Unverified Voracity Buys Canned Goods

Submitted by Brian on April 4th, 2012 at 11:24 AM

BURKE ACK. Everyone's on alert after Sam Webb—previously confident—walked that back significantly last night on the premium Scout board. Rivals almost immediately provided a positive counterpoint but I think we all know who's had the better information over the last year or so. Dylan has "strong rumors on both sides of the coin." I'm stocking my bomb shelter.

Burke should hear an official word from the NBA advisory committee in two days. I haven't heard any analyst say he's a first rounder and the strong rumor I got said Burke wouldn't leave unless that's where he was projected; if that's the case we could get an announcement of a return shortly after. Once that date passes April 29th is the deadline. The April 10th date is meaningless.

This is wasting time I could be using buying canned goods.

This is cultural relevance. Via Matt Norlander and Jerry Hinnen, a curiosity left behind in the Kentucky locker room in the aftermath of their national championship:


It was probably inevitable that the end result of the Fab Five is the apotheosis of the one-and-done. Whether that's good or bad is in the eye of the beholder.

I WATCHED ALL-STAR HIGH SCHOOL BASKETBALL AND SURVIVED. It was a near thing, but I made it. Over the weekend I took in Mitch McGary and Glenn Robinson III playing in separate games of the ESPN something something classic something, and wondered why I was doing it. I can tell you these things:

  • Mitch McGary is tall, but not as tall as some other guys.
  • Glenn Robinson III can dunk very well…
  • …but had a rough day at the free throw line.

I cannot tell you anything else. Robinson does look like an NBA athlete, so… yeah. UMHoops gathered highlights. Here's Robinson:

Click through for McGary, who didn't look as good of a prospect in a barely-organized meaningless quasi-scrimmage that even the announcers regularly talked trash about. Hurrah for information.

Robinson looks like he'll be tough to keep off the court. After the game Dave Telep asserted that he and Sam Dekker were overlooked for the McDonald's game. It'll be interesting to see how the minutes shake out. Robinson says he's being looked at for the 2 and 3…

As far as next season goes, Robinson says he's currently putting in extra time on his 3-point shooting and his ball handling. He said the Michigan staff would like to use him as both a small forward and shooting guard next season, meaning he could be relied on to attack the rim off the dribble, distribute and score from deep.

…but I'm betting we see Michigan go with Robinson at the four for at least 15 minutes a game. That will depend on how Hardaway and Stauskas are playing and how comfortable Beilein is with a four who can't shoot threes.

Also a chic pick. Indiana is getting a lot of hype in everyone's way-too-early previews. Someone else getting hype: Michigan. Andy Katz:

8. Michigan

The Wolverines will be in the top 10 if Trey Burke returns to school. He should. He would join freshman stud Mitch McGary and Tim Hardaway Jr., and a loaded class that also includes ESPNU 100 recruits Glenn Robinson Jr., and Nik Stauskas. The Wolverines have had a few defections, and that has disrupted a bit of their flow. But John Beilein has figured out the Big Ten, so Michigan will once again be in the mix.

Not to be outdone is Terry Hutchens of the Indianapolis Star:

3. Michigan: Trey Burke is the big key here. If he stays in school, Michigan is loaded considering what it has back and the addition of players like Mitch McGary and Glenn Robinson III. If Burke leaves, I think Michigan slips a few notches here. Losing Douglass and Novak would be bigger if a guy like Burke doesn’t return.

CBS has Michigan #5. Yeesh. I know we're talking Big Expectations next year but a one-seed is not the peak of my personal expectations distribution.

Twosie, the story. The Daily tracks down the man who sold Taylor Lewan his tandem bike:

Hakken asks Lewan where the coeds are going to sit, as he rides around with his friends. Tandem bikes are, after all, romantic.

“No girls are going to ride my twosie,” Lewan says, incredulously, and Hakken laughs again. He's never heard anyone call a tandem that before, but he chooses not to correct Lewan, who makes it clear he’s serious about buying the bike.

It's a story for the ages. In 2055 the most prestigious college football award will be the Taylor Lewan's Twosie, given to the best pair of starting tackles in the country.

Flufftasm. Not Michigan Replay is all "BCS Sugar Bowl champions but that's in the past," and MGoVideo has restored the rightful music that is right:

Reader Matt Stone points out that there's a (smoked) bubble screen around 8:52. Either way that's good—Michigan couldn't defend it at all last year, and never ran it in an effort to loosen up defenses.

Check out the segment on Michigan replacing Molk and Martin if only to hear Ricky Barnum pronounce hungry "hawngry." #doyouspeakflorida.

Talking to Al. I watched about an hour of this at the Glazier Clinic I went to and could have happily done another four:

"He invited me into a room…"

/cocks eyebrow

"…the film room."

Ohhhh oh. Oh. Carry on. Michigan Replay should be an hour of this every week. Two.

Overcoming tragedy, he selected extra value meal #3. If Elliott Mealer does end up winning the left guard job, you can ink the inevitable Tom Rinaldi feature in double-underlined ink. I just wonder if he'd like to be Elliott Mealer at this point instead of Overcoming Tragedy Elliott Mealer. Example AA.com headline:

Elliott Mealer overcomes tragedy, becomes leading candidate for starting spot on Michigan's offensive line

Maybe Elliott Mealer wants to be Guy With Mountain Man Beard instead.

Meanwhile, Brock update:

He continues to work out with Barwis three times per week, commuting from Ohio to BarwisMethods in Plymouth, and can now take 23 steps without any kind of support -- canes included.

A weakness! A palpable weakness! Alabama is moving Australian JUCO transfer Jesse Williams from defensive end to nose tackle, where surely he'll be an exploitable liabilit—


Dammit. Why are we playing a team with an entire extra recruiting class to sift through again?

Etc.: If Derrick Nix misses one minute against a real opponent this year for getting arrested for pot I'll eat… well, I'll be surprised. Unless he's got a couple of secret strikes already this will blow over before fall.

M has acquired its Sugar Bowl bling. Point of order: Michigan fans aren't "misinterpreting" Advice Columnist Mark Hollis's Burke-directed tweet. We know it's harmless greeting-card advice. We are mocking Hollis for being a 12-year-old who likes Twilight.



April 4th, 2012 at 11:49 AM ^

have you use such big words like, "Apotheosis"

Not sure if I'm honored or insulted by the Fab Five reference in the UK locker room.  Speaking of, everytime that comes on ESPN I'm unable to watch anything else.


April 4th, 2012 at 11:50 AM ^

Oh boy the things that come to mind when a "probably-illegally-boostered-slash-recruited" Kentucky team is referencing THAT Michigan team. Can you say ALL THE VACATED FINAL FOUR APPEARANCES. 


Calipari is still slimier than slime. 


April 4th, 2012 at 12:01 PM ^

i wish i could see where he is pointing better, but the whole thing is enthralling. i never considered that the point where denard is most dangerous is in the yard behind the line of scrimmage because at this point the downfield WRs are still a threat. as soon as denard crosses the LOS, the dbs can react and converge.

also, the font for the painted wolf quote on the wall behind borges is attrocious. looks like something you would see at your aunt's coffee shop that will be closed in a month that she opened with your uncle's life insurance money after so many years of putting food on his table and now it is her time.


April 4th, 2012 at 12:19 PM ^

Why are we playing a team with an entire extra recruiting class to sift through again?

Because the B1G & Jim Delaney have declared that the rivalry with OSU is a protected crossover and will be played at the end of . . . oh wait, oops, that's the other school with extra recruiting on the schedule next season. 


April 4th, 2012 at 12:20 PM ^

Yesterday Brian said we'd probably squeak into the tournament even if Burke leaves.  I'm sorry, but I couldn't disagree more.....unless we sign a true PG at the last minute.

Last year we played a rotation consisting of 6.5 people (Vogrich gets the 0.5).  We would have lost 4 of those 6.5 players in Stu, Zach, Evan, and Trey.  The only returning guys would be Hardaway coming off a frustraing year and Morgan, who is almost entirely reliant on the PG to add any value offensively. 

We'd replace those four guys with three true freshmen, Jon Horford, and Max Bielfeldt.  Essentially you're replacing four guard/wing players with three post players, a tweener forward who is athletic but can't shoot, and a combo guard. 

That sounds like an NIT team to me without additional immediate contributors at the guard spot. 


April 4th, 2012 at 12:24 PM ^

How are we going to (maybe) lose a guy with a clear second round grade for the third straight year?  Is this a chronic problem for JB?  Doesn't seem like non-first rounders are leaving at our peer programs.


April 4th, 2012 at 12:25 PM ^

This Kentucky team would have been housed by that Michigan team, but whatever.  If they are still champions in 5 years, I'd be amazed.

I cannot imagine Burke going pro because I've yet to see anyone calling him a 1st rounder outside of a random board here or there where he's the 4th PG taken in the late first.  So I have to imagine he'll stay.

"No girls are going to ride my twosie"

/ Inappropriate poop joke

// Deadspin commenter snark

/// Still pretty awesome


April 4th, 2012 at 12:34 PM ^

I don't know about that.  Jalen>Lamb, but they might be better at every other position.  And they actually won the title, as opposed to the Fab Five, who as freshmen were crushed by an (admittedly great) Duke team.

As much as I love the FF, I think Kentucky is better.


April 4th, 2012 at 12:51 PM ^

We'll see after a number of NBA years. But who's their Howard?

Winning the title is nice, but the competition isn't the same. This Kansas team isn't really any better (maybe worse) than the Kansas team that the FF and NC ran out of the gym in '92-93.  And that two seed was the best team they played in the Tournament.  The better question might be - could this Kentucky team beat the Kentucky team in '93?

I'll say this for them..U-K was the most stacked team we've had in college basketball in a long while. They're the only one in recent memory who could hang with the great teams of the 80's and early 90's. Because every other champ in recent memory would have gotten smoked.


April 4th, 2012 at 12:53 PM ^

Was Kansas really all that great this year though? Outside of Thomas Robinson they don't really have any elite players. Maybe it's just my opinion, but I think the Fab Five would have steamrolled Kansas, and would have solidly beaten Kentucky


April 4th, 2012 at 12:53 PM ^

Not sure I took away "one and done" from the Fab Five reference, rather that even a stacked team of talent can lose the championship (twice) without teamwork, smart play and defense. More a "learn from history" lesson in my eyes.


April 7th, 2012 at 7:13 PM ^

Run it up the middle with Fitz every single play please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!