Last Days Of Disco

Submitted by Brian on September 10th, 2012 at 12:11 PM

9/8/2012 – Michigan 31, Air Force 25 – 1-1



It's been a long time since the first game of Michigan's football season wasn't at home. It was 1998. Michigan headed to South Bend to get annihilated by Autry Denson and the option in the opening game of their title defense. The box score lo these many years later is horrific:

                      Michigan  Notre Dame 
First downs                  24          19 
Rushed-yards             38-150      55-280 
Passing yards               322          96 
Sacked-yards lost          3-29         0-0 
Return yards                  6          14 
Passes                  28-44-0      4-10-1 
Punts                    2-31.0      2-44.0 
Penalties-yards            4-30        5-32 
Time of possession        29:46       30:14 

Michigan led 13-9 before four straight ND touchdowns turned it into a laugher. Michigan got blown out despite outgaining the opponent by 100 yards and allowing the opposition to complete all of four passes. They fumbled all of the balls. They stopped none of the options. That game was 36-13 before Michigan tacked on a cosmetic touchdown at the end.

This was the Michigan-ND rivalry in the 90s. If all you know about it is 38-0, "oh, wide open," and Michigan ripping Irish hearts out in the last 30 seconds, you are fortunate. I know better because I was in college then.

The next week I sat, despondent, in the student section as a group of resilient (and probably drunk) guys in front of me chanted "Cross is Boss" in the waning minutes of Michigan making a blowout loss to Donovan McNabb and Syracuse look pretty on the scoreboard. Donovan McNabb was in college once. I said it was a long time ago.

Walter Cross went over 100 yards that day, all of it racked up long after the game had been decided. Syracuse, too, had murdered us with the option.


Saturday started strangely blank. I wrote this thing two years ago about the opening of football season that I already kind of wrote back when far fewer people were reading this blog and have to force myself not to write again every Friday before Michigan starts playing football again:

I can say that most of the time I like that I find football important. It gives life a rhythm. I think my favorite part happens on the first day of the new year, when I file into the stadium an hour early. It's still mostly empty then. You can spread out in the sun. In my mental picture of this my seats are high up in the corner so I can take in the whole vast breadth of the stadium. Perched there, looking down and across, the future stretches out across the horizon. Anything seems possible, and the wait is over.

I hadn't felt a lack of possibilities since 1998, when Michigan was not going to repeat as national champions even before Donovan McNabb showed up. I went in at the usual time and sat in the usual spot and felt… not that. It turns out getting hammered 41-14 in your opening game restricts dreams of future glories quite a bit. It's like having New Year's Day on the eighth, a week after you found out you're not getting a promotion. You found this out because your boss stapled it to a bobcat he mailed to you. The stitches still itch.

So when the band rolled out, it was weird. I did the thing with the clapping and the raising of the fist. The voice in the head that has been going ermagerd fortbaw ermagerddddd the last 13 years was not there. Alabama had taken it, ripped its pigtails out, stomped on it, and returned it to me. They said "what?" confrontationally. They asked if I was going 7958871928_ab4580a5a5_z[1]to do anything about it. I said "no, sir." It sat in the corner, petting itself, maybe whispering ermagerd fortbaw, maybe not. It was hard to make out.

Two plays later, Denard Robinson ripped through the line, cut directly towards me, and was one on one with a safety with an angle. An angle and no chance in hell. Turbo was engaged, and Denard shot into space with the same breathtaking speed he showed after fumbling a his first snap against Western Michigan.

ermagerd ermagerd ermagerddddddd

On the first play of the second half, Denard ran 50 yards in one shoe, making a cut on his sock.



sydn3[1]Cross (@ right via MDS) was a freshman that year. He must have thought a hundred yards in his second college game was a hell of a start. Must have thought he would be watching other guys take the meaningless carries pretty soon. But Cross never cracked a hundred yards again. He'd only match the ten carries he had against the Orangemen three more times. Once a year Michigan would blow the doors off the worst team in the Big Ten; Cross would dust himself off to pick up 40 or 50 yards as the stadium emptied and walk-ons made their moms proud.

I liked him, though. I remembered Cross Is Boss whenever he'd hit the field, and how those deranged guys in front of me were taking whatever they could from the game in front of them. If the only thing it offered was an opportunity to ironically root for some guy to rack up more meaningless yards than had ever been gained by a guy in a winged helmet, that's what they were going to do. I was still sitting on those seats as Michigan fell to 0-2, but I was less despondent. Cross was boss. If those guys could be okay with life, I could maybe be too.

So, yeah, Michigan's definitively not elite. The defense got torn up by a triple option team, and the offense got stoned against Alabama, and I guess I'll be okay with that, because if some dudes in 1998 can carve some fandom out of Walter Cross, how can you not be excited about Denard Robinson's final games in Michigan Stadium?

Fortbaw. Let's get it.


Via mgovideo:

Eric's photoset:

Things That Still Aren't Bullets

brady-hoke-epic-double-point_3BRADY HOKE EPIC DOUBLE POINT OF THE WEEK. Denard, obviously. More total yardage than your team gets is an auto-win.

Honorable mention: Funchess, Gardner, Joe Bolden, James Ross, Jake Ryan(?).


1: Denard Robinson (Air Force), Jeremy Gallon (retroactively awarded for Alabama game).

Welcome, freshmen. Not really. Hey, remember when this was finally the year when Michigan didn't rely on freshmen all over the place? Yeah… nyet. Michigan rolled out not one but two true freshman ILBs (James Ross and Joe Bolden) on Air Force's penultimate drive—the last one they actually used their offense on. Hoke would later say Bolden played so much because Colerain, his high school, ran the option, but even so… man.

Meanwhile, Ondre Pipkins, Mario Ojemudia, and Keith Heitzman (a redshirt freshman) saw plenty of time on the defensive line and Jarrod Wilson was the guy who came in when Michigan went to nickel. You make shake your fist at Rodriguez's last couple of recruiting classes now.

It wasn't that bad on offense, where the only freshmen to get a lot of playing time were AJ Williams and Devin Funchess. The former is like okay, we'll deal, and the latter was going to play early on damn near any team in the country.

Speaking of…


not having shoes is the coolest now (Upchurch)

FUNCHESS. I try not to get all I told you so because I have occasionally not been right about things—like those three solid years when I thought Rodriguez was going to work out—but dang I told you so. Not that this is any great scouting feat on my part. Pretty much everyone who went to that open practice and saw a 6'5" guy with freaky long arms getting sent deep on wheel routes thought "holy crap" to himself and wrote about it on the internet.

I'm not sure if it was wheel one, wheel two, or not-a-waggle deep bomb that was the turning point, but by the time it was over Funchess had 106 yards receiving and was the first guy out of everyone's mouths in the postgame. It doesn't take a keen eye to think that guy has potential.

In Funchess we saw the beginnings of Michigan's Swiss Army Offense. They lined him up as an H-back and sent him on a wheel against a linebacker, who had no chance because he was too slow. They sent him deep against a safety, who had no chance because he was too small. That's the stuff Borges has spent years doing instead of figuring out how to tweak a read option, and in Funchess we saw the future.

Also the present.

image_thumb91[1]…and introducing Chasing Jim Mandich. Is this too early? No. For one, I'd rather put up pictures of Bo and Mandich 20 times than, like, four. For two, it's the internet. This is how we do. Suck it, guy on twitter who told me to calm down and that it was just one game. WOO!

Jim Mandich is Michigan's all-time tight end receiving yardage leader with 1494 yards. After posting Michigan's first 100-yard receiving day by a tight end since Jerame Tuman did it in 1997, Devin Funchess has 106 yards receiving and needs 1389 to pass Mandich. At his current pace he needs just over 26 more games to do so.

That was the best thing, now the worst thing. Fitzgerald Toussaint: eight carries, seven yards. Commence offensive line panic. Do not hold any in reserve. If you end up in a cornfield wearing nothing but a traffic cone holding a sign that says "AIR FORCE DEFENSIVE LINEMEN ARE 260 POUNDS," this is about right, give or take a jockstrap.

I don't know, man. Live I didn't see anything Toussaint could have done except collapse in a pile of bodies. When Carl Grapentine forgot to turn off his mic and told the stadium "they can't do anything with that" after Michigan set another down on fire by running from under center, he was only telling everyone in the stadium what they were already thinking. Most of those plays went right, we're already nervous about Schofield… conclusion… yeah.

NORFLEET. hey drew dileo what's up you're all catching this ball wrong yoinkkkkkkk now I'm going to run over here bad idea getting tackled bouncing back not getting tackled running back over here different way different direction funnnnnnnnn I am the NORFLEEET zip that was like two guys oops here's like three guys awwwwww now I'm on the ground oh drew dileo you look sad let me apologize I am the NORFLEET this kind of thing just happens sometimes go with the flowwwwwwwwwwww

Denard accuracy. Seemed pretty good, right? The interception was zinged too hard—I'll give him a pass on the "high" bit because Vincent Smith—and the third down Gardner catch-that-wasn't was short. But those are MAs in UFR jargon, and if you put college football in your head all Saturday you'll see plenty of quarterbacks make similar errors. The only throws into coverage were a couple at the end of the half when you may as well force it.

I've seen some complaints about Denard not seeing open guys. I'll check for that as far as is possible given the tape, but if the costs of the Borges transition are an inability to make tiny run game adjustments the payoff tentatively appears to be an ability to put the ball where Denard wants it to be, most of the time.

It helps when you're throwing to Funchess and Gardner, too. The Funchess touchdown was short, but given the target that's what you want to do. As long as that guy is jumping for the ball it doesn't matter that you made him slow up, because he's winning that battle every time.

Crazy enough to work? Air Force's combination of triple option with Oregon's tempo and a pro-style-esque formation blizzard was fun to watch in the same way Nebraska's double pitch was last year… except it was far less fun because instead of one seemingly indefensible play it was dozens of probably defensible ones that weren't.

Q: think that could work at a major college level? Georgia Tech is doing it in the ACC, yes, but I think the option + jet tempo combo would be absolute hell to play against if the guys getting the ball were Denards and Norfleets instead of 5'7" academy guys. It was kind of hell to play against even against guys who are going pro in blowing things up. You're getting gashed, you have to substitute to keep guys fresh, you are freaking out and guaranteed to let some guy run free for a 70-yard score…


worst waldo. Upchurch

…unless he bobbles the ball and falls over.

Maybe it wouldn't work against Alabama but pair that Air Force offense, personnel and all, with a quality defense and you're winning nine games in the Big Ten. Falcon total offense against BCS-ish foes the last three years:

  • 2012 Michigan: 417
  • 2011 ND: 565
  • 2011 TCU: 416
  • 2010 Oklahoma: 458
  • 2010 TCU: 231
  • 2010 Utah: 411
  • 2010 GT: 287 (in a 14-7 win)

So unless you also run a flexbone triple option or are the 13-0 2010 TCU team that finished first in total and scoring defense and won the Rose Bowl by holding Wisconsin to 19 points (on 385 yards, FWIW), Air Force is going up and down the field on you.

You'd need a lot of breathing room to get that up and going, granted. Troy Calhoun just tweaked the thing Fisher DeBerry had been doing for decades. Implementing it from scratch would be painful at first, but if you're an Illinois or Minnesota or Rutgers or Cal, it might be worth a shot. I'd loathe it if Minnesota gradually became Air Force++ and Michigan had to deal with it annually. Therefore someone should try it.

Calhoun's just 46. If someone can pry him away from his alma mater, I promise to praise that coaching hire up and down. He even releases his Coaches' Poll ballot weekly.

Does that make you feel better? Those ND/TCU/Oklahoma numbers are just like ours. ND finished last year 30th in total D, 18th FEI. TCU was 32nd, 42nd FEI (schedule issues). Oklahoma was 53rd, but a shocking 4th(!) in FEI.

FEI has Air Force's offense 33rd and 32nd in 2010 and 2011, respectively. Last year's mark was better than Georgia, VT, Michigan State, Iowa, Auburn, and Florida State. With guys who are going pro in going Mach 3. This just happens when you sign Air Force up, even when you don't do it the week after playing Alabama.

"No, not really" -you. I hear you. All the rotation and getting zero out of the defensive line and freshmen and etc. What if I bring up last year's game #2 against Eastern Michigan?


We had all of those happen on Saturday. Nowadays "non-Martin" DTs are all of them, so expand that slice of the pie. The coaches worked some things out. They've got a virtual bye next week against UMass, so they'll have two weeks to prep for Notre Dame—this time State takes the bullet and we get the rebound.

I'm hoping we see some progress against the Irish, who couldn't run at all against Purdue and got Everett Golson sacked five times. Yeah, no Cierre Wood, but Purdue's rush defense was appalling last year.

It doesn't look good but hold out a couple weeks before hitting the panic button.

Also, Alabama couldn't run on WKU. LA LA LA NOT LISTENING

Marmot, city. I've heard from a number of people that Air Force mistimed a lot of their plays and ended up having Arena-style guys running at the line of scrimmage before several plays. Here's TTB:

The officials were terrible. Terrible. Air Force's first touchdown should have been called back for illegal procedure.  Quarterback Connor Dietz tossed to A-back Cody Getz, who beat everyone to the edge.  In the meantime, the wing started moving forward  prior to the snap like he was in the CFL and chopped down safety Jordan Kovacs, who was responsible for the pitch.  Without that forward momentum, Kovacs - Michigan's best open-field tackler - very well could have stopped Getz before the goal line.  Later in the game, Air Force converted on a key third down when both the quarterback and the running back - who were in a shotgun formation - started moving to their right before the ball was snapped . . . and a slot receiver was already in motion.  So three  guys were moving prior to the snap, and the play was allowed to stand.  Those were obvious, blatant non-calls and each one could have had a significant impact on the outcome of the game.

It was hard to tell if that was the case from my vantage point, but the refs did miss a really blatant illegal motion on an AF third and long conversion late. They had a guy moving, and the tailback took off before the snap, and no one noticed. I know they're military, but this is not 'Nam. There are rules.

Adventures in Special K. One: no "In The Big House." That is also two through six hundred. NO POP EVIL~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!atatatat.percentsign.asterisk.

Given how much they ran that into the ground last year, that's either a sign of that thing's merciful departure from our world or Special K's greatest ever troll. I wouldn't put it past him, the scourge.

Instead, Special K put on that Flo Rida song that is not at all about blowjobs, wink wink nudge nudge:

Is that the kind of thing we want to be exposing the youth to? The guy is seen using a Windows phone in that video.

Injuries. Brennen Beyer has a "knee strain" according to Hoke, which means he has anything from a fairy tickling his patella to a Turkmeni flaming crater where his knee used to be. Other than that, Michigan didn't get it too hard from all the cut blocks. Ash's issue seems like a one-week thing, and no one else is publicly injured.

Helmet numbers. I don't miss them.

Paging 2011 Jeremy Gallon. 2010 Jeremy Gallon has started returning punts again. Please report to the maize and blue courtesy phone.

Number stuff. The first Kovacs bullet has been dodged, and I think if they were going to give him someone else's number they would have done it right away. They probably aren't changing a senior captain's number in their second or third opportunity to do so. So, hurrah. Ryan's as good a choice as any, but I was hoping they'd put it on a receiver since Oosterbaan was famous for catching Bennie Friedman's passes and 47 is a distinctive number for a wideout.

Ron Kramer's 87 is next. Hopefully that ends up on a tight end. I'm rooting for Not Funchess because 19 is not a number I have strong associations with yet.


Inside The Box Score:

Air Force didn’t turn the ball over, but they only went 2 for 5 on fourth down. They missed a field goal, and were stopped on a fake field goal. That’s six points. That’s the margin of victory. Ugh.

Hoke For Tomorrow:

Michigan missed chances to get off the field, giving up frustrating first downs on third and medium-to-long time and again.  Brady Hoke missed a great chance at points to end the first half with some terrible clock management, ending up with a TO in his pocket. With Michigan up 14-3, Vincent Smith missed a chance to extend Michigan's drive and possibly their lead by tipping an accurate third-down pass from Denard up for an easy interception; Air Force would score a TD and keep it close for the rest of the game.


Photos and such. Galleries from Maize and Blue Nation


Media with the main and the stream and the Theo. Funchess named freshman of the week, Denard offensive player of the week by Big Ten. Denard Robinson had more total offense than Michigan did. Michigan up to 17th in the AP. Devin Gardner's still a quarterback in his mind. Give it four more games. Also the media refuses to call people by their last names. That's what they're for! They're names!


Michigan struggled early against Western Michigan and especially Notre Dame, and wasn't exactly pretty against Eastern Michigan. But it improved.

It shut down San Diego State the following week, then shut out Minnesota the one after that, and the Wolverines were in business.

The key to that success was simply getting better every week, especially on the defensive line, and Hoke sees the same thing happening this year.

"I would say there's a uniqueness to the offense, and the schemes -- but at the same time, we're a work in progress," Hoke said. "Quinton Washington is getting better every time he plays. Ondre Pipkins is getting better every time he plays. Keith Heitzman ... Mario Ojemudia ... Frank Clark, having him back.

"We're a work in progress."

Meinke also gives Toussaint a D+, which come on man that guy could have been Barry Sanders and gotten 15 yards on those attempts. BOO THIS MAN. Also, this may be a typo or it may be that DENNIS NORFLEET IS TOO FAST FOR VERBS

Dennis Norfleet is who we that he was



So there's your answer, Michigan fans.

Denard Robinson still is Denard Robinson. And so are the Wolverines.

On days like this, that'll be enough. Just barely enough, maybe, but Robinson, with a little help from his friends, did manage to beat Air Force, 31-25, before a crowd of 112,522 in the home opener at Michigan Stadium.

A week after getting thumped by top-ranked Alabama (then No. 2), the Wolverines needed a late fourth-quarter stop Saturday to avert an even bigger disaster. And they needed every bit of Robinson's dual-threat ability, as the senior quarterback actually managed to account for 101 percent of Michigan's offense.

Holy crap:

With 208 passing yards, Robinson is now just 12 yards behind ex-Michigan great Tom Brady for sixth on the school's all-time passing yardage list. Brady had 5,351 career passing yards as a Wolverine.

Brady only started two years, but even so…

Larry Lage gets in another holy crap:

He had his fourth game with at least 200 yards rushing and trails only Mike Hart's school record by one. His 426 yards of total offense ranked fifth in school history, trailing four of his own performances.

Blogz! The flyover:

MVictors has some bullets:

The two Devins:  Added to the postgame press conference hall of shame was the fiascoThe Devins around the media trying to figure out how to address individual questions to Devin Gardner or Devin Funchess,  as the Two Devins were trotted out to meet the press at the same time. The Wolverine’s Michael Spath asked the first question and intentionally addressed the question to “Devin” as a joke, but that didn’t help matters.   More than a few times the players had to ask for clarification as to whom the question was addressed and it got silly.  “The old one,” was offered up at one point to clear up the confusion, making Gardner, who was trying to be a bit stoic, crack up. Props to WTKA’s Steve Clarke who directed the final question to “Number nineteen”. I was going to direct mine to “number square root of 144”.

No one asked why they love bucket hats. Get with the program, media. Get with the program, Heiko.

MVictors also has helmet stickers Hoover Street Rag:

Air Force looked exactly like I would want to see a group of my nation's future military leaders look like as a football team, disciplined, focused, moving quickly, attacking the enemy's weaknesses, and fighting to the last man. They gave Michigan all they could handle and earned the respect and admiration of hopefully every Michigan fan. I had joked earlier in the week that "It's hard playing against Air Force because you can't boo freedom*", but I stand by it. Air Force, along with Army and Navy, are America's teams. Every one of those players made the choice to not only become an officer by going the Academy route. Every one of them has taken on the additional responsibility of being a football player at the Division I level, above and beyond what is asked of them. It was the same reason that I found it so hard to be angry when Air Force beat Michigan in the opening round of the NCAA Hockey Tournament in 2009. The cadets did an outstanding job and I am proud of their service to our country.

I agree with all of that save the "hard to get angry after the 2009 Air Force hockey game."

Holdin' the Rope surveys the Big Ten. Surprise! It's not good. Other game takes from Holdin' the Rope again, Tremendous, BWS, Maize and Brew, and Maize and Blue Nation.



September 10th, 2012 at 3:03 PM ^

I listened to the game on the radio and Beckman and Brandy were going nuts on this play.  I later watched on replay (not knowing/recalling what play this was) and it jumped out at me.  Terrible. 


The defensive holding calls on BWC were also laughable. 

coastal blue

September 10th, 2012 at 1:10 PM ^

In regards to Alabama not running on WKU (31 carries, 103 yards):

I just read the PBP. 

If you take away sacks (6 for 48 yards), Alabama had 25 carries for 151 yards or 6.0 yards a carry. 

Now if you have qualms as to how WKU got six sacks, thats fair, but I think its gotta be said that Alabama probably wasn't nearly as hyped up to play the Hilltoppers as they were us and weren't nearly as sharp. 

I wouldn't use this game as a reference point in regards to our season


September 10th, 2012 at 1:23 PM ^

Don't know why.  None of it is original

But some teams are going to have success stopping Alabama's run game.  We shouldn't fret every time that happens.  It's not like Indiana thowing everywhere at will and we thought that QB was going to be an NFL draft choice.

We were down 3 or 4 TDs before we knew what was going on in that game.  When momentum swings that badly, and you're legitimately getting your ass handed to you, things cycle and multiply.  You start thinking "we're getting killed!", "we can't stop anything!", "nothing's working!" in your head.  The other team is thinking the opposite, and it becomes a self-fulfilling thing.  The only good thing about the D in the UA game was that they didn't quit.


September 10th, 2012 at 1:15 PM ^

The Air Force players were moving towards the line all day.  In fact, it almost seemed to me like their thinking was "Hell...if they're not going to call it....push it a bit further" as they seemed to get more and more advance movement as the game wore on.

I certainly hope Hoke or whoever is responsible sends tape of the game to whoever is in charge of these officials to remind them that while Ann Arbor may be up north, we're not in Alberta, and players have to be set (or ONE running horizontaly) prior to the snap.

matty blue

September 10th, 2012 at 1:24 PM ^

great column, as always...

  • ah, yes, walter cross.  i don't know why i know this, but his buddies called him '8-ball', which i always thought was one of the cooler nicknames out there.
  • i don't know about the officiating being terrible in general, but i thought i must have been imagining the illegal motion...i seemed to be the only person bitching about it, in any case...which is not unusual, but still.  also, what was up with the two (three?) defensive holding calls on will campbell?  as far as i could tell, he must have been holding while laying on the ground.  which is where he spent most of his day.
  • the first-half timeout thing was a complete clusterfuck - we burned over ten seconds twice at midfield in the last minute.  when we finally called one it got a derisive 'cheer' in my section, which is pretty unsual for this regime.


September 10th, 2012 at 1:49 PM ^

I am guessing that the coaches told Campbell to tackle the fullback on every dive but if you actually tackle him and then don't let him up, it is holding because the fullback is an eligible receiver. Those penalties pissed me off too.


September 10th, 2012 at 2:22 PM ^

Everyone in my section was going NUTS during several of the blatant illegal motion plays.  AF's last TD occured right in front of me (section 4) and everyone in my area was in a state of disbelief that a penalty was not called.

You were definitely not the only one griping about poor officiating.


September 10th, 2012 at 2:27 PM ^

was giving the end-of-half time management a fairly resounding bronx cheer, too.  That was ugly.

The guy next to me was screaming "illegal motion" on every AF snap.  From my vantage point, it wasn't necessarily clear that the motion wasn't lateral, but something looked funny, I'll admit.


September 10th, 2012 at 2:27 PM ^

I don't know what happened on the first holding call, but the second one Campbell was doubled by the C and LG (I believe it was the LG).  The C went directly for his legs while Campbell was still engaged with the LG.  This should have been called an "illegal chop block".  This action caused Campbell to lose his balance and fall backwards.  While falling, Campbell grabbed the jersey of the LG and pulled him down to help break his fall.  While this technically is holding on Campbell, the correct call should have been a chop block on Air Force.  This is something they were doing all game. 


September 10th, 2012 at 1:30 PM ^

I believe NorFleet is actually a giant quickling. As such, all subsequent fake quotes should endeavor to drop the spaces between words, in addition to dropping the punctuation, to more accurately capture his speed of speech.







September 10th, 2012 at 1:31 PM ^

I've got to give DB credit for scheduling that game.  We could've played better, for sure, but it was a fun game.  I'm definitely in favor of playing one of the academies instead of a MAC school in the future. 


September 10th, 2012 at 1:43 PM ^

But really, everyone has been complaining not only about not having any big names teams other than Notre Dame, but also that instead of playing respectable teams we're playing MACrifices or Delaware State's.  So now we get a big boy who pounds us, and a decent squad instead of a cupcake who *SHOCKING* keeps it interesting, and there's a segment who are "WHY did we schedule these games.....!?!?!"

When obviously the only schedule that will make all fans happy is one where the top 2-13* teams are all played, in reverse order, and we win each game by no less than 60 points.

(*Michigan is of course, #1).

lexus larry

September 10th, 2012 at 2:19 PM ^

Might as well put this here...didn't want to "snowflake" the subject.

DB insists that the cumulative Athletic Department MARKETING PROWESS indicated that scheduling a rematch with Appalachian State was intended to keep the Michigan brand in the spotlight.  Well, he didn't need to do that to keep Michigan/Appy State there...during WWL's recaps of Saturday's ULM/Arkansas game, how many references to both The Horror®  and Virginia losing to W&M occurred?  Point being, whenever a stunner of an upset of very large proportions occurs, The Horror®  invariably is referenced, thus achieving DB's "Future."

Which he creates, on a near-daily basis...

(Almost as bad as Kordell Stewart and the Victory Jets "Pontiac - Game Changing Performance" contest clip replayed over, and over, and OVER again!  Until a few years ago, anyways.)


September 10th, 2012 at 3:46 PM ^

But I'd like to add that I don't see complaining about Appy State as the same thing as not wanting/wanting to play AF/Bama.  There are outside factors that make that different. And while I don't see going over the top about it, there's a reasonable argument to be made that scheduling interesting teams doesn't have to involved the likes of them.

It was more directed at those people who call or post and complain "why would we schedule Air Force right after Bama?! How stupid!"  It's one step away from those who want us to only place "interesting" games, but are the first to complain when we don't win all those interesting games and aren't competiting for a national title every year.  There are a few who want to take on all comers, and are willing to deal with some losses in return; but not the majority.  


September 10th, 2012 at 1:33 PM ^

"They've got a virtual bye next week against UMass, so they'll have two weeks to prep for Notre Dame—this time State takes the bullet and we get the rebound."

I expect a large helping of "Vanilla" with a lot of backups by the third this weekend.

ND has played MSU the week after UM since 1980(when they played each other). 1997 was the only time ND played UM after MSU. (there have been a few years were Purdue was sandwiched between)

Uncharted territory with ND/MSU.


September 10th, 2012 at 2:22 PM ^

... the third drive, right?  Not the 3rd Quarter, because UMass is a Delaware St.-level of cupcakery.  Even UMass 2010 would kick this UMass team's umass.  I'd expect starters get rotated out by the end of the 1st Quarter or very shortly thereafter.


September 10th, 2012 at 1:38 PM ^

I felt the same thing you did, Brian, though for different reasons. Work, life, having kids and the crushing Alabama defeat left me feeling the exactly the way you described.

I was on my couch, not in the stadium (get off my back, I'm 2500 miles away). I was wearing my t-shirt. My two year old son was beside me, cheering gamely for "Deenarr WOB-inson!" as the team stood on the sidelines before kickoff. (SoullessHack, Jr. refers to both #16 and the entire team as Denard Robinson... although any non-Denard player is "the guy.") It was nice. Nice. Not the gut-churning excitement I've felt every other year. But it was nice. I guess.

Then Denard made the MLB miss. I counted three steps straight upfield and said, calmly, "They're not going to get him. SoullessHack, Jr., though, jumped up on the couch and started screaming, "DENARR WOBINSON DENARR WOBINSON! RUNNING! RUN RUN RUN!" When they cut to the cheering crowd, SHJr took his cue began to clap and jump up and down.


Yeah, the defense probably stinks. The OL will be a continuing source of mysterious disappointment all season long. Borges will have to cobble together an offense from a grab bag of nonsense like freshmen TEs, converted QBs and that flea flicker play from Tecmo Super Bowl. But there's worse things than watching SHJr watch Denarr Wobinson will run so fast wiff the footbawl.


September 10th, 2012 at 1:39 PM ^

I have seen a few high schools starting to play with some triple option out of the pistol and to me this could work at the college level. Hell with our personnel this year it would be scary. Well could be I don't think denard is a good option qb, Just seems most of his reads are presnap


September 10th, 2012 at 1:46 PM ^

OK, so I admit that I haven't been watching the O-Line enough to tell if any of the freshman got in this week, but here is a list of the freshman that have lost redshirts thus far.


Dennis Norfleet (eeeeeeeeeee)

Devin Funchess

AJ Williams

Joe Bolden

James Ross

Mario Ojemudia

Ondre Pipkins

Jarrod Wilson


Did I miss anyone on the OL or special teams?  If not, that is a grand total of 8 burned redshirts, which to me seems low considering all the chatter about "OMG SO MANY FRESHMAN."  Or I suck at watching for players. 




September 10th, 2012 at 1:48 PM ^

I guess it was good to remind us of 1998 and how we could have had a "crash followed by a pratfall" beginning to 2012.  When AF got the ball back with about 6 mins. left, I couldn't help but reflect on how these are the games that Michigan typically turned into embarassing losses.  Hoke and Mattison + Jake Ryan and several freshman did not let that happen.  That's good.  No pratfall.  Brady has publicly blamed himself for not having the D line properly prepared for the 1998 season.  So, it worked out that he didn't let a bad 0-2 start happen again.  They rotated so many guys through plus they'll be able to do that again this week.  They ought to have a better picture as to who "the best 11" are to start on D for ND.

I heard the Grapetine comment over the PA and started laughing.  Several people near me looked at me like I just had a tourettes attack.

The music selections were a bit strange at times.  At least we didn't do Ten Nation Army 5000X per game like last year.  Thanks for embedding the Whistle video and informing me of its morally corrupt nature  Public service message received.


September 10th, 2012 at 1:56 PM ^

The 1998 game against Notre Dame does not wrap up what Michigan/Notre Dame was in the 90's (unless you're talking about us dominating the stats and coming out on the losing end.) 

In the 90's it was Notre Dame by 4, Michigan by 10, tie game, Notre Dame by 4, Michigan by 2, Michigan by 7 and Michigan by 4.  The 98 game was the only time the score got out of hand that decade.  Losing fumbles in the second half deep in our territory killed us just as much as the option did.  This was the year of never ending muffed punts by James Whitley as you will recall.  And pretty soon, other players were having the same problems.

The start of that year was the perfect example of our opponents having the game of their lives against us and then getting back to reality the following week. 

One week after Notre Dame killed us with the option, they traveled to play an 0-2 Sparty team that didn't even make a bowl game that year.  MSU led them 42-3 at the half before ND put on a couple scores in the second half to make the final score 45-23. 

And that Syracuse team led by Donovan McNabb went out 2 weeks later and got destroyed 38-17 by a 7-5 North Carolina State team. 

Teams are always going to be up for us and overachieve more often than not.  But I feel your pain about the option and how much trouble we have had with it. 


September 10th, 2012 at 1:53 PM ^

1998 was my first year out of college and I was somehow able to get seats in the student section for each game (read:  my girlfriend, then a senior, got them for me).  I just happened to be going through old Michigan gameday programs after our household move forced me to go through and get rid of old stuff when I discovered by ticket stubs from the 1998 season.  Section 24, row 18.  Face value of the tickets was like $35.  I sure wish the old days when tickets were so cheap!

But I too remember McNabb running wild and losing to ND but I'll never remember those seasons back in the 1990s as ever being disappointing.  Being able to be there in person is such a different experience than watching from home.  Something about being able to take out frustration by yelling instead of fuming at a stupid TV is cathartic.  Also, in this day and age, with all the information about recruiting and pre-season expectations, its hard not to get caught up in the hype and pre-season ranking and get upset over one loss to a team clearly better.  I can't help gobble up all the MGoInformation as you all but it definitely has an effect on my fanship (new word!) and how I mentally prepare for games.  The Information Age has even affected how we root for teams!


September 10th, 2012 at 2:15 PM ^

Damn, that's some fine writing.

Brian once said that he thought this site's calling card was the UFR.  That may be true for new folks, but what sets it apart and keeps us comming back is the writing.  If this site was nothing more than UFR's and charts, I'd just come here once a week, after I've finished reading the other sites.

Brian's been quite emo the last few weeks and has made some scary reflecting-on-life type of statements.  If he were to leave or shut the blog down entirely, I would miss the writing the most.  

Lots of other folks could plug alignments and down-and-distance into a UFR chart, but the crazy fan/journalist/engineer/liberal arts major/excited kid/weary old man/snarky internet bastard/funny dude in the seat next to you writing is special.


matty blue

September 10th, 2012 at 3:03 PM ^

i like to cook.  one of the first 'real' cookbooks i ever bought was julia child's "the way to cook," which became a real favorite of mine.  i'd tell people this, and they'd say something to the effect of "you're weird.  who reads cookbooks?  it's mostly true, too - the difference with julia child was that she found a way to write just about every sentence with life and verve and humor.

the UFR, while wonderfully wonky, isn't great because of its sheer wonkiness.  it's great (IMO) because, even in the midst of a blizzard of data, there are nuggets of good writing.  humor, self-deprecation, obscure references...anyone can gather numbers, only a good writer can give them life.

Smash Lampjaw

September 10th, 2012 at 2:37 PM ^

Did anyone else notice that he was dancing as he waited for the kickoffs? That would make a good gif to go with Vincent's guns. I do not wish that our special teams did that Falcon hand-swinging thing. Bless them, though.


September 10th, 2012 at 2:54 PM ^

The two Devins?  Do like they do in grade school: Devin G. and Devin F.  If six year olds can figure it out on their own, you would think the MSM could manage it.  Perhaps it is too much to ask.


September 10th, 2012 at 4:14 PM ^

...Deadspin article about the game and Denard's stats.

Yes, AFA was illegally moving all day long. From my vantage point in the bottom rows of Section 11, the slot RB forward motion prior to the snap on the TD run was blatantly obvious. Same goes for the time the QB started motioning right before the snap. I do not understand how so many of these calls were missed.

Anyhow, I'm happy for the win, especially since it happened on my birthday.


September 10th, 2012 at 4:40 PM ^

I'm not as concerned about the offensive line.  Running from under center with a blocking scheme other than zone is stupid with the personnel Michigan has.  Borges does a lot right, but I don't understand how people who know less about coaching football get this and it evades Borges.  I'm still optimistic about the rest of the year, but only if we can throw out running power from the I-form entirely.


September 11th, 2012 at 10:14 AM ^

Hey press guys, you don't have to work that hard to differentiate. Although their first names are the same, they do have different last names.

It seemed funny to me that they kept asking a question to just Devin. Is there some rule that you have to address them by their first names?