best I’ve ever seen,” Brown said. “Best I’ve ever seen combining speed, strength, change of direction, and the mental curve. He’s unbelievable. The sky is the limit.

“The good thing is I think he understands that there’s a lot on his shoulders.”

It is rare to hear that kind of thing from a coach, and it portends good things.

Other minor roster notes from recent coach availabilities: Grant Perry won't play until his court issue is resolved and Grant Newsome is still expected to redshirt.

It's a contract. The NCPA, an NCAA union with the minor problem of not having any officially-designated employees to unionize, is doing what it can in the current regulatory environment. They've introduced a binding contract that they say is kosher with the NCAA that covers various aspects of the player-school relationship not covered by the LOI. Highlights:

According to the contract document obtained by CBS Sports, the CAP Agreement can be used instead of the National Letter of Intent or with the NLI. Either way, it would cover several areas the letter of intent doesn't. …

A school could be bound to an all-encompassing transfer release for a prospect before enrollment. The document asks if an institution "agrees"  or "does not agree" "to comply with any request for transfer" and "to not restrict the ability" of a player to transfer to any other school. …

A school could not "cancel, reduce or fail to renew financial aid … due to injury or athletic performance." …

A player could negotiate the cost of a remaining scholarship to complete a degree at some point in the future should he/she leave early for a professional draft.

These things rarely get off the ground, unfortunately. High level players are deciding between competing under-the-table offers that supersede the relatively minor concerns this contract can cover, especially in basketball.

(Also, since I just rolled my eyes at Dennis Dodd I should point out that this is a good and interesting piece he got first.)

Da Coach D. I forgot that LSU hired Cajun Brady Hoke after running Les Miles out of town, and have been momentarily boggled by this once again. LSU has all the money in the world, and they hired an interim coach whose previous experience was crashing and burning at Ole Miss. Anyway, Orgeron is using the NCAA's new camp rules to shut the rest of the country out of Louisiana. Michigan canceled a scheduled camp of their own, but that pales in comparison to the hoops Texas has been trying to jump through:

This marks the third announced camp in Louisiana that Texas was scheduled to take part in. And it’s the third camp that LSU has worked hard behind the scenes to prevent from happening. In a phone interview earlier on Tuesday, the local high school coach who initially helped facilitate the field for the Baton Rouge camp expressed pessimism about it happening. “We're in LSU's backyard,” said Mike Roach, the coach at Madison Prep in Baton Rouge and the father of Texas player Malcolm Roach. “Louisiana home cooking may have played a part in it.”​ Roach, who initially tried to help facilitate the camp, declined to go into details on what LSU may have done to attempt to prevent the camp from being held at Memorial Stadium. But his comments proved to be prescient.

After camps affiliated with Texas got canceled at Louisiana College and Southeastern Louisiana in the past few weeks, Mumme acknowledged on Tuesday afternoon there was still a chance LSU or political officials in the state would attempt to thwart Texas’s presence. “Oh yeah,” Mumme said. “But it’s only a day away now. I don’t think there’s a lot they can do. The only thing that can kill it is if it rains.”

He was wrong.

A silly waste of time on their part, and one that does nothing to help anyone. It sucks most of all for the mid-level kids who might catch on at Cornell or Belhaven or wherever if they can just get in front of some coaches; top-level guys don't need and rarely work out at these satellite camps.

But Orgeron's mostly notable for being unintelligible, so that fits.

Somebody did it for me. Many thanks to the Crimson Quarry, which donned its fisking hat in response to this:

This saves me a couple hours of brow-furrowed typing. For real:

[Politi:] Big Ten rival Michigan

[CQ]: Ahh of course, that famous Rutger rival Michigan, against whom the games are always close.

This is a thing a person said and was paid for.

I do have assorted comments about the Rutgers thing three years in that will not reference the Politi column:

  • The huge uptick in dough raked in by the league is approximately zero percent Rutgers's doing. Rutgers was useful to Delany as he attempted to expand the Big Ten Network's footprint. The 15-million-dollar uplift this year is because of the Big Ten's new national contracts with FOX and ESPN. The Michigan-OSU game, which is on FOX for the first time this year, is a bigger reason for the uplift than every game Rutgers plays in every sport.
  • Rutgers is probably worth it in this brief window when they don't get a a full share and cable cutting has not been epidemic, which is all Jim Delany cares about since he's old and will never have any legacy other than dollar bills.
  • We should kick Rutgers out the instant they're supposed to get a full share.

Matt Brown addresses the elephant in the room for fans: we get zilch from the Big Ten's constant dollar chasing. We get less than that.

Does the difference between $51 million in conference payouts and $43 million in conference payouts change the fan experience, or even the trajectory of football or basketball programs in a meaningful way? It’s very hard to argue it does, especially if you’re a fan of an already rich program, like say, Ohio State.

Nobody gets a bowl invitation because they got the biggest conference check. There is no trophy for it. It’s a meaningless thing to brag about.

But the addition of Rutgers does impact the fan experience and day to day performance of football and basketball programs. It means fewer games between traditional opponents for your favorite teams. It means an RPI anchor in basketball and baseball. It means an expensive road trip. And it means a lot of unwatchable games.

Again, we should kick 'em out in three years just for the fun of it.

Oh okay. Sympathy for John Calipari is still reading zero:

"They need more inventory for their own network so you just play more league games and then you have more inventory for your network to put on," Calipari said via teleconference Tuesday. "Hopefully in our case in this league (the Southeastern Conference) we stay where we are and if we don't, we'll make it work."

"What you do is, you take away some of those kind of games that have been good to us," Calipari said. "North Carolina, for example: If they go to 20 games we won't have any more series with North Carolina, so I'm not for it."

Calipari cancelled the UK-Indiana rivalry because Indiana refused to play at a neutral site. He can pound rocks.

Some hockey recruiting stuff. Bob MacKenzie's annual poll of NHL scouts and GMs in the run-up to the draft is out. Incoming freshman Josh Norris is a late first round pick at #23; rising sophomore Luke Martin is #69, nicely slotted into the early third round. Michigan also picked up its first new commit of the Pearson era when Phillipe Lapointe jumped on board a couple days ago. Phillipe is former Red Wing Martin Lapointe's son

Etc.: Muckalt hire official. Hooray for (potential) (slight) changes in municipal bonds that would (hypothetically) make it tougher for billionaires to get public money for stadiums. All hail the double team.  Second string OSU TE out for season.

Oklahoma State's mascot is stranger than fiction. As college and NFL OL play diverges, busts become more common. Should be sent to all linemen considering M. Paris, London, and Normandy Beach on the docket next year. Obamas invited to be honorary captains. DJ made a good decision.



June 20th, 2017 at 2:53 PM ^

Knew Judge Kay Behm back from her days at UM Law during the Fab Five years.  She's a huge UM football fan and a damn nice lady who liked to refer to anything that's good as "top drawer."  Very pleased to see this news.


June 20th, 2017 at 2:56 PM ^

They cannot soak tax payers dry via bonds, but they certainly use debt financing via UofM bonds.  I was once in attendance during a discussion where Dave Brandon touted that it was nice to leverage the University's Aaa credit rating for athletic department needs.


June 20th, 2017 at 4:33 PM ^

There's real truth to this. The most cataclysmic moment in my memory of Michigan football prior to the Harbaugh era was The Catch in 1994. Capped off the loss of a two-score lead, torpedoed what had potential to be a national championship season, etc.

1997 happened and that lost was kind of washed away for me. Not that I'm totes cool with it now or anything, but the scar doesn't irritate. Three years after The Catch, we hammered the same team at home, Woodson won the Heisman, we won the national title. It was just a stumble on the path.

I guarantee you Alabama fans don't spend a lot of time griping about Dennis Franchione right now.


June 20th, 2017 at 3:16 PM ^

Over at Winging it in Motown, they had an article about draft bargains. Seems Norris is one of the best bargains for the top of the draft.


A Michigan commit, Josh Norris was the leading scorer for the USNTDP U18 team this year. One of the things that stands out about him is his skating. He has a long, powerful stride, and can reach high speeds quickly. He has a very good one-timer, and gets a very quick release on his shot. His vision and passing abilities are nothing to sneeze at either. The cherry on top of it all is the fact that, from what I’ve observed, he’s money in one-on-one situations like in the shootout. The only caveat, along with the next two prospects I will discuss below, is the incredibly small sample size of games he played for which I could quantify this data. He played less than 30 games in the USHL, and this data is based on that sample. There’s no telling if he would have been able to sustain this level of production had he played a larger sample of games. Nevertheless, Norris would probably be one of the best options available in the 2nd round.


June 20th, 2017 at 3:24 PM ^

is there a more complete explanation of what LSU/Orgeron is doing?  what's the mechanism by which he's convincing high schools to cancel camps in La.?  cutting the high school's students' acccess to LSU?


June 20th, 2017 at 3:29 PM ^

My understanding is that La has some incredibly complicated state politics and that LSU has outsized influence on lots of things. I read a comment on Reddit (I know) from someone who basically said HSes don't want to piss off LSU because it could be used against them when funding comes into play, especially if that school is considered part of LSU's recruiting "backyard".


June 20th, 2017 at 3:26 PM ^

Rutgers and Maryland are both random weird dudes no one knows who are inexplicably at your house party.  They're only there because some douchebag invited them.

Maryland is at least making attempts to socialize, acting somewhat normal and had the grace to bring its own beer.

Rutgers is the guy that showed up having already pissed his pants, is grinding on the rest of your party guests and being indignant when he finds out there's no Natty Light.

Guess which one gets bounced with extreme prejudice?


June 20th, 2017 at 3:51 PM ^

the increased revenue, I could actually see Rutgers wanting out of the conference as much as we want them out.  It just seems like a dead end for them.  They are never going to be competitive in football and really don't have the chance to develop any natural rivalries, etc. and is just going to be a perpetual doormat.  It just doesn't fit and it never will.  It is like a bad marriage that never even had good times to begin with.  Right now you are still seeing a little interest from their fan base because it is still kind of novel but you can only have so many "black outs" where you are ultimately humiliated before people just completely lose interest.


June 20th, 2017 at 5:41 PM ^

the money talks and the money they are making for being in the conference is a lot more then they will make anywhere else. Plus the prestige of being in the B1G is an additional draw.  I can't imagine them loosing interest. 

With the additional money they can probably start upgrading facilities and maybe improve enough to occassionally make a bowl game and have decent seasons in other sports. Isn't their Lacrosse team one of the better ones in the nation?



June 20th, 2017 at 3:35 PM ^

Was added not becuase any of the clearly stupid reasons already addressed, it was so the bigten brass could have their office in Manhattan instead of Chicago.


June 20th, 2017 at 3:49 PM ^

I wanted him to stay.  And he very rudely did not take my wishes into account when making his choice.  But it would be great to see him go at 22 as the link suggests.

As for the $65k cap, the problem with it is that it will make this country a communist dictatorship within a matter of months.  And we will all be working in sulphur mines and waiting in ten hour queues at the grocery store just so the clerk can punch us in the face.


June 20th, 2017 at 4:11 PM ^

A great many versions of this joke exist:

An old man in the USSR lines up for hours to buy meat, only to find out there's none left. He flies into a rage, screaming about how horrible and stupid communism is.

A KGB agent walks up to him and tells him to calm down, adding "don't forget what happened to people like you back in the old days" and making a "gun" shape with his hand.

The old man goes back to his apartment, empty-handed. His wife says, "They're out of meat?"

He replies, "it's worse than you think: they're out of bullets."


June 21st, 2017 at 2:04 AM ^

God, that take would've been hysterical if it didn't mirror so closely some of the comments we saw here and elsewhere!

I cannot fathom (well, so many things really) why someone's first, instinctive reaction is not to celebrate this but to condemn it.

To think not of historically disadvantaged people who may have their first legitimate shot of attending Michigan, but instead of theoretical people (who I'm guessing theoretically look like them) who may *just miss* the arbitrary cutoff.

Who go online, in public forums, to speculate whether these newly fortunate will satisfactorily appreciate and accept responsibilty for this opportunity.

There is indeed a "rift" in the populace, and it begins in the very brain pan of how we receive and process information. We could call it "left brain" vs "right brain"... not scientifically accurate, but as a metaphor, pretty spot on. 


MI Expat NY

June 20th, 2017 at 4:08 PM ^

I'm not sure I understand the critique of Calipari regarding on-campus vs. off-campus in the IU-UK series.  That series had a significant history of neutral site games (roughly 50% of all non-NCAA tournament matchups).  And, though not having been to one of the games in person, my impression on tv was that whether games were being played in Louisville or Indianapolis, they always had great atmoshperes.



June 20th, 2017 at 11:08 PM ^

The biggest problem about household incomes is that they are only a one year snap shot.  And worse, when it comes to financial aid it is last year's  snap shot not the current year's.  Incomes change year to year and most family's income will grow as the careers of the mother and father grow.  So to say that because you make 120K last year that you should have been planning and had a 529 account for the last 18 years is a big assumption and it some cases is a bad one.


For example my senior year of high school my father's company was bought and it resulted in a huge spike in his income that lasted only a single tax year.  Before and after we were right back to a respectable middle class income for a two working parent household with four children.  The negative example to that might be if one parent loses a job and now the household income plummets but financial aid only cares about last years income when it comes to ability to pay.  Both of these cases result in institutions thinking that your family should be able to pay more than they really can.  


June 20th, 2017 at 4:59 PM ^

“Best I’ve ever seen,” Brown said. “Best I’ve ever seen combining speed, strength, change of direction, and the mental curve. He’s unbelievable. The sky is the limit.

Gary's a beast, no question, but unless Brown's counting opponents, now would be the time to remember where we plucked this guy from.  It's a good bet Chris Wormley is the best SDE he'd coached yet (because Gary was a frosh), and after Gary, at distant third, some 2-star from Boston College.

I mean, that's kinda why we hired him -- what he did with what he had, nobody else does that.


June 20th, 2017 at 6:33 PM ^

"You can afford to at that point."  Any policy at all can be justified by this non-argument.  The opposite day George version of you is saying "Anyone can pay for their own college if they're willing to work hard enough for it."  Are they both true?  Only in a hilariously simplistic sense.  And only without context to those who are already nodding before the sentence is finished. 

The other guys are laughing too.  They're smug and lol'ing in their own echo chambers.  Both sides waving off any need for debate.